"You want me to act like we never kissed"
Flashback
We were sitting on the dock waiting for our parents to finishing packing to return to forks. The most we had talked all weekend was a 2 minute conversation about the wheather. I know right such an original topic of conversation, But those two minutes where the best of my life, until now that is.
Right now as the sun is just rising we are having the first proper conversation we have ever had. You would think with our parents being friends and taking us on these weekend trips to the lake every year since we were 12 that we could be closer, but that not the case, you are and have always been the big man at school the amazing Edward Cullen and you couldnt be seen talking to a nobody like me it would kill your reputation. So that is the reason we are here at the age of 17 having our first conversation in the 15 years we have known each other.
Pathetic i know. I cant stop looking at your eyes they are the brightest shade of green, so deep with knowledge and confidence. I envy that about you, your confidence. I wish i was more like that, maybe then you would want to talk to me.
You keep asking me tons of questions like you are actually interested in the answers, i know that cant be true seeing as my answers are seriously boring but for right now im going to pretend that you really want to know all of these things about me.
"Bella?" . .
"BELLA!"
"huh . . what?" i said in a daze as i realised i had be starring at your soft lips and completly iqnoring what you were saying.
"Are you alright?" you say with those oh so kissable lips
" o yea im fine. what where you saying?"
"I was wanting to ask you something?"
"Ask me"
"why is it we have never had the chance to really talk? i mean we have known each other for 15 years and this is the first we have actually held out a conversation."
"erm . . you never seem to have the time for talking. When we are at the lake your cellphone is constantly stuck to your hand and anytime we tried to talk it beeped and you would run of to answer who ever was texting you. not that i blame you i mean your Edward Cullen there is bound to be tons of people wanting to talk to you when your not at home" i say though i wish i hadnt maybe saying all that would sound rude and make you hate me.
You actually looked quite shocked for a minute.
"oh . . right. . i never noticed i did that"
I just smiled slighted at him not really sure what to say.
It was slient for a while, and a awkward slience at that. when he be broke the slience it was with a statement that i was not expecting.
"you know your the first person i have met that has actually wanted to hear what i had to say. All the people at school are only arround me because of my familys wealth and status in society" the was a hit of saddness in your voice as you spoke
and yes the cullen family were extremely wealthy. His mother Esme has been in so many blockbuster movies i cant even count them and his dad Carlisle was the owner of the biggest law ferm in the country. they moved to forks to try and keep some normalicy in there lives although it has been difficult recently as his older sister Alice who just so happens to be my bestfriend, has recently produced her own clothing line and it is sending the family to the front cover of the tabliods once again.
"God thats awful, you know you can come to me anytime you want to talk"
"yea thanks . . . Bella i want to try something is that ok?" You had this look in your eyes, one that showed you were determined to do this and i had a feeling i was going to like what was about to happen
" su-sure" i said with a shaky voice as your face started moving closer to mine. o god i cant believe this is happening,my heart feels like its going to jump out my throat. slowly your mouth got closer to mine until your lips brushed against my own. god it was like every part of my body was on fire and i needed more. my hands tangled in your hair and crushed our lips together. Our mouths moving in sync setting my body a light. I swear it was like nothing i had ever felt, which is true as this would be my first kiss.
You pull away when our bodies decide we need more oxygen, our breaths heavy and hearts racing.
"my god bella . . that was amazing"
I gigled and agreed "yea amazing"
Back to the present
"yes bella i do, we cant keep this up when we get back to forks, you know that" It was two hours after the kiss and we where just about to head home when you pulled me aside to talk.
"why because of your stupid reputation"
"no because i know what they would do to you if they found out we kissed, i shouldnt have started it and it will never happen again. just pretend we never met" and with that you walked away
"you want to forget? pretend we never met" i said into the air and then broke down in tears
Flashback
We were two when we first met, though i cant remember that so i'll skip to the time we first went to the lake with out families.
Your family had just pulled up in the car and alice bounced out like an over excited puppy to gave me a hug. You followed soon after texting on your cell phone and my goodness you where beautful. Even back then with your gorgeous penny coloured hair that stuck out in every direction possible and those amazing green eyes that would make any girl fall for you
"hi im Bella" i said with a smile
"eh yea hi, Edward" you said without looking up from your phone and walking past me to your families cabin. Even then i thought it was weird thatyou had a phone at 12 but heh your family is loaded i shouldnt have been surprised. Every year since then we berly spoke more than a few words to each other.
Back to the present and two weeks later
Iv tried and iv tried and iv tried.
but i havnt yet
I havnt yet forgot about you, or that kiss. I have tried so fricking hard but i cant seem to get you out of my head, i cry myself to sleep at night and wake up with tears running down my face telling me i have been dreaming about you again.
Even alice tried to help when she dragged me out 2 nights ago to try and chear me up.
Flashback to two nights ago
"Right bella im sick of this" Alice said as she came storming into my room "I am sick of you laying aroung feeling sorry forself over a guy. I cant even help you because you wont even tell me who he is. So instead of helping you win the guy over im gona help you forget him." She said with a smile as she trailed me out of bed and into the bathroom
"Alice what are you going on about and why are you shoving me in the bathroom?" i said with anger becasue i was really comfortable in my bed.
"I my dear friend am saying that we are going out, the club down in port angles is having an under 18s night so we are getting dressed up and helping you forget about whoever you are crushing on and finding you a new man"
" Alice i really don. . " I paused at the look on her face that said you really dont wana argue with me tonight.
"Fine fine ill go" and with that she let out a high pitched squeal and pushed me in the shower.
Back to the present
I did go out that night but im sorry to say that it did not help at all. Alice made me dance with like 10 guys that were all really cute but i couldnt forget about you and our kiss.
Bless her Alice really did try to help, she even snuck me some alcohol she was able to buy seeing as she is over 21 but even that didnt help I didnt even drink it all. I could see she was getting upset, not at me but for me, so i left early when her boyfriend Jasper and her friends showed up. I didnt want to ruin their night just because i was depressed.
Right now I am standing at my locker on the first day back to school after summer trying to sort out my books. I have my head phones in sound i didnt hear you walk by but i knew you were there. That tingling i getting all over my body when you near, thats what made me turn round and see you walking up the hall way surrounded by your friends laughing about something. Its the first time id seen you since you walked away from me at the lake.
Our eyes meet and my hearts beat 10 times faster than normal when i see that sad longing look in your eyes as you walk by.
You walk by and i fall to pieces.