Loyal to Your Nightmare

by Penguita38

For as long as Zero could remember, he had felt something deep inside of him claw in dark desperation for freedom. What he thought was a constant nightmare, quickly became a reality when he met Kaname. Vampire Kaname/Human Zero. K/Z. AU. One-shot.

Hello, peeps. Evening, actually. I know, I know, fancy seeing me here right now. I am still working on Unholy Rebirth and nearly have the next chapter (and many more, which is great, because there is so much awesome coming in those chapters) done. But this fic was something I'd actually started about two years ago. I have various other projects written that probably will never see the light of day, but it's always exciting when my muse steers off back to one of them and I can finish it. I don't like to post things when I am unsure of the entire story flow, cause I don't like to put a story up I may not finish, so this story just kept growing into a massive, giant one-shot. I suppose I could have broken it up, but where is the fun in that? Ha! So, it just got longer and longer...

Sit down, get a cup of coffee (or smoothie) and enjoy all 39 pages (you read that right) of an insanely long one-shot. I may expand on it and write a follow-up eventually, but nothing this long, or in the super near future.

Important Disclaimer: This is AU. Completely and utterly made up from the original version. This is more of your true twist to vampires, but with my own added flair, and some of the VK myths and legends. The rules were changed for the betterment of this little story's plot. And as such, characters may seem OOC a tad, but I tried to keep them somewhat true to their lovely forms. Zero will have angst, but near to the "I've become a vampire against my will" levels of the manga.

I don't own VK and never will. It's just fun to borrow them. And all errors are mine (which I'm sure there are plenty, since I tend to write like a vampire in the wee hours of the night).

Enjoy.

Loyal to Your Nightmare

"Do you think Ichiru did this on purpose, Z?" his boyfriend yelled so loud his voice strained. "Your brother is evil."

A playful smirk curled into place and he tilted his head. He blew a large breath into his silver bangs. "And they always thought I was the evil twin, Akatsuki."

Kain leaned into him and nudged him. "Perhaps you could lay off the black a little and perhaps your dad will think you've dropped your Satanic-witch-praying-worshiping ways. And scoring us all fake I.D.'s to get into the club. That's also on the nefarious list of things your dad would probably kill you for"

He laughed a little, flashing a set of straight white teeth toward his boyfriend. "Maybe the eyeliner was a bit much this time."

Kain rubbed his thumb under the edge of Zero's eye, smoothing out the black caked makeup. His boyfriend's touch was soft, caring. The loud thump of the music that reverberated their bodies seemed to stop as they locked eyes. The blue and purple lights from the ceiling dimmed as their focus became only them. Even the glitter shower that was being thrown by the dancing teens on the second floor ceased.

Kain took a slow breath inward. His throat quivered. "I think it brings out your eyes, really. They shimmer kind of a silver, violet next to the black."

His gaze dropped to his drink, which was some kind of blue, fruity (definitely gay) concoction his boyfriend ordered him. He wasn't usually the dainty type—that was more Kain's role—and he'd have preferred a beer, but he didn't want to hurt Kain's feelings, so he continued to nurse the same tripped out pineapple, watered down vodka beverage until it was gone.

These moments always made him feel awkward. His hands trembled slightly at the hand that covered his own. The frosted blue glass countertop illuminated their intertwined fingers. Blood rushed to his face at the contact. It was hard to tell Kain that they needed a break. They had only been dating for a few months, but it was too much—too much pressure to do right by Kain. Heaven knows he always fucked up every relationship he was in.

He looked up through silver strands into the vulnerable green of his boyfriend's. "Akatsuki…" he started, already hating the defeated tone of his voice. "I—we—shit. I need a beer. I can't handle this drink." It was kind of his way of saying 'them' but he couldn't force the words out.

"I'll get you a beer, Z. I should've known that something called the Fuzzy Island Dream wouldn't be something you'd have ordered."

The empty barstool before him allowed his heart to slow down to normal, non-heart failure speeds. He watched Kain disappear in the crowd and head for the back bar—the more crowded one, which would buy him at least fifteen minutes to figure out how he was going to break up with the red-head. He released a heavy sigh and took a sip of his blue Fuzzy Island. God, the thing tasted terrible.

His black combat boots thudded against the sterile white floor. He looked completely out of place in the modern joint. His black tattoos were like plagued curses to the pristine poppy teens that passed, especially the visible one on his neck. His black leather jacket had more unnecessary safety pings clipped on than a broken bra strap. His tight fitting black—he stopped his mind from continuing the mental breakdown of his attire.

He really did wear too much black. He rolled his eyes when he moved his legs and looked down at the snug black jeans he fashioned. He supposed his attire matched his inner mood, since he always felt more comfortable shrouded in darkness.

He took another fake sip of his pansy beverage. "Yep," he said to no one in particular, "I need Jesus."

His mirror self slapped his shoulder and beamed an overly enthusiastic smile—pearly whites and all. "Zero!" he yelled over the music. "Brother." Ichiru lifted a slow, pleading brow. "My only brother, mind you."

He narrowed his eyes at his twin. "What do you want?"

Ichiru, his twin—complete opposite twin, as in he adorned a nice white button up, blue jeans, liked woman, and wore a smile that actually said, 'I care about your problems'—picked up the blue drink and took a sip.

"Geez, Zero." Ichiru cringed. "Even this is a bit too gay for you."

He waved his twin on. "What do you want, Ichiru? Do we finally get to leave this hell?"

Ichiru's smile pulled to the left in an awkward manner and his eyes grew unsure. "Well… I know I promised you and Akatsuki a ride home, but you see, there are these twins—and I would totally have invited you into the mix if you liked, well, girls, but since you don't, I will have to make the sacrifice myself and just go in solo. That being said, your two spots—"

He held up his hand to stop his twin from going on further. "I get it, Ich. Go and get laid with the twins. It's your birthday, after all."

"Zero," it sounded like a whine. "I owe you big time. Thank you." Ichiru came over and hugged him, his grip slapping against the leather and safety pins and then pulled him into a tight squeeze. "Happy birthday to you, too, Zero."

By the time he straighten out his jacket, his twin was gone. He didn't even want to be at the club, but it was Ichiru's favorite spot, so he came. And then he was going to use the overly bright, techno-laced club to break up with his overly sweet, fruity drink-buying boyfriend. That didn't happen either. The night didn't seem to be in his favor.

He spotted Kain by the bar, barking his drink order by using some foreign looking sign language and it appeared to be an unsuccessful line of communication, because he was still there throwing the symbols around at the bartender, who seemed to be ignoring his redheaded soon to be ex.

The lights from above were overly blue (to the point it was probably teal) and pink, and the rain of glitter fell in a continued sparkly drizzle from the second floor. The music beat against his body in long, bass whipping thumps. He didn't mind whatever song was playing now—but he'd never admit it. The teens in the center of the floor covered every inch to the point of near suffocation, each one grinding and riding the nearest warm body next to them. Half didn't wear hardly any clothes, and the other half wore them so tight it was like they were nude anyway. And so many neon colors danced across his vision. The 80's must have made a comeback, but he barely noticed anything outside of his black with a dash of a red wardrobe.

He stuck out like a black dot against a white canvas. And then there he stood—the guy in the center who seemed to be walking through the crowd with ease. The man had curly brown hair that fell to his shoulders in soft waves, as if the neon lighting didn't falter the sheen at all. And he wore a dark jacket, near black (maybe navy) that carried down to his knees, but matched the dark denim that was tight against his thighs. Beneath the dark coat, a flash of white popped through, but it didn't seem overbearing. No, it suited the stranger.

The dancing teens didn't hinder his path through the crowd. The heavy-laden thumps of the trance music seemed to match the stranger's stride as he made his way through the dance floor. Their eyes were locked the entire way. There was something alluring about the stranger—intoxicating—something dark, and he craved that like a junkie to his next fix.

The man stood in front of him and nearly towered over him, as he sat, frozen to the bar stool, looking up at the near perfect brown hair that slide forward over the stranger's jaw. The man tilted his head, as if he was examining him.

He lifted a questioning brow to the man. "Can I help you?"

Then the stranger smiled—the kind of heart melting smile only seen in movies, one that radiated charm. "For your birthday," the man said, as he drew his hand from his back and offered him the bottle.

He cocked his head to the side, bewildered, but accepted the dewed bottle with a nod of appreciation. "Thanks."

"I overheard your boyfriend up at the bar growl out something about just needing a beer for your birthday. And something about how fruity drinks were going on a list of things to never buy. He kept starting this way, so I assumed it was you, as you're the only person sitting out here in the back of the club."

He took a sip of the beer and processed everything the stranger just told him. "Right…" he said slowly.

That damn enchanting smile was back. "Sorry. I guess it was rather rude of me to go behind your boyfriend's back."

His bangs dangled into view and he licked his lips. "No, no. Don't. I was about to toss out the blue frilly drink anyway and needed this." He took another swig from the bottle. "This is perfect." The cold liquid cooled his dry throat.

"Kaname," the man said. "That's my name. I've been watching you from the balcony and you looked a little bored."

"Ah, you have the creepy stalker speech down, Kaname." The look in Kaname's eyes didn't dissuade the statement at all, and frankly it sent a chill down his spine when their eyes locked. The smile Kaname wore curled upward some, into more of a mischievous grin.

