A/N: Yeah, just got an idea for a new drabble. Totally pointless. I put it in script-form so it would be easier to write. All stage directions will be in italics and parentheses. I was reading Fruit's Basket and got the idea from that. I think I might divide it up into acts. Some characters may play multiple parts. Yeah┘ you'll just have to read it.
Silly Little Fairytales
Act I: Silly Little Introductions
Fai: Long, long ago, in a far away land, there lived a beautiful maiden. She resided---
Mokona: Is it Mokona's turn???
Fai: No, no, just wait a moment. You'll get your cue. Ahem, anyway, like I was saying, she resided on the lush countryside that sat in the shadow of the large palace of the king and his family, with her stepmother, and three stepsisters.
(Fai looks to the left and the right)
Fai: And her three stepsisters...
(There is utter silence across the stage. Fai begins to whisper)
Fai: Where the hell are the three stepsisters?!
Syaoran: (From backstage) T-th-there's only one┘
Fai: But that's not in---fine, okay, we can make some revisions. So anyway, the beautiful maiden lived with her evil stepmother and evil stepsister.
(Sakura enters alone stage left. When she realizes this, she turns around and begins pulling at something backstage.)
Sakura: Kurogane, come on! That's our cue!
Kurogane: No! I am not going out in public like this!
(The two continue to struggle until Fai finally butts in.)
Fai: Kuro-pi, just relax... it's only a fan fiction.
(The struggle ends in Sakura's favor. Kurogane stumbles from behind the curtain. He is dressed in an elegant dress with a blonde wig atop his head. As soon as he sees the crowd, he turns beet red. Following after Kurogane is the white Mokona, donning an elaborate ruby necklace.)
Mokona: Yay! It's Mokona's turn now!
Kurogane: What the hell?! This piece of white pork bun is supposed to be my mother?!
(At this moment, Mokona swats Kurogane with a fan multiple times)
Mokona: Kurogane's a baaaad girl! How dare Kuro-chan talk to her mother like that!
Fai: You all, please. Settle down; we don't want anymore lawsuits, m'kay? (Fai clears his throat) Now, where was I...? Oh yes; so there was this beautiful maiden living with her stepmother and sister. Her father died a few months before (and oh, how it devastated her), and she became the sole heir to his fortune (oh, how that delighted her). But her stepmother won't havin' that. (Fai snaps his fingers in a "Z" pattern in the air, with a little attitude) Once her old man died, she took all the money, bought a huge house in the valley, and stuck the poor little maiden in the cellar.
Mokona: Mokona says get the steppin'!
(Mokona points to a door, stage right, marked "Seller")
Fai: Okay, who put Kurogane in charge of the props? Everyone knows he's illiterate... (Before Kurogane can pounce on him, he continues) Anyway, the poor, poor maiden was confined to the cellar at all times, unless she was cleaning their 6400 sq. ft. estate---
Mokona: Mokona says clean up my commode!
Fai: Or running errands for her stepsister---
Mokona: (Whispers to Sakura) Get me some of those magazines... y'know, so I can, uh, "play the part", understand?
Fai: ...Or underwater basket weaving (it really takes the stress away after a long day of scrubbing pots with only a toothbrush...). Her only friend was an old doll made of straw and a crudely sewn together dress, that she carried with her and talked to every day.
Kurogane: (Whispers to Mokona) Seems to me this broad's a little loco...
Fai: Every night, the beautiful maiden would look through the cracked, dirty window of the cellar and pray...
Sakura: (Gets on her knees atop a crate marked "Peechaz", made exclusively by Kurogane) Oh father, do you see what she had done to me, your only beloved daughter? She has made me a slave! Please father, please save me from this wicked place! I do not wish to be a slave forevermore! (Dramatically falls over onto the crate, but, being the clumsy girl she is, ends up tumbling head first onto the floor)
Syaoran: (From backstage, in a hyperventilating, utterly despair-laden voice) Sakura!
Sakura: (Still lying facedown on the floor, gives a thumbs up)
Fai: (He continues, though he can barely keep in his chuckle) This meticulous schedule continued day in and day out... Until one day, her father finally listened. (Fai grins cheesily, using a cheesy announcer voice) What will happen to the beautiful maiden? Will she find her Prince Charming? Or will she remain a schizophrenic slave for the rest of her life? I guess you will have to see... in the next act..! (Silence.) ...In the next act! (Fai hisses backstage) Cue music, dammit!
Mokona: Bum-bum-buuuum...!
Fai: (In a rapid voice) Act-II-coming-to-a-fan-fiction-website-near-you!
A/N: Okay, really cheesy, I know. But I've been in a rut and this was the first creative thought that has come to me in awhile. Please review... the first one back is always rough. And thank you for taking the time to read it: