Disclaimer: This is merely a fanfiction for Yu Yu Hakusho
A/N: AU because I can.
Rewritten Jan12,2011 because frankly, the old version sucked so much that even I cringed when I read over it. Heck, I had toforce myself the read some of it because I couldn't stand reading it.
'Its been four years since Shiori … mom adopted me. Sometimes I can't tell if it was a good thing or not. Don't get me wrong, I love her like a mom, but a nagging feeling buried deep in my heart insists me that she's not worth it. That's not true; she's done everything she could for me… it's not her; it me that the problem. I don't feel like I fit in. I'm missing something…'
Green eyes fluttered as the boy glanced at the many plants placed around his room. He stroked the leaves, silently greeting each of them as he fed them their morning drinks of tap water. The boy exuded the aura of elegance and confidence as he did every day. In his mind though, thoughts haunted him, dragging his spirit down.
'If only life was as simple as these plants. Drinking and sunbathing every day… Is that why I love them? I've always had an affinity with nature. Perhaps my life should be with them instead of with humans. I was found with them after all…'
Beep, Beep, Beep!
The boy, Shuuichi, gave a jolt in surprise. The alarm clock continued beeping, ignoring the glowering looks he gave it.
He sighed, running a hand through long red hair, battling it for control. "No… I'm glad it distracted me. …think happy thoughts," he reminded himself. Shiori wouldn't like it if he came downstairs looking troubled.
The woman was a dear. She couldn't have a child of her own, so she turned to adoption. Her kind and generous attitude was everything any child could fall in love with. And out of everyone in the orphanage, she chose Shuuichi.
Shuuichi was a wreck when he entered the orphanage … or so he was told. At the young age of six, he was found wandering the forest nearby. His skinned had been marred with marks and scratches. Clothes hung on him, damp with water and blood. It was the trees that saved him, he was told. They provided Shuuichi protection against the harsh wind storm that hit the town. Their leaves and branches gave the small boy shelter from the rain.
He could remember nothing before that day. He drew a blank every time he tried. Why was he in the forest? Who was his parents? What happened to him? Where did he come from? Nothing made sense to him. It took years to calm the young boy down, and to repress his (instinctual?) habit to attack anyone who came close to him. It took years for the boy to tell himself that there was no reason to feel like he should hate them, to kill them, to look down on them.
The world suddenly seemed so confusing to the little redheaded boy. The social workers suspected abuse, but they could do nothing for the nameless boy. So the redhead simply had to learn to 're-live', as they called it.
The boy re-started his new life as an empty slate at the age of six, with nothing more but a simple red pendent he could not force himself to put down. How did he get it? He didn't know. It was clutched in his hand when they found him. He didn't know why, but it was more than just a clue to his missing memories … it was special.
"Breakfast!" a voice yelled from the bottom of the stairs.
The redhead smiled from his room. "In a second, mother!"
Five years after that, the young woman called Shiori came. The poor woman looked nervous when she first went in the building. The kids flocked her, eager to impress. Shuuichi hung back, opting to spend time near the back gardens, tending to the plant life, thanking them for saving his life.
He didn't know what the Shiori saw in him, but apparently he, out of all the children, caught her eye. And the rest was history.
Shuuichi pulled open his desk drawer and withdrew a blood red pendent. He palmed it, holding it close to his heart. "Now I'm ready.
"I'm going now, mother!" Shuuichi yelled as he left the house.
"Bye! Be careful and have fun!" his mother shouted back. The older women stared happily at her son's retreating back. 'Oh how the years just seem to pass by so fast...'
Brriiingg~!
The sound of the school bell echoed down the street.
The redhead's ears perked as he heard it from a distance. "Oh, shoot. I'm going to be late," Shuuichi murmured to himself. He sprinted the rest of the way, passing classmates, their distinct magenta uniforms glowed brightly under the morning sun. The other kids around him surprisingly didn't seem rushed.
"You'd better hurry; the bell just rang," Shuuichi commented as he passed by, trying to be helpful.
They just stared at him. "What are you talking about? You can't hear the bell from here; it's too far away. You're hearing things, man. It's probably not even rung yet."
Shuuichi stared back at them, confusion on his face. 'That's not true; I can always hear it from here…' But he dismissed the thought a moment later as the final bell ran, and the boy continued his run to the school.
School, like always was a bore. Shuuichi couldn't understand why everyone seemed to struggle so hard on the work. It made so much sense to the boy.
