Disclaimer: None of JK Rowling's characters belong to me, but I will be adding some of my own.
A/N: I will be continuing Pansy's Secret, but the next chapter is in the works. Here is something to hold you over
Contrary to what the magical community thought, whether we were pure blooded witches and wizards didn't matter to us in the slightest.
What mattered to the Parkinson family was the Pack we lead.
Our Pack was the most respected and feared in the entire western hemisphere, and I was next in line to be Pack Leader, or Alpha Female as the Pack calls it. In ten years, my father would step down and I would become Alpha and lead The Howling Winds Werewolf Pack.
Of course, Hogwarts was a challenge for me, seeing as I had no choice but to change when the full moon ripped my beast from my body. She is an unforgiving mistress, the moon is. When she calls, we must answer.
Outside of the full moon, I could control my change, unless some Beast Master vampire was fucking with me and trying to force my beast into the open. Even then, I am able to resist most of the time.
Or unless my emotions got so out of control that my beast burst free.
More of that later, though.
I live in two entirely different worlds. There is the magical community, which believes it knows my world, but knows nothing of it. They do not know of my species of werewolf; they do not know of the seven different kisses of vampires with which we coexist.
The werewolves that the witches and wizards know are vile beasts that cannot control themselves without the aid of a potion or other magic.
I am a natural-born werewolf.
This may be disturbing to some but I was actually born when my mother was in her wolf form, which meant that I came out as a wolf cub. It rarely happens, but happens it does. Of course, as soon as I fell to sleep for the first time, I shifted into my human body and I was not able to shift again until I turned five years of age.
This was a shock, seeing as it normally didn't happen until age ten. My mother says that I'd been throwing a temper tantrum over something or other, and suddenly there was a small wolf growling at her.
My father took it as a sign of a powerful future Pack Leader and my mother cried tears of confusion.
As much as I truly hated to leave the Pack and go to Hogwarts, I had to. The combination of magic and my beast mixed with my emotions made me dangerous without training. Ever see what happens when a werewolf/witch gets so angry that her magic and beast begin to work together?
You don't want to.
And so I found myself staring at the bright red train once again, but this time was different. This year, my sixth year, was going to be different.
I didn't know exactly how, save for that I was going to quit my charade of pining after that git, Malfoy. The rest I would work out soon enough, but I was finished with Draco Malfoy for good. Besides, he was too embarrassed over the imprisonment of his father to even realize I was there.
Fair enough, he may as well not even have existed as far as I was concerned.
I turned to my mother and father, standing tall and looking at them with a small smile.
"Do your best to control yourself, Pansy," my mother reminded me. "Make sure you aren't seen when She calls."
'She' meaning the moon.
"I will, mother," I nodded. "I am always careful; and even if I am seen, since Potter's Grimm incident, they'll just think it was an omen of his death." I added with a chuckle.
"Pansy," my father growled a warning to me.
"I'm sorry, father," I offered him my throat, lowering my head in apology. "I will not be seen, I promise you that."
"Hold your head up," he pulled my chin up and forced me to meet his eyes. "We are in public and that is very odd behavior for a witch. Just know that I and your mother love you and we will write to you weekly. Please return the favor."
"Of course, father," I smiled and hugged him tightly to me, bringing my mother in on the hug as well. Their scent comforted me and I wanted just one more whiff before I left again, to remember what home smelled like. "I love you both, and I will see you at Christmas."
Both my father and mother kissed my cheek and said their goodbyes before I turned and walked on to the train, dragging my luggage behind me.
I hated pretending that I was having a hard time pulling my trunk behind me, when I could easily have picked it up over my head and carried it like that. But that would have drawn too much attention.
Having arrived early to get a compartment to myself, I found one near the middle where the Gryffindors normally sat took up residence, and I knew none of my housemates would find me. I looked around and made sure no one was watching before I lifted my trunk up into the overhead rack.
Lying back and relaxing, I kicked off my shoes and socks and opened a book I had begun reading about lycanthropes.
It was as close to true comfort as I could get for a long time, now. Save for privet moments and baths and showers and sleeping. Truth be told, I and the rest of my kind preferred to be naked over being clothed.
I never understood why people were so embarrassed over something as natural as nudity.
My lifestyle would shock quite possibly everyone in Hogwarts. I nearly never slept alone; I always slept with a few or many of my Pack members who frequently stayed at our home.
And it was always naked.
Before you ask, no, I do not have sex with these people. We simply sleep, and that is that. We crave the touch of one anther, the comfort, and it is not sexual in any way shape or form. My mother has taken to calling this sleeping arrangement a "puppy pile", which I find cute.
Though, I do admit that I enjoyed puppy piles much more when it was mostly or all female. Being a lesbian, that is bound to be the case, is it not?
