When it came to the three of them, each of the three had a rather important role to play within their triumvirate of a team. Though this team sometimes, no, always had their arguments, problems, and issues with getting their plans to work, their friendship was never truly in jeopardy of being ruined. So, who were these three gents you may ask?
First, there is Ed. He, though his lack of any constant positive intelligence is frightening for me, is the strongest of us. If he was first befriended by, for example, Kevin, then he would have turned out to be a stupid bodyguard who could do his job of protecting Kevin or his bicycle with no problems. "Luckily", and I use that term very loosely, the mastermind of all of the plans we try to perform found him first. Though his little sister is a pain, Ed is a soft, gentle giant who thinks of the world as one giant comic book, or video game when he gets really excited.
Then we have the mastermind, or Eddy, who creates all of their plans. He prefers to call them scams since his main idea for each plan is to bring in some serious income, and use whatever they get to buy jawbreakers larger than their heads! While I do like jawbreakers as much as the next kid, I prefer the smaller variety than the huge ones that he and some of the others tend to buy.
It took me months to get one of the large ones to fit in my mouth!
Anyway, Eddy tends to be the one to bail out first or last on his plans when they start showing signs of failure. The reason I use first and last, rather than picking one, is due to how serious or greedy he is with the plan of the day. If he REALLY wants the cash, then he'll stick through the plan even when it has fallen to ruin, and will still try to interest people in the cul-de-sac to him.
Then there is me.
Edd, though just about everyone calls me Double D. I'm the inventor of the group, often creating so many strange, unusual devices, and large playgrounds to allure the other kids into Eddy's pockets. I'm also a neat freak, which meant that I, normally, would make sure that whatever I had to build would work without any errors. That means I wouldn't make something if it was bound to fail its duty; however, it is normally the other Eds who somehow make whatever I build unsafe, or some other influence will do that for them, such as the other kids in the cul-de-sac, the Kanker Sisters, or even mother nature itself.
I'm also, dare I say, the most intelligent person in the cul-de-sac. If I had even a third of the sly tongue that Eddy had, then I could be creating my own plans and make my own cash to fund my project ideas. It is a nice idea, yet with my friends around me, that would never happen. Neither of them left the cul-de-sac at all, unless it was to school or to the candy shop, which I normally left with them, so there was no way to gain freedom for a day or two to earn my own cash.
"Hey sock head!" I shook my head to shake the thoughts from my brain, and found myself finished with the last coat of purple paint upon the wooden stand that I had built with the wood that Ed picked for me. With the exception of a few 2x4s, the other pieces were perfect for me to build the stand with the cloaked blinds that Eddy pictured. "If you're done painting, lets get this sheet on top so we can start speaking fortunes!"
Oh yes, the fortune-teller plan. It has some potential, yet it would have to come from a girl, or from myself, seeing as Ed doesn't have the skills to hold up a conversation, and Eddy was too untrustworthy to the other kids for them to take him seriously. With that said, the plan was doomed to failure, unless we had Nazz do the talking; however, in order to get her agreement, I calculated that we would have to create the proper garb that brought out her eyes and hair, yet was easy for her to maneuver-
"What is that?" I spoke out, shocked at the purple bath curtain that Eddy plucked from who knows where. Maybe from the junkyard? No, it was too new, or at least smelled clean, to have come from there.
"Oh this snazzy thing?" Eddy gave it a twirl, showing it off as if he was walking down the runway for a modeling company. That in itself was creepy. "This is the shade we'll use to keep our customers cool under the hot, blazing sun!"
"But Eddy!" I protested. "This will make the others think that we'll selling bath products like soaps, wash clothes, or rubber ducks instead of-"
"RUBBER DUCKIES ARE THE PERFECT WEAPON AGAINST THE INVADERS OF FISHAKUS!" Ed shouted from behind me. I turned to see him holding a brown rubber duck. Where he got it under such short notice, I truly didn't wish to think of the possible solutions, yet what made me annoyed was Eddy's laughter as he wrapped the shower curtain around me.
"Chill out sock head! This thing will work like a charm. Trust me for once!"
"I do trust you Eddy," Actually, that was somewhat of a lie, "But seriously! Why not get one of the covers from your room, or even a spare blanket from your closet?" Eddy gave me a glare that spoke little of what he truly felt, yet it was the sudden release of the curtain that made me feel like I had broken through his shell of stubbornness.
"Fine! But its your cover that we'll be using then. And it better match the purple paint!" I nodded and grabbed the shower curtain as I ran down towards my house. I heard a faint 'Give me back my curtain' behind me, but I had no time to stop, as I had a job to do.
When I finally entered my sticky-littered home, I knew where exactly the spare blankets were stored. Reaching the third closet in the dining room, I opened it to see the wooden dresser that my parents stored the spare bedding, and it was there that I found the lightest material I could find of a dark purple. Knowing that the color played a key role in attracting customers, I also grabbed a lavender sheet, and planned on arching it above the front of the stand so it could attract Jimmy, who normally held an interest for such light colors.
By the time I left, locked, and saw the stand within my viewing range, I knew that something was wrong. I didn't hear Ed or Eddy bickering at one another, nor did I see any new progress upon the fortune teller stand. When I actually reached the stand itself, I saw that, oh dear, there was a note left for me that was crudely written by Eddy.
"Dear Sockhead. I'm leaving with Ed and his family to go to the supermarket. I got bored just waiting for you, and know that you'll do fine without me to boss you around with building this. I don't know how long we'll be gone, since Sarah started asking to go to this clothing store as soon as she saw that Ed and I were coming with. Make me proud, and remember, I get 80 percent..." No. Nuh uh. Eddy would not be getting any of the profit. IN FACT, there would be no profit from this scam of his!
This...was my time. It was my moment to run a project by myself, and I knew what I could do instead of fortune telling. Eddy never did reveal as to where he would be getting his fortunes, as he didn't have a crystal ball in his room. So, it was at that point I realized that I didn't have to change a thing, seeing as none of them made any signs for the stand yet, which made it even easier for me to make this project my own.
After realizing what I wanted to do, I found myself working faster than I ever had before. Lifting about twenty more pounds than I normally could lift, I brought over a cement block that had the right depth and size hole for the plastic pipe I wanted to use as the sign for my project. I placed the covers on top of the stand, instantly feeling the overall temperature dropping by twenty degrees, and found a large piece of 2x10 wood to write on.
With the piece being a bit more than two feet long, I had more than enough space to write out what I wanted the stand to be known as. My penmanship could have been better, but I was so excited to see this idea of mine come into play that I didn't care that I was a bit sloppy.
A few minutes later, I found myself the owner of Edd's Advice Stand, and began my wait for interested people to show up by reading a book. I didn't know how long I'd wait, so I decided I would go for a few simple novels to pass the time, and hope that I'd have plenty of people to keep me busy soon.
"Hiya boys!" Unfortunately for me, the worst possibility happened, and I had no time to prepare myself for the tsunami that was known as the Kanker Sisters came upon my stand. I was fortunate enough that they didn't rip the main support just to see who was inside, yet I felt like I could have died when I saw all three of them stare upon me.
The first sister, May, is the youngest of the three Kankers. With her long, blonde hair, and buck teeth, she was often nicknamed as a Mrs. America reject by Kevin and Rolf, but she packed a rather mean punch when necessary. Her main crush was upon Ed, which made sense as I thought about it time and time again over the years, seeing as the two weren't exactly...bright, to put it nicely, and were easy to amuse.
The second sister, which was the one who hold a crush to me, is Marie. She prefers her hair to be short, though why she picked the color electric blue to dye it I couldn't understand. She was of fair height, about May's size, though she had the best personality of the three. Yes, May was nicest, yet her intelligence level was what made her an issue, for she followed Lee's words without hesitation most of the time.
Speaking of Lee, she was the eldest sister, as well as the one with curly orange hair and wore a red dotted tank top with a pair of blue jeans. She was like Eddy in many ways, from ordering her sisters around to creating some interesting ideas to torture the kids of the cul-de-sac. She was interested in Eddy, though two similar personalities like theirs would most likely lead to ruin and mistrust between the two.
