This began as a Valentine's present for Methodical Madness, and I just had to share it, so... Enjoy the crack.

The Tower, when Ika finally clapped eyes on it from her seat in the back of the cab, was far taller than she had initially thought. Sure, she reasoned, it was The Avengers' tower, but… Well. She was used to the one Jarvis lived in, and this was more like a monument (to Tony's ego) their good deeds than it was a simple "tower".

"Maybe he's compensating for something?" Ika suggested to the blond beside her, the older girl completely engrossed in her book and ignoring their surroundings entirely. "Stark, I mean. Clearly there's something not-quite-right with that man's noggin."

"Well you're probably right." Mizuki agreed, shrugging. "But he's kinda like the cool uncle you want to bang, so I'm not complaining."

Ika's head whipped around so fast she was surprised she didn't hear anything snap. "I don't recall ever having uncles like that, thank you very much."

"You didn't?" Her tone bordered on utter disbelief. "I did."

"Mi-chan!" The blond quirked her eyebrows, waiting, and received her answer from the brunette soon after, accompanied by a wicked grin. "You vixen, you!"

She grinned, winked at her companion, and went back to her book. Ika, meanwhile, went back to watching the city creep by as horns blared and people yelled indistinctly to one another on the crowded streets.

"Tell me again why he didn't just come pick us up?" She prompted after a few more minutes of silence.

"Ika. If you had two outsiders coming to your place, would you want to pick them up in flashy style or let them creep in all inconspicuous like?"

"…point taken."

"Besides, he's busy. You know, saving this thing called the world. Big stuff, apparently. Not that I'd know." She sniffed, grinned, and glanced out the window. "Although he could have at least sent one of the cars that flies… This traffic is absurd."

"We could walk." Ika suggested, half-serious and half-joking, because they were still roughly six blocks from the enormous structure, and it was six blocks of hell.

"Steve would never let us hear the end of it." Mizuki replied. "Actually, neither would Tony."

"How many of these heroes do you know, anyway?" She hadn't had the chance to ask her on the flight over (on an airplane with people and ugh!), and only just realized she'd never found out from the blond how many of the Avengers she was acquainted with.

"Oh, uh…" She trailed off lamely, trying to hide behind her book. "You know. Most of them."

"Most?"

There was a pause of about thirty seconds in which Ika knew Mizuki was trying to avoid blushing and failing horribly. How she could make cracks about banging uncles and still get embarrassed by getting called out for knowing someone, Ika couldn't comprehend.

"Tony lets me crash at his place when I need to tinker and think and I may or may not have crashed myself into his workshop at one point and Banner had to fix me up, and then I kinda-sorta had a run in with a piece of alien tech and got bound to life to Thor, and then they sent me birthday presents, and Tony showed up with cars and a motorcycle, and Steve wanted to take me dancing, and it's really complicated, okay?!"

"…I don't see any alien tech."

Mizuki glared at her over the top of her book, daring her to make any further comment. When none came, the blond rolled her eyes. "I had Loki enchant it so you can't see it. It's a big bulky bracer thing. Gets in the way if I don't keep the spell on it."

"So when you say bound for life, do you mean in a matrimonial sense, or…?"

"Ika! No!"

"Cause that's a gig I could fully support. I mean, what would that make you? Princess of Asgard? That'd be cool; to know a princess."

"I am not married to Thor."

"Yet~"

Mizuki hid her face in her hands, sighing deeply. "Odin helps us get to the tower soon…"

"Don't you mean Allfather-in-law~?"

Ika was starting to think she was going to get neck strain from staring up at the tower, but a light tug on her arm pulled her back down to earth, and she followed a grinning Mizuki around to a side door that was tucked behind a convenient amount of shrubberies.

"I feel like we're sneaking into the pentagon!"

"That would probably be easier." Mizuki replied dryly, pressing her thumb to a keypad by the door.

"Hello, Miss Sakamoto, how are you this afternoon?" A pleasant British voice rang out from above them, and a tiny camera peeked out to look them both over. "A pleasant journey, I hope?"

"Pleasant enough; thank you Jarvis." Mizuki replied with a wave, tapping in a code to the keypad. "Would you mind telling Tony we're here? This is Ika Zachaire, she's with me."

