To those of you who bother to take the time to read the author's notes, this one is important.

I'm an honest soul, so I will be upfront with my time constraints. I do not plan on being very predictable with my release dates, as I tend to write as the urge hits me, which can be good or bad compared to other writers who procrastinate. That being said, I'm intent on seeing this fanfic through to the end.

Now, for those of you interesting in moving forward and giving this fic a chance, let me give a brief synopsis. This fic centers around the journeys of a cowardly, socially awkward boy who gets entangled in a plot to destroy the digital world. And yes, this is a Digimon fanfic. As a precursing note, I will be attempting to link each of the separate timelines into an epic conclusion, disregarding the Digimon games and in some cases altering the basic timeframes of the different seasons. Without further ado, enjoy!

DISCLAIMER: Digimon is owned by Akiyoshi Hongo, Toei Animation, WIZ, and Bandai. Please support the official release(s).

There is a cosmic brilliance, dwindling amidst the chromatic clouds and shuddering stars only beginning to breath. Sometimes we wonder what that brilliance means to us scientifically, but only because we want to know everything.

In the grand scheme of things, sometimes, we need to recognize that our understanding means nothing more than a fleeting glimpse of knowledge. Whether we know everything or not, we are still insignificant sparks...

...or are we?

In so far as knowledge is concerned, humans are so needy, and jealous. Why can't they ever slow down, admire things for the way they are, and work with the barest of facts to form an enriched lifestyle? As I observed them, I noticed that humans are creatures seeking happiness, an endearment at their very core disregarding anything they say. Sure, they sometimes work out an impressive number of distracting doctrines and mask their desires with beliefs, but only a few of them can ever truly live up to such vocations. Those are the persons I would call rare, unique, and entirely insane.

But humans have a... strange ability, to suppress themselves.

At first it wasn't obvious, but eventually I began to see a cycle in their daily lives, which permeated those doctrines without exception. It started out as a division of status, then it became a social cruelty, until it eventually began an invisible paradigm, ruling and dictating everything around it. Humans sometimes caught sight of it, and they would call it... expectation.

The human eye makes distinctions between what it sees, and what it wants to see. It does this all the time, unless disciplined, which is why it is so hard to make out. It happened so naturally, that it has been somewhat pardoned of scrutiny.

Then I realized that expectation and knowledge are part of the same crisis.

That humanity seeks happiness, yet it expects anything but.

What a strange, and cruel paradox.

Most of them have no idea, that what they are seeking does not match what they are doing at all. They suppress those things about themselves and others that truly make them a beautiful social species, capable of many great achievements, because their lust for justice drives them to ignore the simpler things. To meet the end they call 'happiness', they force themselves to suffer, hoping that a time will come when their efforts will finally have payed off. This is a self-inflicted slavery, nothing more or less, that they insist on justifying because of the 'progress' they are convinced is permeating that punishment. In a way, unfortunately, they are correct.

And yet... if they were to stop slaving in this way, all at once, humanity would be destroyed. Freedom of the mind causes provisional progress to suffer; in some sense the abolition of one cruelty for the admission of a greater one. That is primarily evident by how far the system has come, and even if it hadn't, it would eventually. The sorrowful truth is that mankind likens provisional progress to their own happiness, and cannot see it any other way, despite the fact that it ceases to be provisional the moment their needs have been provided. Instead it becomes a safeguard for their future, and the excess of that safeguard is turned about and vented onto a temporary 'happiness', only for them to discover that their safeguards are meaningless as the 'progress' they made has caught up to them, revealing new necessities which require new provisional standards and safeguards, all of it ultimately perpetuating the cycle. And like any spoiled child, once those provisions, safeguard or not, have been taken away, they will fight tooth and nail to get it back. This is how mankind divides itself, therefore I wouldn't waste time wanting it.

So, rather than wish for something cruel to end, I am content to watch them, the masters of Earth, and observing those people whom I consider rare. A few of them sprout up here and there, some horrible beyond compare, others benevolent saints. They brought change to the world, each and every one of them.

They have become... interesting to me.

In the past I have often found myself agreeing with human morality. I cannot place the origin of my own consciousness, and therefore I have no say in the content of my soul or heart if they exist, but to me these creatures are without doubt the greatest of species to be found, despite their shortcomings. The same ability that allows them to regress, is also their tool to evolve. An evolving race in mentality and morality, though somewhat lacking physically. That cannot really be helped though.