All you needed to do was follow the instructions, or the formulas. That was all there was to it. As for history, facts easily came to his mind like second nature. It was like he lived through them before. He could relate with it.
As the school day ended, Shuuichi quickly left. School was meant to be an educational institute, but to him it felt more like a prison. Why was he forced inside a building when he could be out on the luscious green grass outside? Why did he have to sit for eight hours, when he could be running around? Why did he have to spend so much time with students who seemed too immature for their age?
The redhead shook his head in annoyance, as he left the park trail, deciding to talk a shortcut home. He really wanted some quiet time alone.
Trees and plants always gave Shuuichi a sense of welcoming and comfort. But today, something dark seemed to overshadow it. The boy involuntarily gave a shiver. "It's creepy in here," he thought as he noticed the sudden eerie silence. It was too quiet to be normal. The birds seemed to have all stopped chirping; the rustling of leaves even seemed to be missing. Unconsciously, the boy stood up straighter in alert.
"…ko...Kura… think…n awa…insuf…"
Shuuichi stiffened. "Who's there!" He yelled.
The unnatural whispering continued, getting louder every second, "Youko…rama…not …trong…should die…"
The boy could feel himself starting to hyperventilate. "W-who… Leave me alone! You don't scare me."
"Kurama…Weak like a human… where is he…should suffer"
The boy couldn't feel his legs. 'Back. Back up!' He urged himself, but his legs stayed planted in place.
"I smell him…"
It sounded so close. Too close. It felt like something dark was going to cover him up. "NO!" His muscles suddenly seemed to work, propelling him backwards. The boy scrambled out of the park, eyes dilated, breathing coming short. He huddled by a lamppost, shivering in fear. He put his head between his legs, trying to calm.
As he caught his breath, logic came back to him. "I was just overreacting," the boy mumbled to himself. Really, ominous voices in the park? There was only one reason for that. "Probably a prank." 'Or a psychopath murderer,' added a voice in the back of his head. Shuuichi took a deep breath brushing the idea aside. "Yes, it has to be a joke…" He thought back on the unnerving voice in the park. It sounded so deep, like a growl of a beast. And the words he said… "I think it's time to visit the library." He intended to find out what they meant.
In the library, Shuuichi thought about the words as he waited to use the computers. "Youko Kurama?" he tested out what sounded like a name. "Who's that?" Whoever it was, death was for them if that monster in the park ever caught him.
"What do they mean?" Shuuichi thought as he typed it in. He pressed the first link that came up.
Looking at the screen, Shuuichi gave a gasp. On the title of the page, it read, "The Legend of the demon, Youko Kurama." Below, was the legend. The redhead read eagerly, learning that Youko Kurama was a very powerful, thousand-year-old demon with the ability to control plants. He was a thief with a partner called Kurone, the pendent weilder. One day, he was caught alone, partner deceased, by a group of demon hunters. One attack, Rose Whip Tornado, later, no one was left, and Kurama had disappeared. To this day, demons continued looking for him to defeat the famed fox for fame, glory, or revenge.
Shuuichi frowned. Demons? That had to be a lie. He shook his head, "I knew it; it was a prank." A well informed prankster, but a prankster nevertheless. After all, who would believe demons really did exist?
But a tiny clench of hopeless , fear-fueled belief was still in his heart.
After that incident, Shuuichi made it home quickly. The long way.
As he stepped foot in the house, he could hear the television blaring in the living room. His mother, on the other hand, was at work. The boy laughed out loud, "Mother, how forgetful you are."
He turned to the television, news playing in the small black box.
"Breaking News!" The announcer declared, "Another murder in Deberu City!" Shuuichi cursed at the box. Deberu again? He lived in Deberu. "It's the third one this week. I hope the police catch the offender soon. For the last month, there's been at least two murders per week. What kind of psychopath are we dealing with here? And Deburu City used to be such a safe city to live in.
"We're telling all you watchers out there to stay in as much as possible. Police suspect it's a group of individuals doing such crimes. The bodies of the victims are always found in multiple pieces, cut with a sharp instrument of sorts. You need great power to do this. And now…"
Shuuichi turned the box off.
"That's more than I want to know." He said to himself. After what happened in the park, the redhead didn't need himself to be more paranoid. "Just forget it, Shuuichi," he told himself, "It won't happen to me. Out of everyone in the city, I'm only one person. I'm not that unlucky."
Or maybe those were famous last words.
