Secret Santy~

By: ZedXTReaTz

"Alright, quiet down! Has everyone gotten a name?" the teacher clapped her hands together, giving them a signal to return to their seats.

"YES!" all but one child replied. A petite pinkette to be exact. She raised her tiny hand to draw her sensei's attention.

"What's wrong little Sakura?" sensei chirped while the entire classroom enthused about the names they received. The teeny girl stared up at her sensei innocently and revealed two (folded) pieces of paper.

"Sensei…why'd I get two?" her emerald jade orbs shone with curiosity.

Her teacher gasped in response, "Oh dear! It seems that there was a mistake," she reached out her hand, "Here, give one back to me, Sakura."

But little Sakura didn't listen; instead, she unfolded both pieces and began to sparkle.

"SENSEI! I WANNA DO BOTH!" she hopped up with excitement; all eyes landed on her.

The teacher jerked back, "B-But Sakura, someone else has to get one of the piec-

Tears formed in her enormous cloudy eyes, ready for her dam to break and with a snap of a finger, the teacher gave in and school had already ended.

Skipping home, Sakura couldn't help but hum with delight. She had gotten to be the 'Secret Santy' of her two favourite people in the whole world! 'What luck~' she inwardly cheered.

"Too bad the both of them were absent today…I KNOW! I"LL VISIT THEM AND ASK WHAT ARE THEIR FAVOURITE THINGS!" and she continued skipping down the snow covered pavements. Not long after, she had arrived at her destination, endlessly pressing the doorbell outside the gigantic, cream and burgundy, mansion.

The main entrance was immediately kicked open after the 300th ring, exposing a rather pissed girlish looking blonde (a ponytail tied up) with a santa claus hat to top it off.

"THE HELL DO YOU WANT YEAH-…" a brief moment of silence was hinted as the blonde gaped in shock at the small pink haired girl. She in return froze.

"Sa…Sakura-chan…uh, so it was you, yeah! Come he-"and as he took one step forward, the elementary schoolgirl let out a wail of tears. The blonde panicked, trying to calm down the sobbing child.

"What did you do this time, Deidara?" a bass voice was caught and the blonde swiftly spun around after the sound of his name. A raven haired teen, with a low ponytail, stood in the entrance with slight amusement, though it never showed.

"GAH- ITACHI! HELP ME OUT HERE!" Deidara begged said boy.

Sakura instantly halted her bawling then rubbed her eyes to take a better look at the teen and noticed it really was Itachi. More tears whelmed up inside her as she dashed towards Itachi's arms, as if he were her birth giver. He picked her up and she flung her tiny arms around his neck.

"I-Ita-chan!" the girl hiccupped, "D-D-Dei-chan yelled at m-meeee!"

Itachi gave the Uchiha's famous glare causing Deidara to stiffen.

"I-It was an accident, yeah!" he protested.

Itachi ignored his excuses and gently patted Sakura on her small cranium "There, there Sakura. You shouldn't cry or you'll ruin your pretty face."

His hand wiped the tears away from her eyes while she stuck her tongue out for Deidara.

"I HATE YOU DEI-CHAN!" and with those few (hurtful) words, Itachi carried Sakura back inside as a gloom covered over Deidara's head.

Sakura ran ahead of Itachi to where the living room was and was greeted by a set of surprised faces (and an orange lollipop mask).

"Sakura-chan! Tobi is very happy to see you!" one with a swirly orange lollipop mask, covering his entire face (plus a santa hat on his head), was the first to rush towards the girl to pick her up, "But Tobi is curious to why Sakura-chan is here!"

Sakura raised his mask a little and gave him a peck on the cheek (the entire room twitched with annoyance at this), "Hi Tobi-chan! I actually came to visit Naru-Naru and Sasu-kun today!"

Tobi put the fragile pinkette down as someone else took this chance to pick her up again.

"Aren't I getting a greeting kiss as well, little doll?" teased a red head with chocolate eyes (also wearing a santa hat).

Sakura reddened for some reason but still managed to kiss him on the cheek.

"Ah ah ah~ On. The. Lips." He toyed with her, however Sakura was seriously about to do as he said until two other pair of large (blue?) hands grabbed her petite frame away.

"Sasori, you're such a pedo!" Sakura right away smelled a fish scent and gazed up excitingly knowing that it had to be her shark friend (he looked like a fish santa with that hat on his head).

"Sharky-chan!" Sakura cheered as the whole room snickered.

"I told you that's not my name pinky! It's Ki-sa-meeee!" the fish looking teen emphasized.

Sakura giggled in response and kissed his cheek.

Next was Hidan to pick Sakura up but he actually just held the hood of her sweater. Tobi and Kisame lectured him about holding the girl properly once though he didn't seem to care.