Since they were kids, it should be surprising that I, a fellow kid, would be thinking of the long term when I should be thinking of short-term subject. As I am, I can't help but to think about the future, especially in terms of who I will one day marry, though I don't plan on dating any "babes" from the magazines Eddy waves around in his room. I'd like someone with a little personality, thank you very much.
"W-what can I help you with today ladies?" I asked, hoping they weren't going to kidnap me like they had with my friends in the past. They looked around the stand, as if expecting for the others to pop up at any moment to run off, attack them, or to shiver under the curtains they had used to act as the walls for the stand itself. It was Marie who refocused her gaze on him.
"Well honey, I'm happy to see you too!" Marie leaned over the counter with her eyelashes bashing to attract my gaze. She did have some dazzling eyes, but I couldn't allow myself to be distracted on one of them. If I did, then the other two could strike me!
"Where is my Eddy Double D?"
"Yea! I don't see my hunky Ed either! Aren't they, like, with you?" Though I nodded, I also felt the words I didn't really want to say escape my mouth.
"Yes, they were here, but they left to the store, and won't be back until tonight from the sounds of it. You can come back tomorrow to see them, or stay around." Did I ask them to stay. Did. I Ask. Them, the KANKERS, to STAY WITH ME? What was wrong with me today! This was not the normal Double D attitude, that was for sure.
"You...want us to stay around with you?" The three sisters asked this in unison. Living together, as well as being siblings, must have helped them naturally speak at the same time, though without testing I couldn't know for sure. Knowing I buried myself in a hole already, I nodded.
"What is this scam anyway Double D?" Marie asked as she leaned back to look at the sign I had left outside. A small gasp escaped her lips, why I didn't know, before I saw her bring herself back into the stand. "What kind of advice are you offering?" With that bit of information exposed, the other sisters focused on me with a seriousness I never liked before.
"Anything within reason of course. From how to improve the state of a messy room to being able to focus on homework with annoyances dancing outside of your window. I'll answer anything to the best of my ability."
"Oh?" The playfulness in Marie's tone frightened me, though I faintly smiled and nodded to the best of my ability. She sat on the counter and looked at my eyes with a grin worthy of a shark. "Since you're answering to the best of your ability, then tell me Double D. What can I do to make you fall in love with me?"
"Oooohhh!" May and Lee stated with a playful grin upon their faces as well. Of COURSE I would force myself into a corner like this. I ended up doing things like this with Eddy bossing me around when it came to inventions, so I guess I should create a better filter for myself in the future.
At this point, I sighed and placed an index finger upon the left side of my skull. I tapped it a few times, crafting the right things to say, seeing as this was me being personal and honest with Marie about my feelings. No male should ever enjoy making a girl cry, even if said girl made fun of, humiliated, and tortured them. It just wasn't right to ever do in my mind. I took a breath...
And spoke.
"Marie, the first thing you, and you two should listen as well, is that you can't just try to kidnap me or the Eds, and expect any of us to show a serious interest in you. If you were nicer, and maybe said a normal hello without any destructive intent behind it, then something could start to take root. On top of that, I don't know if we have anything in common, which is another problem.
"I like being neat, science, reading many books of all kinds, and getting my hands dirty with tools, or just with building whatever I want. If you like any of that, and I use the bare topics to give you a base, then we can work from there, and who knows where it could take us. Though don't be surprised if I still act scared, or if I don't want to get close to you. I, just like Ed and Eddy, have our own personal space that you have to warm up to."
The look on the sister's faces each spoke more than a picture ever could. May had stars in her eyes, either at how honest I was, or with the possibility that I would help her win Ed's heart, which I would try to if she asked me. Lee, though I couldn't see her eyes, the tucked in lip of rage she displayed showed that if I made Marie cry, then she would be showing me more than just the force of her knuckles would have upon my jaw. I was most afraid of Marie's reaction, for she seemed to be spacing out with her eyes widened rather far.
"Uh, Marie?" I whispered. Did I, by chance, say too much to her? Were my words too cruel. No, they weren't. I was nice with how I spoke, unlike Eddy or Ed, who could be cruel with their honesty. So why has she not said anything yet? After a minute of silence, Marie sighed, placed a hand on her chest as she closed her eyes, and nodded.