"Good morning," Shuuichi yawned to his mother the next day.
"Good morning Shuuichi," his mother answered, fixing breakfast. "I'll be done in a minute."
"Okay mom," Shuuichi replied, sitting down at the table. A constriction around his chest seemed to loosen as he stared at his mother in the kitchen. Things seemed so normal that you wouldn't have realized there were a chain of murders in the city lately.
Shiori hummed as she cooked. Her son smiled at her. Yes, everything was normal, and it would be for the rest of their lives. Why was he so worried?
"Love you, mom," he murmured quietly.
The woman heard and blushed at the words.. "My, what brought this on, dear? You really want to eat that much?" she teased. She served him his food.
At school, Shuuichi's classes went by without him knowing. He was distracted the whole day.
Something kept tugging at his heart. Unfounded dread kept haunting his emotions. Fear of the unknown haunted his mind. He couldn't concentrate on his lectures.
It was a relief as the school bell rang for the end of the day. His anxiety was illogical, but Shuuichi couldn't help but want to check on his mother just in case. Today was her day off, leaving her alone at home for eight hours. Besides, he would be going home anyways. It was just a matter of how fast it took him to return home.
Sprinting out of the school, Shuuichi rushed towards his house. The boy arrived at his street. It was quiet and peaceful as it had always been. The boy shook his head, laughing at his own paranoia. Nothing was wrong.
He unlocked the door to his house. "Mother, I'm home." He called out. Silence greeted him. 'Did she go out shopping? Mother, you should've waited for me; you should know better than to go out alone with a murder group loose.'
The boy wandered past the living room and suddenly froze. The back window of his house was smashed. Some one was in his house.
Suddenly his unfounded apprehension didn't seem so stupid anymore.
"Please let there be no one here, please let there be no one here," Shuuichi chanted to himself, gathering the courage to check his house for the intruder.
Unfortunately for him, there was some one in the house. Shuuichi could hear them breathing loudly.
"Mother?" Shuuichi asked trembling, "Is that you?" A muffled scream could be heard from the kitchen. "Mom!" yelled Shuuichi. He rushed towards the sound, fear suddenly vanishing at his mother's cry.
When Shuuichi arrived in the kitchen, he saw his mother on the floor, tied and gagged. "Mom…?" He asked hesitantly. The bound woman wriggled and screamed into her gag. The boy rushed forward towards her, causing the mother to cry some more. Belatedly, Shuuichi realized it was a trap.
"Found you…" A voice growl into his ear.
Shuuichi jumped, whipping his head around. The smell of stale blood filled his senses suddenly, and the boy idly wondered how he could be so distracted as to not notice it sooner. "W-what do you want?" The redhead managed to stammer out.
"You don't know? How… pitiful you look right now. No longer…"
"Step away from my mother," the boy threatened through his fear and confusion. 'Don't know what?'
"Or what?" The thing seemed to tease.
"Or… or-" The thing waved his arm. An invisible force seemed to push Shuuichi away, and he flew into the kitchen wall, breaking through it.
His head spun. It hurt. Everything hurt. What was going on? Everything was so confusing? So loud. Why won't the ringing stop? Why won't the screaming stop? Why won't-
Shuuichi's head snapped up. Screaming? His blurred eyes struggled to focus. The scream was… His mind snapped focus. Mother!
She hung, legs dangling above the ground, held up by a clawed hand wrapped around her throat.
Something snapped inside Shuuichi's mind as he saw her hanging there, looking as though she was dead. "Mother!"
The thing opened his mouth; fanged teeth coated with dribbling saliva started towards the woman he loved. A forked tongue ran over her face. "You taste pretty good, woman. No wonder the insufferable demon keeps you around."
Shuuichi rushed forward in anger. And suddenly, the world slowed down. His heart felt like bursting, but the world around him suddenly looked so clear and focused. The boy turned to the creature – no, demon before him. His eye flared in anger for what it almost did to his mother. As if a response to his hate, vines around him sprung to life, trapping and strangling the beast. The plant life was listening to him.
'No, that not enough.' The boy thought to himself. The demon had to pay more dearly than that for hurting his mother.
"Please, Yo…ko…" The demon begged for mercy, but the boy paid no heed to his words. No one messed with him. He gave the creature a hated glare, and the roots of the tree outside seemed to understand what he wanted. In a blink, the massive root rushed out of the ground, puncturing a hole in the demon.
