I keep telling myself that this is wrong. This entire situation is ridiculous, I often tell myself. And it´s funny, really. Cause my friends are now hers friends. And my life is now hers life. And in the same time that she gets everything she ever wanted, everything I ever wanted is being taken away from me. And in the same time she is so happy, I am so sad. I just can´t bring myself to like her. We are supposed to be best friends, but this is something I just can´t blame her. Because she hasn´t done anything wrong. It is, after all, my fault. And I just don´t want to live like this anymore. But I can´t runaway. Why do I have to suffer like this, I will never know. But I cope.
She often tells me how happy she is. She tells me about her friends. Yes, those mine friends. And I am the one that has to keep up pretending like nothing ever happened between us. That we are honest to each other. But I can´t go on like this forever. I want scream. I want to cry. I want to do anything. But I can´t.
And so I live like this. Everybody loves her, and I am her shadow. And I am a great actor too. I hate this. But It won´t be any better. Not until I won´t runaway. And believe me, I will...