It had been six years. Six years since he had seen his best friend. He couldn't even really call her that anymore. He'd lost contact with her a long time ago, his fault. Now every time someone so much as mentioned her name the nineteen year old would feel a pain in his chest causing him to lash out at anyone close to him. Brock had long since given up trying to convince the boy to call or write to her, each attempt futile as he was too consumed by fear. Fear that she had forgotten him. The young boy had written so many letters and so many lists of excuses, so many apologies and explanations- all of them lay in his bag, unread by the person they were intended for. Ash gripped the straps of his bag firmly as he wandered behind his three friends: Brock, May and Dawn. Forcefully he drew his mind from the beauty he once had the privilege to call his best friend to the beaten down they were currently following.
"We're here." Brock's rough sounded as he turned back to look at the raven haired boy worriedly. "You sure you want to go through with this?" Each member of the travelling group turned to the youngest male. However he couldn't formulate any words so instead offered a subtle nod and swam past his friends. He was ready.
Not much had changed when he reached the Gym. It seemed much healthier and alive in contrast to the shell it had been before the redhead had taken charge. Looking closer though not much had really changed. This small observation brought a genuine smile to the face of Ash for the first time in a long while, the little action portraying hope. Swiftly they entered the building, meeting at the reception whereby there sat a blue haired damsel. Instantly Brock was proclaiming his undying for the receptionist. As soon as it had happened, it was over- May dragged the boy by the ear over to the corner. Te grin on the boys face grew once again remembering exactly how his best friend had done the same notion to the lovesick man. The bluenette smirked Brock provocatively and give him a wink only further increasing the insanity of the spiky haired brunette.
When her eyes finally swooped over the group her smile dropped at the sight of the raven haired male, Ash's own smile became a facade no longer as confident as before.
"Is Misty here?" With disgust on her face she sternly shook her head from side to side. In disappointment the boy bowed his head, utterly grief stricken. He had took day to finally get here- traveled so far to finally apologize, to pluck up his courage, suck up his pride and rekindle their friendship. In a matter of seconds all of that had vanished. With a stiff body he mechanically walked to the door only to stop after a single step.
"Was someone here for me Vi?" The melodic song was sweet yet assertive, curious yet powerful and he knew exactly who it belonged to. Swiveling on his heel he face the redhead, the stunning owner of the beautiful voice.
"Hey Mist." A lopsided grin worked it's way to his face.
Her eye widened as she stared, in disbelief, at the boy before her.
"Ash?" In response he nodded and her facial expression changed to one of puzzlement. Quickly her eyes ran over every inch of the boy, who nervously played with the rim of his cap in his hands, never taking his eyes from the cerulean orbs in front of him. Then he noticed. Contently sat on her head was a very important hat. A poke league baseball cap to be precise. A cap that one young boy sent around a million postcards into a competition just to win. The grin he wore grew in size as his eyes traveled back to the young woman's.
"What do you want?" It was nothing short of what he expected from the fiery tempered female. Still smiling he replied;
"I came to apologize."
"To me?" To clarify the girl even pointed to herself to avoid any confusion. In the boy's mind there was nobody else that he needed to apologize to. No one important that needed to hear the two words slip from his lips. The boy, his eyes never leaving hers, nodded his head. "Why?"
Ash knew he had a lot to apologize for: never returning her calls or letters, breaking his promise to always keep in touch and even ignoring her for the purpose of his training to achieve his life long dream. But for some reason the boy could not put these reasons into spoken words. The look in the girl's eyes told him that she was not asking for these excuses but rather she was asking why to another question. A question in which Ash dreaded his lame reply that he knew could never be enough.
"I was busy. I-I just wanted to be the Pokemon master. I'm sorry..." A sad smile appeared opposite the boy.
"You were busy?" Stupidly the boy mistook the woman's odd tone for one of glee, eagerly hoping that the gym leader would understand. "Too busy?" Now the naive boy was confused. "Too busy to call your best friend?" It was the minute she spoke the words he understood, a sharp pain traveling through his chest.
"No Misty it wasn't it wasn't like that... It, it was-" suddenly the aspiring Pokemon master could not formulate the words needed to defend his own case. In an unusually calm voice the female asked,
"So what was it then Ash?"
