This takes place shortly after Rachel has a baby when Jack slides the pamphlets under the door and realises that it isn't Monica and Chandler in there so asks the people in there to pass them back out. (If anyone knows the episode name, would be appreciated.) We know Monica and Chandler weren't in there as we see them walk past and Ross and Rachel were with Emma. So… who was it in the closet? One-off Joey and Phoebe fan-fic.

Phoebe passes the pamphlets under the door back to Jack. Phoebe and Joey stand awkwardly in the closet.

"So, I guess we should go back out there."

"No, not yet, in case Jack's still out there."

"Yeah you're right."

They stand in the closet in silence for a few seconds. Joey picks up a mop, turns in upside down then puts the handle of the mop down his shirt.

"Joey, what are you doing?"

"I've got an itch on my back and I can't reach it to scratch it so…" He gestures towards the mop.

"You know you could just ask me to scratch it."

"Yeah, that would've looked a lot less stupid."

"So you want me to scratch it for you?"

"If you want."

Phoebe scratches Joey's back.

"That feels nice."

"Well I am a masseuse, so…"

"I envy your job."

"Why?"

"Because you get paid to look at naked chicks!"

"Joey, I do not get paid to look at naked chicks, I get paid to give people "an uplifting, yet relaxing experience" and anyway you're an actor.

"So?!"

"So… you get paid to kiss a lot of attractive women!"

"Yeah, that's true. I like being an actor."

"Ugh, you are so shallow!"

"How am I shallow?"

"The only things you think about are… naked chicks and sandwiches, you've never even once tried to settle down with someone or widen your interests, not once!"

"Whoa, I have tried to widen my interests outside of food and chicks."

"Name one."

"Fireball!"

"A game that could seriously injure people, and it quite frankly frightening, doesn't count as widening your interests!"

"Oh, ok. There is this one… woman I like, but I don't know if she likes me back. We're good friends, and I don't want to ruin that."

"Firstly, don't say woman like it's a disease and secondly, why don't you tell her? I mean I get that you don't want to lose her as a friend, but it's worth a shot, right? Anyway, if you lose her as a friend, you'll still have me."

Well that's the thing… if I tell her, I might lose you as a friend."

"Joey… please tell me you don't like Ursula again."

"No… I don't like Ursula, I like… Ursula's twin sister."

There is silence for a few moments, Joey looks down at the floor and shifts awkwardly from one foot to the other.

"You like me?"

Joey nods in response.

"How long for?"

"A couple of… weeks"

"Joey?"

"A couple of months."

"How come you didn't tell me?"

"I wanted to, Pheebs, but I was so scared of losing you as a friend."

"Well, you are going to lose me as a friend."

Joey has a hurt look on his face.

"But… you're going to gain me as a girlfriend!"

"That wasn't very nice. You… you tried to mess with my feelings!"

"Yeah, I did, Gotcha!"

"Really… you want me to be your boyfriend?"

"Yes, Joey, I want you to be my boyfriend."

"Awesome! Now go make me a sandwich, all this… emotional stuff has made me hungry."

"In a hospital? I can buy you a sandwich, but not make it, is that good enough?"

"Yeah." He grins from ear to ear.

"But, first, come here."

Joey walks closer to Phoebe. Phoebe puts both hands on the side of Joey's face and kisses him.

"I love you Joey Tribbiani."

"I love you too Phoebe Buffay."

They walk out of the closet holding hands, cautiously making sure that no-one they know is around.

"I'll go get you that sandwich."

"Make sure it has bacon."

"You betcha."