Mikey's P.O.V

i was practicing my bass when i heard the front door slam and someone run down to the basement and slam another door. the basement was Gerard's room, so i assumed it was him.

i hadnt talked to him in a few weeks, not since he started dating that one guy. not like i was jealous or anything, i just wished he would spend some time with me again.

i realized i had stopped playing and i started again, when i heard a little cry of pain.

we were the only ones home.

i put my bass down and ran to Gee's room i stopped at the door and took a deep breath. i knocked and i heard the tinkling of metal on cement. "W-who is it?" who do you think it is retard? "Its me bro, are you ok?" i heard him sniffle, but he said nothing.

i sighed, why do i even waste my time? "Well, im in my room if you need me." i called thru the door, starting to walk away, when his door opened a crack and he peeked out, his eyeliner ran down his face from the tears, his eyes red, his face paler than usual. it hurt to see him like this.

"Are... are you ok?" i asked in a whisper, my own eyes tearing up. "Can i talk to you?" he asked, looking down. "Y-yeah, of course!" i said. he opened the door a little wider and i went in.

it had been forever since i had been down here, the walls were covered in his drawings, pictures of us still hung on his mirror, the sheets were messy, clothes and candy bars littered the floor. i noticed little red drops on the floor, next to a blade. i turn to see he had cut himself.

"Gee! why would you do that?" i asked, running over and hugging him. "H-He broke up with me! i slept with him and he broke up with me!" he was crying again, sobbing into my shoulder. "Shh, its ok Gee, you dont need him, shh." i said leading him to the bed. we sat and he told me what happened.

they had skipped school and Darren (his ex) seduced him and Gee gave in, they had sex, then Darren told him he didnt want him anymore, that he was done with him.

Gee was crying so hard, gripping his hair, shaking like a leaf. i felt horrible "Gee, fuck him! you dont need him, your a great looking guy, im sure you will find someone else who loves you! you know i love you right?" i asked. he looked into my eyes and nodded. i pulled him into a hug, he nestled his face in my neck. "I love you Gee, im sorry i havent really talked to you, i didnt think you wanted to-" i was saying when he started kissing my neck.

i froze, what was he doing? his lips were traveling up, stopping just next to my lips. "I love you too Mikey..." he whispered and kissed me. i literally couldnt move. his hands moved into my hair and his tongue traced my lower lip, begging for an entrance. and i actually opened my mouth a little, his tongue snaking in, playing with mine.

what am i doing? why am i kissing my own brother? why was he kissing me? WHY AM I LIKEING IT? he pulled away and started to suck on my neck, i whimpered a little, my breathing was almost panting, and i was still frozen. he gently pushed me down on his bed and he climbed ontop of me, sucking on my jaw. i started to feel an umcomfortable pressure in my pants. omg, im hard. i pushed him off and ran out of the room and went to mine, slamming the door. i could hear him crying again.

wtf?

why did i do that? why did i let him do that? why the fuck am i still hard? why did it feel good? why was i mad that i ran off? ok, this boner is seriously begging for some attention. so i undid my pants and started to touch myself when my door opened and Gerard came in. "Mikey im, sor-" he was saying till he saw what i was doing.

we were both frozen.

then he walked over to me and replaced my hand with his. he started to stroke me and i let out a little moan. "Do you like it when i touch you?" he whispered, lust in his eyes. i couldnt answer, i just lost myself to his touch. he got on his knees and put me in his mouth. i moaned loud, god his mouth was so warm! he took me down his throat, groaning onto my dick.

my shaking hand wound itself into his hair, gripping a fist full of it. it wasnt long till i came down his throat, he actually swallowed it. he got up and looked into my eyes. what was happening here? he kissed me and i kissed him back. "I love you Mikey..." he whispered and left.

i didnt come out of my room again that night, not even for dinner. what is going on with me?

the next day i woke up to a touch. i opened my eyes to see Gerard sitting at the foot of my bed. "Hey..." i whispered. "Hey..." he whispered back, smiling at me. i got up and sat next to him. "Gee, im sorry about yesterday, i-" i was saying, but he kissed me.

i kissed him back, loving the feel of his tongue on mine. i crawled ontop of him, feeling his hardness, so i grinded him. he moaned into my mouth and kissed me harder. i bit his bottom lip, sucking on it for a second, then kissed him again. "Boys? are you ready to go?" our mom asked from downstairs.

i jumped off of him, falling onto the floor.

"Almost mom, Mikey still needs to wake up." Gee called back, closing and locking my door. he went over to help me up, but i shoved him on the bed and pulled his pants down. "M-mikey, you dont need to, i can take care of it." he said, tho i knew he just said it to make me feel better. i smirked up at him, licking his head.

he trembled.

i shoved him in my mouth and he sucked in a deep breath. i was hard now too. i was sucking on him hard, i could taste the pre-cum. i was touching myself too, he suddenly shot into my mouth, and it tasted as bad as i thought. i swallowed it though and then i came all over my hand. he sat there, panting, then he kissed me, "Thanks Mikey, i love you." he whispered, kissing me again.

we got dressed and went downstairs. our mom was still doing her hair, "What took you so long?" she asked me "I didnt really sleep well last night, im tired." i said. she looked me over and for a minute i was scared. why was she looking at me like that? did she know? i could feel my hands get sweaty and my eyes were wide.

she just brushed off some lint and walked away. i let out a sigh of relief and walked after her. Gerard came and held my hand as we walked to the car. why did i like that? i sat in the back and he slid in next to me. "Dont you want to sit in the front Gerard?" mom asked. "Naw im good." "How about you Mikey?" "No thanks." she looked confused, we usually fought for shotgun, but she shrugged and started the car. i was still holding Gee's hand, his thumb tracing little circles on mine.

wat was going on with us? why are we doing this? why does it feel so right? he's my brother for cryin out loud! i loved him! but was i in love with him? i never thought id be incestuous, but hey, theres a first for everything!

