Hi there! So I started a new story and I hope it's up to your standards. It's jade centric. I worked pretty hard on this so tell me if you like it!

I DO NOT OWN VICTORIOUS

Jade

It's one of those days. I feel sick to my stomach with rage. I'm not sure why. This sorta thing just happens. I wake up and suddenly I'm pissed off. There are literally so many reasons I don't know where to start. Beck and I broke up a while ago. That's not why I'm pissed though. It was actually a very clean break up. In fact we're closer now. I'm pissed because his new girlfriend, Taren, thinks she can tell us when we're allowed to talk. I'm furious because everyone in the government is an idiot, my mom is a drunk, my dad doesn't call, and I'm pretty sure I'm getting an ulcer.

My therapist says I worry too much. "You're taking on the weight of the world." She says. Well I wouldn't have to if literally anyone in the world was smart enough to fix this shit. I roll over on my bed and clutch my aching stomach. Maybe she's right. If I didn't care so much maybe I wouldn't always want to throw up. Oh no, now I actually have to throw up.

I run to the bathroom as fast as I can and give up my fears to the toilet. Without going into detail I will say it was the burning awful kind of puke. As soon as it was over I scrubbed my teeth for 3 minutes and they headed back to my room.

I considered calling in sick but that seemed weak. I was Jade West. I could handle a little tummy ache. Looking at the clock I noticed I only had a half an hour so I decided to slum it a bit. No I was not sporting sweats and a messy bun. My idea of "fuck it" is a pair of black skinny jeans and a Lou Reed's shirt (Rest in Peace) with my hair done and as much mascara as I feel like doing at the time.

Soon I'm out the door and into my car. I stop to get a coffee (black, 2 sugars) and begin my trek to school. I am greeted by Cat in the parking lot. She is sporting a Pajelehoocho and big sunglasses. "What up with the shades?" I ask her as I get closer.

"The other day I read your diary-"

"CAT!"

"And you said you only saw darkness so I tried walking around with my eyes closed but I kept bumping into stuff. I even got a bruise, see!" She lifted up her shirt to show a small yellowish spot of her side, "So I thought these glasses might give me the Jade perspective."

"First of all: It's a journal. Second: If you ever touch my JOURNAL again I will burn an effigy of your likeness in that very same pajelehoocho. And third: When I said I only see darkness I meant-"

"HEY TORI!" Cat squealed before sprinting over to her "gal pal" Vega. That chick irked me. She didn't do anything but that was exactly the point. She didn't have to do anything. She just smiled and flipped her then suddenly opportunities spread their legs like a 2 dollar whore. I bet she never woke up having to spew due to her anxiety. I'm even willing to guess she gets 8 hours of sleep. Fuck Tori Vega.

I head to Sikowitz's class where I will spend the day. I bet you're wondering if we even go to other classes. The answer is yea, sometimes. We're seniors now so we kinda of get to pick and choose what we do. It's very different from public school. I'm Sikowitz's student aid so I spend 2 periods with him. I'm also in his advanced acting class so there's another period. And then since I doubled up on all my other core classes I have enough credits to have 3 study halls. Sometimes I go to Ms. Franks for screenwriting but I usually just wallow in self-pity in my home away from…hell.

The lack of sleep from the past few days makes class unbearable. "I'm leaving." I announce.

"And why is that?" Sikowitz asks. I turn around and glare at him. He erupts into giggles before sipping on his coconut and asking Robbie to come on stage. As I leave my eye catches Vega's and I can see worry flash across her face. I flip her off and walk out. I hear a, "Wow, really?" leave her mouth before the door shuts.

I am hiding now. Well I guess it isn't hiding because all my friends know where I am but I'm still trying to be alone. I just need to breathe. I lie down and use my bag as a pillow to rest my head on. I'm about to fall asleep when the thoughts come back.

What if you don't make it as a writer? Could you even handle a real job?

You shouldn't have come to school today I can just feel something evil. Do you think Sinjin will shoot the place up? I guess it wouldn't matter. I mean we're all gonna die sometime. At least this wouldn't be a slow painful death from cancer. At least you'd have a bit of fame, right? A 15 minute memorial on the local news. Oh god you're gonna puke again.

And I did. Luckily the Janitors' closet has plenty of trashcans. I wipe my mouth right when the bell rings. Lunch time.

I grab a salad and head to our table. I don't talk but to ensure no one bothers me I throw in a couple sarcastic remarks. Beck pats my arm and smiles at me. He knows me; he knows I'm not okay.

"Becky Poo! What the hell? I thought you was sitting with me today." Taren shouts. It pains me to say this but we do have similar traits. We're both fairly bossy only she has this jersey girl thing going for her. Beck gives us all a small wave and heads off.

Tori scoots closer to me and I growl at her. She's scared for a second but then giggles to herself. Everyone else was talking and enjoying themselves when that clumsy little shit Robbie ran over. If we're honest I don't actually dislike him, he just irks me. Anyways, he's running with food in his hand and trips. Guess who it falls on.

Me.

"Oh my God. Jade…I-I am SO sorry!" Robbie stutters. I don't move. I clench my teeth and think for a second. I know it's dumb since it was such a small thing but it feels like the last straw. I begin to laugh.

"Jade? You okay?"

I wasn't. And they could all sense that. I didn't yell or scream or threaten. I just sat there. Tori watched me the most. As if at any second I might implode.

"You know they often say 'Sometimes in life you don't get what you want.' I've realized that's a lie. It's actually most times that you do not get what you want. Most times things are terrible. In fact they always are." I said before lying my head down on the lunch table and beginning to cry. No one moved.

"Jade I really didn't think it was so bad. I'm really sorry. Take these napkins." Robbie said desperately. Cat began to whimper and Andre hugged her. I stood up and wiped my face.

I simply said, "Sorry." Before taking my things and heading to my car.

When I got there I noticed I'd been followed. Tori slides into the passenger seat and sits quietly. For a second I simply stare at her and consider ripping off her face. But then the nausea is back. So instead I sob wildly in the parking lot with Tori Vega rubbing my back. "Get out and switch seats." She says.

I do. She takes my keys and begins to drive me home. She plugs her pearphone in and begins playing some soft acoustic songs. Eventually I stop crying. The music plays all the way home but we don't say a word.

Once we arrive she takes me into the house and I lie down on my couch. She brings me over a cup of coffee and a few packets of sugar. "Vega I-"

"We don't have to talk." She says. I nod.

I sit up to sip my coffee and begin to watch her. She catches me staring and holds my gaze. She smiles softly. "I'm going to ask you to do something that might make us both uncomfortable. You don't have to do it. Also realize that this is only happening because I'm crying" I say still staring, "Please come lay with me for a bit. Beck and I used to cuddle when I was…like this. So I kinda want that."

She stood and walked slowly over to me. I put down my coffee and lay down. She pulled the blanket from the back of the couch and wrapped it around us. I lifted my head as her arm snaked under me. I cuddled into her shoulder and closed my eyes. She smelled like vanilla.

I fell asleep listening to her hum a lullaby I'd heard somewhere before. Somewhere magical. Kind of like her.