Kaname's expression turned apologetic. "Zero, I don't want this conversation to turn into anything other than friendly."

He stood up, beer in hand, and took a step back. "I didn't give you my name, Kaname."

Kaname matched his height in a flash, and he was only a few inches taller than him but it felt like two feet. The brunette put a hand to his heart and slipped the thought-wiping charm back on his face.

"I overheard your boyfriend at the bar."

He took another three steps back until he collided with the wall. The lighting in the back of the club was bleak and dark—the neon overheads didn't reach that far. They were shrouded in a cloak of shadows. The man, Kaname, put an arm forward, palm down, to the wall next to his head.

He steadied his stare and hardened his expression, his eyes narrowing at the stranger. "Hate to disappoint you, psycho, but Akatsuki never calls me by my full name." He shoved at the man's chest. "Now back off."

Kaname was like a rock, unmoving. His eyes widened and he snapped his gaze up in surprise. "Move," he repeated.

Kaname closed his eyes, like he was saying a prayer. All crazy people probably pray before they are about to kill their prey—or even rape them. He was probably going to end up some statistic on his birthday. Perfect.

A cold hand rose to his lips, the fingers soft as they caressed the edges of his lips. Kaname leaned forward, his breath centimeters from his mouth. He knew he must have hit some panic mode in his brain, because he inhaled in the sweet scent of the man, and clung to the aroma that smelled oddly like warm apples. He knew this smell, from some part of his brain, and it soothed him. The chest that was pressed up against his body felt strangely right, as well, as if he was the right puzzle to fill that empty space that had lingered for so many years.

"I do not want to hurt you, Zero," said Kaname. And there was a hint of sincerity in the stranger's voice that made him want to believe it was the truth. "Would you feel better if I said we have the same class at university."

His voice shook. "Would it be a lie?"

A dangerous glint flickered across the man's eyes. "Do you want it to be? Do you want to dance with something a little more perilous than prissy blue cocktails?"

He did. He had been sitting in the club all night hoping that someone would come and scoop him up and thrust him into something more than neon colors and poppy teen music. And here was the answer. A man—Kaname—who may or may not be someone he had a class with.

He breathed in Kaname's fragrance one more time. The stranger's skin was so cold against his, but the aura and scent warmed him like hot cider on a cold day. And maybe he was caught in the allure of mystery, or the guy had slipped something in his beer that made him lapse in judgment, but the small space that existed disappeared and he had initiated it.

The kiss grew in intensity the moment they collided. His fingers curled around the lapel of the stranger's jacket and he jerked him closer. He tasted that warm spice he had envisioned when their tongues met. And it wasn't an innocent schoolgirls kiss—no, he plunged head on into the art of making out with this stranger. His legs wobbled for a fraction before he slid one forward, between Kaname's knees. The man was hard, but he was just as guilty. The stranger slipped his free hand toward the edge of his shirt, slipping nimble fingers beneath the fabric. He gasped, momentarily parting from the kiss, as the ice-cold hand pressed to his stomach slowly slid across his belly.

A part of his brain registered that Kain would probably walk back and find him entangled in the man's arms, making out with him like some hooker to the next dollar. But rationale all vanished the moment his was in the man's arm. It was like a spell was cast over them and he was entranced instantly.

Kaname's left palm cupped the back of his neck and drew him nearer. He nibbled at Kaname's lips as the kiss died down to slow caresses. But Kaname didn't stay on the approved trail, and veered off to the side of his mouth, and then down his jaw, to his neck, and continued to kiss and suck on the curved skin where his neck and shoulder met. He pushed up into Kaname, as a signal that whatever magical madness his mouth was doing felt damn good. Kaname's hand moved up further, to his nipple, and he moaned.

He looped his fingers in Kaname's belt loop, using it as leverage to pull the man closer to him until their hips touched. Kaname's tongue continued a wet trail down his neck, scraping his teeth against his skin.

Then most unexpected sensation happened—pain. Fierce, blinding pain, too, like someone had stabbed his neck with a hot poker, deep into his muscles. It debilitated him, froze him for a moment as his senses went haywire to try and battle the sudden onslaught of agony.

As quickly as it came, it vanished. His vision blurred and he thought Kaname's signature smile was back, but there was definitely a darker edge to the expression now. And it was dark, but the man's lips were definitely redder than when they met.

Everything sped up like a movie and the sounds and sensations crushed into his skull. He staggered forward. Kaname caught him.

"What the fuck? I don't think we had a safe word in play and you definitely didn't tell me you were a biting psycho." He reached up and cupped his neck.

"Sorry," said Kaname, but it didn't sound sincere. "I couldn't help it. You were a little too tempting. I should have anticipated that."

He looked up at Kaname, perplexed. "I don't know what kind of stuff you took before you came in, but I swear to god you better not have given me any kind of disease." His hand came away and even in the darkness he could see his palm was smeared with blood. "Oh, perfect, I'm bleeding."

Strength returned and he found enough in him to shove Kaname away. "I think we're done here, Kaname."

"Oh, we're far from done now, Zero. I'll definitely be on your mind now."

He spread his fingers out and moved them to the lit hallway light to his right. Yep, definitely blood. When he turned around, Kaname was gone.

"Great, I always attract the nutcases. Perfect. I should definitely start wearing pink."

"God, what happened to your hand?" said Kain, appearing from beside the vacant bar with a wet bottle of beer.

"My neck," he corrected and took the beer with a half smile. "And thank you." He didn't hold back and he downed the entire bottle of beer in a few gulps. He needed another one. He kept his right hand to his neck and put pressure on the wound. "It's nothing. I just tripped back here in the dark."

He watched his boyfriend's face, to gauge whether or not he had seen his whore-like macabre scene on display. But there was no anger in Akatsuki's face. He knew guilt should have been the first emotion that rolled through him, but he couldn't help the lingering thrill caused by the man's body pressed to his, or the way his heart sped up when that man had kissed him, until the crazy stranger ruined it all by going Hannibal Lecter on his neck.

Kain eyed him suspiciously. "Okay… Are you ready to leave? I ran into your brother and heard all about the twins, change of a lifetime, blah, blah. I found us a ride. I ran into Senri and Ruka at the bar."

"The faster the better. Let's go," he said, discarding of the empty beer bottle on the bar counter.

Outside, he met a few of Kain's friends. He felt unsteady and hot. They probably all thought he had too many to drink, but he knew that wasn't the case. He drank one beer and had a few sips of the other one.

He dusted off his leather jacket and let the cold breeze roll over his neck and exposed skin. A fire burnt inside his veins, causing his heart to quicken and his vision to blur.

"Zero," said a friend of Kain. He thought her name was Ruka, if he remembered correctly. "You don't look so good."

"Oh God," whispered Kain, and then a strong hand was on his arm. "I think I poisoned him with that fruity vodka."

"I'm s'kay." He coked his head to the side. Had he just slurred that all?

The fire grew to fascinating heat, like it was alive. Something stirred inside him. And it excited him. The darkness he saw in the stranger was surely aflame in his fiery stare. The little group of people looked so fragile. He could trace their blood pumping beneath their veins, and he swore he could hear it swooshing through their bodies, feeding their hearts, warming their skin, tempting him to taste—.

Shock jolted him into reality and he slapped a hand over his mouth.

"Yep, he's going to throw up," another member of the group bellowed.

"Z, let's get you home and get the blood off of your neck," said Kain, his hold on Zero's arm still tight.

No one ushered a word on the ride home. He knew it was probably because they were terrified that if they did, he'd vomit all over the seats. And Ruka drove a really nice car.

The entire time he imagined his teeth nibbling at their jugulars, just a tiny bit, not enough to hurt them, but enough to raise the blood forward so he could smell it…maybe lick it.

And then darkness consumed him. He remembered the dark from his childhood. A voice, he recalled.

The darkness will find you. It always knows where you are. It wants you.

He snapped up in a moment of panic, his hands immediately grabbing the blinds as a knee-jerk reaction. Light flooded his dorm room—bright, white and hot light poured into the room like a neon bulb with a 900-WATT intensity. He hissed (he heard it clear as day and he really had hissed) and slammed the blinds back against the window.

"Son-of-a-bitch that hurts," he whispered.

He pinched the bridge of his nose and inhaled a slow breath. No hangover—good. No shirt—strange. Pants on—phew. He looked around his dorm for any sign of his boyfriend, but Kain wasn't there. Even if it wasn't Kain's dorm room, as he shared his with Ichiru, he was surprised to see he had left after all the chaos from last night.

He eyed the clock with a venomous glare. He had a glass starting in twenty minutes.

Dressed in a red t-shirt and (shockingly enough) a pair of blue jeans—but not denying the badass-ery of his leather jacket—he headed to his Literature class.

He made it to class with minutes to spare. He rubbed his eyes lightly and smeared the black eyeliner into a (hopefully) more unified streak. He slid out his copy of Heart of Darkness and opened the book to his bookmarked location. The words in front of him popped out as if they were the only ones visible:

"…it is written I should be loyal to the nightmare of my choice."

"Nightmare." He let he word dance across his lips. He rubbed the side of his neck and groaned. He left in such a hurry that he hadn't even checked to see if the blood was still there. He knew it'd sound crazy, but maybe he could ask his neighbor if he got pen on his neck. Yes, solid plan. If they screamed, then he knew he walked into class macabre ready and certifiably insane.

"So…" he started as he turned and then stopped. He froze as he locked eyes with the browned eyed bitter from the club last night. "You," he said, vehement clear in his tone.

Kaname waved and grinned at the response. "Do you have the notes from last lecture?"

He gathered his books and made a move to stand, but a quick hand clamped onto his forearm and Kaname barked out in a low growl for him to, "Sit."

"I told you I wouldn't hurt you, Zero," he repeated the words from the club, which held no promise as he clearly had already hurt him when he bit him.

He clenched his teeth and set his jaw tight, his eyes narrow as he warned Kaname with silent words to "back off".

"Glad you're all still alive after the weekend," the professor started. She took the remote and dimmed the lights. The only light now came from the projector, where she used her pointer to highlight some of the poignant passages from the book.

"Don't you dare come near me again, Kaname," he whispered, low enough to ensure only Kaname heard him, as to not disrupt class.

"I think you'll find it near impossible to avoid one another." Kaname stifled a chuckle. "After all, we have the same class together." But he knew the inflection in the man's tone had nothing to do with being in school together.

The teacher called out a passage that resonated with him hard:

"He struggled with himself, too. I saw it - I heard it. I saw the inconceivable mystery of a soul that knew no restraint, no faith, and no fear, yet struggling blindly with itself," the professor said.

His soul ached at the words. The struggle he felt as something unknown closed in on him in his dreams. A darkness—

"The darkness wants me," he whispered. His eyes widened when he realized he had said it out loud.

Kaname's expression was unimpressed, passive, but there was a hint of possessiveness to it that thrilled him, yet rationality told him he should be fearful of that kind of exotic lust.

"Perhaps the darkness has already found you," Kaname answered, his voice flat.

A cold chill spread over his bones and deep into his stomach. He knew the words to be true—the darkness had found him. It was inside him now.

He did well to ignore Kaname the rest of the class and as soon as the instructor dismissed them, he bolted out of his seat and down the hall to his dorm and into his bed.

He couldn't shake what had transpired more than he could the feeling inside that he was dying, slowly, and something was consuming the light that made him…him—made him human. It sounded crazy to have those absurd thoughts, but it was a feeling more than a coherent thought.

His phone rang and he looked at the caller ID and let out a groan. "Ka—I mean Father—."

Kaien cut him off. "I heard about your night from your brother, who told me all about his night. Were you hurt or maimed in anyway by that tween-filled nightmare, my little Zero?"

"I think Cyndi Lauper made an appearance with all the neon I was surrounded by, and nearly caused me to have mild-time-travelling paranoia, but other than that I'm fine."

There was a pause on the other line. A few more seconds passed before Cross continued, "Are you sure?"

He felt compelled to tell his adopted father everything about the night, but something inside him rebelled and hushed his mental mutiny. "Did the adoption agency ever tell you about our pasts? I mean, from before my parents' crash?"

Another pregnant pause. "No." The answer was short—too short. A lie.

"Were we in any kind of danger?"

"Why are you saying this, Zero?"

"No reason… I just wondered." Do it. Tell him. At least mention the dreams. He sighed, a heavy sigh as he contemplated his next words. "I've had dreams where I feel there is something after me—some kind of darkness."

The tremors in his father's voice told him everything he needed to know. "They were just dreams, Zero. Nothing but nightmares."

His expression fell as the lie rolled off Cross' tongue.

"Nightmares," he repeated.

"Zero, why don't you come home for dinner tonight?"

He let out a large breath. "Okay… I'll text Ichiru."

"Good. I'd like to see you both, and Yagari would, too."

He hung up the phone, the eerie sensation only stronger now, and sent off a quick text to his brother before pocketing the device.

His parents died when he was only four—a car crash. Both he and Ichiru were in the car the night they went off the road. He remembered the screams and the fire and the snow, and he remembered the shadows in the road before the car spun out of control. There had been lots of red and cries for help. Ichiru's arm was trapped and he tugged and tugged so hard he heard the bone snap and his brother screamed out. But he had been freed. He watched his mirror self climb out of the car and into the soft snow. The heat grew heavier and dots danced in his vision. His mom and dad were on fire now. He could smell them burning. His legs were stuck. But cold arms grabbed him, scooped him up like a little doll and cradled him to his chest. It was dark, so dark, and the chill around him wrapped around him possessively like it…needed him.

The dorm room door slammed shut and he popped up to see Kain coming into the room.

"Hey," Kain said, distant. "We need to talk."

"Sure," he agreed.

Kain sat next to him on the bed. The redhead reached up and brushed his fingers down his neck. "Uh, you don't even have a scratch or cut there. Maybe you cut somewhere in your hairline. I could have sworn I saw two little nicks when I cleaned your neck last night."

A normal reaction would have been to agree, but his hand immediately flew up to his neck and he slapped his palm down so hard it stung. The skin was smooth, flawless, as if nothing had happened. He was sure… Had he imagined it? No, Kain was shocked too, so there had to have been blood…

"Anyway," Kain continued, not phased by the discovery. "This isn't easy, Z, but I think it's the best. I like you. A lot. But I am not sure it's best if we go forward any further. I think you and I need to take a break."

OH! Oh! He was breaking up with him. It relieved him that he didn't have to have that conversation, but at the same time…a sad pang slithered through his heart. He felt if he lost this normal part of his life, this good, then whatever evil had entered his veins would consume him completely.

"Why?" he found himself saying without honestly thinking it through.

"I think I found someone else, Z. And you're amazing. So, so amazing, and I want us to be friends—."

He stopped Kain from continuing and pulled his soon-to-be-ex into a slow, deliberate kiss. The skin beneath his lips was soft, but it also had the hint of strawberry, like lips gloss. He slid his tongue into Kain's mouth and explored further. The taste was there, too. He licked at the corner of the redhead's mouth and was greeted with the same fruity tang. He pulled away and pressed his head to Kain's, cupping the back of the redhead's neck with his palm.

"I hope you and Ruka are happy," he whispered.

He anticipated the shocked reaction and the blush from his ex. "How?"

"You taste like Strawberry Shortcake's sister, and Ruka's the only one who applies that much lip gloss on every two seconds."

"So the kiss…?"

"Was real," he said. "But I just suspected. And I'm not mad at all, Kain. Honestly, I'm happy for you two. And it's good to know you play for both teams." He tapped his ex playfully on the arm.

"She's just…perfect," Kain whispered with a smile—a genuine smile that caused the redhead's eyes to sparkle with joy. He was glad he witnessed that outcome for Kain.

The light and happiness that lingered became overshadowed with a blackness that crept from the ceiling and oozed down the walls. His eyes flickered around in a flurry of fear. Did Kain not see it? The shadows that formed?

"Ruka is waiting for me at the café commons, so I'm going to head out. I'm glad we were able to remain friends, Zero." Kain used his real name for the first time since they met, and he would have felt bothered by it except his vision was suddenly hyper focused on his ex's neck. The drum of the pulse beneath evened out into a hypnotic rhythm that fascinated him and called to him.

His breathing grew heavy. He leaned forward, gripped his bed sheet and rocked forward and then back. He fought against the ache—the darkness. The dark that had claimed him—just as someone in his past had predicted would happen.

Run, Kain, he thought. Go. There's something inside me that wants to devour you.

A concerned voice called out to him, "Zero," they said. "Zero, are you okay? You look pale."

But the sound of the blood rushed into his ears and it was the only noise he cared about anymore.

Thump

Thump

Thump

It called to him. Kain's heart sang a melody so sweet it needed to cease so no one else could hear it but him. He would end it. He would devour it.

Something in his mouth stung, like a needle prick to his finger.

"Zero?" the voice said again. "I'm going to call your brother—."

"No, leave him alone. Let him breathe," another voice interjected. "Let me see." The bed moved but he couldn't look up at whomever was there. His eyes burned. "Zero, don't look at me, but trust me."

Kaname, his mind registered. The voice belonged to Kaname. But he couldn't hear his heart like he did Kain's. He needed the man to move so he could stop the beating—just stop it so it was quiet! His head pounded with the constant drumming of the redhead's heartbeat.

Something entered his mouth, and it was warm and rich and tasted like copper. Heaven burst open on his lips and he sucked with a hunger he had never felt in his life. His chest heaved and his breath stuttered. The liquid drops that were fed to him were few, but they satisfied the darkness inside enough that it retreated back into the pit of his mind.

"Slowly look up at me, Zero," Kaname instructed.

He did but his eyes remained closed.

"Now open your eyes. Again, slowly."

And he listened again. He was greeted with a relieved expression on Kaname's face, which meant that the demon in him must have subsided.

"Good." Kaname turned to Kain. "He was just having a mild panic attack. He's okay now, as you can see."

Kain's bewildered face drew nearer. "Zero, are you okay?"

Z, he thought. You used to call me, Z. "I'm fine, Akatsuki. This is Kaname, and Kaname that is Kain Akatsuki." He looked at his ex. "Kaname and I have Literature together."

Kain's mystified countenance never wavered, which meant he knew there was more to the story than what was being told. "I'll leave you two. Call me later, Z."

The simplest things brought relief, and hearing Kain call him by his nickname was one of them. But then he had to face Kaname—and he had to face whatever the hell just happened.

The door clicked closed and they were alone.

Avoidance could be a great scapegoat to the situation. "I have to go my father's for dinner. My brother is meeting me there," he said.

