Chapter 1 - Always Afraid

Thunder sounded outside her bedroom. Time seemed to stand still as she stood in the middle of her room, waiting for the lightning to hit and light her up again. With the power in her house turned off, all she could do was wait.

A knock sounded on her door and she quickly turned to face it, eyes wide with fear.

"Aleigha, sweetie, are you ok?" Her mom's head peaked through the door, and she sighed in relief.

"Mommy, I'm scared." She whispered. The room lit up from the lightning again and she saw his shadow in the corner. She screamed and fell to the floor in tears. Her mom ran to her and cradled her in her arms, whispering soothing words in her ear.

"Shh. It's ok baby, he's gone. He's not going to hurt you anymore. Shh, it's alright."

Her tears slowed and she fell into a restless sleep in her mother's arms.

"Aleigha, come on! You can't be serious!"

"I can, and I am. He totally tried to trash my car!" Aleigha smacked the hood of her beat up, old Chevy truck for emphasis as her best friend Janice rolled her eyes.

"Aleigha, he's like, the nicest guy in school, and he has a huge crush on you. Why would he try and trash your car?" Janice asked as she fingered the red and black beads hanging around her neck.

"I DON'T KNOW! But I saw him with black spray paint, getting ready to spray it on Delphie. And there was more in his backpack." Aleigha got in the truck on the driver's side, and Janice followed suit opposite her.

"Ok, really girl, stop calling your truck Delphie," Aleigha rolled her eyes, "And today was the first day of school. SPIRIT DAY!? Red and black? You did nothing. He was probably just trying to help you out.

"Then why did he run for the hills when I caught him?" She started the car and pulled out of the parking lot on the way back to Janice's house.

Janice shrugged, "I don't know. But that's my theory and I'm sticking to it." She smiled.

Aleigha laughed and rolled her eyes again, "Freak." She turned on the stereo to her favorite station and started bobbing her head to T-Pain's Got Money.

"Oh! Ok, so I finally talked to Gordon! He said hi to my in sixth period today, I couldn't believe we had a class together, and we started talking about out summers! Isn't that awesome!?" Janice's eyes were lit up and she had a bright smile on her face.

"That's great, Jan. So are you going to homecoming together?" Aleigha asked.

Janice sighed, "I don't know. We just started talking. For all I know, he could think I'm and idiot."

"Aw, come one. He doesn't think that."

"I hope not. He's sooo cute!" Aleigha smiled. Sure, she was happy for her best friend, but she was still jealous. She couldn't have what Janice could. After being abused and raped by her drunken father for the first ten years of her life, she was too afraid to get into any kind of relationship with any man. Unlike Janice who'd had a crush on Gordon for a year and one boy friend before him.

"Al. Al! Are you even listening to me?" She was parked in front of Janice's house, and said girl was waving her hand in front of Aleigha's face.

"Huh? Sorry, what did you say?" Aleigha asked, snapping out of her daze.

"I said, can you pick me up for school tomorrow?"

"Oh, uh, yea." Janice got out and waved goodbye.

"Sweet! Later!" Aleigha waved and drove home in a daze.

It'd been six years since her parents got divorced. She hasn't had to be afraid ever since. But she is. Always. And she sees his face everywhere. During thunderstorms is when it gets the worst. He always did his abusing during the storms, and even though he's gone, she can't help but wonder if he's going to come back and get her.

She parked in her driveway and saw her mom in the front yard, gardening. "Hey mom. Is Ronan home yet?"

Her mom shook her head, "No, he should be home soon though." Ronan was her seven year old brother. He was only a year old when their parents divorced, so he doesn't remember their father. But she was glad for that. She didn't want him to ruin Ronan's life like he ruined hers. She would've killed him if he had.

Aleigha nodded and went inside. She dropped her backpack on the couch and went to the kitchen for a snack. As she was opening a stackers lunch able, Ronan came in.

"Anything good for snack today?" Ronan asked.

She shook her head, "Nope, same ol', same ol'."

"Anthony says hi." Ronan sat at the table across from her with his lunch able. Aleigha just cocked an eyebrow. "He likes you and it drives me nuts."

Aleigha laughed, "Oh, that's hilarious!"

"Shut up." She kept laughing so he threw a cracker at her.

"Ok, ok, I'm sorry. It's just really funny."

"Is not."

"Oh, come on! He's got a crush! It's cute!" Ronan glared at her, "Fine, fine. I'll shut up."

"Thank you." Aleigha chuckled and got up and ruffled his hair.

"No problem, shrimp." Then she dumped her garbage and went to grab her backpack before running upstairs to her room.