The smell of the manila envelopes hit my nose as I shoved another file into place in the H column. I sighed deeply. Today was my seventeenth birthday and two more birthdays without the people that meant the most to me. She thought she was doing the right thing by taking me away from them, didn't want me to insole my father's way of life, she wanted me to uphold hers.

My mom never made it personal with a case, not with a family member's law enforcement problems. She was headstrong, best damn detective from her department. She attracted many of the cases she fought which made living more harder to do. Being the daughter of a file clerk at the Boston police department was hard enough, but being the daughter of the lead detective in that department was hell on earth.

The looks, snickers kids would give me throughout school. So much I had let my grades slip up, let anxiety take me over. I didn't like going out much ever, after the two friends I though I had burned me badly I wasn't trusting to anyone. But I learned that in a matter of a second anyone could be you're new best friend! We even had a few threats and often patrol cars or an officer to escort me whenever I went out. It wasn't hard or foggy this memory isn't to remember. That day was clear. The night was even clearer!

I was trying to snap my backpack up and some stray books fell out. When he walked by with his cheap Harley Davidson boot and kicked the books further from me. I moved quickly to pick them up, trying so hard not to soil my mom's reputation, by popping this kid in the mouth. "Fuck off Ben." I spat.

"Make me Wallis!" He laughed sarcastically, with an edge of pure cruelty.

I ignored him picking up the books and reaching out for the last one, when his hand came over top of my hand. 'Ouch!" I whaled out in pain.

"Better learn to watch you're fucking hand bitch!" He growled.

I heard the roar of an engine and looked to see a red-head smirking he got out of his car.

Oh great I thought sarcastically the dickheads brother wants a piece of this lovely light hearted action. "Well, well, what do we have here Ben? Little Ivana Wallis. So tell me what the fuck did you do now?"

"Nothing." I mumbled quietly, searching desperately for my last book, my poetry and writing journal.

"Really now? Because Ben here seems to have a problem and when my brother has a problem so do I? Are you causing this problem you little half breed slut?"

My head snapped up and angry tears threatened to fill my eyes. "At least I don't fuck my brother's little girlfriends to feel something on my scrawny ass dick do I Radcliffe?" I snorted, at the sir like names both ass holes carried and projected. He didn't like that one bit and his hand raised up to slap me, but my arm caught it first twisting it. "You better leave me the fuck alone! Or next time this will be you're balls! Am I making myself fucking clear, to the both of you?"

Benjamin nodded his head backing away and Radcliffe let out a huff. "This isn't fucking over Wallis! Just because you're mom is on the fucking 5-0 line doesn't give you're ass a free pass, you fucking hear me?"

I decided against flipping him the bird as he stampeded back to his car and drove off. Louis end up being late that afternoon so I had decided to walk home, get some air for a while. Mom was always to busy except to be a tiraider to me and my brother Angell. We had different Dad's, Angell was born to a man named Douglas Emmett, disowned mom and Angell. I was born to mom's husband and my lame ass father Theodore a.k.a. Todd Wallice. Or known as Teady on occasion, only when he picked up those bad thug life habits he had.

Reason why I am called a half breed slut is because I am white. But what the hell is color? We are all people, so what if my dad is a dead beat white druggy. I'm proud of my mix. They called me half breed really to hurt me, race had nothing to do with it, they were just in an uproar because my mom put their parents in jail, or busted their father's for hitting their mom's or hell busting them around.

Nothing really mattered to me. I had nothing to deal with my pain, I was passed cutting to just pure black depressive writing. Drugs didn't phase me any, sure I smoked pot with Angell once. But he turned 18 and left me with mom and dad. I wanted something more, I was never looked at like girls my age no matter what I dressed in, tried my hair, tried nice clothes, looking. Nothing, but a tween sometimes saying I was pretty.

It often hurt seeing everyone the way I couldn't be. I wanted my dreams to come true I wanted to be pretty or as pretty as my mom. I was 5'3' dirty blonde hair, big boobs, nice butt I suppose from my many mirror trips I gathered. Freckles, blue eyes, some tan to me. I was all my dad's daughter, mom I got her leg structure and her stability and toughness. Emotions from my dad. I started walking that night, getting a sandwich and pop at the local café and doing some writing, listening to the music act. I didn't notice it was dark and what neighborhood I had to walk through that night. Mom hated living so close to on call places. Hated living so close to Stokley Home a place she called pure trouble.

I pulled my jacket around me and the cool lonely air hit me as I walked fast throughout the alley and my hair whipped. Every little sound made me jump and went from walking quickly to breaking out in a run. Until I tripped and fell into a trashcan skinning my knee up, I quickly moved behind the trashcan as I heard the little sound turn into footsteps. I pulled my knees up to my chest and I rocked back and forth trying to hold my breath.

