Welcome! This story was originally written as the fourth chapter of my GB Loud House story (which is no longer up), but I thought it'd work as it's own story, so I decided to post it as such. In addition to this, there will be plenty more original chapters originally meant for that story, so I hope you all enjoy it!

It was a beautiful Saturday Morning in the Loud House. As Linka walks out of her room, dressed in her usual attire, she acknowledges the viewer, "Aaaaah, Saturday. The first half of the greatest part of the week: the weekend." She walks down the hallway, still talking, "No school, no homework, and all the free time to do whatever I…" She was so focused on talking, she didn't take notice to a soccer ball on the floor until she stepped on it, propelling her forward, "WAAAAAAAA!" When she landing on her face, she heard a loud pop and felt a rush of air underneath her.

Just then, her brothers all rushed out of their rooms, and they gather around Linka. Loki asked, "Linka, are you OK?!"

She stands up and dusts herself off, "I'm fine." She looks down and notices the soccer ball, which was now flat as a pancake, "Can't say the same for this ball, though."

"Aw, man!" Lynn Jr. approached his sister and snatched the ball away, "Look what you did to my ball, Linka!"

Linka looked guilty and apologized, "Sorry, Lynn. It was an accident."

"Oh, yeah? Well, this is on purpose!" He had his fist raised when he said 'this', and then punched his younger sister in her right arm.

"OW!" She grabs her arm and yells, "What the heck, Lynn?!"

"HEY!" Without warning, Loki picked up his sport loving brother by his jersey and slams him against the wall.

Lynn lets out a painful 'oomph'. Lynn was scared out of his gourd. His siblings, excluding Linka, were glaring at him, so he asks, "Whoa, whoa! What did I do?"

Loki explained, "Lynn, there is literally one rule in this house: NEVER! HIT! LINKA!"

He asked, "Why not? We all punch each other all the time!"

Linka interjected, "He's right, Loki. You do." She looks back to the viewer, "Whenever my brothers get on each other's nerves, it usually results in one of them getting punched."

Loki and Loni were asleep in their rooms, until the sound of rock music resonated so loud, both boys woke up screaming in surprise. Loki gets out of his bed, looking quite peeved, and goes across the hall to Luke and Lane's room.

Offscreen, Luke says, "Morning, bro!" There was punch sound, "OW!"

Loki walks back out of the room, "That's for waking me up!"

Lane was in Lars and Lynn's room, where he proceeded to knock on the goth's coffin, "Knock-knock!"

From inside the coffin, Lars calls out, "Who's there?"

"Ivan."

"Ivan who?"

Lane opens the coffin, causing Lars to hiss at the light entering. Lane was holding Lars bust of his fictional vampire crush, Griselda, and replied in a Transylvanian accent, "I van to suck your blood!"

Lars grabs the bust and punches his older sibling, causing the jokester to rub his arm in pain, "That's for touching Griselda." Lars closes his coffin back.

Lane shrugged, "Sorry! Didn't mean to be a pain in the neck!"

Lars's arm reached out of his coffin and punched Lane's arm a second time, "That's for the pun."

Lexx walks into his and Leif's room, gasping at the sight of Leif using one of the little prince's acting trophies to pick his own nose. Lexx quickly grabs the trophy and punches Leif in the arm, "That's for getting your boogers all over my trophy!"

Leif responds by punching Lexx in the arm, "That's for punching me!"

"MOM!" Lexx ran out of the room, "Leif hit me!"

"TATTLETALE!"

Levi was in his room working with chemicals when Lynn walks in. Levi acknowledges his older brother, "Greetings, fifth-eldest sibling. To what do I owe this unexpected intrusion?" Without warning, Lynn punches the four-year-old genius in the arm, causing him to yell in pain, "OUCH!" Levi grabs his arm, "What did I do?"

Lynn shrugged, "I don't know. I just felt like punching someone."

Linka finishes, "See what I mean?"

Loki explained to Lynn, "Newsflash, dingus! We're boys, and Linka is a girl!"

Luke pokes Lynn's check with his index finger, "You never hit a girl!"

Lane points his thumb to Loni, who was standing behind the prankster, "Why do you think we never punch Loni?"

Loni cocked a brow, "Wait. I'm a girl?" Loni looks at his clothes and gasps, "Oh my gosh! I can't be seen in boy's clothes! I need to update my wardrobe!" He runs downstairs, "TO THE MALL!"