"Of course, Mr. Stark mentioned you bringing a friend with you for your visit." Ika was certain that if the camera had eyes, they would have narrowed as it peered at her. "Mr. Stark and Captain Rogers have both been alerted to your arrival. If you have need of anything, please do not hesitate to ask." The lock clicked out of place, and the door swung open, revealing a long corridor of chrome and glass beyond.

Mizuki pulled Ika in through the door, and led her along the hallway, stopping when they reached an elevator. Again, she entered her code and fingerprint, and the doors dinged open cheerily. Once inside, she pushed the appropriate button, and leaned back against the wall.

"So you know the virtual butler too, huh?" Ika teased with a grin as they quickly scaled the building.

"That's inevitable." She shot back. "Jarvis knows everyone."

The doors dinged open again, and Ika was greeted with a view of a gigantic den, large windows looking out over the city, and two bars on either side of the space. Couches and chairs were laid out with tables, and the place had a cozy well-lived-in feel too it.

"Ladies!" Thor's booming voice was unmistakable, and Ika jumped when she spotted the God of Thunder beaming at them from across the room. He was by her side in a flash, scooping them both up into a colossal hug, a chuckle (unsurprisingly) like thunder rumbling out of him and right into their bones. "It is very good to see you both once more!"

Mizuki giggled, returning the hug with as much force as she could muster while being half-crushed against an Ika. "It's wonderful to see you too, Thor."

"Okay, okay, let the girl breathe, wouldja?" A different voice spoke from behind the booming blond, and both girls were carefully set back down to earth as Thor moved away, revealing a familiar archer sulking in a hoodie. "Leave some for the rest of us… Jeez."

"Hey Clint." Mizuki gave him a shy smile, only moving in for a hug when he opened his arms and beckoned her over.

"Who's the new girl?" He asked, pressing a quick kiss to the top of her head that he hoped no one noticed, jerking his chin toward the interloping brunette.

"This is Ika. She's a very dear friend."

"Nice to meet you, Ika. Clint Barton." He offered her his hand, smiling. "Any friend of Mizuki's is a friend of ours."

"Usually, anyway." A softer voice joined the other two, and a bespectacled brunette wandered into view. "Mizuki." He greeted with a soft smile and a nod, but made no move to hug her. "And Ika, yes? Bruce Banner, nice to meet you."

Ika bobbed her head, not offering her hand when she realized his reluctance to offer his own, and earned a soft smile of her own for the consideration.

"Where are Tony and Steve?" Mizuki asked, before she turned to Clint. "And where's Natasha?"

"Tasha had a mission." Clint gave a little hop of his shoulders that, coupled with his expression, almost seemed apologetic. "No idea where Tin-Man and Wing-Head are."

"That's no way to talk about your elders, Clint." Tony chimed in, appearing from another elevator. "Think how Cap would feel, hearing you disrespecting the elderly, like that?"

"Not half as bad as he'll be feeling if he doesn't apologize." Steve added, popping up behind Tony.

Tony laughed, making a bee-line for Mizuki and scooping her into a hug. She returned it with a laugh, before she moved to give Steve a much more subdued one.

"Good to see you again, Ika." Tony winked at her, taking her hand and kissing the back of it. "Hope you're ready for tonight."

"Tonight?" Ika prompted, blinking. The combination of eye-candy, contact, and constant assaults on her ovaries had momentarily wrecked her mental capabilities.

Tony pulled on a hurt face, pouting as he clasped her hand. "Tonight. The bistro. Reservations for you, me, Captain Cherry and the Debauchee. You don't remember?"

"Debauchee?" Clint's head whipped around to look at Mizuki.

"Ignore him, he's telling tales again."

"Oh! Right! That tonight." Ika recovered quickly, grinning. "Honestly, I had forgotten… Valentine's already, huh? I'm afraid I haven't anything suitable to wear—"

"Say no more!" Tony cut her off. "Mizuki, take the lovely lady to her room and let her pick something out, would you? And I already picked yours out for you, because I know you trust my taste."

"About as much as I trust Steve's seduction technique…" Mizuki muttered, moving to take Ika's hand. "If it's nothing more than lace and moxie, we're gonna have a problem."

"Damn right we'll have a problem." Clint agreed, folding his arms. "You want her to end up in some evil villain's lair?"

