Quatre in Wonderland
Chapter One: The Mysterious White Rabbit


REWRITE: This was the first fanfic I wrote and took seriously. I've decided to rewrite it and throw in a bit of knowledge I've gained in the art of writing. Hope ya'll like it!! Please keep in mind that this is a SATIRE of the classic story, "Alice in Wonderland." I love Gundam Wing and all versions of Alice: however! comedy has it's place, and this story is chock-full of it. Please don't take anything too seriously. If you do, you will not like this story at all.

Since this is a rewrite, I've added all of the warnings/ratings/pairings for the entire series at the beginning. I will not add this in any other chapter. Each chapter will have it's own individual set.

Warnings: yuri, yaoi, shounen ai, OOC for Trowa (I cannot stress this enough. He is totally OOC for nearly all of the story. Just warning anyone who expects the canon Trowa, cause that's not going to happen here), het flirting, a little stereotypical (used for humor reasons)

Rating: PG-13 (as of yet, this may change with the rewrite)

Pairings: 3x4, 2x1, Rx1 (King and Queen relationship), 6x13, C/4, R/D, S/5

Warnings: OOC for Trowa, shounen ai

Rating: PG

Pairings: The slightest hint of 4/3

Quatre Raberba Winner sat in the middle of a field of daises, surrounded by twenty-nine, book-reading older sisters. His cute, orange kitten, Dinah, was sitting in his lap, trying to destroy a nearby daisy with her little paws.

"Is it tea-time yet?" One of the many sisters asked the oldest, Iria.

Iria glanced down at her watch. "No, dear, we still have another hour."

The other girl smiled, "You know, Iria, you probably should give Quatre his history lesson some time soon. Didn't you say you were to give it to him before tea time?" she said and went back to reading her book.

Quatre groaned and looked at Iria through slightly narrowed eyes. "I do not need a history lesson."

"Oh, my, yes you do, dear brother!" Iria exclaimed, digging through the satchel that sat beside her which was filled with books of all nature.

Quatre rolled his eyes. "Iria, please, I-"

Iria stood up and grabbed Quatre's arm, pulling him with her. "No fussing, Quatre. You have to have a history lesson."

"But those books are so boring! What's the point of my having to learn about wars that happened so many years ago? Or having to learn about dead people?"

Iria shook her index finger at him, "Don't begin a sentence with 'but,' Quatre."

Quatre merely rolled his eyes, allowing Iria to pull him towards a tree that sat by a small stream. Dinah pranced after her owner, stopping every so often to swat at a butterfly.

Once they arrived at the tree, Iria sat down, smoothing her skirt over. "Now, sit down, Quatre. Please pay attention today. I don't need you daydreaming again!"

Quatre sighed, but gave in to his sister and leaned up against the tree. He picked a daisy out of the patch of daisies that lined the stream's bank. He hovered it over Dinah's head, who swatted at it. He stopped and looked up when he heard Iria angrily clear her throat.

"Pay attention!" she declared, opening the book she had in hand. "Now! I believe that yesterday we were discussing the first half of-"

"Do you realize just how horrible those books are, Iria? I mean, they don't even have any pictures in them. What's a book without pictures?" Quatre questioned, flicking an ant that had gotten too close to him.

"Stop asking questions, just pay attention!" Iria said with great frustration.

Quatre went back to flicking bugs away from him and picking daises. He had started to go off on a daydream when he felt Dinah rub against his hand and meow.

"Hmm?" he muttered softly, as to not disturb the already agitated Iria.

Dinah walked over to the stream, flicking the tip of her tail ever so slightly.

That's when Quatre saw what his sweet little kitten had seen. He blinked a few times, just to be sure that he was not merely imagining things. What he saw before him was what looked very much like a white rabbit, walking upright. The creature was too far away to really see much, however, Quatre did manage to detect that it had two white ears. It also wore a vest, along with a pair of black trousers.

Quatre looked at Iria, who was intensely engaged in reading a rather long, dull passage about so-and-so army defeating so-and-so army, and the specifics of each general's advancements into enemy territory, and so on. He ever so slowly began to move away her. He went around to the other side of the tree, then crept off toward the white rabbit with Dinah in tow. As Quatre grew further away, Iria's voice faded off, her lesson of history becoming nearly pointless since Quatre was no longer in ear-shot, and she surely knew all that she was lecturing.

Before Quatre could stop her, Dinah stealthily crept into a tall patch of grass, then pounced on top the rabbit.

"Get off me, you abomination!!" the rabbit cried, his arms flailing about, trying to get the meowing Dinah away from him. "Can't you tell how late I am? Do you hear me? LATE!!! The queen will have my head!"