"So Gerard, how are you and Darren?" mom asked, and i could feel him tense. then he started to cry. i pulled him to me, letting him cry into my shoulder. "What did i say?" she seemed belwildered. fury ran thru me and i said "Just drop it mom! jeez, dont you get the fuckin hint?" "Michael!" she snapped, "i said DROP IT!" i snapped back. "Guys! please dont fight! i-i cant... i just-" Gee was saying and i held him closer, whispering "Its ok babe, let it out." did i just call my brother babe? he snuggled closer to me, letting more tears fall.

"Michael, we are going to talk about this." mom said, not affected by Gerard's tears. "Whatever." i said, still holding Gee. we were on our way to Frank's house, our parents were always really close. we were almost there actually, and i could tell Gerard was making a visible attempt to control himself. he pulled away, wiping his eyes and tried to fix his eyeliner.

he looked at me with warm eyes and mouthed the words "Thank you." and i mouthed back "I love you." he smiled abit and said "ditto" "What?" our mother asked, he had said it out loud. "Nothing, just thinking out loud." he mummbled shrinking into his seat.

Frank waited for us outside and when Gee and i got out of the car holding hands, his eyes went wide and a large grin crept onto his face. Oh my God, did he know? how did he know? was he going to tell? was he gonna hold it over our heads? "Hey Mikey! watsup?" he said, glancing up at Gee, who was blushing like crazy. "Nothing." i whispered and let go of Gee's hand. "No, no, no! share the brotherly love!" he mocked with a giggle, Gerard punched his arm.

"Ow! jeez, i was kidding! 'sides, im happy for you." Frank said to him. i looked at Gee with confusion, but he refused to look at me. "So how are you and watshisface?" Frank asked. "We broke up." Gee said, holding back tears. "Figured, he called me hystarically crying-" "Frank," Gee interupted, but he went on, "saying that you didnt want him anymore-" "Frank!" Gee tried again, but was ignored "that you fucked him and told him it was over. did you finally realize that you wanted Mikey more than-" "SHUT THE FUCK UP FRANK!" Gerard snapped, nearly pushing him off the Porch.

and i wanted to die.

Gee lied to me, he told me the complete opposite, just to get with me? i looked at my feet, trying to think, but i couldnt, not with this hurt killing me slowly. "Mikey... im sor-" but i took off, running as fast as i could. "Mikey!" i heard them yell after me, but i didnt want to go back.

he tricked me, he tricked me into doing those things with him, omg what have i done? i sucked off my own brother! i let him suck me off! i even told him i loved him less than five minutes ago. i stopped running in the middle of the street. i felt like dying. my phone buzzed and i checked it, it was a text from Gerard saying

'Mikey im sorry! please come back, i need you!'

i didnt care if he needed me, that was probably a lie too. i didnt even realize i had sunken to my knees. why was i so stupid? then i got a text from Frank saying

'Mikes, c'mon dude, we can talk about this.'

a loud honk made me realize i was still in the middle of the street. i got up and walked into an alleyway. i didnt even know where i was, i knew i was farther than i thought, none of these streets looked familiar, and i was hanging out in alleyways, not the smartest thing to do in Jersey. i got a text from Gee,

'please at least tell me where you are!'

then one from Frank,

'Mikey, seriously, come back, or tell us where you are, we are worried.'

i just shoved the phone back into my pocket and walked out of an alley and into a busy street. i saw a small coffee shop across the street so i went in. i went to the back and sat at a small booth next to the window. i kept getting texts from them saying

'please, where are you?'

'dude, your scarin us'

'Mikey! stop it and just tell me!'

'thats it, we are callin the cops.'

i almost wanted to write back and say

'and tell them what? that i ran away cuz i fell for my brother and let him touch me and now he's worried i wont come home and let him do it again?'

but i knew that they probably wouldnt find me, so i just put my phone back down. suddenly, a waitress came and handed me a cup of coffee. i was going to tell her i didnt order anything when she said "As stupid as this sounds, the guy at the register sent this for you, its apparently on the house." she rolled her eyes and set it down.

i looked and saw Ray. he waved, but looked really concerned. i gave a halfassed wave back and took a sip of my coffee, too much sugar and too much cream with a touch of carmel, just the way i liked it. from the corner of my eye i could see him taking his apron off and walk to me.

"Hey there Mikes! wats up?" he sounded concerned too. "Did you know too?" i couldnt help but ask, "Bout wat?" "Bout Gerard's secret?" he looked confused for a minute, then it hit him. "Oh... that..." "Yeah, that." "How did you find out?" i told him everything and he was staring at his hands.

"So how long have you known?" i finally asked him. "Eh... awhile..." "And you couldnt tell me?" "He made us swear not to tell!" "Us? who all is Us?" "Me Frank and Bob..." i gripped my hair hard, trying not to scream, i felt sick. "Mikey, im really sorry, you know i wouldnt keep it from you unless i had a real reason." "What. Was. The. Real. Reason?" i snarled thru my teeth.

"Gerard wanted to tell you! he made us swear to God, he wanted to tell you himself, but he knew you wouldnt accept it, so he started dating Darren. Mikes, he totally loves you." my head was spinning, i felt so dizzy, i couldnt breathe, i could feel my pulse in my temples.

i got up and tried to leave, but i collapsed. "Mikey! Mikey are you ok?" i heard Ray ask, but with each word he faded out till i was in blackness.