After a few seconds of silence as Loni rushed off, everyone brought their attention back to Lynn. Loki concludes, "Point is, DON'T! HIT! OUR! SISTER!" Loki places Lynn in front of Linka, "Now apologize!"

"OK, OK!" Lynn frowns, "Sorry for punching you, sis."

Linka waves her hand at Lynn, "It's fine. Sorry I popped your ball."

Lynn shrugs, "It's all good." He throws the popped ball over his shoulder, "I've got a bunch of those."

Lynn walks back into his room, leaving his other brothers to gather around Linka.

Loki walked over and picked Linka up bridal style, "There, there, sis. Everything's gonna be OK."

Luke asks, "Are you OK, baby sis?" He pulls up Linka's shirt sleeve to inspect where she was hit, "You're not bruising, are you?"

Leif offered, "I can get you an ice pack."

Lexx offered, "You want some water?"

Levi suggested, "I have some ointment in my room that can alleviate the pain."

Linka interrupted, "Guys, I'm fine. It doesn't even hurt." She pats the part of her arm that was hit, but then winced in pain, "Ow! Dang. Lynn really packs a wallop."

Lars popped up, scaring everyone, "I can leave a dead rat in Lynn's bed tonight if you want."

"Uh… thanks, but no thanks, Lars."

Loki got an idea, "I know what'll cheer you up!"

In the living room, Linka was relaxing on the couch, with Lane massaging her feet, Luke strumming his acoustic guitar in a soothing melody, Lars reading a copy of Princess Pony out loud to her, and Lexx holding a tea kettle, "More hot cocoa, big sis?"

Linka holds out her mug, "Yes, please!" After Lexx pours some cocoa into it, Linka tells her brothers, "You guys didn't have to do all this for me."

Loki shows up holding a basket of clean laundry, "After what Lynn did, you deserve it, sis." He reaches into the basket, "Oh, and remember when Loni accidently washed the polka dots from your favorite sweater?" He pulls out a sweater that was covered in different colored polka dots, "Levi managed to get them back in!"

Levi slyly explains, "Let's just leave it to the imagination how I managed that little feat."

Leif showed up holding a bag of trash, "And don't worry about your chores! We've already taken care of them!"

Linka explains, "But taking out the trash isn't my chore."

Leif shrugged, "I know. I just like taking it out."

Linka says to the viewer, "This is great! Who knew getting punched by Lynn would be the best thing to happen to me?"

Loni walked back into the house, dressed just like his female counterpart, "Hi, everyone! Look at the dress I found! Isn't it totes adorbs?!"

His siblings merely stared at the airhead, Luke asking, "Should we tell him?"

Lane replied, "Nah! I want to see how long we can drag this out for. Hahaha! Get it?"

His siblings groaned at his joke.

The next morning, Linka walks into the kitchen and sees Lynn, "Hi, Lynn!"

"Hey, sis." He bites into a toaster pastry and tell Linka, "Sorry again about yesterday."

"It's OK." She opens the pantry and reaches for a box of toaster pastries. She opens the box, shocked to see it empty. She turns it upsides, making a few crumbs fall out. She scoffs, "LYNN!"

Lynn looks to his sister, taking another bite, "What?"

"You ate the last Toasty Tart, and you put the box back in the pantry, even though it's empty!"

Lynn shrugged, "I put it back in so Mom knows to get more."

Linka rolls her eyes, "Whatever! Can you at least share half of it?"

"You know the old saying: You snooze, you lose." He throws the last bit of pastry into the air and catches it in his mouth.

As Linka marches away in anger, she stops and grins. Walking back to Lynn, she tells the jock, "And I know another old saying: Never hit a girl!"

Lynn scoffed, "For the last time, I'm sor…"

Lynn was cut off by Linka punching herself in the arm, causing her to cry out, "OW!"

At the sound of her cry, the other brothers rushed in and Loki asked, "What's going on in here?!"

Linka worked up some tears, which were half real from how hard she hit herself and lied, "I-I was coming into the kitchen to get a Toasty Tart, b-but Lynn was eating the last one; s-so I asked if we could split it and he-he-he HIT ME!"

Lynn was shocked and defended himself, "WHAT? No, I didn't! She punched herself!"