When the person did finally stop in front of me my eyes widened and them my suspicions were confirmed. Ben's brother Radcliffe was a druggie most likely…..

I mean come on hoodie up, hands in pocket, looking around. Rain started falling followed by a crack of thunder. I saw a mustang pull up and the bright lights and loud engine made me cover my ears and eyes, bringing them to my knees. Finally the lights were off and the engine was turned off, the loud thud of boots were heard.

I looked up peaking from the corner of my black jacket to see the most fascinating, yet freighting man I have ever seen. I looked at the car's detail this man stepped out of, a glossy black base of paint on the car, followed my deep red tribal markings. The same black tattoos I could see peaked up from the corner of his knight rider like brown leather jacket. I gasped quietly, covering my mouth, my head going at a rate of pure wonder, my imagination wild, an aching I was trying to ignore already between my legs. There in it's or his finest was a real true live Boston gang lord.

Jesus god my mind went. I saw he carried a green knapsack slung over his shoulder. He strutted like no one I have ever seen, not even thugs in the station or car. Dirty blue jeans tight on his legs making his own big gun known. Black shirt with a red one underneath, and I frowned upon seeing the cross necklace. Humph what a liar I thought. He had good faith in something, doubt he went by it though. I did respect his gang nature. Of all the guns I studied that mom busted this was the most fascinating one and I was close to the fucking action.

I wanted action of my own. I watched him walk thinking about all those times mom tried to keep me away from this. I watched Radcliffe trade the bag of money fro bags of drugs and something in a paper bag I saw sticking out of Radcliffe's back pocket. I frowned huh? Is that? Was that a gun I saw? "Thanks Billy." I heard Radcliffe nod off.

"Just make sure this is fucking more secure next time you meet me you little fucking punk!"

I smirked at his attitude toward Radcliffe and the hold he had. God he looked so demanding. "Bald does work." I mumbled lowly. "And a goatee too." And Billy wow, William a Boston gang lord. He sounded way to familiar. Looks like some snooping later on in the file cabinets.

Radcliffe touched the bag, but did not pull it out I sighed relief when Billy got in his car, and Radcliffe walked back to his. When they both disappeared I shakily breathed out and pulled myself up out of the dirty hiding place I had. I started looking frantically both ways to see if the cost was clear and I took off walking as fast as I could to the ending of the alley in just another turn.

My body was tense and for some reason the urgency made me excited I felt somehow like a part of things in the other side of life. I witnessed something. Something most would fear. I shook my head smiling a little, until I heard footsteps to close behind me, way to close, my smile faltered and I was jerked back by my jacket before I could turn around. I was slammed into the side of the brick wall and I slid to the ground, where a foot came down on my hand. "Ow." I cried out in pain.

I looked up to see Radcliffe. "You thought I didn't see you're ass dart behind that trashcan? You've seen something tonight Ivana, something you shouldn't have." He stated, pulling out the brown paper bag. "You know already what is in this I assume? Almost shot Darley's ass with it!"

I nodded, gulping panic was seeping through me and I was having trouble breathing and I felt dizzy. "I don't like little bitches like you, half breed sluts, no one's of any town, usa getting in my fucking business! You fucking belong in a crate with worms and there's millions of people on the suspect list for you're death. Darley included."

I only nodded to afraid to speak. My eyes were already welled with tears and they were running down my cheeks. He was right when he was right. I didn't belong here. He pulled the black and silver handgun out and cocked it before I could move. He pointed it at me. I looked at him. With all I could muster I screamed at the top of my lungs. I hurled myself at him and got up running. He grabbed me faster and threw me to the ground.

"Feisty bitch eh? Maybe we should try something a little different. He yanked at my pants. "W-what are you doing?" I yelped out in disbelief. "Stop it! Get off me!" I ordered kicking at him, as he had my panties already sliding down. "No no help me someone please help me!" I screamed out. My heart was beating faster. Tears were pouring the ground was hurting my back. "No, stop it get off me!" This wasn't happening not to me, no please no not me, not the virgin geek. He unbuckled his pants, "Here trash I need to loiter!"

"No!" I screamed. "Mom, Louis! Help me!"

I heard the sudden firing of a shotgun. "Did you put my name in you're fucking punk mouth, Radcliffe?"

The tone was husky and as Radcliffe jumped and scampered off me I breathed out relief and let out shaky tears, frozen to the ground.

"Yeah I heard you." His husky tone spoke. "I ain't Billy Darley for shit nothing am I?" He tapped the barrel of his gun to his bald head. "Why don't you come fucking closer eh? Taking up new hobbies? Raping teenage bitches now! Not enough with them is it? Can't get you a woman to stick that measly dick in?"

I heard Radcliffe growl. I knew what was happening and I wept out, "He's got a gun."