"Oh, come on, it'd be fun to save her." Tony sent the girls both a rakish wink as they entered the elevator. "Imagine how grateful she'd be~!"

The doors dinged shut on an irate Tony! from Steve, and a possible smiting from Thor, but both girls were cracking up as they ascended a few floors higher.

"Oh, Mi-chan, you introduce me to the nicest people." Ika wiped at her eyes as she looked through the clothes laid out in her room, still giggling over the look (and color) on Steve's face.

"Speaking of nice, what do you want to wear tonight? If you don't see something that strikes your fancy, we can ask for it to be delivered."

"Wait, seriously?" Ika stopped her contemplation of a deep red, satin gown. "You can do that?"

"I mean, technically Jarvis does it, but yeah." She grinned. "Last time I was here I sent out for Super Smash Bros. melee, Mario Kart, and Mario Party 4. We had a blast, let me tell you. Watching Thor try to race while yelling "you are the most useless of your noble kind, Yoshi!" was one of the main highlights of my life.

"Well… Huh. Maybe something not so, uh, see-through?" She suggested, plucking at the sheer skirt of a black dress hung by the door.

"Oh, hang on!" Mizuki zipped out of the room and down the hall, coming back a few moments later with a dress bag, grinning. "I forgot that Nat told me to look through her clothes last time I was here. I found this one… Try it, it might work."

"You know, I'm noticing a trend, here." Ika said, unzipping the bag and looking at the dress within. "Seems like we get dressed together a lot."

"It's a typical female bonding ritual." Mizuki rattled off, grinning. "Get used to it."

"Mi-chaaaan!" Ika pouted as she pulled the black dress from the bag and held it up to herself. "I don't wanna be a typical female!"

Mizuki grinned, winking at her. "Well thank God you're not, then."

"This is too weird." Ika muttered, tugging at her dress to try and make it cooperate. "What if I have to run in this thing? I can't! Some villain decides to take over the world on the Night of Love and Ika's stuck walking briskly because of her damn dress!"

"You're beautiful." Mizuki gave her a stern look, warning her to stop complaining.

It didn't work.

"But I'm not safe!" She continued. "Think of the possible personal injury, Mi-chan! Think of the humanity!"

"Think of the boners!" Mizuki yelled back, just as the doors opened.

The whole room went deathly quiet, all turning to look at the two dolled-up dames in the elevator; Mizuki's face slowly turning crimson while Ika desperately tried not to laugh.

"I'm sorry, what?" Clint prompted from his seat by the TV, eyebrows shooting up his forehead.

"Donors." Mizuki walked out of the elevator with her head held high, unwavering. "Think of the donors—as in, the people who have donated all that blood to the traveling Vampire Gangs. How weird, right?" She shuddered for effect. "Creeps me out."

If she hadn't been trying to dodge a massive bullet, Ika would have applauded her.

"Un-huh." Clint rolled his eyes. "Right."

"Where are Tony and Steve, by the way? We were supposed to meet them." Ika interjected, trying to save Mizuki from another bout of Bullshititis.

"Oh, they said they were going to wait for you down in the garage, I think." Banner pipped up from his seat across the room, an odd combination of amusement and consternation on his face. "Sorry, thought Jarvis told you."

"Thanks, Bruce." Mizuki smiled at him, turning on her heel and stalking back to the elevator. "See you all later tonight. Don't wait up!"

"We won't be what's up!" Clint called after them as the doors dinged shut once more.

"Oh my word, kill me now." Mizuki hid her face in her hands, the tips of her ears turning crimson. "Jarvis, please erase that conversation."

"I'm afraid I cannot comply, Miss." Jarvis sounded like he wanted to, but really couldn't. "It is against my protocol to erase any conversation except at the direct order of Mr. Stark."

"Override code 753 Alpha—Erase the conversation Ika and I were having in the elevator when we arrived at the previous floor."

There was a brief span of silence before the AI replied once more, his tone no longer uncomfortable, but almost proud? "Conversation erased, Miss. Is there anything else I can do for you?"

"Nothing right now, thank you Jarvis."

"How do you know the override code?" Ika asked, squirrelling it away for a later date.