Blood was hacked out of the demon's lungs, and Shuuichi looked down on it, satisfied as his work.
"S-shuuichi?" A timid voice startled him out of his fogged daze.
"What?" Shuuichi asked, confused. His actions came rushing back at him. 'What did I do?' The boy stared briefly at his hands. 'How could I do that and feel so proud about it?' He glanced up at his mother for guidance.
Shiori didn't answer the stricken boy, but she pointed behind him, towards the mirror above the fireplace. Shuuichi turned around slowly, dreading to see what shocked her so much. The mirror was cracked from all the action, but his face showed on it just as clear as always.
The boy shook his head slowly; the figure in the mirror copied his motion. 'No,' the boy thought at it despairingly, 'This can't be me…' Looking back at him was not the redhaired, green-eyed boy he say every morning in the washroom. This person had silver hair and gleaming, golden eyes. This person was the legendary demon, Youko Kurama.
Suddenly it all made sense to the boy. The redhead – no, the silver-haired man – stumbled wearily up the stairs to his room, slamming the door shut and he sank down into his knees. He was a demon. He was Youko Kurama. No wonder he wanted to attack people so much as a child. No wonder he hated humans as a child. No wonder he felt like he didn't fit in. No wonder his hearing was so good. No wonder he was so great with plants. No wonder he felt like he lived history. No wonder he felt like everyone was so immature. No wonder the attacks were so close to his home. No wonder could retaliate against the demon so calmly, without a hint of remorse.
The man's hand snaked into his pocket, pulling out his prized red pendent. 'Kurone's pendent.' He reminded himself, thinking back on the legend. 'from Kurone the pendent wielder. A partner. A friend.' No wonder the pendent meant so much to him.
"I am Kurama. Youko Kurama," Shuuichi thought out loud, testing the words. "I'm a demon. I'm a thief. I'm a murderer. I was the one it was after. I'm the one who caused those innocent people to die." His clawed hands grabbed his head, holding it in pain, "It's my fault!" he cried out in distress.
He couldn't believe it. No one would've died if it weren't for him. His mother wouldn't have gotten hurt! It was entirely his fault!
Kurama – no, he would always be his mother's Shuuichi. Shuuichi walked over to his desk, pulling out a piece of paper. His trembling hand rushed over the page, writing out five short but meaningful words for the one woman who did everything she could for him. He glanced at the shut wooden slab of a door that was dividing his room with the rest of the house.
'I don't belong here' the demon thought to himself, clutching the letter in his hand. 'I will not ruin life for mother any longer.'
The plants in his room sense his words; his feelings. They acted as he wished. Anything for the woman he called mother; anything for the innocent, angelic woman who meant the whole world to him.
'I love you, mom' was his last thought before sharp blades of greenery pierced through his skin and out, from the dear plants he once adored so much, in every corner of his room. It was a jungle of green in the room, plants taken over. In the heart, protected by the foliage, laid a single boy, their late master. It was his own, personal grave.
When Shiori went upstairs to check on her son after calming down from the attack, she never expected to find him as he was.
She'd expected her sweet boy, perhaps as shocked as she was at the attack, freeting about his change in appearance.
She'd expected her daring son, in distress, but nothing so bad that a mother's unconditional love and kind acceptance couldn't help.
She'd expected for her lovely Shuuichi to cry his heart out with her, promising each other to stay safe and look forward to the future.
She'd expected her only darling family to know that she'd love him no matter what, and they'd live through their life together until old age caught up to them.
She'd expected that one day, she would be able to attend her son's graduation, wedding, and witness his first born.
She'd never expected to open his room door only to find him dead on his bed, killed in a self-inflicted manner.
Shiori clambered over plants, determined to reach her son. She cradled him in her arms, tears spilling out. "No, no, no, no. Please no." Her words fell to empty ears.
She brushed her hand over his face lovingly. It had changed, but he was still her son. That quirky little kid who loved plants. That sweet child who always brought her spirits up no matter how down she was. That boy who she fell in love with at first glance - who she told herself right away at the orphanage that she would make sure a smile would exist, and stay on his pretty face.
But she'd failed.
Now she couldn't tell him how much he meant to her. How he was the person who kept her going each day. She wouldn't be able to thank him for saving her. She couldn't tell him she loved him.
Shiori loved him so dearly.
A piece of paper on his body caught the mother attention. She reached for it, smoothing it out to read. In her son's cursive script, it read: "Thank you for everything, mom"
And she broke down crying once more.