"I..." She looked back up at me, though this time her eyes seemed so gentle and fragile. Was what she about to say hard for her to do? "I like fish, and would like to know if you could help me set up a fish tank today?" The soft tone of her voice showed me just how honest she was being, as I never heard Marie talk in such a tone before. Her sisters were looking at her with shocked expressions of their own, yet it wasn't their reactions that mattered at the moment.
It was mine.
"Sure Marie. Are you going to buy the fish from the local shop, or are you going to catch your own?" My question seemed to have stumped her. She recovered quickly, sure, but was my question unusual?
"You can raise the fish you catch out of the creek?" Marie asked. I suppose that answered my question, yet her expression changed a moment later from a curious one to a sad one. "But the tank I have isn't big. Can it really fit fish from the creek?"
"Well," I began, "It all depends on the size of the tank itself. Otherwise, I'm sure we can find some fish that'll fit your tastes, and they'll enjoy living in your tank too!"
"Oh! Oh! Me next! Me next!" May shouted, wedging herself forward with both of her hands slammed on my stand at the same time. I couldn't help but to chuckle at her antics, as they were a bit cute with how childish yet innocent they were.
"Okay May. Ask me what you want help on."
"How do I get Ed to not run away from me?" Wow, a question that is slightly related to getting Ed to like her. I couldn't help but be extremely impressed with how she took a baby step, rather than ask for a full-force question like Marie had. "I mean, I noticed how he literally will do everything in his power to run away from us, and he doesn't like dealing with his own sister for christ sake! I don't want him to treat me as if I'm a monster Double D!"
"Well, what do you know about Ed?" I went for a simple approach to see what she knew of my friend. If she knew enough about him, then it would be easy to help guide her along the right path to get his attention. May nodded to herself before smiling.
"Well he likes monster and sci-fi movies!" That was a start. Did she know anything else about him though? "He also likes comics, drawing, video games I'd assume, and acting like a superhero!" The classic Superman pose May did was cute and funny, and I wasn't the only one to think that either.
"Aww look! Its Super May to the rescue to save her love from the evil torture that is Nasily Sarah!" Surprisingly enough, we all laughed at the joke Lee made, which caught me off-guard. I didn't like making fun of others, nor did I support the act. Maybe because it was made in light humor that I laughed?
"Yes yes! You know enough about what he likes to start a conversation with him!" Lee gave me a doubtful expression as soon as I said that.
"Double D, we both know that Ed isn't exactly a linguistics specialist here. He can't really talk to anyone except to you Eds!"
"That is true." I nodded, accepting what she had said. Maybe it was the fact I agreed against a downside of Ed, but Lee seemed shocked at what I did. "But if you, May, asked him about some comics to read and buy, or to even suggest his opinion of what sci-fi movies to watch with your sisters, then he'll be more open to talking to you about that kind of stuff.
"From there, you can ask him stuff like how his day went, what did he do, or even suggest acting out scenes of a comic. Better yet, if you can warm up to him enough, I'm sure he wouldn't mind the idea of trying to make a movie!"
"A movie!" May shouted with shooting stars in her eyes. I nodded, knowing full well that Ed, for years now, wanted to be the star in his own adventure movie with monsters in it. If a movie ever did get made, Eddy would be happy with whatever cash they made from the showing. As long as he kept plenty of it of course.
"Ed has always wanted to be a hero in a movie, and Eddy would love to make one to bring in some cash. So, as long as you and Ed are friends by that point, Eddy wouldn't have a problem using you in the movie."
"And us?" Lee asked in a serious tone. I didn't know the exact tone to use with her, or what to say as an answer, so I went with my gut, something I rarely did.
"As long as you don't cause any trouble, or bother Eddy, who likes to be in control of everything, then yea. I can always talk him into an idea when it comes to something on a big level." I didn't expect to have May fling herself on me and gave me a rather tight hug, though what I didn't ever expect to happen was get a kiss on the cheek from her. Despite seeing Marie's shocked expression, I couldn't help but to blush at the act.
"Thanks Double D! Now you ask him something Lee!" May appeared behind the oldest sister in a flash and pushed her forward, forcing the orange-hared girl up to the counter. I had to admit, I was unsure if I had an answer to whatever Lee may ask, especially if it was Eddy based. I had to answer whatever she asked though, as that was what I wanted to do with the stand.