No one spoke. In the background an audience of friends stood watching as the boy was slaughtered with words that they knew would scar him.
"You're ungrateful Ash." And with that the girl was walking away. Fast on his feet the male began to shout in her direction hoping to ignite an old flame that they could use as a basis to mend their broken friendship.
"Then I want my hat back!" The world stood still. Everything stood still. Including Misty. The only sounds were of the echoing of Ash's sharp breaths. Slowly the gym leader twirled around. Looking into the eyed of the boy she dreamed she could forget. The eyes of the boy she longed to stop haunting her dreams. The eyes of the boy she wished had never hurt her so much.
As soon as he saw the look of pain on her face he wished he'd just have let her leave and move on without him. He wanted to bundle her up in his arms and tell her that nobody would ever hurt her again- that he would never hurt her again. Within that fraction of a second of seeing her expression he understood, everything. He realized to what extent he had really hurt her. The pain she had felt all these years, alone, coursed through his body, denying him the redemption he so desperately craved.
Without haste the woman dislodged the cap from her orange locks and glared at the headgear.
"Just another thing you don't care about/" She spoke so quietly that she did not expect anyone to hear her. He did. Every single syllable. His heart broke as she sounded out each word. A tear strolled down his cheek as he watched the girl memorize every dirt patch, every stitch, every memory of The Hat. He had no idea the meaning it held to her. Suddenly he wanted her to have it. Yet before given the to speak, her led footsteps sounded as she stepped closely towards the traveler. Carefully she crowned his hat with the hat. By now the nineteen year old's faces were so close that their breath tickled one another's neck. It didn't need to be said that neither laughed at the warm, caressing feeling.
"Here just another thing for you to throw away. But just remember some things don't like being replaced." Ash caught the woman's sight strip from him and sweep over his shoulder. In his mind there was no doubt she was looking at his travelling companions, namely the two females. And with that she walked away.
Quicker than ever Ash's heart began to thump in his small chest. Unwanted tears burst through his eyes and his loud sobs filled the emptiness of the room, matching the slapping of the girls shoes against the cold floor as she left. His hands shook and his mind was put on hiatus- only accepting one subject. Misty. The boy was no stranger to the feeling, he felt it every time he was the flush of red hair, or hear the mellow shouting of her voice. This pain was love.
At that moment he couldn't let her go. He had only just come to accept his feelings. As thoughtless as usual he allowed his mouth to open and speak the four words that would change his life forever.
"Misty I love you!" Again the world stopped spinning. Time stopped clicking. The whole world was still. All that mattered were the woman and the boy stood in the room.
Carelessly the woman sighed, he back unclenched in pain whilst water droplets fell freely to the floor. She shook her head at the floor and muttered a few words that only the yellow ball of fur - hiding behind his master's leg- could hear.
Without a tense muscle the redheaded woman left through the sliding glass doors. Leaving the boy's life; forever. The derelict walls of the boys shattered heart were left to cave in on themselves. On his knees, violently shaking and crying into his hands May and Dawn ran over to offer him comfort.
Meanwhile Brock crouched down next to look in the black beady eyes of the yellow Pokemon.
"What she say?"
"Pikapi pika pi chu pi chu" [Ash, it's too late,]
Brock looked over to the crying boy and then over to the glass doors. Daisy stood there. Controlling his urge to rush over there he nodded. She understood, returning the favor before returning to her sister's side. It was over. Brock got to his feet and shuffled over to the boy and hastily pulled him to his feet.
"Let's go." Before given the chance to drag the boy out Ash wandered over to the sliding doors under the wary watch of his fellow travelers. Swiftly he unsaddled his bag from his back and placed it on the doorstep, letters inside. The heavy hat was then positioned on top. He began to walk away.
Halfway out of the reception area the boy turned back. The hat was placed back on his head and the letters taken from the bag. The much lighter bag sat back on his back and he placed the stack of letters back on the doorstep before leaving for good. "You're right, some things can't be replaced." The man left, his friends in tow. "You're wrong though. I never tried to replace you." He looked over his shoulder and promised never to return out of fear of hurting his beloved. "You could never be replaced..." The sun set in the distance. He had a long way to go.