Title: A Heart Full of Love
Author: jeytonbrucasnaley/only_because3
Rating: T
Word Count: 2181
Pairing: Quinn/Rachel, though this is Rachel centric
Summary: She's inspected every single inch of him the day he was born and then again when they brought him home.
Author's Note: Part of the 'I Could Be In No Better Place' verse. Babysat my adorable, chunky monkey cousin this weekend. I wanted explore this a little bit more but it sort of wrapped itself up at the end (and I got tired). Enjoy! Also, I want to clarify that both Rachel and Quinn breastfeed Evan. I would recommend looking up wet nursing on wikipedia. It's not that common in the US anymore but I think it's a pretty cool idea and has a lot of benefits (more bonding time between Quinn & Evan, Evan is not 100% reliant on Rachel's tit for food, etc)

This is amazing.

She never got to do this with Holly since she really wasn't involved until Holly was one and not seriously until she was two. It's not like she hasn't sat down like this before, with Evan laying on the bed beside her and just… looked at him. She's inspected every single inch of him the day he was born and then again when they brought him home. But he's so much bigger now, just two weeks shy of 5 months, and his personality is here and obvious. She's thankful that the rest of her family have gone out, making their usual Sunday trip to the Farmer's Market, so she can take this time to just be with her son. Sometimes she feels like Quinn and Noah find it ridiculous that she has the need to study their son so carefully like this. She's just so fascinated by him all ready and he doesn't even really do anything.

She lets out a sigh that grabs Evan's attention and now her son is looking up at her with these huge green eyes, a gummy smile on his face. "Hi baby," she coos as she runs a finger over his eyebrow softly. It was a complete surprise that Evan's eyes came out green. She knows it's common for babies to be born with light eyes, but his eyes haven't really changed at all. They're this glorious green for the most part, though if he's dressed in blue, his eyes will follow suit. His eyes haven't gotten any darker than a deep green and she finds it so weird since she and Noah have brown eyes. It's all attributed to recessive genes (as it turns out, Noah's dad has green eyes and well, she really doesn't know anything about Shelby's family) and she's okay with that because she thinks it makes Evan look like all three of them. Holly is the perfect mix of Quinn and Noah, right down to her eyebrows. Evan has Noah's nose and her mouth, but his eyes somehow scream Quinn and it's pleasantly unexpected. And even though his features are still forming, he looks so much less like the generic bundle she brought home from the hospital.

He makes a sound that doesn't resemble anything, it's just a soft, happy noise, and he reaches over to touch Rachel's face. His hand lands on her lips and she kisses his tiny hand until he starts giggling. He's such a happy baby, always seems to be smiling, and he really isn't that much of a crier. Sure, he gets fussy when he's sleepy but that's nothing a pacifier and a few minutes in his swing won't fix. She's noticed that he's very curious about his surroundings, very studious of them, and just seems content. She figures this comes from Noah because her fathers would not stop reiterating how easy Evan was compared to her when they had watched him a few weeks back. "You've been over the top and dramatic since you came out of Shelby," he dad had laughed as Evan snuggled into Quinn's chest.

His hand falls away from her mouth, yawning a little before releasing another soft vocalization. Her smile gets wider, if that's even possible, and she doesn't say anything, just makes a senseless noise back, laughing when Evan responds by making a spit bubble. His eyes go wide when the small bubble pops before he laughs again, shrieking in delight when Rachel picks him up and lays him on her chest. He pulls on her tank top and seems torn between looking at her and laying his head against her chest. In the end, he lays down, pulling her tank top tighter in his fist but she ruins it by hiccupping and he looks up at her confused. "Sorry baby." Another hiccup follows, and he looks down at her chest, letting go of her shirt before she presses a kiss into Evan's temple and laying him down on his back. She sits up and chugs about half of the water on the bedside table, thankful that it seems to halt the hiccups.

Evan's now inspecting his feet, clutching one in each hand as he bends and un-bends his legs. He keeps "talking" and Rachel is surprised to see that her son's now staring at her and not his legs. His eyebrows are raised, looking at her expectantly, as if he asked her a question and is waiting for the answer. "I'm sorry baby. I wasn't listening." She almost feels ridiculous that she's speaking to her son like he actually understands her. Evan babbles once more and she happily plays along, taking his tiny feet into her own hands. "Yes, these are your feet and I promise you'll actually use them when you're older." She runs her thumbs over the bottoms of his feet softly, laughing when Evan starts kicking his legs, a large smile on his face. "They might always be this ticklish though," she says through a laugh before letting go of his feet.

She leans forward and smooths down his thick, dark brown hair. He looks like a little old man the way it's parted and she's told Quinn before that it resembles an unfortunate comb over. Her wife had simply rolled her eyes and continued to part his hair. "He looks dapper!" Rachel had snorted, something that turned into full fledged laughter when Noah suggests they get him a monocle.

Sometimes Rachel thinks they were crazy to have Evan now, because they can all still act like the world's biggest kids (because, really, they did get him a monocle, dressed him in a sweater vest, and perfected his comb over and then took as many pictures as they could before he eventually stuck the monocle in his mouth), even if they are 24. In reality, her partners in crime had already been parents for 8 years and Rachel had been parenting for 6. Holly has given them their fair share of problems, making them all more than ready for another child. At the end of the day, she's glad that they do crazy things like that with their kids because she wants to have these glorious memories with them.

She lets out another content sigh as Evan's feet kick against her still stretched stomach and his hands wrap around her index fingers. "I love you Evan," she breathes out, her cheeks hurting from smiling so much.

"Are you still not tired of him yet?" She looks up to find Santana leaning into her doorway, eyebrow arched and her own son on her hip.

"Shut up Lopez. I've never done this before." She looks back down at her son, smiling when she notices him looking back at the door, trying in vain to roll over. He's been so close for weeks now. He just needs that one extra push …

Santana plops down on Quinn's side of the bed, keeping Mac in her lap and quietly explaining that he has to be careful. "He's new and you have to be gentle okay?" Mac is exactly one year and one day older than Evan. Rachel felt horrible that she ruined Mac's first birthday party (her water actually broke in the middle of the kitchen and Santana had slipped in it), especially since she didn't give birth till the next morning. Brittany had assured her that it was okay but once Rachel gave birth, Santana told her she was replacing her jeans.

"What're you doing here," Rachel asks, eyeing the other boy cautiously as he scoots towards Evan. He keeps looking between her, Evan, and his mother, like he's about to get in trouble. Rachel smiles supportively, though her outstretched leg curls a little closer around Evan. She completely trusts Mac but she has this overwhelming urge to protect her son at all costs. She gets this way with Holly too, especially now that she's gotten bigger and has started to become exceptionally independent. Her daughter is eight and that is in fact old enough to cross the street without holding someone's hand, but Rachel still reaches for it because it's not that she doesn't trust Holly, she doesn't trust careless drivers. Everyone tells her she's over protective but she can't help it. This is her family. Sometimes she even grabs Noah's hand when they cross the street because he has this annoying habit of jaywalking and it kills her when he does it.

"Brittany went off with your clan this morning. Said to meet her here because apparently they're making breakfast." Santana scoots a little closer, just so she can reach Mac better in case something does happen (she's pretty sure Rachel doesn't know that Mac's has this sort of, unintentional, spitting problem. She thinks it has something to do with the fact that he's teething and still missing one of his front teeth). Evan turns to look at the young boy, babbling to him while still trying to flip on to his stomach.

"It's almost 10!" Evan huffs and falls back on to his back.

"That's only late to you, Rachel." She watches as Mac touches the small embroidered duck on Evan's onesie.

"Duck!" Santana's smile is warm as she nods.

"What sound does the duck make?" Her son quacks loudly and it scares Evan a little because he jerks and starts reaching for Rachel. The "new" mother scoops up her son quickly and Evan barely even whines before he's back to looking at Mac curiously. "Sorry 'bout that."

Rachel shakes her head, looking at Mac. "Do you know what sound a cow makes?" He looks at her confused and she glances around the room before finding the stuffed animal on her bedside table. She holds up the toy for Mac to see. "Cow goes…"

"Moo!" This time Evan doesn't jump, just laughs and tucks his head under her chin as he clutches on to her shirt again.

She's not sure she's seen Santana look so proud. She wonders if she gets that kind of look on her face every time Evan does something. "Good job mijo." He crawls back into Santana's lap, almost mirroring the way Evan hangs on her.

Rachel relaxes against the headboard, closing her eyes as she drops a kiss into Evan's hair. She loves the way he smells. It's a mixture of baby shampoo, milk, the newborn smell all babies seem to have, and then there's something that she can't place. It's unique to him and she's not sure why but it reminds Rachel that this beautiful, amazing, baby boy is hers. "Hey." She turns her head, resting her cheek on the top of her son's head as she looks at Santana. "I was the same way when he was born."

"I didn't think I'd be so bad because of Holly. I'm already a mom but it feels different."

Santana nods. "I didn't really think I'd be able to love someone else as much as I loved Brittany but he has completely changed that."

Rachel gives her a lazy smile. "I like it when you're all sentimental."

Santana wrinkles her nose and rolls her eyes. "You still owe me a pair of jeans."

She hears the front door open and suddenly the apartment isn't quiet. It's loud and she's pretty sure she hears something break before Brittany yells, "Oh. The magic trick turned out differently yesterday." She looks at Santana with a raised brow and the other woman just sighs heavily and shrugs. Quinn walks through the doorway then, looking completely uncomfortable.

"Have you fed him yet?" Rachel shakes her head and glances at the clock next to her. It's definitely time for a feeding and she realizes quickly why Quinn looks like she's in pain.

"That's my cue to go. I don't feel like seeing a tit that isn't my wife's today." Quinn stops the duo before the leave the room completely so she can press a kiss into each of Mac's cheeks. Santana shuts the door behind her and Quinn already has her shirt over her head as she sits in the spot Santana just vacated. Rachel can't fight the frown on her face when she hands Evan to his mother and Quinn grabs her hand.

"I know you were bonding but my boobs are aching." The hiss that leaves her parted lips is half in pain and half in relief. Evan suckles eagerly and Rachel rests against Quinn's side, her head falling on to Quinn's shoulder as she runs her fingers over Evan's legs. "Did you have a nice morning?"

She nods against her wife. "Did you ever just look at Holly when she was a baby and think, wow?"

Quinn laughs lightly and then kisses Rachel's head. "I look at every one of you everyday and say that. We really are blessed Rach."

Rachel's never been particularly religious but she's not sure she could find a better word to describe her wonderful family. "I love you."

She looks up to see Quinn smiling widely, looking down at their son. "I love you too."