Title: Caged Hearts
Summary: They weren't trained to love. They're not even supposed to know what love is. So can they hide their feelings in a place that's watching their every move?
Rating: R (An NC-17 version can be found on my web page or at Gumboot Mafia)
Pairing: M/A
Genre: Angst, romance, AU
Background: In 2009, Max was caught while the others escaped. She, along with a few others, was moved to a different facility. She went through reindoctrination until she became a good little soldier again. At fifteen, the X5s were broken down into different groups according to whatever specialized weapon they were to become. In Max's group is 494. She names him Alec. Their relationship started off antagonistic but by 2018 when the story begins, they have become "secret lovers."
Part One
"Alec." Max gasped. "Harder!"
He readily obliged.
His knees should be hurting him as they supported the two of them on the cold, hard ground of the forest that surrounded them. But he was lost in her. The pain in his knees could not compare to the bliss her body provided for him.
"Alec!" He heard her scream at the same time her inner muscles gripped him fiercely, and then he burst.
Slowly the sounds of birds chirping and the rustling of tree branches as squirrels hopped from one to another registered to the ears of the sated X5s. However the two gave no indication of acknowledging the scenery. Max remained wrapped around Alec, his hands just below her ass supporting her as they continued to kiss, both reluctant to separate.
"It's been way to long." Alec said once they came up for air.
"Tell me about it." She sighed.
"Hey, where you going?" He pulled her closer to him when he felt her trying to get off of him.
"Alec." She laughed as she pretended to struggle to get away from him.
"Maxie, come on, we have time."
"We do not. Ohhh."
"Sure we do." He mumbled against her throat between licks.
Max closed her eyes and moaned, but a second later she was on her feet as was he a few feet away from her. They both heard the sound of approaching footsteps in the distance; therefore, no words were spoken as they redressed in a blur.
"452 and 494!" A voice boomed five minutes later.
The two X5s promptly snapped to attention.
"Sir yes sir!" The two replied in perfect unison.
"Status!" The TAC leader barked.
"Sir, five holes measuring 4 by 9 by 6 feet spaced one foot apart as ordered, sir!" 494 answered.
"Very good soldiers. Gather your supplies and report to your sections immediately."
"Yes sir!" The two saluted before turning to do as ordered.
"Well that was close." Max said after she was sure the TAC leader was long gone.
"Imagine if he had come ten minutes earlier." Alec smiled at her. "I don't know if I would have been able to stop." He added huskily.
"He would have had quite a show. Think they would have giving us adjoining suites in Psych Ops to show their appreciation?"
It was meant to be a joke but the two couldn't help shuddering anyway at the very real possibility. As an attempted escapee and a twin of an escapee, both had spent their share of time in Psych Ops and neither was itching for a return trip.
It was really quite remarkable that they were taking such a chance at all, considering the risk. But being together had become like a drug. Manticore ensured that they were repressed every second of every day. So the times when they could sneak off, the sheer joy and freedom of their coupling were addictive. And they decided it was a risk worth taking.
***
They didn't dare sit next to each other or even look at each other during lunch. They learned a long time ago what a distraction just the sight of each other could be for them. Distraction was never tolerated but it was even less so the fifteen minutes before lunch.
They wanted perfect soldiers and they were never allowed to forget that they were supposed to perform perfectly so Manticore made them work for everything and food was no exception.
A folder was waiting on every table. Some folders contained partial schematics for a weapon or structure and the group had to finish it correctly. Sometimes they had to look through autopsy photos to ascertain the cause of death, no matter how gruesome. Other times it was a complex math equation. But no matter the task or level of difficulty, they had to solve it as a group within fifteen minutes or else the entire table did not get to eat.
Their table finished with three minutes to spare. Alec chanced a look in her direction. She was seated with her back completely straight and her hands clasped on the table in front of her like he was, like they all were. But unlike him her eyes were, like everyone else's, blankly staring forward. There'd be no getting her attention now. He'd have to wait until later.
***
Max put the P90 submachine gun back on the shelf and grabbed another one. Just one more to go and then she'd be done. She wasn't particular thrilled with being surrounded by all this fire power. Her thoughts usually turned dark. For almost every single kind of weapon she had to clean and load, she could remember the face of a unit member who was either dead or severely injured by it.
But she did like the time she got to be alone while she worked. No TAC leader barking orders at her or even better no dull eyed soldier for a partner. She much preferred to do assigned tasks alone unless of course she was partnered with 494. Alec. She noticed that no matter what time of day it was, where she was, or what she was doing, thoughts of him eventually would seep into her brain. Not that she minded.
"Hey Maxie."
Speak of the devil Max thought before hissing. "Are you crazy!" She continued to scowl as she sent a warning look at the camera. "You know better than to call me that."
"Shush shush its okay." Alec said calmly. "Dobson's on surveillance and he owed me a favor."
"They're not watching in here." Max said looking at the camera again.
"Nope, it's just you and me." He answered while closing the door and locking it. "You can say my name as loud as you want."