"Hey brat, I want minds here!" he ordered, pointing up at his forehead.

"Don't be picky, Grandpa!" Sakura teased, kissing the boy on his cheek whether he liked it or not. He in return spouted some curses and put the pink head down.

"Okay," Itachi interrupted, "Since we're done with all the kissing of cheeks; what purpose did you come to visit Naruto and Sasuke for, Sakura?" Itachi stooped down to the girl's eye level.

Sakura then looked from left to right, inspecting the room to see if any intruders were listening in. The group of teens blinked at her in question until she finally signalled them to hurdle in. Everyone leaned forward, paying full attention to what their cute little angel was about to confess.

"I'm…I'm Naru-Naru's and Sasu-kun's 'Secret Santy'!" she whispered as if it was top secret.

Everyone tried their best to hold back from hugging the life out of her. The way how she whispered to them was just so adorable! It was killing them (yes, even Itachi).

"So, where is Naru-Naru and Sasu-kun?" Sakura wondered out loud.

"They got the cold, yeah," Deidara appeared out of nowhere; eyes looking a little on the red side…wait…WAS HE CRYING?!

"BOTH OF THEM?!" Sakura said in a shocked tone, completely ignoring Deidara's arrival (poor Deidara ended up sulking in the corner).

"Yup. Sasuke caught it first but Naruto didn't know and took a sip of his soda," Kisame replied, fixing the pink head's bangs.

"Plus, they're cousins and are always together so it's unsurprising the both of them fell ill," Sasori shrugged and went back to watching his favourite show (the muppets…it's manly).

"And they're little shit heads," Hidan added, receiving a blow from Itachi and went to sulk in the corner with Deidara.

"Tobi's a good boy!"

"Ahem" Itachi cleared his throat, "Well anyway, the both of them are in the game room. If they have time to play games and not rest (like I frikken asked them to the little mofos) then they have time to see you," Itachi gave a small smile (veeeeeerrrrry smallll).

Sakura nodded and received a map of the house (yes it was that big) from Itachi. She began skipping down the large hall way as the group of boys smiled and watched her leave.

0~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~0

"Naru-Naruuuuu? Sasu-kuuuuun? You guys here?" Sakura called as she finally arrived at the game room, of course by getting lost a few times.

She walked around the humongous room (which had gigantic flat screen TVs and billions of games, also bean chairs) until she spotted yellow and black spots in the far right. It seemed that the both of them were taking a nap from all their video gaming.

Sakura grinned and decided to sneak up behind them. She tiptoed, took in a deep breath of air annnndd "GRAPEEEEEJJJUUUUIIICCCEEEEEE E!"

The two boys flew up, slipped on controllers and fell to the floor. Sakura was dying with laughter.

"Sa-Saku-chan!" Naruto exclaimed, sitting up quickly and rubbing his button nose.

"Jeez Sak! Don't scare us like that!" Sasuke pouted, hiding the red mark on his forehead.

Sakura was stifling her laugh, "I-It's not m-my fault you g-g-guys hate grape juice so much!" and she began laughing again.

" Saku-chan, how come you're here?" Naruto yawned.

Her laugh died down "U-uh…cuz…I WANNA MAKE BABIES WITH YOU GUYS!" she screamed the first thing that came to her mind.

Both boys spitted out…well, spit! You could see their whole faces flushed as red as a tomato.

"Y-y-y-y-y-you-DO YOU EVEN KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS?!" Sasuke eyes looked as if they were swirling from all the heat off his face.

"Y-Yes I do!" Sakura blushed realizing what she had just said.

"N-Naruto! Tell her that she's insane!-…uhh…dobe…why're you stripping?"

Cricket Sounds.

"…I thought the three of us were gonna make babies together…so I was making sure I wasn't already pregerant…(lol naruto can't say pregnant properly)

More Cricket Sounds.

"D-DOBE! HOW COULD YOU THINK YOU' RE PREGNANT?!"

"WELL IF YOU WEREN'T STARING AT ME YESTERDAY I WOULDN'T THINK SO!

"WE WERE GOING A STARING CONTEST! HOW CAN YOU POSSIBLY GET PREGNANT BY STARING AT SOMEONE!"

"I DUNNO! MAYBE CUZ YOUR EYES ARE HOES, BELIEVE IT!"

"TAKE THAT BACK!"

" .HOEEEEEESSSS!"

"YOUR SHOES ARE HOES!"

"WHAT WAS THA-"

"STTTTTTTTTTOOOOOPPPPP!" there was a pause as the two boys stared at their pink head friend; eyes wide open.

Her eyes were filled with tears, "Every time I come here the both of you always start fighting…I'm sick of it!"

Tears streamed down her cheeks and a throb was felt in both Sasuke's and Naruto's chest. They never liked seeing her cry. And when she did, only Sasuke's big brother, Itachi, was able to calm her down. This made everyone envious of him.