By now, Quatre was crouched down next to Dinah and the rabbit. The 'rabbit,' Quatre could now tell, was not a rabbit at all. He scooped Dinah up in his arms.

"I'm sorry for my kitten. But, may I ask, who are you, exactly?"

"I am a person, just like you," the little man said, rolling his eyes.

Quatre's eyes widened slightly as he saw the man remove his ears, which had only been a head-band with fake ears attached to it. Quatre let out a small laugh when he saw the frustrated little man jam the headband into his pocket.

"Now, if you'll excuse me…" the little man growled, beginning to walk away.

"But why are you so small? And why were you dressed up as a rabbit?" Quatre questioned with curiosity blatant in his voice. It was obvious, however, that the little man did not want to answer Quatre's questions.

"Look!," the little man scowled, thrusting his pocket-watch up in Quatre's direction, "you've made me even more late! I still haven't found that stupid rabbit and that annoying little girl with the cat in the field of daises! And, I'm already late!!"

"No little girls live around here. All of sisters are teenagers or older."

"No little girls you say? Well, that's interesting. Damn Duo! I bet he was trying to confuse me again. Well, I'll show him. C'mon...um, what's your name?"

" My name is Quatre, and that's Dinah."

"Quatre? Doesn't even sound like Alice. Anyway, c'mon, we have to go down this rabbit hole over here. C'mon, let's go. Can't take all day."

Quatre followed the little man and stopped at the rabbit hole, which was just at the bottom of a tree. "What's your name?"

"Is that really important?" The smaller man asked, grumbling. "Trowa, okay? Now let's go, we're late!"

With that, Quatre squeezed his way into the rabbit hole, Trowa and Dinah following behind him.

"Wow! This is amazing!" Quatre exclaimed, gasping at the scene around him.

He, Dinah, and Trowa were now descending down a vertical passageway, but were floating gently all the way. They passed empty marmalade jars, rocking chairs, book-cases, and many other regular house-hold items which (unlike them), hung in mid-air. Quatre reached out to touch one of the jars, but he had already floated past it before his hand could reach far enough.

Trowa raised an eyebrow. "Yeah, I guess so. If you like the bizarre, 'I think I'm suffering from dementia,' falling thing."

"You didn't really answer my question, Trowa," Quatre said, not having much else to say while they made their downward journey.

Trowa, however, just stared blankly.

"Why were you dressed up like a rabbit?"

"Oh," Trowa muttered, sighing aloud. "Because I was trying to find Alice."

Before Quatre could ask who Alice was, and after what seemed like nearly an hour of floating, the three were in a very large, nearly empty room. In the center of the room there was a glass table with a golden key and a small, glass bottle on it.

"See that key up there?" Trowa asked, pointing up to the gold key on the table.

Quatre nodded, noting to himself just how large the difference in size between himself and Trowa really was. Trowa wasn't any taller than one of the feet of the table, while Quatre towered well over the table. Even Dinah was bigger than Trowa, but Quatre kept his laughter from thinking about this to himself: he didn't assume that Trowa would find this very funny.

"Pick it up and hand it to me. It's amazing how dense some people are about these sorts of things, really."

Quatre was confused, but bent down to hand the key to Trowa. Trowa, in turn, nearly fell over when given the key. A look of disgust quickly came over his face.

"Okay, now, drink all of what's in that bottle," he huffed.

Blinking a bit out of confusion, the blonde obeyed and drank the glass bottle politely labeled "DRINK ME".

What happened next amazed Quatre to no end. Quatre felt himself become smaller...and smaller...and smaller, until he was the around the same height as Trowa.

When Quatre was a bit shorter than the other, he looked into the emerald eyes.

"Wow..."Quatre trailed off.

Trowa snorted a little bit, but smiled inwardly. "Let's go! We have to go see Queen Relena!"

The now taller of the two then walked over to a door that Quatre had not noticed before. Trowa made a small amount of chit-chat with the door. A talking door, however, didn't really surprise Quatre at this point. After unlocking the door, Trowa threw the key back into the room ("Who knows who might need it, and you'd be surprised at what kind of people come here thinking, 'Doors are never locked!'" came from Trowa, which made Quatre laugh.)

After the two, Dinah squeezed in through the door, which was a relief to Quatre. Who knew what trouble she could get into all by herself!

I hope that you have enjoyed the story thus far! I honestly don't think I will be making any serious plot changes (compared to the original), but I'll take it as it comes! Feel free to review and check out the old version.