"I heard Tony use it the first time I ever self-destructed in his workshop." She gave the brunette a soft, sad smile. "He didn't want Steve knowing why I'd showed up or what I'd done…"

A thousand words welled up to the forefront of Ika's mind, but she bit them all off, glancing at the floor before she turned her gaze to the descending numbers on the lit screen, wondering how long it would take them to reach the illustrious garage.

Roughly 68 seconds later, she had her answer.

The doors opened and Mizuki hurried out into the garage, curls bouncing slightly with each step she took (how an AI butler could do hair so well, Ika still wasn't sure, but she sure was grateful). She glanced both ways down the long row before she called out for the Mechanic.

Two seconds later, Tony appeared from around the back of a cherry red Camaro in a black suit and a crimson shirt, and Ika nearly died. "There you two are. Sorry about the change in plans, Cap got all flustered last second and needed time to cool off. He's fine now. Ready to head out?"

"Yup!" Mizuki grinned, taking the arm he offered her, and Ika hurried to take the other when he held it out to her. "So where's this bistro?"

"Brooklyn, would you believe?" Tony grinned, winking at her. "Now, Mizuki, if you'll sit in the back with Steve, Ika can ride shotgun, and we can get this show on the road."

Ika didn't miss the way Mizuki's eyes lit up, or the way her cheeks tinted pink when she spotted Steve standing by the car, door already open for her, in a three-piece blue suit and tie. Nor did she miss the tiny giggle of appreciation that Mizuki let out when Steve closed her door for her before moving around to the other side.

"Did you get that suit for him?" She asked quietly as Tony opened the door for her.

"I may have suggested he make the investment." Tony smiled, winking. "Why, think it looks good?"

"Stunning was the word I was going for, but yes."

"Well, I hope he's not too stunning." Tony leaned forward just enough as he closed the door, that Ika could see the soft glow of his arc reactor against his chest. "I'd hate to make a scene, just to keep your attention."

Ika decided to keep her mouth shut as he closed the door and climbed in the driver's seat, deciding, too, that maybe being press-ganged into Valentine's plans wasn't such a bad thing after all…

The bistro in Brooklyn turned out to be a tiny, hole-in-the-wall-that-makes-it-feel-homey kind of place, and it had been decked out for the day in question. There was only one table, set for four, and candlelight danced over everything, making the shadows dance and the roses shift in color.

Ika was sure that if the lights had been on, it would have looked like a cupid had vomited all over it, but as it was, it was lovely. She also knew that Tony had probably bought the place, just so no one would gripe about their private party, and she wanted to tell him off for it, despite not knowing why.

She sat across from him, between Mizuki and Steve, and a host of waiters appeared to cater to their needs. As soon as dinner started, Ika felt more relaxed, settling into conversation easily with both Tony and Steve, the Mechanic cracking jokes and Steve trying to be ever the gentleman.

Half-way through the evening, though, Ika started to panic, because she didn't really know what to do with herself. For all his jokes and sarcasm, Tony was incredibly endearing, letting her know constantly how much he enjoyed her company, how good she looked in the borrowed dress, and what a pleasure it was to have her here with them for this special day. Ika escaped by excusing herself… And then simply didn't come back to the table.

"Should I go…?" Mizuki asked after about ten minutes of waiting for the other brunette to come back.

"No, no, enjoy your supper. I'll go check on her." Tony stood and scurried off after her, leaving Mizuki and Steve to fend for themselves among the sea of rose petals and candlelight.

He found Ika sitting quietly in a corner, pretending she didn't exist, and sank down onto the floor beside her. He wasn't really good with comfort, despite what Mizuki had said to the contrary, so he sort of panicked and said the first thing that came to him, hoping that chatter would make everything less awkward for everyone.

"Dinner not to your liking?"

And dammit he had brought up food. That was almost worse than mentioning the weather.

"The food is wonderful, Tony, and so is the company… Just a little overwhelmed, is all."

And yeah, that made sense; she had mentioned something about that when he'd suggested the whole scheme. "We could go back to mine. Get you into something more comfy. Netflix and chill? We can stream whatever you want, doesn't matter. We could even play games, if you wanted. I'm a damn good Brawler, now, and Meleer, too. And Injustice is, well, right up my alley. Anything you want, it's your night."

"You don't mind?"