I heard scuffling feet before shots rang out in the night and I didn't look to see what happened I only laid there tired and week. I heard the sound of boots coming closer and I whimpered. I looked up as his fingers brushed my hoodie out of the way the rain perching in to my bloody face. His eyes were the most gorgeous icy dark blue like a violent night ocean and the winter on it. The Atlantic like the Titanic. Up close he was amazing. I laid there pants down, panties down.

He raised his hands with caution and I just let him yank my panties up fast, he was putting out behavior that surprised me. Before we both heard a "freeze and put you're fucking hands up and step back ass hole!"

--

"But mom." I snapped. "It wasn't Darley."

"Enough Ivana, and what the hell were you out walking late for? Louis pulled up at school then checked the café, you weren't there!"

"So I got fucking tired of waiting on watch dog and needed air. Give me a fucking break!"

"I'll tell you what I'd like to give you. How could you be so irresponsible? Billy fucking Darley is to damn dangerous, you stay away from him you hear. My god what he did tonight he almost-"

"NO!" I cut her off. "He did not almost. "It was my fucking fault I was there and it was Radcliff who had my so called half breed's panties down to my knees!" I snapped slamming her office door.

I walked fast bumping into someone. I looked up to see him standing there, wet and rugged, eyes sparkling with rage. He was pissed at me for getting him in deep shit.

I started at him both our breathing was ragged. I heard her heels clicking before she grabbed my arm. "Your caught now Darley! No escaping this!" Ivana tell us what happened." She spoke in her manner of professionalism.

"Well I was walking home and-"

"No." She cut me off. "What happened when you hit the ground?"

"After Radcliffe had me down he pulled my clothes down and then Billy here fired a shot and saved me."

"Well what happened when you were behind the trash can?" Louis questioned.

I looked at Billy, his eyes raged. I decided here and now what road in life I wanted and it wasn't Detective Wallis's daughter anymore, it was what I wanted.

"I saw Billy pull up in his car and he handed Radcliffe a white piece of paper or something." I lied, looking over at Billy. His eyes went into shock and it had me smiling inside. No one expected that from me hmm mm, hell no!

My mom frowned. "A white piece of paper?"

"And where is this paper?" Louis questioned.

"Don't know?" I shrugged. "I was to busy getting attacked to notice where it fell."

Louis frowned. "Are you sure honey that's it?" Mom asked.

I glanced at Darley one last time before speaking. "Yeah, I'm sure." and walking off.

I heard them both sigh knowing they had nothing to hold him on and Radcliffe had the drugs, without my word and Radcliffe's attack, the drugs were solely his and they couldn't hold Billy to selling them either.

I set outside on the steps of the station when I heard loud claded footsteps approach I jumped up, still shaky from tonight.

He stood next to me, cigarette dangling from his lips. "So ya lied to you're mommy huh? What the fuck for girl? I don't like anyone getting involved in my business, especially a 5-0 bitch!"

"This so-called 5-0 bitch saved your ass tonight William Darley." I mocked.

"What the fuck is in it for you huh? People like you wouldn't survive a day in my world."

"Give me a world where I can tolerate living and not knifing, then we'll see." I said quietly, tears near my voice.

"Knifing?" He questioned.

I shrugged. I'm a fucking slut breed, simple as that, and I don't know why I enjoyed saving you're ass tonight, but I did!" I got up off the steps surprised with my efforts of being able to talk to a guy like that, a guy alone.

I heard him grunt before walking over to me. He gave me the once over and reached into his back pocket pulling out what seemed to be a match tab. He handed it to me. "We'll see girl, we'll see!" He smirked leaving me to look at a red tab said Four Roses.

--

The Four Roses turned out to be a bar and the weeks went by where I met the gang, and became a part of that life, part of them, Billy and Joe gave me undivided attention when not selling. They treated me like someone they could trust, and I trusted them with my life. I went on to know that they were the most notorious gang in Boston.

--

Years passed and I remember Joe almost dying because a man named Nick Hume took the law into his own hands, I had been ripped from their grasp when mom found out, they never fought for me, guess Billy wanted me to go back to a life where he knew I'd be my safest. I didn't want to I wanted to be with him and him only, he made me into a woman, I knew who I was. My mom had called Joe an animal, deeming him that title when she walked into my bedroom, surprising me and Joe both on my bed with his fingers inside me. That's when we couldn't hide it anymore. I remember screaming and begging Billy not to leave me, but he went into that cold hard gang lord era, and shell. Another year passed, nothing else. I was wanting hoping ,or something he's want to see me. I sighed shoving the draw shut.

If it was one thing I needed it was to see Billy, question is would he ever want me?

Alright so my hand at another DS fic plot I had in mind. Enjoy it, hopefully when I feel better I'll update, review if you like it please. :))))))))