Kaname matched everything he did: when he stood, when he took a step towards the door, when he paused.

Anger rose. "I'm not in the mood for this."

"You're a danger to everyone if you walk out of the door right now, Zero," Kaname warned.

"A danger? A danger! You were the psycho that bit me, remember?" he yelled.

"A mistake, which I clearly said before," Kaname admitted. "It wasn't supposed to happen. You weren't supposed to be there, alone, just sitting for anything to snatch you up."

He threw Kaname a stunned look. "What do you mean 'anything to snatch me up'?"

"Evil, Zero." Kaname ran his hands through his hair and huffed out an aggravated breath. "You're like a magnet to the supernatural. It's in your veins—was in your veins. Things changed."

He took a step back until he hit the door. Fear raced across his skin as he fumbled behind his back to reach for the doorknob.

"What changed, Kaname?" he said, trying his best to hold the terror at bay.

"You. I changed you in a weak moment. You aren't the same."

No, no, no… This conversation wasn't happening. Nightmare, he thought. It was a dream—a very, very bad one and he was going to wake up at any moment.

"Zero," Kaname whispered. "Be loyal to your nightmare."

Wide eyes stared at the brunette in horror. His voice, barely above a whisper, quivered as he asked the question he didn't want an answer to, "What did you do to me?"

"The sunlight, the loss of appetite, the craving for blood—then only being satisfied by my blood." Kaname was in front of him. Too close. The space was only but a few inches and the brunette leaned in further. "Hearing things you shouldn't. Healing quicker than humanly possible."

He shook his head in denial. "No, no… Those things—."

"Have happened or are happening to you, Zero. And you can run from it or you can embrace it. As the book states, be loyal to your nightmare."

He slammed his back into the wall to gain some distance. "You are my nightmare."

The sinister grin curled into view and Kaname whispered, "Exactly."

He felt faint. His legs wobbled and his heart nearly stopped. But with everything happening him, his body craved the very blood that disgusted him. He wanted nothing more than to sink his teeth into the neck hovering inches from him. He needed it—to quiet the monster stirring inside him. The vampire in him.

To the right was a small study desk, and without leaving the safety of the door, he quickly reached out and scrabbled to grab hold of the beaded rosary lying in the key bowl. They weren't religious by any means, but his adopted father insisted he and his brother keep the blessed object near.

He turned the knob to the door and staggered back. "No, that's a myth."

The recognition on his face must have been visible, because Kaname's smile widened further. "Says the guy with a cross pointed at me. Yes, it's true. Say it, Zero."

He stumbled to find his footing and took several more steps away from the monster, his fingers shaking to keep the rosary pointed upright. "Stop it then. Stop it from happening."

"It's too late, Zero. You're like me whether you accept it or not, so let me help you. Let me help you become the vampire you were always meant to be."

"Stop!" he screamed. Breathe, he reminded himself. He knew tears were forming and he didn't care if it made him look like a sissy, because his entire world had just shattered and he had nothing to cling onto except for a bloodthirsty maniac who had the hots for him.

"Let's go to dinner, Zero. I think you need to get something to eat." Faster than his eyes could blink, Kaname's arm was in his and they were walking down the corridor. The monster snatched the beaded cross from his grasp and discarded it. Fate seemed sealed the moment the metal cross clinked loudly against the wall.

Colors blurred as the yellow walls swirled with the gray carpet. Unease ate at his stomach. The man—no, monster—pulled at his arm and he stumbled, only to get back up on wobbly legs and fall all over. They weren't headed down the stairs, he realized. The double doors to the second story café commons swung open. Cold hair nipped at his exposed fingers, but the blood pumping through his frightened body deflected most of the initial chill.

He tugged back, but the creature held strong around his leather jacket and arm.

He panicked the closer they got to the edge. Fear sparked alive in his eyes. "You're crazy, if you think I'm going over the edge" he yelled. "We're at least forty feet up, you psycho."

The monster, Kaname, just chuckled and pulled on his arm harder, propelling his body forward until he was wrapped in the vampire's cloaked embrace. Those alluring burgundy eyes peered down at him. He'd be lying to himself if he had said he didn't feel safe in Kaname's arms. Familiar comfort, even.

The wind splayed Kaname's hair forward in a messy tangle of brown curls, and he felt captivated as it fully exposed the vampire's claret stare fixed on him.

"I told you I'd keep you safe, Zero. I mean that," Kaname said, a meaningful conviction to his tone that suggested he had done so prior to this evening. "Just hold tight."

Without any warning, the cold wind dissipated into a blending howl, like being thrown into a blustering tunnel. Blackness consumed his surroundings. His body pulsated with a power that had clawed inside him the moment Kaname's fangs had pierced his throat the night prior. Something in him knew how to bend with the shadows, to twist as the air hurled them forward towards their destination. His body felt broken into hundreds of pieces that spun in the night air, yet he felt connected to every single atom.

And with a sickening punch to his gut his body was thrown back into one piece. His feet hit the concrete and he fell to his knees, nearly retching up whatever contents were in his stomach. He knew Kaname was beside him and he put one hand up to stop the vampire from coming near him.

"Flying by Night is always hard at first, but you'll get used to it," Kaname stated plainly.

He sucked in a deep breath. "Did I just turn into a bat?"

"No, you turned into several bats. But they aren't truly bats. The darkness can lend a vampire power, which is why we're severely limited in daylight."

"Stop." He paused as he nearly vomited. A shaky hand to his chest, he turned a pleading gaze to Kaname. "Just stop saying that I'm—that…like you."

Kaname lifted him to his feet by his elbow, like he weighed nothing more than a bag of rice. And past the brown curls, he spotted an old cherry door he knew as well as his twin's eye color—a door he had walked through years ago, when the adoption agency took him and Ichiru for their first visit to their new father. That door encapsulated the somewhat normalcy he gained back after losing his parents, because Cross was the best damn father he could have asked for after his true parents.

Now he was supposed to walk through it and crush that normalcy? He couldn't put his adopted father in any trouble. He needed to get the monster away from the only good thing he had left.

Kaname must have seen the sudden panic drift into his gaze, because the creature gripped his arm tighter, as if to ensure he couldn't run away.

"Oy, kid," a familiar voice called out to him. "The old man got you, too, huh?"

Dread slid down his limbs and froze him. His old Sensei—his father's best friend, Yagari, stood next to him and sized him up and down with his good eye. Could he tell that evil ran his blood now? Did he sense the change in him?

Yagari's boot crunched against the stone walkway as he took a stop forward, hand extended. "I don't think I've had the pleasure of meeting you yet."

Kaname bowed his head in respect. "I'm Kaname. I have Literature class with Zero."

Kaname met Yagari's hand but they both stood there, silent. Tension filled the quiet and he wanted nothing more than to bolt off and escape the uneasy atmosphere.

Finally, his former Sensei took a long drag of the cigarette he had in his mouth and nodded. "Zero has a friend? Huh, I guess hell has frozen over. Why don't you join us for dinner?"

Kaname's lips curled up into a satisfied smile. "It'd be my pleasure."

No! His mind yelled at them, but the words wouldn't form out loud. Do not let that monster into the house! But the damage was done and the door had already opened, his adopted father stepping out into the night with open arms as he came forward to pull him into a hug.

His eyes were locked with Kaname's as they were pulled into the house. The wind around his hair stilled and the door slammed. Heat enveloped his face, and despite the warmth from the newly lit fireplace in the home, his body trembled.

Yagari put a firm hand on Kaname's shoulder. "This is Kaname, Zero's classmate. I told him to come to dinner."

A faucet in the house pattered to life in his ears. The sound took his mind to the kitchen, where he could hear the whistle of the kettle as if he were standing next to it, not rooms away, as well as the bubbling water of the boiling pot on the stove. The ticking clock in the dining room gathered atop the other sounds, and then the creaking of old wood as someone upstairs ran down the hall. Too much. So many sounds stacked together, but one sound shattered them all and dropped his tired mind back into the foyer, where he currently stood.

The pulsing rush of hot liquid whooshed to life in front of him. He could see Cross' veins move as the man's life circulated in those tiny tubes—tiny, fragile pieces of flesh that he could pierce easily.

Someone shook his shoulder. "Zero," Kaname whispered. "Are you thirsty?"

Yes, yes! So thirsty. He needed to just jump forward and grab the meaty neck in front of him, devour the skin swiftly and puncture the neck just above the man's clavicle.

Fire burned to life in his eyes as the heat of hunger consumed him.

A loud, shrill from the smoke alarm nearly caused him to fall to his knees. He gripped the wall and covered his ears in an attempt to drown out the ear-splitting noise.

"Oh no! I am burning the rolls!" his adopted father yelled out.

Smoke plumed into hallway. Yagari cursed something about how idiotic Cross was and then left after his adopted father, which left only he and Kaname.

Suddenly he was pushed against the front door, his arm lifted and trapped in place by Kaname's strong grip.

"Now you're starting to grasp what I'm saying, Zero. Now you're starting to understand, right? You can't go back to this life. The hunger will overpower you to the point you will kill one of them if you don't get it in control."

He shuddered.

Kaname leaned forward, grazing his soft lips against Zero's. "You felt the hunger, didn't you? I could see your eyes about to turn. I had to do something quickly."

His brows knitted together in confusion. "Do something?"