My hours are spent seeing everything there is to see, unable to interact with it, and above all, protect it. Although, it is a passive protection. My existence is like an impervious blanket, and so I am unable to act in any way for myself, but I can still see. I can watch.

Today, as I dwell in my secret place, I watch a particular boy.

His name... is Toshiro.

Prologue: The Color of Loneliness

"BZZZZZZZ...BZZZZZZZ!"

Toshiro, shocked by the sudden burst of sound into the quiet morning air, jolted upright, wide awake insofar as his hatred of the device drove him. Groggily he reached over with one arm, and pressed down upon a certain button fitted to the contraption. The noise abruptly ceased, and a tranquil but heavy silence replaced it. He yawned widely, before throwing off the comforting blanket that held him there, and didn't want to let go, resulting in multiple attempts.

Dreary as teenagers are in the morning, and most likely would be for another hour, Toshiro looked over to the alarm clock, confirming to himself that the time did in fact read 7:30 and it wasn't a cruel joke or malfunction.

He yawned once more.

Feeling that he had overstayed his welcome and that he would make his guardians unhappy if he tried to oversleep, Toshiro urged the effort into his legs in order to slide them over the ridge of his single bed, and plant them gingery upon the oaken floor. As the rest of his body followed, Toshiro noticed a strange flickering feeling in his stomach, not unlike a nervous jolt, but far less friendly. He sat down briefly, grimacing as the jolt coursed throughout his body before subsiding after about a minute. His breathing was heavy, eyes winced, as he stood back up.

"For the love of... not again."

Groaning, Toshiro walked to the center of his rather spacious room, and selected a book from a black shelf next to his closet.

The room was originally intended for guests, and ever since he took up residence in the house thirteen years ago, he'd kept that intention in mind, despite the fact that none of the other residents had ever considered him anything less than family. At least, not to his knowledge. Regardless, he wanted the best for his surrogates, and so he sought to please them even in this mundane fashion. Everything was tidy and neat, arranged symmetrically as it were, and even his closet was well ordered to this effect. The books on this particular shelf were arranged alphabetically, all except for one. This one book, a brown leather-bound journal, that he used for his... personal, problems. Wielding a pen from his nearby desk, he sat down to write his latest entry, speaking aloud the words he transcribed them.

Dear Diary:

October 1st_ Another nervous attack today. I still

don't know why they keep happening... it's starting

to frighten me. What if the effects never wear

off? Is it just going to keep getting worse?

I can't tell my family. I know I should,

but I can't. My mouth doesn't open when I

try to talk... my heart starts pounding.

Maybe I will get better soon; Mrs Tengi says

that all illnesses are cured eventually. I'm not a

doctor, so I have to trust her.

Shrugging off the lingering effects from the attack, Toshiro put down his pen, and closed the journal. He lay back into his chair, staring into infinity, as he wondered a frequent question of late.

How should he go about fixing this problem?

He knew it wasn't normal. All of his internet searches had come up with inconclusive results that didn't make any sense to him, nor did they really apply to his condition. Library books weren't much better.

"Toshiro-kun? Breakfast is ready!"

The frown on his face turned to a slight smile. One thing he appreciated from his surrogates was their enduring love for him, despite how odd he must seem to them. A frail, quiet, and wimpish boy with no hobbies or dreams. Finally resolving to move on from his thoughts, Toshiro changed into his school uniform, and made his way downstairs at a good pace.

Sitting at table there, in the brightness of the morning light filtered by a stain-glass window, were three people. A girl, about his age, and a delightful couple who stared at him with beaming smiles. Shy as he was, Toshiro could only look at the floor and blush slightly as they addressed him. First was the father.

"Rise and shine Toshiro, a little later than usual too. Probably a good thing, considering."

His wife immediately slapped him, although gently, upon his shoulder.

"That's enough Ken. Hurry up Shiro, before Eve takes all of the eggs."

As if in defiance of their suggestion, the younger girl hugged the platter of sunny-side-up eggs closer to her own plate, her mouth full and eyes glaring at him in mock refusal, daring him to take them away. Laughing humorously at her antics, her mother coaxed the eggs out of her grasp.