Luckily for me, the Pack and my parents were all very accepting and didn't ridicule me for my orientation. Though, some of the males were definitely disappointed, but too bad for them.
While I was no virgin, I had only had sex a few times and that had been in emergencies to control my beast.
Yes, sex helps for some reason. Some abused it, and then paid the consequences when I or my father found out that they abused it.
Whether I liked it or not, clothes were a necessity outside of my home and the lupanar, our clearing in the forest where we meet at the full moon. I had gotten used to it by now, but still didn't have to like it.
My thoughts were interrupted when the compartment door slid open and a group of new first years nearly barged in.
"Do you mind?" I growled, glaring at them and they jumped back.
"S-sorry!" one of the squirrely little eleven year olds gasped. "We didn't realize someone was in- in here."
"Why don't you try looking through the window next time," I raised an eyebrow. "It's that clear sheet of glass right there," I pointed at it.
Still stumbling over apologies, the young students left my compartment and closed the door behind them.
Sighing, I thought, not for the first time, how much I envied them. As a future Pack Leader, I did not have a true childhood. My childhood was over when I turned the age of eight and my training began. Of course, my mentality had already changed on its own, naturally.
Hell, when I was seven, a vampire had come to visit and I had used any excuse to be alone with her so I could find her weaknesses in case I might have to kill her in the future. Such is the life of a young Alpha.
I got to play, of course, but it wasn't the same as human children playing. When we played, it was not just for fun, but to establish dominance and challenge one another.
I never lost a challenge.
The compartment door slammed open again and I heard a familiar voice. "Honestly, Ronald, why don't you just grow up?" Then it slammed shut again and I looked around to find Granger standing there glaring at the opposite wall, not having even noticed that I was in the room.
"He's a boy, Granger," I sighed, turning a page in my book. "If you honestly expect him to even remotely grow up, you're not as smart as everyone thinks."
She whipped around, gasping slightly and jumping backward a little. "I didn't even see you, Parkinson," Granger's hand was hovering by the wand sticking out of her pocket.
I looked up at her with just my eyes. "Then maybe you are just blind and have been confusing the boy for the girl all these years," I snarked at her. "Really, I thought you were brighter than that." I looked back to my book and continued reading.
"Why aren't you yelling at me to get out of the compartment?" Granger asked, and I looked up to see her frowning down at me.
"Stay, go, I really don't care," I shrugged. "It's not me who has the problem with muggle-borns, Granger. It's the rest of my housemates. I don't care about your parentage."
Slowly, Granger slid down onto the bench across from me. "So, you don't mind if I stay in here so I don't have to put up with Ron?"
"Nope," I said, looking back to my book. "If you want something to read, I have some books in my trunk."
"What's that you're reading?" she asked, trying to look at the cover.
"Nothing," I closed the book and shoved it into my bag. "Just a book I thought might be interesting, but it's not."
"Oh," she nodded, but her eyes lingered on my bag for a moment or two, then she noticed my feet. "Where are your shoes and socks?" she raised an eyebrow at me.
"Not on my feet," I commented and lay back again as the train began to move. "Forgive me for wanting to be comfortable."
The train came out of the tunnel and the sun shone brightly on my skin, warming me and I had to fight the urge to stretch out on the floor and lay there on my back. I loved the feel of the sun on my body; nothing could compare to it.
"Look," I said before she spoke again, "I'm gonna take a nap, so try to keep it down a bit, ok?"
"Fine," Granger shrugged and looked out the window.
Sighing, I turned over on my side facing the back of the seat and curled up, wishing that I wasn't alone. I hated sleeping alone, and being clothed made it even worse for me. I was asleep soon enough as the sun danced along my skin.
I woke to the sound of a struggle and Granger threatening to curse someone's ass off. Jumping up, faster than I should have done while trying to keep a low profile, I saw Millicent had Granger cornered and had her wand out.
Fuck.
Millicent was from another Pack of wolves, but a very lesser Pack that I was planning on taking over anyway when I became Pack Leader.
I let out a low growl, so that only she could hear it and she turned around to face me before jumping back. "What are you doing here?" she demanded.
"I should be asking you that," I advanced on her menacingly. She was not a dominant wolf, and I was. To her, she felt like she was being choked by the power rolling off of me that only other werewolves and lycanthropes similar to us could feel.
"Just having a bit of fun," she tried to defend herself, but she was backing toward the door. "You could join in."
"I don't think so," I said, laughing at her. "I'm here because I don't want to be around you, among others."
What claim do you have to her? Millicent's wolf growled to my own in my head.
None, but you have no place here, now leave, my own wolf snapped.
To Hermione, we were staring one another down, but to us this was a fight for dominance that both of us knew I'd win. Millicent just didn't have what it took to be dominant to anyone but a human.