Luke glared at Lynn, "Not cool, dude! It's one thing to hit Linka, but to hit her and then lie about it?!"

Loki picked Lynn up by his shirt and then balled his hand into a fist, shaking it at the 13-year-old, "Oh, you are literally dead meat!"

Before Loki could throw a punch, Rita and Lynn Sr. walked into the room. Rita asks, "What's going on in here?" This caused Loki to quickly drop Lynn Jr.

Linka rushed over to Lynn Sr. and hugged her father's leg, still crying, "LYNN HIT ME!"

Lynn Sr. picked up Linka and wiped the tears from her eyes, "There, there, Princess. Daddy's here." Lynn Sr. hugged Linka, the young girl crying into her father's shoulder, "LYNN LOUD JR! Have you lost your mind?!"

Rita waved her index finger at Lynn Jr., "I know you boys like to punch one another, but that's no excuse to punch your little sister!"

"But, Mom…"

"No buts!" Rita points out the kitchen, "Now go to your room, young man!"

Lynn Jr stood there in shock for a second or two, and then made his way out the kitchen, cursing under his breath.

Rita asked Linka, "Are you OK, sweetie?"

Linka sniffled, "Yes, mommy."

Lynn Sr. asked, "Is there anything we can do for you, angel?"

Linka thought about it, "Well, he did eat the last Toasty Tart, so…"

Rita put up her right hand, "Say no more." She turns to her eldest sons, "Boys, can you run to store and get more tarts?"

Loki, Luke, and Lane saluted, "Yes, ma'am!"

Loni smiled, "Like, OK!"

As they rushed out the door, Lynn Sr. asked, "Was Loni wearing a dress?"

Half an hour later, Linka was at the table, eating one of the Toasty Tarts from one of the four boxes that she was given. Each was of a different flavor, of course.

Lynn walked into the dining room and asked, "What the heck, Linka?!"

Linka looks to Lynn, "What's up, Lynn?"

"Cut the crud, sis! Why did you lie about me hitting you?!"

Linka pointed her index and middle fingers up, "Two reasons. 1) Because after you hit me yesterday, everyone was waiting on me hand and foot. I'd be an idiot not to take advantage of that. And 2) Because you put an empty box back in the pantry."

"Well, thanks to you, I'm on thin ice! The guys told mom and dad about me hitting you yesterday, and they say if I do it one more time, I'll be grounded!"

Linka heard those words and smiled, "Well, I guess you better be careful, Lynn."

"Why, I oughta…" Linka brought up her fist, looking primed to hit. Above Lynn's head, an equation played out: Fist plus Linka equals Lynn behind a barred window. Lynn promptly switched gears and smiled, "Hug my sweet, beautiful little sister!" He begrudgingly hugs Linka, and then walks away, still smiling.

The next day, Lynn walked into the house, sweaty and tired from his daily run through the neighborhood. As he approaches the bathroom to shower, but then Linka appears behind him, holding her bathrobe and loofah, "Hi, Lynn! You don't mind if I take my 30-minute bubble bath before you get in, right?"

"Oh, come on, sis! I was…" Linka brought up her fist, "Just going to say it's all yours!"

As Linka enters, Lane walks up to Lynn, pinching his nose to avoid the smell, "Hey, Lynn! I'd say smell ya later, but I don't want to! Hahaha!" This resulted in Lane being punched by Lynn.

The next day, Lynn gets his bike out of the garage and begins to ride off, until Linka walks out of the house and asks, "Hey, Lynn, could you give me a bike ride to Claire's?!"

"Come on, Linka! Can't you just…" He sees Linka preparing to punch herself, "Hop on my back pegs, sis! I'll take you there!"

Once in front of Claire's, Linka hops off, "See ya, Lynn!"

As Lynn pedals back the other way, Lexx pulls up in his soldier car, "Hey, Lynn! Still riding that primitive little machine, I see?" Lynn responded by punching Lexx. Lexx then motored off, "MOM! LYNN HIT ME!"

"TATTLETALE!"

The next day, Lynn is watching a baseball game on TV, "Alright. Bottom of the ninth, bases loaded, and Ramirez is up to bat! If he hits this, they win the game!"

Linka shows up, "Hey, Lynn! The season finale of The Dream Boat is about to start. Could I have the TV?"