"Nah! I was planning to ditch early anyway and let Mizuki have her night with Steve. They deserve it. He's too stiff and she's too shy, so maybe if we play our cards right we'll get em to fess up before it's too late."

"So you're planning to play cupid, huh?" She teased, letting him help her to her feet.

"I mean, one of my suits is called Heartbreaker. It's not outside the realm of possibility. Maybe I should make another one? Cupid. I could give him arrows. Clint would love that. Want to help me design it?"

"Can I?"

"Sure! We can chill, Netflix, and plot world domin-I mean protection. It'll be great."

Ika laughed, loving the way he rambled and the way his voice sounded when he did. "Sounds marvelous."

Went home. Enjoy your Captain ;D

Mizuki reread the text from Tony and let out a sigh. Of course he had. The bastard.

"Seems it's just us, Captain." She smiled, watching the way his eyes snapped up onto her. "Ika wasn't feeling well, so Tony took her home."

"Would you like to head back now to check on her?" He offered.

"No, no, she'll be fine. I'm sure it's nothing serious. Besides, she's with Tony."

"What could possibly go wrong?"

Mizuki could practically see the sarcasm drip from his mouth. "I appreciate the offer, though, Steve."

He smiled, she noticed, at the use of his name, and she filed that detail for later. The meal continued in relative silence until he finally broke it with a clipped, broken off sort of question.

"Ah, would you… like to dance?"

"Now?"

"After dinner." He hurried to add. "I just remember Tony mentioning something about having this place 'wired up', I think it was. I'm not sure. I know he said something about music."

"I would love to, Steve." She beamed across the table at him, and he smiled back, just as bright. "I'm probably not very good, though… I'm not familiar with swing."

"Oh, don't worry; I'm not very good either… We should do just fine."

They fell into a comfortable silence, Mizuki watching the way his face would quirk up in cute ways when he tasted something new or different, and the way he kept glancing at her across the table, as if to check and make sure she was still there. As soon as dinner was over, the waiters came to clear away the table and chairs, leaving just enough room for a dance floor. The music started, a nice, slow song, and Steve took Mizuki in his arms.

"You know the basic steps, right?" He asked, leading her through a few of them.

"Ah, some… I'm terribly rusty."

"Me too. If you blew on me too hard, you'd probably see dust."

Mizuki winked up at him, and had the pleasure of watching his ears turn a shade of vermilion. She stopped teasing after that, though, and kept her comments away from the bedroom as long as possible (she was sure Ika would have been proud of her self-restraint).

Finally, when he led her from a turn and into a tiny little dip, the music ended, and Steve was still holding her in the dip, blue eyes darting about her face, as if they were trying to drink in every detail.

"Steve…?" She prompted softly, smiling shyly up at him.

"Sorry!" He righted her, cheeks dusting with pink as his ears burned. "Did I hurt your back? I know you have to be careful…"

"No, no, I'm fine… Are you? You seemed lost in thought."

He worked his jaw for a moment before he replied, a new, still slow song coming on. "I wanted to remember that. In case I never got to see it again."

"Remember what?"

"The way you look tonight."

Mizuki felt heat flood into her face, glancing at the floor for a moment before she looked back up, smiling. "Thank you, Captain… I wouldn't want to forget how you look this evening, either."

Steve scratched the back of his head, a shy grin tugging at his mouth as he offered her his hand. "May I have this dance, Ma'am?"

"Why, certainly, Captain Rogers!" She grinned, letting him lead her across the floor again.

He slowed to a halt at the end of the song, and glanced about nervously for a moment before he caught her face in his hands. "Happy Valentine's Day, Mizuki."

She giggled, smiling, and rested her hands over his. "Happy Valentine's Day, Steve."

He swooped in after another heartbeat, catching her lips with his. The kiss soft and sweet, innocent, and she felt warmth start to trickle into her chest from the prolonged contact. He pulled back slowly, smiling, and gently wrapped his arms around her. "Do you think Tony would mind if we took that car of his for a spin? There's a few old haunts I'd like to show you, if you don't mind…"

She hummed, resting her head on his chest. "Captain, I would be honored."