"Sakura…" both said her name gently and as they reached towards her, she stood up.

"I'm going!" she yelled and dashed through the door. Running down the stairs, she bumped into the pierced leader of the group of boys, Pein (he was in the toilet the whole time -3-).

"Hm?" he looked down, "Ah. It's you. What's wrong little one? Why are you peeing through your eyes?"

Sakura pointed at his face, "Piercy-chan!"

His eye twitched.

0~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~0

"Oi! Little shits!" Hidan strolled into the game room with a plastic grocery bag, "Where's that pink brat? I bought some extra takoyaki crap and I don't want it to go to waste!"

As much as Naruto and Sasuke wanted to comment on the silver head's lie, they were just in too much of a daze to care.

"What's up with them, yeah?" Deidara came in after.

Hidan plopped down on a red bean chair, "I dunno, but they're creepin' da shit outta me!"

"Huh? Where's Sakura-chan, yeah?" the ponytail teen gazed around the room.

"…She…left…" Naruto began normal (seems like he snapped back to reality) but ended with a whisper. Sasuke was still out of it though (was that his spirit leaving his body? O_O)

Both Deidara and Hidan blinked.

"SHE (FUCKIN) WHAT (YEAH)!?"

Downstairs sat Itachi, Sasori Shar-*ahem* Kisame eating takoyaki and toasting up under the kotatsu until they were interrupted by loud thuds coming down the staircase.

"EVERYONE!" Deidara was the first to rush down the steps while Hidan followed.

"What is it now, brat?" Sasori addressed him, taking a sip of his hot cocoa. A vein popped up on Deidara's forehead as he knocked his red headed friend's mug out of his hands.

"THIS IS NO TIME TO BE SITTING ON YOUR LAZY BEHINDS DRINKING HOT COCOA!" the blonde teen spat. Sasori was stupefied at the moment.

"But cocoa's good man," Kisame took another sip of his.

"Hn," Itachi agreed, not really paying attention since his favourite show was on *cough* powerpuffgirls *cough*.

Hidan immediately snapped. He turned off the television, knocked over the kotatsu and smacked Sasori (for some weird reason) all in one second.

"LISTEN YOU ASSFACES! SAKURA LEFT!" Hidan screamed at the top of his lungs. Everyone was dumbfounded; those two words ringing in their heads.

"…wuh…" was all that came out of their mouths.

"How can she leave?! It's like five degrees outside!" Kisame was the first to throw a fit.

"Plus, her coat is still her," Sasori added revealing a tiny red coat perfect for winter (wait why did he have that?)

"Why did she leave in the first place?" Itachi's voice darkened.

Together, Deidara and Hidan pulled two small hands from behind them and dragged the two little elementary boys to the centre of the room so everyone can take a good look at them.

"It's cuz these two idiots fought with each other that Sakura-chan ended up leaving, yeah," Deidara explained, trying to stay calm. Both Naruto and Sasuke pouted in different directions.

Itachi took a hold of their shoulders, "I'm disappointed in the two of you. If you want to become real men, then you can't always make Sakura cry. Do you understand?!" he snapped.

They flinched in response but nodded their heads.

"C'mon already! We don't have friggin time for this!" Hidan butted in.

"He's right," Sasori agreed standing up, "For all we know, little doll could be freezing to death by now."

"Okay! I'll go inform Pein-sama about the situation!" Kisame blurted out getting ready to retrieve their leader.

"Forget it. He's not here. I searched for him too, yeah," Deidara halted him from taking another step.

"Fuck!" Hidan cursed, "Who the hell's second in command then?!"

"Uhh…" Kisame began, "That would be Tobi."

All eyes scanned the room for any sign of an orange object. None was found.

"Screw this!" Naruto shouted, "I'm gonna save Saku-chan myself, believe it!" and he darted out the door.

"Wait for me dobe!" Sasuke followed.

"Stop you two! You're colds will worsen!" Itachi hurried after them and pretty much everyone else left the house out to search for the little pink head girl.

0~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~0

"Thanks for coming with me, Tobi-chan! Piercy-chan!" Sakura beamed, swinging a red shopping bag in her hand.

"Tobi would do anything for Sakura-chan! Tobi's a good boy!" the orange mask teen ruffled the pinkette's hair.

"For the last time, my name's not 'Piercy-chan'," Pein muttered, stuffing his hands in his black winter coat.

"Oh and by the way, thanks for buying me a new coat, Pein-kun (since I forgot mines at Ita-chan's place)!" Sakura thanked the pierced teen.

"I'M TELLING YOU MY NAME'S NOT-…" Pein's cheeks reddened as she grinned at him and he unconsciously reverted his eyes away from her.