"I...ugh, how do I put this...I." Lee paused, glancing behind her to see May and Marie's confused expressions. What was making her act like this, I couldn't help but wonder. She turned around with a small smile, and that made me shiver with a slight warmth in my heart. Just what were the Kanker sisters doing to me? "Could you shut down the stand and help my sisters out with their questions?"
"Huh?" Neither of Lee's sisters or myself expected that question to be asked. A blush of embarrassment crawled on her face when she realized that all eyes were on her, and looked the other way.
"I didn't stutter!" She exclaimed with a small frown that, for some reason or another, I knew was just to mask the smile that threatened to appear. "I know that you don't like sitting around doing nothing, so I wanted to know if you could shut this place down and help Marie with her tank, and with May finding some movies and comic books for her to read for her to get closer to her man."
"Uh...sure!" Despite the original idea behind having the booth open until the time my parents arrived, but I could see helping Marie catch a fish, as well as finding May comics that not only had women as the main focus, but some that Ed liked as well. Those two alone would take the rest of the afternoon, and if Lee had asked for some help as well, then it could very well expand into the next day! "Could you help me put this in my backyard? Once we're done, I need to grab some stuff before we head out, so you can rest in the living room before we go. Is that alright?" The Kanker Sisters looked at one another before turning back to me.
"Sure Double D." I didn't fully understand the smile that formed on my face as we stepped out of the booth and began taking the sheets and sign down. Yet, as we worked together to take this into my backyard, I couldn't help but feel proud at the sight of me working together with the Kanker Sisters, rather than running or fighting against them.
Getting it into the backyard was easy enough, though I felt nervous about allowing them into my house to sit for a bit so I could get my wallet and help cover for the fish supplies and the comics I'd be helping Marie and May purchase. I didn't stop them from walking in with their shoes on, and I offered them a drink before I went upstairs. Oddly enough, only Lee declined a drink, and the other sisters wanted a Fanta Orange, rather than the Dr. Pepper or Pepsi I offered, which surprised me.
A few minutes later, I locked the house with my house key and followed the Kankers over to their trailer, hoping that what I would be doing with them today would go over smoothly.
-Author Note-
So this is a small idea that I had after reading a few Ed, Edd, and Eddy fanfics from my android phone over my little hiatus, and I couldn't let this idea escape me for long. I don't think I'll be doing too many stories for this show, and if I do they'll be Edd based, so I apologize for anyone looking forward to anything based on the other characters. With that said, I do not own Ed, Edd, and Eddy, or any other soda, brand name, or and other references in the story.
This story, which was originally to be a one-shot, hence why the ending is as it is, can expand quite the bit if I chose to do so. The next chapter would be with Edd waiting on the Kanker Sisters to get ready at their apartment before leaving on bikes to the bookstore and the antique place that is shown in the show to find her some comics and graphic novels. The third chapter would be focused on Marie and the pet shop that will have most of the fish supplies they'll need, as well as finding out if she wants to catch her own fish, or to buy some from there to put in her tank.
If there is no fish catching, then the rest of that chapter would be with them back at the trailer working on the fish tank and letting it run for the rest of the night before putting in the fish, which would be the last time that Marie could catch a fish at that point for my tastes, until she gets more comfortable with raising fish of course. Either way, that night will lead to Lee talking to Edd, a nice dinner, and our main character going home. I could end the story there, but I do have more ideas.
For example, an extra chapter of the next day to see him talking to Ed and Eddy about what happened the previous day. I could follow that with the Kankers trying a new approach to the Eds, which would be interesting to see. Otherwise, it would be some time-skips to see how the girls have progressed over middle school, mostly since I haven't introduced an age limit to the gang, and lead to more bonding between Edd and the Kankers.
Either way, this is the current product of my Edd brainstorming, and I do hope that you readers have enjoyed it. Though, to be honest, I think this will be the last time I do first person, seeing as I nearly kept on putting him and he where I placed first person pronouns that wouldn't make sense if I went with third person.
Thanks for reading and, until next time, stay golden!