The blush disappeared from his cheeks, and he removed a stray lock from his eyes as he reached the table, and seated himself on a more unoccupied corner of the round table.

As breakfast progressed, with Toshiro maintaining his quiet demeanor, a much taller girl walked through the kitchen where they ate, practically strutting with a confident rhythm. A backpack was strapped to her shoulders, and it somehow parted an otherwise perfect stream of blond hair. Her hands quickly reached for the front door, which was situated in the center of the room adjacent to the kitchen with no division between them. Before the handle could be reached however, her attention was directed to the hasty inquiry of her father.

"Aren't you going to enjoy breakfast before you head out today, Yui?"

The identified daughter turned a quick glance at the man who had just taken his head out of the newspaper, and delivered an exasperated response. "I told you last night dad, I'm needed at the college early today. Besides, I already ate before you sat down."

"Of course sweetheart. Have fun at school, and drive safe."

"Bye Yui!"

Yui smiled at her younger sister, then gave Toshiro a good long glance. As she had expected his expression was downcast, but still he had offered to watch her leave. If nothing else it was progress. "Stay strong, Toshiro. Cya!"

With those words, she quickly opened the glass door, slipped through it, and shut it behind her. While the family resumed their breakfast, which at this time was nearing its end, Toshiro turned his eyes back

to the table and away from the door whence his surrogate sister had departed. Some things never changed. Even if he wanted them to. The voices around the table were drowned out by his own thoughts, once again stuck in his own world. Mild Autism, ADD, and a few phobias... these were all things he had to deal with.

It was eating him from the inside out, never being able to express himself.

The journal he kept was the only true way he could put his thoughts to action. More than the encouraging words of his guardians, or the amicable attempts made by Yui and Eve both, more than the doctors and specialists and even more than action itself. Nothing else worked for him.

Dear Diary:

October 1st (Continued)_Today I learned something;

that I will never be able to truly make friends.

...

Not for the first time, as Toshiro walked silently from the family car that had dropped him off at school, the boy felt the loneliness of life weighing upon his shoulders. He couldn't hope to remember his real parents, who had left him alone almost fourteen years ago, and for as long as he could remember he had been different. A misfit. A black sheep.

The curb soon became a long sidewalk, and to each side children bounded into view of his downcast eyes, tossing one ball or another, playing tag or shouting excitedly. To his left was the public parking lot across the street, to his right was the main school entrance, leading upward and downward to different levels via stairwells, accessed by wide glass doors. The building was mainly brickwork with some homely flares of decoration, but it was deceptively small on the outside. Further in he knew the gyms would explode in size, and even the classrooms were homely... but nothing so thrilling that he could ever feel excited to attend. He re-adjusted his lightly packed school bag, dull grey in color, and headed for the entrance, never even noticing those few among the children who bothered to look his way.

...

School, the necessary cruelty. These days it meant nothing more than a nuisance, where his autistic and cowardly nature became all too apparent, despite how feverishly he desired to keep his faults hidden and locked away.

And yet, sitting at his desk in the rather monochromatic and rectangular room of his first class, Toshiro couldn't find reasons to complain. Complaining was something he didn't do very often, but when he did, it was mostly non-verbal, especially when in public. That being said, he did take issue with the ceaseless noise happening around him, like a hive full of hornets with nothing better to do. He covered his ears with both hands, his chin practically touching the desk, while he waited patiently for class to begin.

"Why is it so loud..." He asked himself, under his breath. The atmosphere in the classroom about him was electric, brimming with excitement for some scientific speaker making an appearance that day.

"You mean you don't know?"

Toshiro nearly jumped out of his skin. He turned his head sharply to the right, looking at the pristine face of a newly integrated highborn girl with well groomed blond hair and a short pigtail. Of course he knew exactly what the occasion was, but being young and socially awkward, he had no words to speak. Therefor, she took it into her own hands to explain the situation. "I heard there's a speaker coming in today named Takeo Hishimoto, he's going to be talking about the discoveries made on the Digital Catastrophe last year. Isn't that exciting?"

"Not really..." Toshiro spoke it quietly, imagining that it wouldn't be heard, but naturally the girl picked it out and immediately became appalled.

