Author's Notes:
Hey there people. Well, a few things. One, you should know I've never seen ALL of Yu Yu Hakusho, and don't even know the whole exact, precise story (such as how it ends, for that matter), so if there are a few things that are inaccurate and such, please don't jump on me. This is a simple fic, doesn't really have much to do with the actual story, I'm just weaving a bit of romance between my favorite characters (and a popular couple). So if there's some rule for returning back to the Makai that I'm missing, well, sorry. It isn't really THAT important in this fic. Bear with me. It's pretty much...sap and angst. Two is that I don't usually write for this fandom, so if you absolutely hate it, don't worry, I don't have anything else here for you to hate. Comments appreciated, flames will be ignored. This is Hiei's POV, so I hope I did a somewhat accurate portrayal. Enjoy! -Cora )
"Red Hair"
Rooftops and trees were but mere blurs tinted gold by the setting sun as I passed them. The leaves didn't even make a sound when I finally settled on a branch outside of a window that looked into his dwelling here in the Ningenkai. If I was successful tonight, it would be the last time that I would ever have to see it.
I don't belong here.
I could sense him there, and I knew he could sense my own presence. I sat down on the branch, leaning against the trunk and watched him there. He was asleep. I cast a glance around with my eyes. It wasn't even dark yet, but he was sleeping. Red hair made a striking contrast with the white sheets, like it was silken blood…
Red hair…
Why do you so stubbornly stay in that form…?
He was facing the window as he slept, an expression genuinely blank; neither smile nor frown. One hand lay beside his face, fingers curved into graceful half-circles. The other hand curled around the sheets that covered him, his bare shoulders still visible…
I blinked. What was I doing? I came here to talk, not to stare. Why was I being such a fool? The sooner I got it over with, the sooner I could return to the Makai.
But I didn't move from the tree. Instead I only turned my head from the window to stare blankly ahead. My objective was to convince him to come with me, seeing as it was no longer necessary for us to stay here. However, no matter what his answer, I was resolved to leave the Ningenkai that night. Whether or not he came with me was his decision.
We don't belong here.
"Hiei?"
The voice broke me from my thoughts. I blinked again and looked back down at the window, where he now stood. He had awoken after noticing me in his mind. He looked up at me. That hair that betrayed him to be a human fell down his bare back and over his shoulders. Red hair. Human. As much as I wanted to deny it, there was only one word to describe him, even in that disgusting facade.
Beautiful.
We watched each other for a long moment that passed by unnoticed, my eyes meeting his, which were as green as the leaves that surrounded me.
Beautiful…
"What are you doing?"
I regarded him for another moment in silence before I stood, and then was on the ground by the window in the next instant.
"Is there something wrong?"
"No, I just need to talk to you," I said, looking up at him since he was a head taller than I. But then I am short compared to almost anyone.
"Oh," he stepped back from the window, "please, come in." I stepped lightly through it.
"What is it?" he asked once I was inside.
I looked at him silently out of the corners of my eyes before I answered. The golden tint of the sunset fell on him, as a holy light would shine on the divine. I knew the truth. He was anything but holy…
"Hiei?" he prompted patiently, softly.
I turned so that he was staring at my back while I stared at a spot on his wall.
"I'm going back to the Makai," I said finally.
It was his turn to be silent as he considered my words.
"I see."
I turned when I heard him sit back down on the bed. His hands hung limply between his knees, head bowed so that I couldn't see his eyes beneath his hair.
Red hair…
I felt my hands tighten into fists, my eyes narrowed again. I turned back to the wall. "I wanted to know if you would come with me."
There was more silence. Longer this time. I waited.
Unfortunately I don't have as much patience as he does. I took his silence as the answer he knew that I wouldn't want to hear.
I turned halfway and looked at him. For a reason I couldn't explain, I felt almost angry.
"Don't tell me you want to stay here." It was more of a warning than it was a question.
A soft laugh escaped him, but it was a sad one.
"I guess I can't leave…not yet."
A noise at the back of my throat betrayed my disgust. "Don't be a fool, Kurama. There's no reason for us to stay here. We're finally allowed to go back to the Makai, where we belong."
You don't belong here…
"But I have a reason, Hiei," he said softly.
I scoffed and folded my arms across my chest. "And what is that?" I asked sharply, staring at that stupid wall. "Your human mother?"
Again his silence confirmed my question.