"Yes, so you can get yourself back under control. Unless you want to eat your family? If you do, I won't mind, but you may not be able to live with yourself. I have powers you'll, too, perhaps one day have—such as moving the dial up on a stove to make sure whatever is in it burns."

Realization hit. "You…"

"Me." Kaname traced Zero's lips with his tongue, the vampire's breath warm against his skin—inviting, begging him to taste them, just like they had at the club.

Their bodies pressed firm to each other, Kaname slanted his mouth over Zero's. The kiss started off chaste, just them exploring the softness of each other's mouths, but the charm Kaname had over him pulled him in. Just like the club, he didn't care who walked in on him. He needed the vampire to draw him further down that dark road—he wanted it.

He returned the kiss with fervor. He twisted his wrists in the vampire's grip and spun them around, so Kaname was pushed to the wall and he was on top. He deepened the kiss, exploring the vampire's heat, while purposely nicking his tongue on Kaname's fang. The explosion of blood between them ignited the passion further.

He kissed down Kaname's jaw, mirroring what the vampire had done to him in the club just the night prior. The blood beneath his mouth called to him. He sucked on Kaname's skin, pulling the blood forward toward the layer of flesh beneath his mouth.

His breathing quickened. A sharp pain struck in his mouth. He fisted his grip around Kaname's jacket, using it to keep him upright.

"That's what you need, Zero. Do it. Bite me," Kaname whispered, breaking free from the grip Zero had on his wrists. He slid a hand down Zero's shoulder, moving until his fingers were entangled in the smooth, silver locks, shoving Zero to his pulse point.

The blood the moved beneath his lips begged to be released. His fingers danced near the edge of Kaname's neckline, moving until his hand was intertwined in Kaname's curls.

He licked his mouth, his tongue brushing lightly over his canines—sharp, pointy teeth that had once been flat. Teeth he pushed into the willing flesh beneath them, barely creating a divot on Kaname's neck.

And then his world exploded in pain.

Fire overcame his exposed skin as he barely registered the wetness that dripped down his skin or Yagari's Latin chant, "Pello Pepulli Pulsum!"

He screamed. His fingers left Kaname's hair and found purchase in his own, his grip tightening as the agonizing energy danced further into body. He teetered and then fell to his knees.

He sensed Kaname's aura vanish and he heard the door slam closed.

Warm hands, comforting hands were on his shoulders, rubbing circles around his clavicle and then back to his neck. His eyes were clenched shut, but he knew Cross was the one kneeled before him, trying to soothe the agony that tore through him.

Cold water drenched his burning body and his eyes snapped open as he gasped. Yagari stood to his right with an empty pitcher.

"Shit," his former sensei stated. "We're too late."

"I know. I had hoped what we sensed was just the one vampire, but it got to Zero already," Cross said.

"That damn tattoo was supposed to ward those bastards and anything else off. That's why we inked up a child!" Yagari slammed the empty pitcher onto the entryway table.

"I know," Cross agreed.

"And now they have him. Fuck." Yagari paced the small foyer in circles.

"I know," Cross stated once more.

Yagari pulled out a cigarette from his khaki-colored trench coat. His hands shook, but he managed to light the cigarette from the first flick from his zippo. "We can still save him."

Zero fell back against the door, his eyes unmoving from the two men—frozen as the words played over and over in his brain: "too late, save him…"

"Kid, are you with us?" Yagari snapped his free hand in front of Zero. "We asked you a question."

His head slowly lifted. His wet hair clung to his face, beads of icy water continuing to fall over his lashes, but his gaze remained unmoving for several seconds before he finally blinked.

"I think there is something wrong with me," he whispered. "I am stuck in this nightmare and can't wake up. You," he pointed at Yagari, "threw holy water—"

"Fire. It's Holy Fire," Yagari corrected.

Zero nodded. "Right, Holy Fire," he agreed, as if he had any idea what they were actually saying. "And it burned me. And Kaname. And now I'm…what, wait, you asked me a question?"

"You're in shock," Cross said. "He's in shock, Toga," his adopted father reiterated.

"Kid, you gotta start answering our questions, shock or not. We are trying to save your life," Yagari said.

He let his head fall back against the front door and let out a deep, crazed laugh. "My life? I am not sure what the hell is going on. I think I'm going insane." He dropped his gaze and stared at them both intently, seriously. "I think I turned into a bat tonight. And I wanted to eat Kaname. Hell, I wanted to eat both of you—and I think my ex-boyfriend, too, earlier."

"Ex?" The father in Kaien asked.

"Yeah, Akatsuki broke up with me—but not because I wanted to bite his flippin' neck off." He slid up, using the door to his advantage to hold his weight until he finally stood before them. "He had a normal reason of wanting to date a woman." The bitter smile returned as he relived the conversation with his ex. "But, the entire time he was talking, I only thought of how awesome it'd be to rip into his neck. Yeah, cause, you know, I'm sane. AND, to top it off, sunlight hurts me, I turn into bats and some crazy guy with fangs has been stalking me!" He turned his attention to Yagari. "But sure, let's focus on saving my life, 'cause my mind seems so stable."

Kaname had been trying to push him to say the word earlier but it had remained frozen on his lips, and yet here, again, when the reality presented itself, he couldn't find himself willing to say it.

Soft and caring as always, Cross took a step forward and put a gentle hand on his shoulder. "We should talk, Zero. There are things about your family you need to know. Things about Yagari and I…"

"No!" He smacked Kaien's hand away. "You tell me what is happening to me! Tell me why." He looked at Cross imploringly. "Please…" He reached out and curled a hand in Cross' sweater. "Tell me what is happening."

Sorrow crinkled at the edges of his adopted father's eyes. "You know the answer to that, Zero."

He shook his head. "It's not true. It can't be true. You have to tell me this isn't real."

Cigarette smoke encompassed him as Yagari took a few steps towards him. "You know it inside. All of the things you said, you know what that means."

Something inside of him crushed under the reality of the thing he had become—the monster that coursed in his veins and consumed the once normal cells that used to reign.

His legs gave out, but Yagari and Cross caught him.

"I'm a vampire," he whispered. "I'm a fucking vampire."

The silence that greeted him in response was enough of an affirmation to the chilling truth.

The two men guided him into the living room and sat him on the couch. Cross grabbed the throw blanket from the loveseat and wrapped it around his shoulders. The fire that crackled to his left warmed his chilled, wet skin.

For years the small living room provided nothing but comfort. Cross had an old cottage taste in style, and the green faded sofa and love seat, blue circle braided rug, wooden mantled fireplace, even the oak framed kitsch paintings had elicited nothing but fond memories from his childhood, but now they felt unfamiliar, out of place—just like him.

"Do you need a towel?" Cross asked, as he took a seat next to Yagari in the loveseat across from him.

His eyes were immersed on the flickering fire. "No, I'm good. Thank you."

"We can tell you whatever you like, Zero." Cross' tone held nothing but sincere sympathy for him.

"Why me?" It was the first thing he could think of. Why was all of this happening to him. "And is that why you put a fucking—."

"Language, Zero," Cross interjected.

"Sorry, put a freaking rosary in our dorm room? Did you know this would happen?" he said.

Yagari took a long drag from his cigarette. "Your parents, really. It all goes back to them. They were hunters, like I am…like Kaien was. And the rosary isn't to ward off vampires, but rather a charm we placed on the ironically suited cross. It was to keep creatures from sensing your power, if your tattoo ever stopped working."

"A lot of good that did," he said with a glare and then changed the subject. "Hunters?" He pulled the blanket further over his shoulders. "Like…wild animals?"

"Like, wild vampires. We hunt those that hunt others and kill them. Your parents were like that. It's a gift, honestly. The ability to sense vampires, feel them—to yield those spells like the Holy Fire I threw on you. It is traits passed on from family to family," Yagari said.

"So…" He paused. "That would mean I was a hunter, and so was Ichiru?" He couldn't process most of what was being said, but he couldn't deny the change in him—the vampire that was consuming him, which made hearing this easier to comprehend.

Cross nodded. "Yes, you and Ichiru are of Hunter lineage. But twins amongst our kind are forbidden and extremely rare. One twin, you in this case, has the potential to inherit all of the power from their mother and father's genes, stealing away power and creating something—or someone—too powerful. And anything too powerful in our realm is sought after. You, for instance. The Association ordered you and your brother to be killed, but your mother couldn't do it. But they knew that something supernatural would come for you eventually—and they couldn't risk that much power being tipped into the vampires' favor, or anything else that tried to claim you. So, your parents ran. And ran. Doing their best to hide you and Ichiru."

His heart nearly stopped. "I am—." He stopped. How could he voice that he was a mistake? He wasn't supposed to even be alive? "Never mind, go on."

Cross recognized the hurt and offered an apologetic smile. "Your parents received help from a very powerful vampire family, who they had befriended. But, it caught up with them, and one night…"

Reality sank in and his eyes widened with understanding. "The car accident! The night they were killed and Ichiru and I nearly died. That wasn't an accident."

Pain flitted across Kaien's expression as he shook his head. "No, it wasn't. We don't know who for certain—."

"Yeah, right," Yagari interrupted. He flicked his cigarette butt into the open fireplace. "We smelled the heavy odor of vampire all over that place when we found them."