Lynn begs, "Please, Linka! I'm about to witness history here! Can't you just…" Linka readies herself for the punch, and he stands up from the couch, "Make yourself comfy, sis!" He hands Linka the remote, "It's all yours."

Lynn walks out of the living room and climbs up the stairs. He hears the sound of baseball coming from Loki's room. He sees Loki watching the game on his phone, "Homerun!" Loki notices Lynn, "Man, I feel sorry for anyone who missed this game! Right, Lynn?" Lynn howls in anger, punching the wall outside of the room. As he marches off, Loki says to himself, "He literally needs anger management."

Lynn was in his room, punching away at his punching bag. He huffs and puffs, a look of frustration plastered on his face. Amongst the noise, Lars pokes out of his coffin and asks, "What's wrong with you?"

Lynn sighs, "I'd tell you, but you wouldn't believe me."

"Lynn, I talk to ghosts, cast spells, and believe that vampires are real. Just try me."

"Fine. I'm mad because ever since Linka punched herself and blamed me, she keeps threatening to do it again if I don't give in to her demands."

Lars was silent for a few seconds, but finally spoke up, "You're right. I don't believe you." He lies down and closes the lid to his coffin.

Lynn's expression grew more furious, and he punches his bag again, sending it flying out of his room. He goes to retrieve it and runs into Loni, who looked like he just painted his finger nails and toe nails, "Hey, Lynn! Like, are you OK? You seem stressed."

Lynn picks up his punching bag and throws it back into his room, "I am! Ever since…" Lynn notices Loni's nails, "Dude, did you paint your nails?"

"Uh-huh! Seafoam green!" He flutters his eyes, which now had false eyelashes, "Matches my eyes, don't you think?"

Lynn was furious and shouted at his older brother, "Dude, will you cut it out?! Lane was just messing with you! You're not a girl!"

Loni crosses his arms, "Oh, yeah? Prove it." Lynn responded by kicking Loni in the crotch, making the blonde's eyes almost pop out of his head. As Lynn pulls his foot away, Loni grabs himself, saying in a high-pitched voice, "Owie." He then fell to the ground in pain.

Loki comes across his younger brothers and asked, "What's up with Loni?"

Lynn shrugged, "I kicked him to prove he was a guy."

Loki glared, "Seriously?!" He grabs Lynn by his shirt and pulls the jock in close, "Lynn, there are literally two rules in this house: Never hit Linka, and never kick each other in the groin!"

Loni stands up, still holding himself, "Well, guess I'm off to the mall for boy's clothes." He winces in pain as he walks.

Lane pops up and tells Loni, "If you still are a boy."

Lane laughs, making Loni reply, "Not funny, Lane! Ow-how!"

Lynn calls out, "Sorry, Loni!" Inspiration then hit Lynn, "Sorry I didn't think of this sooner."

An hour later, Lynn walks up to Linka, who was rewatching The Dream Boat season finale. "Hey, sis! Whatcha doing?"

"Just rewatching the season finale. I had to go to the bathroom, and I missed who Carolynn picked."

"That's a shame." He grins, "You know what else is a shame?"

"What?"

"That you'll have to miss it again."

Linka suspiciously looks at Lynn, "Why?"

"Because of this!" Lynn grabbed his crotch and pretended to be in pain, falling to the floor, "OW!"

At the sound of Lynn screaming, the entire family rushed in, Lynn Sr. asking, "What's going on?! Lynn, did you hit your sister again?"

Lynn looks up at his Dad, "Oh, yeah, Dad. That's why I'm down here. I mean…" He pretends to be hurt again, making his voice high-pitched, "I was coming to ask Linka if I could have the TV, but she said no! I begged her, and she kicked me!"

"WHAT?!" Linka stood up, "No, I didn't! He did it to himself!"

Rita questioned this, "Linka, you expect us to believe your brother kicked himself in the groin?"

Linka hesitated, "Uuuuh…"

Lynn Sr. scolded, "I know that Lynn Jr. hit you a few days ago, but that's no excuse to kick him in his tender area!" He points up the stairs, "Now go to your room!"

As she passed by everyone, Leif shook his head, "That's low, sis."

As she takes the first step, she turns around, "But…"

Rita cut her off, "End of discussion, young lady!"

Lynn grinned, knowing his plan had worked.

An hour later, Lynn was watching the highlights from the baseball game when Linka entered the room, "I know what you're doing!"

Lynn shrugged, "What am I doing?"

"You lied about me kicking you, just so you could get the TV!"

"Oh, you mean like how you pretended to get hit so I would do whatever you wanted?"

Linka growled and then glared at her older sibling, "This isn't over, Lynn!"

Lynn glared back, "You're right. It's just the beginning."

The following days, Lynn and Linka kept pretending to get hurt by one another. Lynn got mad when Linka finished off the rest of the cereal, so he pretended to get kicked in order to get the bowl, only for Linka to punch herself. Their parents enter the room but were split on whose side to take. The next day, Linka was in her room, dancing to boy band music when Lynn came in to ask her to turn it down. She pretended to get hit, only for Lynn to pretended she kicked him again. Their siblings saw this and looked quite confused about the situation. Finally, Linka and Lynn were ironically fighting over the last Toasty Tart, both grabbing it and trying to pull it away from one another. They both dropped it and proceeded to fake getting hit or kicked, respectively.

The family came in, seeing the situation. Lynn Sr. rubs his chin, "Something funny's going on around here."

The next day, Lynn and Linka came out of their rooms, glaring at each other. Lynn told Linka, "It's Sunday. The Tigers are playing against the Orioles tonight."

Linka responded, "Well, there's a rerun of the season finale of Dream Boat, and I'm not missing it again."

"Well, I'm not missing my game!"

Both of them rush downstairs, pushing and shoving on their way down. They both grab the remote and fight over it. After a couple seconds, they both yell out in pain, faking their respective injuries.

The family comes into the room, looking at Linka and Lynn with unimpressed eyes. Before Linka and Lynn could say their usual excuse, Lynn Sr. cuts them off, "Let me guess. Lynn Jr., Linka kicked you, and Linka, Lynn Jr. punched you?"

Both were silent after that, but then answered, "Yes?"

Rita grabs the remote from them, "You mean, just like the other times you both hit each other?!" She turned on the TV, which was showing a montage of videos of Linka and Lynn Jr. faking getting hit by each other.

Lynn Jr. and Linka stood up, looking quite shocked, "What the?!"

Levi explained, "You can thank the cameras I installed for this."

Lane added, "There's comedy gold happening all the time around here, so I convinced Levi to install some all over the house!"

Linka asked, looking a bit disturbed, "Even in the bathroom?"

Levi hesitated, "Nooooo." He nervously smiles, his eyes darting back and forth.

Rita crossed her arms, "I can't believe you kids! Hitting each other is one thing, but lying?"

Linka and Lynn Jr. stammered, trying to defend their side, until Lynn Sr. shouted, "Enough! You both march up to your rooms! Your mother and I will be up there to punish you both later."

Both made their way upstairs, their siblings shaking their heads in a disapproving manner.

An hour later, Linka was lying on her bed, looking at the ceiling. She held Bun-Bun close to her chest, a scowl on her face. There was a knock on her door, "Who is it?"

Lynn entered, "Hey, sis."

Linka sat up, "What do you want?"

Lynn sat on the bed and told Linka, "I just wanted to say… I'm sorry."

Linka scoffed, "No, it's not! This is all your faul…" She stopped when she realized what he actually said, "Say what?"

"I'm sorry, OK." He sighs, "I shouldn't have pretended you were kicking me in the groin. That was wrong, and I really am sorry."

Linka sighed, looking just as guilty as her brother, "No, Lynn. I'm sorry. I shouldn't have pretended you hit me in the first place."

"Well, why did you?"

"After you did it the first time, everyone pampered me the whole day, and it was kind of nice." She shrugged, "I just wanted to have that feeling again, but I went about it the wrong way. Now we're both grounded because of me."

Lynn added, "Well, I didn't exactly help." Lynn huffed, "Look, we both know I'm not used to the whole apology thing. What do we do next?"

Linka smiled, "This." She hugs Lynn, who hugged back. As they broke the hug, Linka asked, "But, maybe you could cut back on the punching a bit? Lexx's arm has got a pretty big bruise because of it."

Lynn nodded, "Sure thing, sis. And, hey! There is one thing I can do that won't hurt anyone."

"What's that?"

Lynn pulls Linka's cover over their heads and proceeds to fart, "DUTCH OVEN!"

Linka pops her head out, coughing and gagging. She tells the viewer, "Well, it beats getting hit!"