Summary: Life is precious, something to be treasured, or so says the young Knight Atticus Kurosawa. The lives of his friends were cut short at a very young age, and since that day, vengeance has been his only goal. Together with his Bongun friend, Dimitri, he has grown strong, but will this strength be enough to avenge the deaths of his comrades, or will he, too, be robbed of his life before he truly has a chance to live it? And when an old and dear friend returns to him, and his feelings for that friend resurface stronger than ever from the deepest recesses of his mind, what decision is the right one for Atticus to make? A broken heart or a broken promise; such is the choice that young Atticus must make.
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The One I'm Waiting For
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Chapter One:
Reflections
Fear of the past brings fear of the future.
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I remember the days of my childhood so clearly, as if it was only just yesterday that I had been a young child of seven who had just begun training to become a Swordsman. I was on top of the world on my eleventh birthday when I left behind my Novice days and began anew as a Swordsman. I wouldn't have to live in fear of the Stalkers that had killed my father when I was just a baby, protecting his wife and his newborn child. No longer did I have to daydream of the adventures I would have with my friends when we graduated and left Izlude to make our own way in the world and find our fortune. After all, fortune favoured the brave, and we were as brave as they came.
One day, I had it all. And the next, I had nothing.
The blood on my hands, that of my comrades that I had tried so hard to save, proved to me that I had been as wrong as anyone could possibly be, that fateful day in the Payon Caves. My "fight or flight" reflex had kicked in when those same Izludian Stalkers attacked us, and like a fool, I chose to fight. My party refused to leave me and run, and one by one, I watched my closest friends die. Despite my best attempts to rescue them, every last one was killed. I knew that I couldn't possibly kill the Stalkers to avenge my fallen kin, so far too late, I decided to run. The Stalkers ignored me and looted my companions' corpses as I fled, tears streaming down my face and the knowledge that I would never see my friends again serving only to intensify the flow of those tears. All at once, my dreams had been shattered, my closest friends ripped away from me, robbed of their lives at such a young age. Andromeda, who had become an Acolyte; Julian, who had chosen the job class of Mage; Alannah, who had decided to become an Archer; Alaster, the one that had chosen to become a Thief; Gwenhyvar, who had made the decision to be a Merchant. All of them had stayed behind to fight with me, and all of them had died.
I'll never see them again, and it's all my fault. I wish I had died instead, I thought as I rushed through the gates of the Payon Village. Then, my entire world went black and I thought nothing more.
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The first thing I saw when I opened my eyes was the bright light of the sun shining in through a window. Someone must have taken me into their house after finding me passed out in the dirt road. I no longer felt any pain, and I wasn't bleeding anymore. From this, I deduced that whomever had brought me inside had used a red potion to heal my wounds. My eyes slowly opened as I gingerly pushed myself up off the bed, searching the room for my Stardust Blade. After locating it at the foot of the bed, I reattached it to the swordbelt at my hip and left the room, picking up my traveler's bag as I passed through the doorway. There was no-one home, so there was no-one to thank for saving my life, although I wasn't sure I would thank them for it anyway. It was more likely that I would be upset with them for not allowing me to die. As I left the house, I felt new determination, and I knew my purpose now.
I would live and become stronger so that I would one day avenge the deaths of my father and my friends. Only when I had killed those Stalkers would I allow myself to lay down and die. Until then, my main focus was to survive and push myself to become the best that I could be. I could die peacefully only when they were dead.
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I took the quick and easy way to the city of Prontera, by way of teleportation via a Kafra agent. There, I replaced my torn Swordsman's clothes with steel armour and had my blood-matted blonde hair cut short. Long hair would only get in the way, and what manner of Swordsman would wear his hair that long, anyway, I reasoned. With shining new armour and renewed courage, I would train until I could take no more each and every day until I was strong enough to confront those Stalkers for a final battle, where this time, I would emerge victorious. Do or die, I would fight them, and I would win.
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"Master Atticus! Master Atticus, wake up!"
I groaned softly. Being shaken awake by my Bongun friend was getting tiresome, it was the sixth time that night that he had been startled by something and needed reassurance. "Master Atticus, wake up, please!"
An exasperated sigh escaped me as I sat up and rubbed at my tired blue eyes. I wasn't going to be allowed to go back to sleep until I had calmed him down, I knew that all too well. "What is it now, Dimitri?" I tried to keep the edge from my voice, but he flinched and shied away a little all the same. "Uh...w-well, Master Atticus, you seemed to be having a nightmare. You were tossing in your sleep, and you kept apologizing to someone. Are you alright, Master?"
"Thank you for your concern, Dimitri, but I'm just fine," I lied. It wasn't uncommon for me to dream of that day in the Payon Caves all those years ago, back before I became a Knight. I had learned not to tell Dimitri of these nightmares, it only served to frighten him more, and a terrified Bongun was not fun or easy to deal with. He raised the paper amulet that was attached to his hat out of his terrified brown eyes and critically scanned me for any signs of being told an untruth, although it was not as though he believed he could accuse me of lying to him. He always said that he would never disrespect me that way, even though I had never given him any reason to fear me. I supposed it was just because he was a Bongun, I had noticed that all of them seemed to be afraid of absolutely everyone and everything.
I patted him comfortingly on the shoulder and gave him a reassuring smile. "Nothing to worry about, Dimitri my friend, I'm alright." He seemed consoled by my gesture and nodded shyly before sitting back against the tree he had been resting under. He never seemed to sleep, which didn't make much sense to me, but I didn't ask him about it. I was likely not the only one who was haunted by dreams of his past. "Try to let me sleep at least until sunrise this time, please, Dimitri. I'm very tired, and we have much training to do." He nodded meekly and softly said, "Yes, Master Atticus," then fell silent. I highly doubted that he would actually keep quiet, but I didn't say it. Dimitri was incredibly sensitive, the slightest hint of sharpness in my tone was enough to make him tremble with fear and refuse to look at me for the rest of the day.
I lay back down and closed my eyes, letting out a soundless sigh. It was going to be a very long night.