Millicent left and I turned back to my seat, flopping down and looking over at Granger.
"You all right?" I asked. "Did she hurt you?"
"No," she said. "But I don't understand; two years ago, you and her were ready to harass me every chance you got, and now you're defending me from her?"
More like defending my territory, my wolf growled through my head.
She isn't ours, I told it. "People change, I suppose," I shrugged to her. "Maybe I grew up."
She could be ours, my wolf insisted. She would be a good mate.
Shut up, I rolled my eyes inwardly at the beast. She's human and we would hurt her.
Not if we're careful.
Enough.
"Are you ok?" Granger asked and I looked at her again.
"What?"
"You looked like something was wrong," she said, relaxing back into her seat.
"Nothing is wrong," I said, laying back down and turning over again after locking the compartment door. "Wake me up when we're almost there, would you?"
"Sure."
But I didn't go back to sleep, though I did a good job of pretending I was. I was arguing back and forth with my wolf. She insisted that Granger should be ours, that we should mark her.
, I rolled my eyes again,
She's not Pack.
Neither is your aunt's husband.
She would never accept me, us.
Why?
Come onreally? I have two halves: my human half and you.
We are one.
But she wouldn't understand that.
Make her understand.
That's it; I'm blocking you out now. Bye.
With that, I stopped all communication with my beast. It wasn't as though there was a separate being inside of me, but it was my other half, my wilder half, thinking against my human half. My wolf was me, and I was me, we had the same voice, but at the same time, I could tell which was me and which was my beast.
No, no human would ever understand what I was or what that meant.
I heard Granger move after a long while and gently rouse me from my "sleep". "Parkinson," she said, "we're almost there. You should probably put your robes on and get ready."
I looked up at her groggily and shook my head slightly before sitting up, pretending to wake up. "Thanks," I sniffed, standing up. That sniff was not a good idea, not at all. Granger had a scent rolling off of her that made my mouth water and my beast fight against my block.
"Are you wearing perfume?" I asked, looking over at her.
"No, why?" she frowned at me.
"No reason," I said quickly, rummaging through my trunk and pulling out a set of robes.
The sun was gone and the crescent moon shone above as I pulled my shirt over my head and slipped my jeans down my hips.
Granger quickly turned her head, pulling the shade over the window, and I rolled my eyes. "Really, why is changing clothes such a big deal to everyone?"
"It's just that it's kind of a major step," she said, looking down at the ground. "Again, you used to act like you hated me and now you're stripping in front of me and changing your clothes."
She wants us, my wolf said excitedly.
No, I snorted, and even if she did, she would want me, not us. She wouldn't understand that we are one in the same. And I blocked her out again.
Slipping into my uniform, I rolled my eyes and laughed at her shyness. "It's not a big deal," I pulled on my robes and straightened my Slytherin tie. "And I don't hate you; don't really think I ever did. As I said," I looked at her again, "maybe I've grown up."
She was already in her robes, and her wand was held tightly in her hand.
Straightening my hair and stretching again, I didn't so much as stumble when the train stopped and walked out of the compartment, nodding to her as I went.
I had a week until the full moon; being a prefect, getting out of the castle was no problem at all. I always volunteered to do outside shifts after curfew to make sure no students were outside. Of course, I never came in until the morning, when I was no longer furry.
I was one of only three of my kind at Hogwarts; the others being Millicent and Luna Lovegood.
Luna was part of my pack. We always ran together under the moon in the forest until we'd fall asleep side by side until dawn came and we would make our way back into the castle after dressing ourselves in clothes we'd brought out with us.
She was by no means dominant, but she also didn't let the other wolves in the pack push her around. The only ones she was required to take shit from were my father, my mother, and I.
Luna caught my eye and nodded toward an empty carriage and I walked over and stepped into the carriage before her.
We were joined by Longbottom, who looked like he'd wet his pants if I even so much as looked at him, and a few other students before the carriage started to move. Luna stared out of the window with her signature dreamy expression as I kept my eyes glued to my book again.
"Are you all right, Pansy?" Luna's voice slid through my mind and I sighed.
"I'm fine, Luna, thanks."
"You smell like Hermione Granger," her voice frowned.
"She sat in the compartment with me on the train," I turned the page in my book. "Good thing, too, Millicent was on the prowl again. She doesn't deserve to be one of us."
"You can't do anything about her here at school, Pansy," Luna reminded me. "Do not challenge her."
"I know. I won't, don't worry."
I blocked her from my mind, one of my special abilities as an Alpha wolf.
When I took my seat in the Great Hall, I distanced myself from the people I normally sat with, not feeling like listening to them cursing about Potter and his friends.
It was going to be a long year, but in the end, it would be worth it.