Max grinned before putting down the big gun and launching herself at him. The two tumbled to the floor with Max landing on top. Slowly she leaned down and covered his mouth with hers. She felt his fingers move through her hair as they explored each others mouths.
"Alec." She sighed in the aftermath making him smile against her throat. He wondered if she knew the power she had over him just be saying his name.
She had given it to him not long after they first met. The name was not meant to be a compliment. The same was true for him because whenever he said her name he did it mockingly.
If she fucked up and was being verbally stripped as soon as she passed him in the line on the way back to her spot in formation she'd hear him under his breath saying snidely "way to go Max?" And the same would go for him. "Nice one Alec," he knew he'd hear whenever he messed up.
But then a funny thing happened. While away on a mission, they were the only two that had to infiltrate the building. Once inside they had to split up but they had com links between the two of them.
"Alec, I'm in position and it's clear."
"Right behind you, Max."
The snideness was gone and it seemed so natural to drop it that it didn't dawn on them until they were back in the van and their CO was asking for a briefing that not once while they were communicating inside did they use their designations. When they got back to the base, if no one else was around calling each other by names rather than designation became the norm. It became like a code for them; a way they knew they could rebel but only with each other. No one else had names, and if they did, they never dared use them. So for 452 and 494, using Max and Alec instead, was the beginning of a friendship.
But friendship was a relationship discouraged immensely by Manticore. Loyalty to Manticore was above all the most important. Reporting a unit member for an infraction wasn't considered ratting out or betrayal, it was for the good of Manticore for the unit member to be punished if they messed up, and not reporting something seen spelled trouble for the entire unit. It gave one a headache whenever you really tried to understand Manticore's logic. Loyalty was the most important but you couldn't trust the people you were supposed to be loyal to because the best way to show how loyal you were was by betraying a member of your unit.
Having and using names other than designations was a big no no which meant 494 could have turned "Max," in the moment she told him her name and gave him his. However he didn't. For a long time, Max wondered about that. After all, Alec resented the O'niners with a passion because he was a twin and had to suffer for their desertion. He reminded her of that often enough angering her to no end because they had been part of her unit and she still had affection for them.
Most of their early arguments and fights had to do with his frustration that she could still defend them even after being put through Psych Ops. Sometimes Max wondered too if her reason for adamantly defending them was because she really felt that way or was it just to piss off 494 because Manticore certainly did a thorough job of telling her that her old unit were traitors and deserters. And sometimes when things were particular bad or she was in a great deal of pain Max did feel like they had abandoned her. But it didn't last.
More than anything she believed she was a failure and that's why she didn't make it out. Slipping through the ice and getting caught because of it was inexcusable; totally her fault. She knew she would have kept running if any other unit had fallen, just like when she thought they had Zack. So she couldn't really blame them for leaving her behind. She could only blame herself which is why she pushed herself to be a really good soldier once she was reindoctrinated. Her stellar record was why she was eventually trusted to do missions only a few years after the escape. She was even cleared before Jace whom hadn't even tried but just being part of the original unit meant that they had a lot more tests to go through before they could be sent out on missions. Max needed to prove to herself that she wasn't a failure and she needed to prove to the others that she wasn't weak because she tried to abandon her mission so she always pushed herself as hard as she could and therefore passed with flying colors. She was cleared at the same time the twins were which was still a year after the other X5s were because being a twin also meant more tests and harsher punishments.
She didn't know why meeting 494 had such a self destructive effect on her. Kicking him in the balls and screaming at him that her name was Max and then naming him too certainly gave him enough ammo to make sure she was placed on heavy restriction for the remainder of her days. But he never turned her in, even though they seemingly hated each other. It was that act that first bonded them. And the fact that they broke that rule meant that whenever the other one wanted to do something wild and crazy they always knew who to go to. In effect they became partners in crime behind the iron curtain of Manticore.
But it was a dangerous game they started in a place where anything could be used against you.
"Hey Maxie, we gotta get up now." Max nodded and slowly got up. Before dressing she put the machine gun she had been working on before being interrupted back. She then quickly loaded the last one.
"Where you off to now?" Alec asked as they dressed hurriedly.
"Lab."
"Observation?" Alec asked with a hopeful expression. Max looked down and Alec's hopeful expression immediately fell. "Subject." He whispered to which Max nodded slightly in confirmation. "Do you know what they're gonna do?"
Max shrugged easily a brave smile on her lips. "Whatever it is I can handle it."
Her words were empty and her smile was forced. They both knew it.
Alec closed the small distance between them and then titled her head up and kissed her deeply. "Just think about our adventure in the woods and here…if…you know if it gets, you know, to be too…much."
Not trusting herself to speak, Max nodded and quickly stood. After dressing in silence, Alec pulled her to him and squeezed her tightly before recapturing her lips.
"I'll see you later, okay." They didn't dare say goodbye…ever. In their lives, despite seeing each other everyday and in essence living together, a goodbye could actually be forever.
"You bet."
TBC