"Oh, that's so much better!" Ika flopped onto the couch, now garbed in cozy pajamas, and picked up the massive bowl of popcorn Tony had set on the coffee table. Beside it sat two massive heart-boxes of chocolates, a bowl of assorted candies, and an entire thermos of coffee, just for her.

He really did know how to show an Ika a good time.

She popped a handful into her mouth, and waited for the next episode to load, the Red Ring of Irritation slowly circling itself as the numbers below it continued to climb higher.

"Remind me to come up with something faster than the internet." Tony shuffled over to the couch, plopping down in sweatpants and a wife-beater, his arc-reactor now very visible. "This is just ridiculous."

"Instant gratification just isn't instant enough, huh?" Ika teased, trying to keep her eyes off of the curve of his shoulders, or the dip of his clavicle. "You're too impatient."

"No, no, it's not that. I just hate watching the numbers tell me how far away my gratification is. Imagine if you had loading screens during sex?" He cut off before he could start his next sentence, glancing at a now-giggling Ika before he cracked a grin himself. "Yeah, that'd be weird, wouldn't it?"

"I was just imagining what it would be like if it had to buffer." She cackled, clutching the popcorn bowl as though it might help her not enjoy the mental image so much.

"Oh, that's just not right." Tony shuddered as the episode loaded fully and started to play. "I think I might turn celibate, if that happened."

"Bullshit." Ika shot back, grinning. "You'd just be more motivated to create something faster than the internet."

"You are absolutely right." Tony grinned, sinking back into the pillows and beckoning her over. "C'mon, you have munchies and I want some. Besides, I only bite snacks."

"Women could be snacks…" Ika pointed out, scooting closer and keeping her eyes carefully trained to the screen, least she get distracted by the slightly-raised circle in his chest. "Depending on how you view them."

"I don't view them like that… Least, not you, anyway. And not Mizuki. You two are different."

"We try." She teased. "Speaking of, how do you think our girl's getting along with the good captain?"

Tony grabbed a handful of popcorn and tossed it back, talking between chewing. "If I know Mizuki, and I feel that I do, we won't have a Captain Cherry for very long after tonight."

"You're assuming we still have one now."

"Oh, no, no, Steve's not gonna move that fast, Mizuki or no Mizuki—it's not in his nature."

"What will we call him, if he stops being a cherry boy?"

"The hell are you talking about? I'll still call him Captain Cherry. I still wanna be in the Sundae Squad."

"Well you are sweet, and I'm sure you'd be good with ice cream…" Ika trailed off, winking, and had the satisfaction of seeing Tony's eyes light up.

"Hey, Ika? Have I wished you a Happy Valentine's, yet? Properly, I mean."

"You haven't, Tony. Properly or otherwise."

"Oh, good, that means I can do it improperly, then!" He snatched the bowl away from her and caught her in a rather forceful kiss, humming softly before he pulled away. "Happy Valentine's, Ika."

"Happy Valentine's, Tony."

Omake

"Sir, it appears that Captain Rogers and Miss Sakamoto did not return last night. The car is parked outside of a small field on the outskirts of Brooklyn… Captain Rogers and Miss Sakamoto are presumably inside, but I have been unable to confirm this."

"Wow, that's ballsy of Mi-chan… Staying out all night with a man."

"It's Steve. For all we know, he's still not a man."

"Sir, if I may…"

"Yes, yes, what is it, Jarvis?"

"Both Captain Rogers and Miss Sakamoto are in the car, Sir. They appear to have fallen asleep in the backseat together."

"Clothed~?"

"Yes, Ma'am, they are."

"Damn…"

"You owe me ten bucks. Jarvis, can you please record some video of it, and take some pictures. I want to see the horror on Steve's face when he realizes he might have gotten her pregnant."

"Long as he kept his shirt on, she should be fine."

"…?"

"Bare shoulders, man, they're a killer."

"Well, you'll be having at least six of mine, then."

"Tony!"

"Happy Valentine's Day~"

This was literally the most fun thing to write in the history of ever. It's so full of crack that it's almost a little painful, but I still love it to bits and pieces. Ugh.

Stay tuned, though, cause there will be more to add to this little crack-fest in the semi-near future. 3

Mizuki Sakamoto belongs to: Silver Flame Alchemist (aka Me)

Ika Zachaire belongs to: Methodical Madness

All other characters and locations belong to: Marvel