I stared at my computer as the Twilight Lexicon loaded.
Did I really want to see this? What if the person they chose to play me was ugly? What if everyone from then on assumed I was ugly?
Or worse… What if the girl was gorgeous? I would have to sit through two hours of this beautiful girl doing all the things I would normally do. And what if Edward-
I shook my head to clear my thoughts. That wasn't going to happen. Edward wasn't going to leave me for some actress chick. Even if she was thinner, prettier, and didn't have devastatingly low self-esteem. Breathe, Bella. Breathe.
"Bella?" Edward asked from his place on my bed. "Is there something wrong?" He was at my side now, my hair between his fingers.
"No, I'm okay. I'm just… kind of nervous," I admitted, blushing a bit.
"What is there to be afraid of? It's just a girl who's going to pretend to be you for a couple of hours. If you want, we don't even have to go watch the movie," he offered. I looked up at him and smiled.
He pressed his cold lips to mine for just a moment, not even leaving me time to overreact. I frowned and crossed my arms, knowing fully well that I was acting like a five-year-old. He gave me my favorite crooked smile, and said "It's done loading."
I squeezed my eyes closed and turned to the computer screen. "How bad is it?" Even though it was totally silent, I could almost see the appraising look on Edward's face. Another train of thought entered my mind; Edward with one eyebrow raised, a smile on his face as he decided maybe I wasn't the one for him. But I banished that thought. It wasn't going to happen, no sense freaking out about it.
"Well, other than the fact that she is totally incompetent for the role she is playing, I suppose she could do," Edward finally said.
"Incompetent how?" I wasn't going to open my eyes until I knew for sure how bad it was.
"She isn't nearly beautiful enough to even pretend to be you for three minutes, let alone two hours." I could hear the disapproval in his voice.
But he was biased. He didn't see me very clearly, he thought I was the most beautiful girl on earth. Maybe he has vision problems. I mean, Rosalie is his sister.
"Bella." His tone of voice was firm, yet soothing. "I can hear Alice's thoughts from here, you know. Not opening your eyes isn't going to work."
I sighed, and opened them.
The girl in front of me was somehow managing to look vaguely like me, and at the same time, completely different. She had the right shaped face, although it was slightly more angular than mine. She had brown eyes, but they were a slightly lighter shade, and somehow seemed totally different from my own. I tried to figure out exactly what it could be, the subtle difference.
And then, something else hit me.
She was so much prettier than me.
Suddenly, my chair was facing the opposite wall, and Edward's face was inches from mine.
"Isabella… What am I going to do with you?" he asked me. His breath blew into my face, and it made me dizzy. "You are a thousand times more beautiful than any actress will ever be."
"I thought… you couldn't read my mind?" The space (or lack thereof) between us was scrambling my thought process.
"I can't. I can, however, read your beautiful face very well."
"That's laying it on a bit thick."
"No, it's not. It's true, and it will still be true tomorrow, and the next day, and the next, for, well, ever."
He pulled me into his arms just as I decided I could definitely live through this movie if Edward would hold me like this the whole time.
"Forever," I whispered back to him.