"She's not sick anymore Kurama, she can take care of herself again and doesn't need someone to watch over her all of the time. Why do you keep insisting on – "
I stopped suddenly as a thought occurred to me. Why was I trying so hard to convince him to return to the Makai? Should not a simple yes or no have satisfied me? Why did I care so much whether or not he came with me?
It didn't matter did it?
There was silence. I put my hands in my pockets, not having anything more to say until he said something or my patience ran out. Whichever came first would decide if I left without another word…
"I'm sorry Hiei, but I don't think that I can bring myself to leave the Ningenkai yet." His words were soft and sad, but they were frustratingly calm. Kurama was always calm.
I clenched my fists for a moment, feeling my frustration build, then relaxed them, letting my anger dissolve. I closed my eyes.
"And that is your decision then?"
"…Yes."
They opened. I turned and walked toward the window. "Then I guess this is goodbye."
I crouched in the open window, ready to disappear from his sight and the Ningenkai, to let him stay with humans for however long he wished to continue with his foolishness. I was about to leave and never come back when he stopped me.
"Wait – "
I sensed the urgency in his voice more than I heard it. A moment later I was feeling it too. I am one of the fastest apparitions in existence, but somehow he still managed to catch me off guard.
One hand clasped onto my shoulder as the other clung to my waist. Any worries that I had about falling off of the ledge were instantly replaced by the realization and sensation of his lips against mine. My heart stopped. Something somewhere deep inside me hurt for an instant. It was cold and painful but strangely pleasurable at the same time. I didn't know how to react. My mind had simply stopped altogether. He clung to me; our lips pressed together, my eyes open with surprise, his red hair brushing against my face.
Red hair. A false illusion covering his true form, concealing everything that gave any hint to what he really was.
I don't know how long we kissed. Time had seemed to stop along with everything else. His fingers curled into my clothing desperately, as though he was trying to delay me as long as possible.
He doesn't want you to go as much as you want him to come with you.
Did I share his feelings, the ones he had for me that drove him to this desperate act?
You don't belong here…Was I willing to return to the Makai without him?
He doesn't belong here…Perhaps the better question would be whether or not I even could leave him.
Red hair…
He broke out contact gently, pulling slightly away, but still leaving only inches. Neither of us were breathless, despite not breathing for what seemed like several minutes. Kurama opened his eyes slowly, looking up at me. Those green eyes that displayed their usual expressions: confident, calm, unrepentant. He smiled, I assumed, at the expression on my own face. Whether he saw my surprise or blank indifference, I don't know.
"Please forgive me if I was too forward, Hiei," he said, straightening and releasing me from his hold.
At his statement I merely shrugged and looked away from him. "Don't worry about it," I said, my voice staying even, like nothing had happened just a moment before.
The last light of the sun was quickly waning. The silver moon was already glowing, moving higher into the sky with every passing second. I didn't move. My mind had trouble convincing my body to leave his side.
You don't belong…"Are you still going to leave?" a whisper.
I stared at the windowsill I was still in. The position was ironically a perfect metaphor. On one side was the way back to the Makai; the way back to our true home. The other was to climb down into his room and stay in the human realm. I was caught in the middle.
"I don't suppose there is any way I can convince you." I didn't look at him. Didn't dare.
There was a small pause. Silence was heavy between us.
"Is there any way I can convince you to stay?"
It was my turn to be silent in contemplation. Could I accept that human part of him any longer? Would I be satisfied to remain here for a few more years if I were with him?
No. I turned away and closed my eyes so tightly it was painful. No. I had already decided. I was leaving tonight, with or without him.
My eyes opened, but despite the indecision that had played in my mind, my face revealed nothing.
"I'm going."
I could almost feel the sadness flowing off of him as he spoke. "Then I will miss you, my friend."
A muscle in my face twitched. "Friend" didn't seem to be the correct word to use considering what had happened only a few minutes ago. I said nothing in reply to that.
After several minutes of silence, he spoke again.
"…I thought you were going to leave, Hiei." His voice was painfully quiet, and if I had been anything other than what I am I would have thought I'd imagined it.
I turned my gaze back to him. He was watching me intently with those eyes. Human eyes.
Red hair…he doesn't belong…you don't belong…I shook my head. Even if I did reciprocate his feelings, the desire to return had been steadily growing for longer than I cared to remember. I couldn't stay.
"I am going." I turned one last time, and could have sworn, though it was nearly full dark, that I glanced great sorrow on his face. "Good-bye, Kurama."
I leapt from the windowsill to the tree, and fled to the gateway to the Makai with all of the speed I could manage.
- owari -