"But we don't know for sure, Zero," Cross said. "But after that night it was clear that you were sought after ever more so than we anticipated, so we had that tattoo on your neck drawn. And everywhere you go, live and move, Yagari and I put charms—to suppress your aura, the power the darkness seeks. You've always been able to sense them, the vampires, but the charm masks most of that, too, unfortunately, which is why your parents never put it on you."

"The darkness," he whispered, letting the words play on his lips. He had said that to Kaname in Lit class earlier.

"Yeah, kid, power inside of you," Yagari agreed. "It's like a plague that puts a giant target on your back that says 'take me', but we tried to hide it. The more we suppressed it, though, the more it fought inside you to break free." Yagari looked to Cross. "We suspected the charm's power had been fading. I warned you, Kaien."

"But it seems we were too late." He didn't miss the sadness that pulled at Kaien's lips—the frown that carried pity for what he had become.

"You said you could save me." He turned his focus to Yagari, a hint of determination flaring anew.

Yagari lit another cigarette. "Maybe. There is a way, but it's not easy."

The fire from the fireplace danced in his eyes. "Tell me," he demanded.

"You have to kill Kaname. Killing the vampire that turned you before you're completely turned is the only way. Once you bite him, you're finished." Yagari leaned forward and tapped his cigarette ashes onto the stone fireplace. "Once you're bitten, you're in a transition mode where you're in vampire limbo, like you are now, and the only way to fully turn is to bite the vampire that bit you. If you haven't done that, then you're good to go and killing them cancels the transformation. But, if you don't, and you never bite them, you'll fall into a level of vampire we hunt—a crazed vampire that won't stop until it kills every living human it comes across."

He played at the hem of his jeans, tearing a small hole at his knee. He tapped his fingers against his legs. "Kill him?" he whispered. The thought seemed impossible. He nodded slightly. "Okay, yeah. Does it have to be me? Can't you kill him for me? You said you were a hunter or whatever."

"I can't, no. You can't just kill him. You have to kill him and recite a charm to reverse the curse flowing inside you now. You do," Yagari stated matter-of-factly.

The raven-haired hunter stood up and walked toward the fireplace. He reached behind the printed Monet painting, lips pursed as he attempted to fit his fingers into the thin opening between the picture and wall. "Got it," he muttered.

A quiet pop sounded and the wooden floorboard near the edge of the fireplace snapped ajar. The hunter reached inside and pulled out a small cedar box. He offered the item to Zero.

"From your parents," he said.

He ran his hand along the offering, feeling the smooth groves of the wood and the tiny lines etched on the front that spelled out Kiryu. He set the box gently in his lap and clicked open the gold latch on the front. An old cedar aroma poured from the opened case. Dark blue velvet lined the bottom of the box, and resting atop the plush navy was a gleaming silver gun with the words "Bloody Rose" carved into the side.

His eyes snapped to Cross. "A gun? My parents left me a gun. Did they know this would happen? And why give it to me now?"

Cross' expression remained still, but he could see the sorrow just beneath the surface. "It's not just an ordinary gun. It's meant for hunters and has the ability to kill vampires, but it would be useless on humans if discharged."

He ran a quivering finger down the silver barrel. He hissed and pulled back when the weapon sparked a fiery blue and shocked him. "I don't think the gun likes me."

The sadness wasn't masked anymore, and Cross sighed deeply. "It is harmful to vampires. But your hunter blood should allow you to wield the weapon long enough to get a shot off."

His former sensei hummed in agreement. Yagari leaned against the fireplace mantel. "I know this isn't easy, but it's the only way."

He closed the lid to the cedar box and pulled the cased weapon near to his chest. He looked at both father figures. "What if I fail?"

"You won't," Cross said, a little too quickly.

"But you don't know what it feels like," he whispered, sitting back down on the comfort of the familiar couch. He set the cedar box to his right. "It's like…when he's near, when I see him, all I want…"

"You can fight it, Zero," Cross stated, hopefully.

"Fight it?" he said, exasperatedly. "I have this thing inside of me, this power, and I can hear things, feel things. I know what it wants. And it doesn't want to kill him. No, no, it definitely doesn't want to kill him." He shook his head, his fingers searching to find solace in the torn hole in his jeans. It was then he realized how badly his hands trembled. "How do you fight that? What if I fail?"

The crackle of the fire was the only noise for a moment.

Yagari pulled a cigarette into this mouth, pausing to light the end with a flick of his zippo. He inhaled twice, his gaze stuck on the curling fire. "Then it's my turn to aim."

…xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox…...

A light rain misted his silver bangs and he shook the gathering drops free. He left his adopted father's place nearly catatonic, but somehow able to change into a new pair of jeans. Ichiru had been upstairs, none the wiser to the situation, and was kind enough to let him borrow a white button up shirt and blue hoodie. The gun felt heavy, tucked away in the back of his jeans, but over his shirt so the metal didn't touch his exposed skin. He replayed the conversation he had just had with his brother over and over, and somehow felt the finality behind their goodbye was absolute.

"Here's the only thing I have to let you wear, " Ichiru said, handing him a pile of freshly washed clothes. He smiled. "At least we know they will fit. Twin powers."

He laughed, but it was empty. His gaze never left the dark silhouette looming in the doorframe. He couldn't be trusted enough with his twin, so Yagari followed his every step and watched the exchange passively. His heart broke at that.

"Thanks, Ich. I owe you." He looked up to twin. "I…I am glad you had an amazing birthday soirée last night. It means a lot to me that you're happy."

His brother glanced back, puzzled. "Zero, you okay? So not in your normal 'get away from me or I'll freaking kill you' vibe you normally give off."

"I know, but I needed you to know that. Take care little brother," he said, and then pulled Ichiru into a firm hug.

"Little! You're like four minutes older than me!" Ichiru paused. "And you mean a lot to me, too."

And then he had left, saying his goodbyes to his brother and the man he had called dad for the past fourteen years.

The nighttime hours had seen everyone to his or her beds and he was the sole occupant on the lonely street. He had walked these sidewalks for years, knowing every storeowner and neighbor within ten miles. It was a small town where they had grown up, and now knowing creatures had been hunting him his entire life, he knew why—but that only made the once familiar roads unknown once more.

Rain drizzled above the orange streetlamps. He shoved his hands into his pockets and walked down the slick sidewalks. He sensed the vampire in the town and he knew the monster watched him.

The rain started to fall harder. He pulled the hoodie over his head to block the rain from wetting it further. He paused at the end of the street, his reflection cast in the glass of the small in-town bakery.

"I know you're behind me," he whispered, his back remaining to Kaname.

Black shoes clicked against the concrete. "I don't think my first introduction to your father went well. I should have sensed they were Hunters, but I was too distracted. Holy water and vampires do not mix well when cast by hunters."

He turned to face the vampire. "Holy Fire," he corrected.

Kaname's lips curled into a knowing grin. "Ah, that's why it burned even more than normal.

The rain pulled Kaname's normal tight curls flat against the vampire's face. The burgundy eyes bore into his, searching out answers silently.

The vampire stopped in front of him, his hands in his pockets of his long pea coat, as he continued to wordlessly study him.

"You're not afraid," Kaname mused, eyes narrowing. "You're nervous, but hopeful." The vampire smiled. "They must have told you how to reverse my little immortal bite."

He didn't have to hide beneath the bravado that radiated from his stance. He stood tall, firm and with purpose. His life hung in the center of this fucked up nightmare.

Kaname stepped forward, his chest a finger length away. He reached up and pulled back Zero's hoodie. Their eyes locked. He glared, a piercing stare that sent a warning to the vampire to back down.

"I'm going to tell you a secret, Zero. I'm going to let you know why you are so precious to me—why you won't be able to kill me. Why I will win this game."

Thunder sounded in the distance and lightening streaked black night sky in a symphony of white chaotic lines that pierced the black stormy clouds.

Zero's right hand slid behind his hoodie, his fingers near, but not touching, the cold metal pressed against this shirt. The vampire's hand lingered on his shoulder, then pale fingers slid down his chest, tracing the outline of his zipper, which glowed a pale bronze under the streetlamps.

"You've already tasted my blood, Zero. Not once, but twice. You're bound to me, even if your heart says to slay the big bad monster that took your humanity. Even if you shoot me, you will remain forever a monster, slowly going insane from not completing the transformation and maybe even killing your family along the way."

He took a shaky step back. "What?" he said in disbelief. He shook his head in denial. "No…no—they said if I killed you—. You bastard!"

Kaname removed the distance and grabbed Zero's free wrist, spinning him and pushing him against the bakery window. Kaname pressed his icy cheek to Zero's. The vampire's breath tickled his ear and rustled the hair near his neckline.

"If you killed me before you were linked to me," Kaname whispered, deliberately blowing small breaths onto Zero's skin. "But you've been linked to me for a very, very long time, Zero."

He froze, too stunned to even blink. The crackle of electricity from the gun in his jeans snapped his mission into focus. With quick movements he slipped the weapon free, teeth clenched as the anti-vampire charms stung his palm, and pushed the cold, metal barrel into the meaty flesh beneath Kaname's jaw.

His anger rose and his lips pulled back, revealing a set of fangs the vampire so lovingly cursed him with. "If I cannot be human, then we both go." The conviction in his tone was fed by pure rage.

