Harry Potter and the Devil Turtle Cows (A/N: don't ask, just read)
Harry is sitting in the common room talking with Ron about Quidditch when Hermione comes in.
Hermione: did you guys hear what just happened? The Devil Turtle Cows have invaded Hogworts!
Harry: the What?
Hermione: the devil turtle cows! They are cows with turtle shells and look like the devil! When will you ever read Hogworts, A History?
Ron: what does that have to do with anything?
Hermione: it doesn't, but I'll just ask you all the time until you do.
Harry: I did.
Hermione: you did? Really?
Harry: no, I just wanted to see how you would react.
Ron: so about the cow devil turtles...
Hermione: the Devil Turtle Cows, Ron. When will you learn?
Ron (strikes dramatic pose): Never!
Harry: so what happened with those cows? Does it have to do with Voldemort?
Ron: say You-Know-Who!
Hermione: no, they have nothing to do with Voldemort. They just stand around and wear ONLY SLEEVES! (A/N: I knitted a sleeve once. It was cool. Then someone tore it ::sniff:: anyway, continue reading)
Harry: why sleeves?
Ron: maybe because it's better than wearing only sun-glasses.
Hermione: shut up Ron!
Ron: don't tell me to shut up! (bends in and kisses her)
Hermione: why did you just kiss me? We all know I like Harry!
Harry: you do?
Hermione: did I just say that out loud?
Harry: yes...
Hermione: oops...
Harry: I love you too.
(they embrace while the entire common room {mainly Ron, come to think of it, only Ron stayed in the common room after the announcement about the Devil Turtle Cows} burst into cheers)
(the Devil Turtle Cows enter and start dancing on Xeroxed blank sheets of paper)
Ron: why would anyone Xerox blank sheets of paper?
Hermione: because the author is insane. It says so in Hogworts, A History.
A/N: no it doesn't
Harry: hay, how did you get here?
A/N: oops... (disappears)
---__________________________________________________________________________
(alternate ending)
Harry: why sleeves?
Ron: it's better that wearing only bandannas.
A/N: hay, what's wrong with bandannas? if you tie knots in the right places, you can turn it into almost anything! A bag, various kinds of hats, Devil Turtle Cows,... OK, I made up the last one, but the rest is true!
Hermione: hay, A/N what are you doing here?
A/N: defending the rights of bandannas.
(the Devil Turtle Cows come in and start dancing)
THE END
___________________________________________________________________________
A/N: HEEHEE. Just goes to show that it IS possible to write an insane story when you are high on... (this is not what you are expecting) PRETZELS! HAHAHAHAHAHA!
R/R/R/R/R/R/R/R/R/R/R/R/R/R/R/R/R/R!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Harry is sitting in the common room talking with Ron about Quidditch when Hermione comes in.
Hermione: did you guys hear what just happened? The Devil Turtle Cows have invaded Hogworts!
Harry: the What?
Hermione: the devil turtle cows! They are cows with turtle shells and look like the devil! When will you ever read Hogworts, A History?
Ron: what does that have to do with anything?
Hermione: it doesn't, but I'll just ask you all the time until you do.
Harry: I did.
Hermione: you did? Really?
Harry: no, I just wanted to see how you would react.
Ron: so about the cow devil turtles...
Hermione: the Devil Turtle Cows, Ron. When will you learn?
Ron (strikes dramatic pose): Never!
Harry: so what happened with those cows? Does it have to do with Voldemort?
Ron: say You-Know-Who!
Hermione: no, they have nothing to do with Voldemort. They just stand around and wear ONLY SLEEVES! (A/N: I knitted a sleeve once. It was cool. Then someone tore it ::sniff:: anyway, continue reading)
Harry: why sleeves?
Ron: maybe because it's better than wearing only sun-glasses.
Hermione: shut up Ron!
Ron: don't tell me to shut up! (bends in and kisses her)
Hermione: why did you just kiss me? We all know I like Harry!
Harry: you do?
Hermione: did I just say that out loud?
Harry: yes...
Hermione: oops...
Harry: I love you too.
(they embrace while the entire common room {mainly Ron, come to think of it, only Ron stayed in the common room after the announcement about the Devil Turtle Cows} burst into cheers)
(the Devil Turtle Cows enter and start dancing on Xeroxed blank sheets of paper)
Ron: why would anyone Xerox blank sheets of paper?
Hermione: because the author is insane. It says so in Hogworts, A History.
A/N: no it doesn't
Harry: hay, how did you get here?
A/N: oops... (disappears)
---__________________________________________________________________________
(alternate ending)
Harry: why sleeves?
Ron: it's better that wearing only bandannas.
A/N: hay, what's wrong with bandannas? if you tie knots in the right places, you can turn it into almost anything! A bag, various kinds of hats, Devil Turtle Cows,... OK, I made up the last one, but the rest is true!
Hermione: hay, A/N what are you doing here?
A/N: defending the rights of bandannas.
(the Devil Turtle Cows come in and start dancing)
THE END
___________________________________________________________________________
A/N: HEEHEE. Just goes to show that it IS possible to write an insane story when you are high on... (this is not what you are expecting) PRETZELS! HAHAHAHAHAHA!
R/R/R/R/R/R/R/R/R/R/R/R/R/R/R/R/R/R!!!!!!!!!!!!!