"What? How could you say that?"

"Hey Erena, what are you complaining about?"

Toshiro could feel an even larger headache forming when a familiar redhead girl strolled over to their desks. Her name was Ageta Sazo as he recalled, but it wasn't a name he favored. At her side was her brother Gin, who over the years as a shadow to his sister had formed an idol of her. Responding to the new arrival, Erena calmed herself and made her reply.

"I'm just surprised is all, that he didn't know or care about the presentation today."

Much to Erena's surprise, this came as a shock to Ageta and Gin. Both turned to look at the downcast expression on Toshiro's face, laid close to the desk, and Ageta commented quite crudely on the matter.

"Wow, I've been at this school for almost 3 years, and only three times have I ever heard him say anything like that. Congratulations Erena, you made the class reject do something unexpected. Take my advice though, he isn't worth your time. He's basically everyones scapegoat and isn't good for anything else. C'mon Gin, class will be starting soon."

The duo strolled back to their seats, and fell about whispering an odd rumor or two betwixt friends. Meanwhile, Erena sat stunned, peering aghast at Toshiro, who looked to all the world as though he couldn't care less.

But that wasn't the case. Not by a long shot. Still, he couldn't complain about it. Not at all. The things said about him, be they true or untrue, were not really up to him, and he was fine with that. He felt nothing ill towards the persons who denounced him, because in the moments when he considered how he saw himself, what they said usually matched his own perception.

…

Classes did as they always did; they came and they went. When at last the awaited moment arrived, when the proclaimed expert on digital extremities was to arise and deliver his speech, Toshiro knew what he would be doing and where. He would sit at the back of the auditorium rows, he would sink into his own world, and he would drown everything else out. This was his usual routine, broken only when something was required of him.

The auditorium was spacious indeed but not tall, leaving a wide breath for seats but no sound dynamic. It was for this reason that several speakers were installed throughout the room. One hung directly above him he knew, but it didn't bother him every once in a while to pay attention, in the hopes that something his mind could properly analyze would surface.

In the setbacks presented by his conditions, one of the many manifestations of frustration came in the form of emotion. He could never truly understand them, because to him they made themselves known not as a feeling but as a face, as a bodily response. Happiness, the thing that makes people smile. Sadness, the anomaly that takes a smile away, and causes the eye to deepen.

He could tell... sitting there, watching his classmates interacting, that happiness was present amongst them.

Their eyes were alight with laughter.

He reached out with his hand, a ghostly breath tickling his throat, as he desperately tried to take hold of that happiness for himself. But he felt nothing. Clenching his hand, he withdrew within himself, and sat back while the auditorium slowly grew silent.

All was silent, for him, right at this moment.

He looked to his hand again, hoping to see some sparkle of light that he'd imagined happiness to represent, perhaps even the slightest shade to make him feel included with the archetype known as the human being.

Voices, around him, rose and fell.

Faintly he could make out the rough pretentious inklings of words, lingering out of his reach, and he longed, desired, yearned, to hear them. Not just to hear them, to understand them. So, he leaned forward, peering out with his distant expression to lay his eyes upon a smartly dressed gentleman at the podium, his pointer carefully aimed at an angle toward the images provided by a projector.

He saw the screen, and all at once, his mind became clear.

At last! Something had drawn his attention!

It had been months since he'd felt this way... this was, excitement! Happiness of a different name, but happiness all the same. Giddy inside, he smiled. Boy, did he smile! Because there on the screen was the prospect of more than a few dreams in recent memory. The figure of a dragon, wrapping its coiled body around the planet, with the words 'Calamity' written under it. His ears could suddenly hear everything. It all made sense.

"...and of course, most if not all of you are aware of the situation regarding the phenomenon currently described as the 'Calamity Cipher', but for those of you who might be out of the loop, allow me a brief moment to explain."

Here the speaker placed a Wireless Stencil upon a tablet on the podium, and began to illustrate a few objects on a white panel that replaced the former caricature. The first objects he drew were a computer, and a depiction Toshiro could only assume represented a bookshelf.

"Now, when we think of the electronic world, what's the first thing that pops into your head? Any volunteers?"

A hand raised, followed by a response that Toshiro couldn't make out. The speaker smiled, nodded, and returned to the mic, whilst illustrating each point he made with helpful artwork.