"…no prob…" he mumbled. Tobi at the time pretended not to hear anything by singing some Christmas carols.

"SAKURAAAAAAA!" a sudden loud scream was heard through the crowds of the town. As Sakura squinted, she could see something or someone heading towards her. Actually a whole group was coming at her. She seriously wanted to run away until two small bodies dashed in front of them and tackled Sakura, almost to the ground. She noticed it was her two best friends, Naruto and Sasuke.

"SAKURA! WE"RE SORRY!" they apologized in unison and embraced her together. Soon Kisame, Itachi, Hidan, Diedara and Sasori caught up with the two boys, panting like crazy (too much hot chocolate -_-).

Sakura stood there, stunned as the two boys continued hugging her.

"…why are you saying sorry?" she asked blankly. They broke off their hugging and stared wide eyed at the girl as if she were going insane. Everyone watched her the same way (well minus Tobi and Pein).

"C-cuz we made you cry with our fighting!" Naruto tried to remind the girl.

For a minute, Sakura seemed like she was thinking about it and then responded, "OOoohh," she spoke, "Those weren't real tears! I used eye drops when you weren't looking!" she then revealed the miniature bottle of eye drops.

'A woman's best friend?' they all wondered.

"Sooo…you're not mad at us?" Sasuke questioned willingly and tightly squeezed her hand.

She smiled, "Nope!" They both gave a sigh of relief.

"But Sakura-chan," Deidara stooped to her eye level, "Why did you do all this?"

Sakura frowned, "I wanted to buy Naru-Naru's and Sasu-kun's gifts early…"

"So that's why you pretended to cry and ran out?" Itachi questioned, bending down as well.

"Uh-huh…I thought it would distract them," she sniffled.

"Damn right it distracted them! In fact, all of us! We looked everywhere for you! We thought you were-

"Hidan, relax," Pein ordered the pink eyed boy and he immediately shut his mouth. The little pinkette had already began crying and guilt struck his chest.

"But why did you wanna buy us gifts?" Sasuke inquired, trying to wipe away all her tears.

"S-Since I'm your 'Secret Santy'!" she sobbed, "I just wanted to hurry up and get it, but you found out too early! And everyone hates me now!"

"…Sakura…" Naruto and Sasuke squeezed her hand.

Sakura hiccupped as all the passers-by glimpsed at the strange group of kids.

"Oh pinky…" Kisame petted her on the head.

"We would never hate you, little doll," Sasori kissed her forehead.

"T-That's r-r-r-right!" Hidan jumped in while Tobi snickered at him.

"Dry your tears, little one," Pein commanded, "Be strong."

"Let's go home, kay Sakura-chan?" Deidara grinned.

"There's still some takoyaki left," Itachi gave tiny smile, "Though I hope a certain someone cleans up the chocolate cocoa stains from off my father's million dollar rug." Itachi narrowed his eyes at Hidan. He in return jolted.

Sakura laughed happily; she was glad to be Naruto's and Sasuke's 'Secret Santy.' It was certainly going to be a unique Christmas.

0~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~0

Soooooo…did ya like it? Well just rape the smexxi review bottom below! Hehe this was just something I wanted to do since its Christmas an' junk (is it me or did this story make no sense O_O lol) ~ Thank god for oneshotz~ And if you REALLY loved it, here's a little extra:

EXTRA: Sakura,Sasuke, Naruto

"So Saku-chan! What'd you buy for us?"

"Oh…uhh…here! THESE!"

"O_O"

"Weeeeelllllllll? Do you guys like it?"

"…what are these, Sak?"

"Can't you tell? They're mini punching bags!"

"Why are they shaped like dolls though?"

"Oh, cuz when I saw the two of you fighting, this is what I came up with for a gift~ So instead of fighting, you can draw each other's face on them and relieve your stress by punching it! Cool huh~ The lady at the store told me about them."

"…Sak. I'm pretty sure these are voodoo dolls."

"What?! Nuh-uh!"

"Saku-chan. You got scamed."

"S-Seriously?!"

"Yup. Where is this store anyway?"

"…Weeeellll it actually wasn't a store…more like an old lady selling stuff behind a dumpster."

"WH-WHAT!? THEN YOU WOULD'VE SURELY BE SUSPICIOUS OF IT!"

"W-w-well! How was I supposed to know?! I'm only 10 y'know!"

"Wait, weren't Tobi and Pein with you?"

"Yeah, but they kinda got scared of the old lady and waited for me 12 feet away from the dumpster…"

"Sigh…well at least you didn't buy anything else from her."

"Uhh…Is it too late to mention I also bought a box of chocolates and gave it to the guys earlier?"

DOWNSTAIRS:

"Urk! Why's there puke all over the place?!"

"And everyone's passed out…have you learned your lesson Sak?"

"E-Everyone!" D: