"Because I need you, ok?"
Five words. He'd spent so long hiding the fact, a carefully constructed facade that he had destroyed in the space of a second. The second she'd said she was leaving. If he couldn't tell her before, he had to now. It was that or lose her forever.
Evan and Alison had been friends since they'd both been working the indy scene, their paths often crossing as they moved on in their careers, until both had ended up on Raw. Since that day they were often to be found together; mutual interests, a shared sense of humour, and an unspoken attraction that was never acted on, keeping them together. Until it all got too much for Alison, and she decided to leave. The day she told Evan that she was quitting changed everything between them.
Alison had developed a thick skin working in wrestling for as long as she had. It was the only way to survive. She'd been propositioned by more people than she could remember, had put up with gropes and touches from people who should have known better or just didn't care. It was all part of the job and was something that she put up with, although each time a hand caressed her shoulder she cringed and a little bit more of her died inside. She always declined the offers though, no matter who they were from. Yes it had cost her dearly in terms of her career, but her pride and self esteem were more important. If she got to the top, she wanted it to be on her own terms.
She remembered the first time a booker had offered her a spot in terms for favours. She'd not been naïve, she'd known that was how things worked, but she'd still shook her head and politely declined. She eventually gained the spot on her own terms, but it had taken far longer than it would have done had she just acquiesced. The only thing that kept her going was the friendship she had formed with Evan. Where other wrestlers had told her to make things easier for herself, he had backed her up each and every time, supporting her decisions.
They'd celebrated when she finally made it on her own terms. The WWE call up had been a surprise, and Evan had warned her what things would be like but it was her lifelong dream and there was no way she'd give up now, but it had turned out harder than she ever could have imagined.
She sat on the bed in her hotel room, ignoring the banging on the door from a certain wrestler who felt that persistence would get him what he wanted. Tears streamed down her cheeks. She'd been with WWE for three months and every day was like her own personal hell. It wasn't just the bookers, it was other wrestlers who viewed divas as pieces of meat to be shared around and the fact that everyone accepted that, even the divas themselves, shocked her beyond anything she had experienced before. Fighting and keeping your beliefs was one thing, doing it alone was something else, and something she didn't think she could do any more.
She barely registered the shouting outside her room, or that the banging had stopped, or someone quietly talking to housekeeping, or even the click of a keycard opening her door. The only thing that did register was strong arms around her, pulling her into the embrace that she so desperately needed, from the only person she still trusted.
Evan held her close to him, feeling tremors and sobs wracking her body. He had seen how difficult things were for her, but had no idea that she had been this close to falling apart. He felt her arms around him, her body silently begging him never to let go. Gently stroking her hair, he mumbled comforting words, feeling like he should have noticed sooner, should have stopped this. He hated seeing her like this. His strong Alison, his rock, should not be broken.
Eventually Evan realised that Alison had become still and softly he brushed her hair away from her face, seeking reassurance. She rested her head on his shoulder and looked up at him sadly. She hadn't wanted him to see her like this, not when she knew how much he relied on her, needed her.
"Hey," he whispered, one thumb brushing away tears that were still drying on her cheek.
She took a deep breath and sat up, moving away from her comforter and leaning back against the headboard, hands on her knees. Trying to remain composed, she looked at him carefully.
"Thank you."
He forced a smile, "wanna talk about it?" He wasn't surprised when she shook her head. "You can't carry on like this darling."
"I've got through worse," she shrugged, "but I'm not sure how much more I can take."
Evan didn't know what to say to that, because he didn't have the answers. She was fighting against the culture of an entire business, she always had, and he was scared that one day she would stop fighting and he knew that would truly destroy her, and then he would lose her for good.
They hadn't talked about it for a few days, Alison seemingly wanting to pretend that it had never happened. On the surface things were normal but Evan knew there was something in her heart that had broken and he wasn't sure things would ever be normal again.
Then the bombshell came.
They were sat in Alison's hotel room, when she just came out with it. Two words that struck out of the blue.
"I'm leaving."
Evan looked up in shock. This wasn't his Alison, she wouldn't give up so easily. "You... you can't." He stood up and moved to kneel in front of her. "Ali, don't let them win."
"It's not a battle I'm willing to have," she sighed, "Ev, I've fought and fought to get here, I don't think I can do this any more, not on my own."
"But..." Evan shook his head, "you're better than this, you can't give up now, not when you're so close to your dream."
"No," Alison's temper flared, "this is not my dream. My dream was to be the best female wrestler, not to be molested in every locker room, not to be always on my guard because I never know who's going to have wandering hands and trying to cop a feel. I can't carry on like this because they're beating me down and I'd rather quit than give in to them."
"I understand," Evan began, but Alison cut him off.
"You can't possibly understand, because it's not you who's facing this. Things are so much easier for you Ev, and I know you care and you understand me but you can't understand the situation I'm in and because of that you can't truly understand why I need to leave."
"Please." Evan took Alison's hands in his own, resting them in Alison's lap, "please don't leave."
"Why?"
He looked down at their entwined hands, "because I need you, ok?"
The silence was deafening. They'd been best friends for so long. Alison had sometimes wondered if there could ever be something more between them, but she'd thought that they were better as friends. It worried her, could she risk the one thing she had left?
Evan had taken the plunge now, so he continued, "I've been in love with you for longer than I can say. I was so happy when you got this job because it meant we could spend time together and I was happy with that, and I could take just being friends because at least you were here with me, but now to hear you wanting to give up I can't let you do that without you knowing how I feel about you. I need you in my life, I want to make you happy and I need you because you keep me sane and you stop all the shit from getting me down. If you still decide to leave then I will respect that and support you but I need you to know that I love you."
Alison stopped his words by pressing her lips to his. The kiss was awkward, gentle, and breathtaking. She eventually pulled away, sitting back and smiling shyly. A slight blush had crossed Evan's cheeks and he was staring at her with a slightly dazed but nervous look in his eyes.
She had to make a decision. Being with Evan wouldn't solve her problems, wouldn't prevent all the difficulties, but would it make them easier to handle? Would it get her through the worst of times? She didn't know, but was she willing to give him a chance? Could she give in to the feelings she'd tried to suppress for many years? Could she be what he needed, and could he give her the love and protection she craved?
She leaned forward and kissed him again. With his arms wrapped around her and his lips caressing hers, she felt like she could overcome any obstacle. She felt alive.
This time it was Evan who broke the kiss, "you'll stay?" he whispered.
"I'll stay with you," she replied. "I can't promise I'll stay in WWE, but I'm willing to give us a go."
It was more than he'd dreamed of and everything he'd hoped. He nodded and held her tightly, a silent prayer in his heart that he would be good enough for her.