Three fics at once! XD

Ash walked out of the court house, his face expressionless. "I am finally divorced." There was a touch of joy in his voice, joy that he was not married to a girl he didn't love. Of course, May was shocked at this. When Ash told her that if he didn't get a divorce he would go insane, she cried for an hour. Ash had foolishly married May at the age of eighteen, which was way too young. He only did it because he would never see the girl he loved again. It had been about ten years since he'd last seen her, but he still loved her .

Then he snapped out of his thoughts. He got back to the real world now. He dug in his pocket for his keys. As he pulled them out, he stared at the blue keychain May had given him from her trip to Cianwood City in Johto. It was in a heart shape and said 'LOVE YOU'. Ash kept on staring at it for a few seconds, until he tore it off and chucked it at the bush.

"I don't love you! Fuck!" He said angrily. He slammed the keys into the keyhole on the car and opened the door so hard it almost fell off of it's hinges. He climbed into the driver's seat and slammed the door shut. Ash slowly picked up Pikachu's Pokéball and released him.

"I'm guessing you hated it in there, Pikachu." He said, trying to hide the anger in his voice. Pikachu nodded really hard and started hopping around, happy to not be confined. Then he stopped in his tracks and pawed Ash's wedding ring. He gave Ash a glare, and Ash knew what he was saying.

"Oh, that goes with the keychain!" Ash growled as he threw it at the same bush. But there was an old man standing in front of the bush, and it hit him. The man picked it up and grimanced.

"No, I won't marry you! We haven't had a first date yet!" The man yelled at Ash. Ash's cheeks turned red and he decided to just drive off.

Back at his newly bought apartment, Ash aimlessly rolled around on the floor, looking for something to do. Pikachu was eating the pancake mix, and Floatzel had come out of his ball to watch The Desperate Housewives.

"Oh, my Arceus! Debbie's husband is cheating on her! No, Tina! Don't tell Debbie!" Floatzel screamed at the TV while Pikachu rolled his eyes.

"Ash! We're out of pancake mix!" Pikachu said in Pokélanguage.

"There should be some more in the pantry." Ash said.

"But I don't eat store brand! I want Aunt Jemima's!"

"Too bad, 'cause I'm not going to the store again today."

"Dammit."

Soon Ash thought of something, so he logged on to the computer. He went to Facebook and logged in. He made his facebook static from married to single, which he did happily. He then heard Pikachu blabbering in the kitchen.

"You know, sometimes I wish I couldn't understand you," He said.

"Oh, just please get me Aunt Jemima's!"

"Fine. Just make sure Floatzel doesn't have a heart attack while I'm gone."