"J's Anime Skits"
Hey. I'm Jyro, and I'm the writer. I've decided that the world is just.. too normal, and as a result, decided to make it more... unusual by adding a fanfic to my list. And since the world also makes WAY too much sense(understanding why is WAY overrated), I've decided that this would be a random set of small stories from my dark and twisted mind. If you don't understand it, then good- you have found the reason for it. If you don't think it's funny, then you're not used to wild humor. Or my definition of it, at least. As far as I know, these stories may have nothing to do with eachother, or they may have everything to do with eachother. We'll all be waiting to find out...
Disclaimer: I own these stories. I do not own the characters. I don't really care who does because I'm not making any money off this, so I don't bother claiming ownership and paying them a cut. Yes, I AM insane... How did you guess?
Author's Note: I am a not-so-sane person with a twisted sense of humor... I can be a cruel, heartless fanfic writer when I want to be... I wouldn't anger me if I were you because I can't anger myself...
/Where-ever here/ is a scene-change.
'Thoughts here', is thinking.
"Words here" is speaking.
!# START CHAPTER #!
(1)((Furuba)) Chapter 1- "Cruelty"
Kagura is sitting on a bench, staring into the clouds. 'I wonder if Kyou will ever truly love me..', she thinks, and sighs. 'I miss him already. I should visit him soon.' Suddenly, she hears footsteps approaching her.
"Kagura!"
Kagura turned around. What she saw in front of her shocked her.
"K-Kyo!"
Kyo is standing just a few feet behind her. 'That takes care of missing him. Funny, just when I'm planning to visit him, HE comes here and visits ME! Maybe he doesn't hate me..', Kagura thinks while looking at him in surprise.
"There's something I have to tell you.", says Kyo. 'It sounds like whatever he has to say is pretty important.', Kagura thinks. 'I wonder if he's here to confess his love!', Kagura thinks, her heart racing.
"Y-yes? What is it!", Kagura said, feeling curious, excited, hopeful, and VERY anxious.
"I...", says Kyo, pausing from nervousness. Then little hearts popped into his eyes and a silly grin plastered itself on his face. "I love you!", he shouted, looking dreamily off into the distance.
"Oh... OH MY GOSH! Really? REALLY! You DO!", Kagura screamed with enthusiasm. Little hearts popped into her eyes, and she ran to hug Kyo.
"No.", Kyo said, a silent, tiny little "duh" attached to it by the tone. For Kagura, it seemed as if the world stopped spinning. The little hearts in her eyes ripped in two and fell to the ground in little, leafy pieces.
"Wha-what?", Kagura asked, stopping in mid-tackle and no longer showing any emotion and looking REALLY confused.
"I was JOKING, you idiot! I HATE you!", Kyo said almost happily, an evil smirk now formed on his face where the smile had been. The hearts in his eyes had turned into evil flames as he laughed a malicious, stereotype "MWAHAHAHAHAH!" while Kagura just looked at him, teary-eyed.
Just before Kagura's lips would have begun to tremble and eyes to water, she glared angrily at Kyo. Angrily enough, in fact, that a wind- and thunder-storm began to form behind her. Lightning struck with ferocity as she contemplated what to do next. It took her no longer than a fraction of a second to realize that she would rather do unspeakable bodily harm to Kyo right now than wait a few seconds to plan out something more... painful.
"Kyo, you JERK!", Kagura yelled, charging Kyo. Kyo stopped laughing and dodged, but much too late. The smirk on his face fell when he realized that Kagura charged faster than he could dodge. Kagura knocked him to the ground and they rolled together a few times before Kyo sat up.
"You'll PAY FOR THAT!", Kagura screamed, her arms tightening around Kyo's neck and her legs squeezing his ribs under his arms tighter than she ever had before.
"AARRLLKK!", Kyo screamed, his cries muffled from Kagura's arms. Kyo managed to get his fingers around Kagura's forearms, and loosen the pressure on his windpipe.
"AAAAGH! GET OFF MEEEEE!", Kyo shouts, running in little circles, trying to get Kagura off off him.
/Back at Shigure's house.../
"AAAAGH!" is heard way off in the distance.
"I wonder what Kyo's got himself into this time...", Shigure said thoughtfully.
"Do you think he's okay? Maybe I should go see what's wrong...", Tohru said, looking very worried.
"You can't just leave Hanajima and Uotani here alone. They're you're company.", Shigure told Tohru, hoping that she wouldn't get involved.
"Ah! I'm sorry, I forgot! How silly of me!", Tohru said with a smile.
Meanwhile, over in the corner, Yuki is standing next to Uotani, both trying to suppress a chuckle. Very quickly, he slips her handful of cash. Leaning over to her while Tohru's distracted, he whispers in her ear.
"How did you get rid of Kyo this time?" Uotani just smirked as she answered him.
"It was easy. First, I said he was afraid of that one girl that like... stalks him or something. He said he wasn't, and I told him to prove it. Hana promised to act as a lie-detector when he comes back so that I don't have to follow him. From what I've heard of those two, a half-mile radius at LEAST is preferrable right now..."
!# END CHAPTER #!