Too many years were manipulated by shit he couldn't control: His parents murder, his birth, and his own death sentence—and now a fucking vampire with an obsession for his forbidden power-laced blood. The weight of the gun in his hand reminded him that he controlled the outcome of this situation. He moved fate in his direction for once.

The rain grew heavier and large drops of water pounded onto them. The coldness seemed trivial compared to the weight of the damnation that hovered near his soul.

"Your eyes say enough. You intend to do what you say," Kaname said. "You want to be the noble hunter and die before vampirism claims you fully. I get it." Something sinister came to life in the vampire's eyes. "Or," Kaname continued, "you could tip the scale and come with me, leaving you at least alive to find your parents killers and bring justice to their innocent souls."

The gun felt suddenly heavier. "What?" His brows pulled down in confusion. "Vampires killed them."

Water collected on Kaname's white shirt, bleeding the fabric sheer until tan flesh seeped through. He licked his parched lips. He was so thirsty.

Kaname's signature smile flashed into view, his own fangs present as he mouthed the words, "Oh, really."

He pressed the gun deeper into the vampire's neck. Blue sparks ignited between them as the charms burned their flesh. The pain kept the hunger at bay.

Kaname's face fell serious. "I promised you I would never hurt you, Zero. I want you to think back to the night they died. The fire. Your screams for your brother as the flames drew nearer to him. The smell of burning fles—."

The gun wavered but remained tight to the vampire's skin. "Stop it! Stop..." But images were already flying through his mind without his permission.

The fire crackled, dancing closer and closer to his unconscious brother's body. Something sharp pierced his side, but he fought desperately to get to his twin. The smoke cloud engulfed their tiny forms, pulling the oxygen quickly from them. He coughed, his hands outstretched, and begged for Ichiru to wake up.

The lines of reality blurred and darkness swirled, but he made out a figure looming overhead. The man pulled his brother further from the wreckage and then came back for him. The cold snowy ground barely registered against his already chilled skin. He winced when something in his side pinched his ribs and he felt a warm liquid falling down his belly.

"You're hurt," the man said. "I'm going to give you something to take the pain away. Don't fight me."

The smell of crisp apples filled his senses as he inhaled the curled locks that tickled his cheek. The warmth carried into his blood as the stranger gave him a drink of something strong, which transported a heat throughout his body and to the pain pulsating in his side.

He tried to keep his eyes open, to cling to the stranger—who held him gently, with comfort, in arms that made him feel safe. The man's burgundy eyes faded into a bright crimson. And then it was silent.

He gasped. The gun clanged against the concrete. "You… It was you. You saved my brother and I." His expression grew frantic as everything tied together continuously—Kaname, the monsters, his parents' death, and his tattoo…

Kaname's grip tightened, his thumbnail pressing into the thin layer of skin below Zero's palm. Warm blood slithered through the lines in Zero's hand, erasing the cold rain that previously resided there. The vampire gingerly lifted Zero's hand to his mouth. Fangs protruded beneath red lips.

Zero's heart hammered steadily. The white tips of the Kaname's canines caused the muscles in his stomach to tighten as anticipation embodied him.

The rain stopped, but a misty drizzle continued to cloak the orange streetlamps in a wet haze. The temperature dropped and their breaths clouded the air in warm, white billows that lingered in front of them before they vanished.

Lightly, with a feather's weight, Kaname brushed Zero's bleeding wrist to his lips, rolling the white skin over his bottom lip. The red that painted the vampire's mouth intrigued him. He watched with bated breath, immobile and eyes wide at prospect of those little razor teeth penetrating his flesh.

He wanted it. Badly. A part of him that needed the darkness to consume him sprang to life again, just as it had in his dormitory and at the club—the night that had sealed his fate with the vampire. Or did it? The day he came into the world truly sealed his damnation. He was to either die or to…die, but perhaps with a little supernatural touch.

The crunch as Kaname broke through the first layer of skin made him flinch, but as the fangs disappeared, digging deeper into this wrist and claiming the thick vein that ran down his arm, he couldn't prevent the joy that raced through his body—the thrill that wanted it more.

After several mouthfuls of blood, Kaname removed his fangs, licking the wounds closed and then pressed a small kiss Zero's wrist.

He knew what came next. Did he damn his life for eternity with the monster that not only saved him years ago, but then killed him?

Kaname jacket rustled in the wind as the storm howled to life. The perfectly lined street trees shook the last leaves they had left free. Silver bangs obscured his vision, but he could guess that the vampire observed his movements, trying to piece together if Zero would reciprocate his immortal offering.

His mind wavered. He didn't know. Yesterday, no. An hour ago, still no. But now? Now he had more purpose in his life than he had the past eighteen years. Find his parents killer—just with a set of fangs and a thirst for blood. The wind carried the sweet scent he once sought after, the smell of comfort, of safety.

"Do you still want something more dangerous than fruity blue cocktails and poppy teens?" The sardonic grin the vampire so often used was back in place.

The breeze whipped wet strands of hair against his face. He teeth chattered against the cold drops of rainwater that continued to drip down his neck. His gaze never left the vampire.

"Will I still be me?" he asked, his words stuttered by the cold that had seized his exposed skin in an icy hold.

Even as he asked the question, he knew the answer. His body shivered at the wet cold blanketing them, but Kaname remained unmoving as if the elements didn't bother him at all. And he knew if he said yes, he would no longer be bothered by mortal sensations, too.

"Yes," Kaname said, softly. "You'll be you but so much more."

"Will I want to…eat everyone? Like how it is now?" He felt embarrassed to ask.

Kaname let out something close to a laugh. "No, generally not, as long as you've fed on a regular basis."

His gaze fell to his sneakers, to his reflection cast in the puddle beneath him, illuminated by the orange glow of the streetlamps. He wanted to remember how he looked now, in this moment, before he gave it up. His silver hair, even unnatural, looked human, looked normal. His violet eyes, pale skin, again foreign but somehow now they seemed average. His open hoodie, white shirt and jeans—all so human. Yet, unnatural still. He was a being that never meant to exist. He was something destined to be killed or devoured.

He hesitated.

Thunder sounded in the distance, cavernous and mighty—a roar that went deep to the bone.

What he finally looked up, he caught a glimpse of something that hung in the vampire's expression, a crinkle in his forehead and a pull to the sides of his eyes that spoke of the misery he felt. It was as if Kaname hated that Zero had to make the decision as much as Zero hated that he had to. Pity, perhaps, or sympathy for a life doomed from birth. Something maybe the vampire could relate to.

Zero rolled the edge of his hoodie between his thumb and pointer finger. "I don't know," he finally said. "This is fucking crazy."

Kaname closed the distance between them once more. His movements were soft, gentle and all too caring—a polar opposite to the needy, dark vampire he'd encountered the past couple of days. Kaname cupped Zero's face in his hand. He tried to ignore the lack of warmth from the vampire's touch, but every cell in his body mapped out every supernatural oddity in the man before him.

Kaname's hand slid behind Zero's head, long fingers wrapping in his damp hair. His teeth chattered against the cold lips that were pressed to his, but the warmth that ignited in his core fueled the passion to return the kiss with as much fervor as the vampire gave. His eyes fluttered closed. He found himself lost in the way Kaname's lips moved against his, how the vampire's hair brushed against his cheek, and how soft Kaname's mouth felt against his, how their tongues melded together perfectly.

In this moment he felt humanity. The vampire kissed with nothing but desire, lust and care.

A hunger flared alive. He could smell the metallic blood coursing in the body beneath him—a scent that sang to him and begged him to claim it. He intensified the kiss, teeth clashing against the vampire's. He pressed his hand firm to Kaname's chest, gliding his fingers up until he could grab a fistful of brown locks.

He broke the kiss with a pant. His eyes burned. He yanked back on Kaname's hair, pulling the vampire's head to the side so the smooth panel of skin beneath his jaw was exposed.

A sharp, intense pain sliced through his gums. He tightened his hold on Kaname's hair as his other hand curled around the lapels of the vampire's coat.

He needed to quiet the burn that flickered in his gut. His mouth parted only to be filled with the cool skin of the vampire that could silence the pain. Anger bubbled beneath his thoughts, bringing forth every wicked thought of his parents' death, or the people that had hunted him and the pain they caused. He had known he was a hunter for all but two hours, only to learn that they killed his parents, wanted to kill him and his brother, and hunted him for the better part of his first years. Screw them. Screw everything they had to offer. This man, this vampire, saved him, watched over him, protected him from the very people who were supposed to be his lineage.

In those thoughts, he had his answer. In that moment, he pushed his fangs softly against the vampire's neck.

Thunder boomed, but as the lighting flashed brightly above, he felt something sharp slice through his back, below his ribs on the left side. He staggered, but the vampire caught him. And through the pain, with his nose pressed firm to Kaname's chest, he couldn't help but smile at the familiar scent that washed over him, the smell of spring and summer combined.

Deep, scarlet blood swirled in the puddle beneath him, and he knew that he had been shot with a weapon meant to kill inhuman beasts—creatures like he and the man that held him.

"You're a fool, Zero," he heard his former teacher yell. "About to become the very creature your parents built a legacy protecting humans from."

"A legacy?" Kaname said, but there something guttural in his tone, like he had transformed into a feral beast ready to kill. "Your kind has destroyed hundreds of mine, and you want to call that a legacy built on protection?" And then the vampire laughed, a low, throaty laugh in mockery. "Your kind was supposed to protect its own, and they were the very ones that destroyed this child's life."