"The Internet! Of course, right? The internet is used every day by over 80% of the world, estimated at about 5 billion people. This is because the internet is the ultimate form of globalization, connecting people to each other across immense distances. Satellites create electronic roads that connect data libraries, and programs are librarians that structure and rearrange those libraries to seem cohesive, even pulling out certain pieces of information when needed.

Unfortunately, much like pre-adolescent pranksters, viruses may sometimes come and corrupt the libraries, making the cohesive structures collapse or behave erratically, and sometimes even altering the very books on the shelf of a digital library. In the past, viruses have been known to purge data completely, and this is an increasingly prominent issue as the world of computers expands, despite all the effort we put into countermeasures."

The speaker erased the board, and moved on to create some strange symbols that Toshiro identified as the viruses.

"Fast forward to modern day Japan, six months ago on the 15th of March. An aspiring intern at the Hayaburi Institute noticed a glitch in their systems, which was very subtle but entirely random. In normal cases a virus is formed by a violent bit of corrupted code, sometimes intentionally by hackers, but viruses will always need to break down or bypass firewalls in order to cause any damage. This is why it startled the world when the intern discovered that, not only was there a powerful virus destroying data in an unpredictable fashion, but it had reached their libraries without ever coming into contact with their firewalls. By that I mean they never even crossed the library thresholds. They simply… teleported, for lack of a better word, into the isles of our libraries, and began wrecking havoc."

The groups of children began muttering, causing the teachers to attempt a restoration of balance. Toshiro himself began to ponder this information, despite the fact that he'd never really dealt with or been interested in basic digital principles in the first place. Something about this phenomenon intrigued him, genetically even. He couldn't help how curious he was.

"Ahem. This brings about a startling realization: that there is a virus occurring here that cannot be stopped by the best digital defenses known to man, and destroys all forms of data it encounters, without spreading too contagiously, thank God. Unfortunately, but also most interestingly, this is not the first time the virus has struck. Thanks to this discovery, inquiries were made into old archives and the archives of other companies, all of them discovering one frightening result: that this virus was attacking everywhere and nowhere at the same time, as if at random. Furthermore, thanks to deep searches, it was discovered that similar albeit smaller purges went under the radar 10 and 20 years before hand, once again striking randomly and without warning.

As of right now, we have no idea what the cause is or how to stop it, but preliminary speculation suggests that the virus is no large threat to society as of yet. Still, its destructive nature has earned it the title; 'Calamity Cipher', with regards to the fear of a worst case scenario. Ah, yes, you have a question?"

Toshiro didn't know what he was doing, raising his hand like that. He hastily pulled it down, his heart racing. He had no idea what to say! Quickly the weight of a thousand imagined eyes turning to him, overbearing him while he stuttered. Toshiro shut his eyes, awaiting the taunts or laughs...

Instead, he heard a girl speaking.

"Well, Hishimoto-san, I was wondering... is there any threat to civilians?"

Toshiro felt his heart cave a little, as a wave of relief shuddered his body. Maybe his hand was ignored, and hers just happened to be up at the same time? What a lucky break! Takeo nodded at her question.

"A threat to civilians you say? Well, the virus mostly attacks large data vaults, so the larger the library the more danger it's in you could say. Whether or not you ascribe to one of those libraries is anyone's guess, but thankfully Data Mass Backing is being fully implemented to counter the Cipher, so your personal information should be relatively secure. Any more questions?"

Sitting there by himself, Toshiro had to wonder if anyone felt as he did, because in the span of the ten minutes it took to explain the Calamity Cipher... he felt sick to the stomach. Was the presentation to blame for that feeling? He could only guess. Questions rolled by, none of them giving him cause to worry or think, but one thing the speaker said near to the end of his presentation stuck with him, and would remain stuck for a long while.

"This concludes my presentation on the Digital Catastrophe. As a final note, I would ask everyone here to consider this final question, that I ask every assembly I visit."

His gaze swept over the anxious students, falling, shockingly, on Toshiro.

"What will you be doing, when Calamity strikes?"

Those words, the stare, and something underneath it all... Toshiro felt it pressing against his soul. Something was stirring, something dangerous was in the wind. He could feel it.

He could just feel it.

