This is what I get for developing an affinity for the sand sibblings.
"Hello. You may know me as Temari, the totally hott kunoichi from the famous anime show Naruto."
"And I'm Kankuro, the Puppet Master." Kankuro winked. A redhead standing behind him grunted. "Oh, and that's Gaara," Kankuro jerked his thumb in Gaara's direction. Gaara glared at his back. "And we're here to discuss a very important issue."
"Yes, as much as we adore our fans writing stories about us there has been some discrepencies."
"Yes, this issue would be the stories you, the fan base general, refers to as 'sandcest'."
"It's disgusting." Gaara muttered with crossed arms.
"Before any one can get angry, please allow us to justify ourselves." Kankuro held up his hands in a dis-alarming fashion.
"Imagine making out with your brother." Temari twitched. "That's what you're doing to me. With them." She grimaced, looking away from her brothers.
"It's disgusting." Gaara's eyes were a look of abject horror.
"And anyway, Temari digs those stories about Shika-kun anyhow." Kankuro smirked, before Temari sucker punched him. "Kidding, kidding big sis." He laughed forcefully. Looking away he made ugly faces, muttering many curses.
"Just think about it. Heck, yaoi is better than sandcest." Temari muttered pleadingly towards the audience.
Gaara and Kankuro glared daggers at her, while she pretened to be oblivious. "Of course you wouldn't mind yaoi. IT'S FOR BOYS!" Kankuro screamed.
"It's disgusting." Again Gaara re-iterated.
"And seriously, where do people get the idea that Kiba and I would hit it off? Really? I mean if they had to pair me up with any Naruto character I would have thought it would have been Baki."
Gaara tilted his head curiously. Temari cocked an eyebrow, "Baki? Our sensei, Baki? Why him?"
Kankuro shrugged, "The whole concept of teacher and student in an forbidden love, quite dramatic and poetic, like something you would see in a play..." Kankuro faltered.
"Wait, why have you even contemplated which character you would hook up with?" Temari now very curious.
"I... er... uh... this is awkward..." Kankuro mumbled rubbing his neck.
"It's disgusting," Gaara wrinkled his nose. Kankuro glared.
"Can you say anything else?!" The Puppet Master narrowed his eyes. The Kazekage smirked. "I hate you right now."
"Yeah, but you don't hate Baki now do you?" Gaara's face resembled that of the Cheshire Cat. Temari snorted, ducking a blow from the angry and questionable Kankuro.
"Okay, alright." Temari wiped a tear from her eye. "Just think about what we said in regards to sandcest." Kankuro nodded in agreement.
Gaara stepped forward, and cleared his throat. "Yes, please take into consideration our plea. And also if many fan fictions arise in honor of Baki and Kankuro relationships, I condone and will be an avid supporter-" Kankuro attempted to launch an assault on him, but was easily thwarted by Gaara's sand. "But if you do insist on writing this filth called 'sandcest' please be aware that I will hunt you down, and skin you alive with my sand, all the while laughing at your misery. There is no escape from my sand." Gaara grinned splitting his face in two, not once did he blink.
Temari and Kankuro slowly edged away from Gaara. "Alright folks, it was great talking to you, but ah, look at the time. Temari remember that thing?" Kankuro said turning around heading for the door.
"Right! Yeah, that thing!" They both ran out of the room.
Gaara's smile faded. "That concludes our public service announcement." Gaara turned and walked out, Kazekage robes flowing behind him.
~fin
Well... that's it. I dunno if I really like it, but maybe someone else will... aurdox signing off.