He wanted to scream that he wasn't a kid, that he was a man. He had turned eighteen just the night before, but his words were lost in the life that poured from the bullet wound and into the puddle below him. He wondered if his reflection would still hold the same human version of himself he had seen minutes ago, or if the vampirism that took over his cells from Kaname's bite had drained that last bits of humanity with it as it decayed under the hunter's magic. He realized with a bitter chuckle that he had never seen what remained of his humanity in that water, but rather the rebirth of the person he had become. He already was lost to the blood that he had tasted, to the vampire sickness that tainted his very soul.

He had been dead the moment he was born.

"We destroyed his life?" Yagari laughed. "We didn't steal his humanity, or turn him into some creature disguised as a human. You couldn't keep your fangs in your mouth, bloodsucker, and now it's come to this. I won't let him turn into that."

"Hunters were there to kill the Kiryu clan that night, not me. Your kind. They destroyed his parents and nearly his brother. And you call that a legacy worth dying for?"

Yagari remained silent. He knew his old teacher was working through the mental gears of the night of the crash.

His vision started to fade, and the lightening to his side looked like white splotches of messy ink spilt across a navy canvas. Kaname strengthened his grip around his back.

"I saved him. I healed him. I pulled his brother from that crash and gave Zero my blood only to save him from a fate far worse than immortality. So don't tell me his parents would be disappointed in a hunter that was fated for murder by your kind." The beast in Kaname's voice quieted. "I don't want him to die."

With fading strength, he clawed at Kaname's pea coat enough to stand, and just enough to rest his head on the vampire's neck, and even more to get a glimpse of his former teacher, standing feet away with a gun pointed at them. But even in death's haze, he saw the small tremor that caused the weapon to shake—the hesitation personified in that small action.

"So he's already tasted your blood before you bit him." Yagari made disapproving 'tsk' like grunt. "Irreversible bite, huh? But I can't let him become like you," said Yagari. "Hell, if he bites you…"

"He lives," Kaname stated, gently. "He has a chance at a life without fear. I am not like the vampires your kind hunts, and you know that. I am of pure blood, and with my blood, he will thrive. He was destined for great power. I left him alone for years, watching over him, knowing what he was and never making my move to see if he would grow into that power and escape the darkness."

"Zero," Yagari addressed him with sorrow. "I'm sorry, but I can't let this bloodsucker destroy what human part you have left, even if his intentions are what he says. There is no other way."

The lightening flashed and flickered across the metal barrel of the gun in his teacher's hand. The tremble in Yagari's finger had become still.

He was helpless to the pending death, but it didn't matter anymore. His body had already quieted to Death's lullaby. His eyes closed and the last sound he heard was the blast as the bullet left the barrel.

He drifted in unconsciousness. Images were scattered, like ragged clothes blowing in the wind, each weightless and unattainable once they rose further into the nothingness of his mind. He briefly wondered if the void was death and he had succumbed to either the first bullet or the second Yagari delivered.

But even in his mind he felt familiarity of Kaname's presence, whether it was real or purely the small amounts of blood that he had stolen from the vampire, he didn't know. He heard him. Quiet and gentle, he heard the vampire's voice in his head, begging him to open his eyes. But it was so hard. And in here it was quiet, and he liked the solitude, the stillness of not having to think of anything but nothing. No vampires, no darkness, no fear—just being, just drifting.

Louder the voice cut through, and in the void he could smell the freshly cut lilacs of spring and the sweet, crisp golden apples of late summer. He nearly tasted it. And then he did, so warm and delicious and filled with purpose, with reason.

His eyes snapped open and the first image to reach him was the worried gaze of the vampire that had stolen his humanity, and then it transformed to relief. And beyond him, the dark navy sky of nighttime, but the gray storms had faded and twinkling stars were unveiled, blinking brightly against the dark sky.

"Am I dead?" he asked.

Kaname smiled. "No, not yet. But you're close. I need you to complete the transition, Zero. Please. It has to be your bite, but willing. You don't have to die here, not as they said you should, but rather take hold of your destiny and choose for yourself for once. Live, Zero, if nothing but to show those bastards you were worth fighting for."

He nodded. Something he had fought so hard before seemed so simple. This vampire, this creature had saved him years ago, and then again tonight. He wanted to be completely devoured by the smell, by the comfort, by the adoration he felt from this man—this vampire. He wanted to live.

A move that seemed so hard to complete, seemed so easy, as he lifted his head to Kaname's neck, which he now realized was closer to him, being that the vampire was kneeling down, cradling his body to his chest.

Blood continued to pour from the bullet wound, but it didn't ache nearly as bad as it had before. And he noticed there was just the one.

Weak fingers moved Kaname's shirt collar to the side. He saw the pulse beating beneath the tan flesh.

"Did you kill him? My old teacher?"

"No," Kaname whispered. "I did not. I retreated, which means he will be back one day, but for now we are safe. We are far from there. Now, drink."

And he did. With that one command, and no longer able to fight the darkness destiny had bestowed upon him at birth, he pushed his fangs through the vampire's neck, and nothing in the human world could be used to describe the wholeness that coursed through his broken body. Every dark corner that cursed his soul was washed clean as Kaname's blood poured into him. Every dark mark of his curse was lifted under the power that pulsated to life in his cells. Every fear dissipated under the sweet smell of Kaname's life blending with his.

For the first time in eighteen years, he felt complete.

How long he drank as he stared at the night sky was lost to him. Time stilled for this very moment until he had become what he felt, for the first time in a long time, was something worthy of living.

He sat, legs folded, completely healed, and wiped the last remnants of Kaname from his mouth. The world was aglow with new sensations. The stars that once shone bright, now exploded in hyper white crystals that danced across a near purple hue. His skin felt every swoosh of the shifting wind, which carried all types of lovely smells to his now amplified senses, like roses, or water from ponds, and perfumes from people he couldn't see.

"It's a lot to take in, I know," said Kaname, as the vampire sat behind him, stretching his legs parallel to his so their bodies were pressed together, his back to Kaname's chest.

He smiled, because the one scent he had hoped wouldn't change did not. Kaname smelled as sweet as his memory could recall.

Kaname stayed quiet as he let the newness of his powers fully settle.

And then he was up, looking over the rooftop of the building he had just come to realize they were on. He stood on the ledge and peered over, to the busy street below. Unlike the city he grew up in, this one was large and full of bright lights and LCD screens flashing ads. Cars whistled by pedestrians, as they paid no attention to the vehicles, too caught up in the phones to their ears or in their hands. He could see all of that, even though he knew they were at least fifty stories high.

A warm hand intertwined with his, and he looked up in shock. He could feel Kaname's warmth now. The vampire felt alive in his fingers.

Unlike the darkness that had followed him around every corner, he felt a torrent of light encompass his soul. He truly felt free for the first time in eighteen years.

"I honestly didn't mean to bite you in the club that night. I've been watching over you since you were an infant, but from the moment you were born, I just knew you were special. My family was the ones that helped your parents hide for all of those years," Kaname confessed.

He stood in astonishment. The moment he had entered this world, from what Kaien told him, he was considered cursed, not meant to live, or to be devoured by something evil or supernatural. But this vampire, this man, watched over him for years and saw him as a person, a child worth a life, someone worth saving for more than the power within him.

"What do you want to do now, Zero?" Kaname asked, hand in his as they both stood on the ledge of the rooftop. "You truly are a beautifully powerful vampire."

With a new chance at life, he figured he should give into a new sense of himself and he leaned over and pressed his lips softly to Kaname's, who happily obliged to the kiss and parted his mouth in response, deepening the kiss. He savored every taste of the vampire, the heat, and the sensation of goose bumps that blossomed down his arms. Their tongues melded together, and he felt every sensation spark down his limbs. Human sensations, too, like how his stomach tightened and fluttered nervously, or how his breath hitched when Kaname's tongue swirled around his. The vampire tasted of sweet cherries, bursts of light and sun all mixed together—all things opposite to the darkness he was foretold vampires' were.

He was glad those senses were not lost to him now.

Gone was the stranger who stood in the ashes of his parents' death, or the man that had charmed him at the club, or even the vampire that had seduced him into becoming like him. Now he stood equal, alive and reborn. All the things Kaname had said were true, and he knew that despite his lack of humanity, he remained as he was before.

He had failed to kill Kaname. He was a vampire. He knew Yagari would try and hunt him down, but a glimmer of hope within shimmered alive with the possibility that they could show his former teacher a life without fear, a life of peace.

He licked the vampire's lips softly, pressing small kisses to the corner of his mouth, tasting the lingering blood from Kaname's lips—his blood.

He broke the kiss with a smile. "Live. I want to finally live."

….x.x.x.x.x.x.x.x.x.x.x.x.x.x.x.x.x.x…

Dudes, you have no idea how long I've been writing this off and on. It's just one of the many scattered fics I have in the VK realm.

The overall theme is obviously that despite how you feel your life has turned out, even if you're not appreciated from the get go, that you can just become a vampire and solve all of your issues. Kidding. But I am glad Zero never gave up, despite the odds.

Hope you all enjoyed the massive crazy that comes out of this brain.

Thank you ALL so much. I honestly am nothing without you guys. Lots of love. Give me a shout out so I know this fandom is still alive and awesome!