Without even knowing it, Toshiro was lost deep in thought while the students around him filed out for the day, intent on reaching the safety of home. Toshiro didn't even notice when the eyes of a concerned person lingered near to him, worry plastered therein, only to move on with the crowd. He clutched a hand to his heart when the beating began.

Thump.

'God...! It's happening again!'

Thump.

Jolting upright suddenly, Toshiro frantically pushed his way through the students, trying desperately to reach the bathroom. Too insignificant to be noticed by his classmates, too small to be bothered by teachers, his hands finally grasped the handles of the stenciled wooden door, opened it, closed it, and gasped in a painful intake of air.

Thump.

He clutched at his heart. It was racing, pulsing, throbbing. It was far worse than he'd ever experienced before. Pain, a sharp lasting pain, shot through his body multiple times like jolting shocks of lightning.

It hurt, god did it hurt.

His cries never even left his mouth, because he couldn't find the strength to breath. The fear of death, tightening like a noose. But he didn't give in. Slowly but surely his breath returned, and the pain subsided. Even though he realized that the danger had passed, he couldn't stop shaking. His emotions were threatening to overflow, but he reigned them in, knowing that nobody would pity his tears.

Because there was no one he could turn to

...

Toshrio didn't spend too long sitting there in that room, or else somebody would have found him, or asked questions, especially with his carpool hanging around waiting to pick him up and bring him home. His thoughts and emotions were chaotic at best, swirling up inside him and confusing him, having suffered through the foreboding signs he felt at the presentation, and the extremely worrying attacks to his body.

"Twice in one day... and far worse than usual." He muttered to himself, taking out his journal to record the thoughts. He sat upright at his locker, the other students filing out of the main school entrance to end there day with a bit of fun. Toshiro knew that carpool would come looking for him within half an hour, so he used that time to despair, continually muttering his thoughts to himself.

"Am I going to die?"

…

"What are you doing sitting there, kid?"

Toshiro looked up to see a high-schooler leaning over him, a confused frown on his face, and two friends at his side. Gagging, Toshiro tried to deliver an excuse, but was unable to before the friendlies interrupted.

"Hey, you're that kid in the third years that I've been hearing about."

Toshiro's heart began racing.

"Yeah, that weirdo coward from the freshman class who can't do anything right. Hey, are those rumors right or not man? Cmon, if they aren't at least try to defend yourself."

"I... I'm not..." He knew what was coming. It happened so many times before.

The apparent leader grabbed him forcefully by the shoulder. "Guess the rumors are true huh, well, frankly it's embarrassing going to the same school as a kid like you. People are going to say that I came from the same school as the dumbest coward known to man." The leader shoved him against the locker painfully, staring murder into his eyes.

"You'd best leave the school or change your stride kid, or you won't live long in the real world. It disgusts me seeing kids like you."

He dropped Toshiro on the ground, and walked off steaming with his friends, who looked as if they might've regretting speaking out against the boy. Toshiro picked himself up once they'd gone, a choking sensation bubbling up in his throat, but again he suppressed it.

They were right, after all. He was a worthless nobody, who couldn't do anything for himself, much less others.

There was silence, and loneliness for him now.

Because he had no one to turn to.

He was alone.

...

...

And yet...

A noise.

"Toshiro!"

His name? Toshiro glanced upward to see the girl from his class, Erena as he recalled walking up to him with a strange curving smile on her face. She extended a hand to him, and in the briefest of moments, Toshiro felt something new and entirely foreign to him surface in his heart, when she spoke out to him, her smile never fading.

Those words would forever stay with him, marking the first time in his miserable existence when he truly loved life, because he had finally felt the one emotion he'd missed. The one thing he could never achieve on his own. He could swear he finally saw it, the light of happiness shining from her, and he felt it himself. A distinct, beautiful warmth that encompassed him, and transformed him.

...

...

"Would you like to be friends with me, Toshiro?"

Even in the dark alleyways of the pariah, the grey melancholy of life, even wallowing in the color of loneliness... Toshiro learned, that day, that light still found a way. A way, to make him smile.

So ends the prologue to this story. As any respectable fanfic writer would say, constructive criticism is always appreciated and encouraged. Be sure to tell me what you think of the direction of the story. Peace out.