Hi Everyone! This is my first attempt at this, hence the short chapter. If people like it though, I can continue it so please comment if you do :)
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"This never should have happened to me… I never should have left myself off guard like that. I can never really protect myself, can I? I'm just an open book that is manipulated and exploited by everyone around me, and all I can do is let it happen. But now I have nowhere else to run, I'm going to have to deal with this, because now I know better… I won't be caught off guard again."
Chapter 1: New School, Old Problems-
The sun blinded me as I got out the car, with the obnoxious stench of the ocean polluting my nostrils. I was only in this forsaken wreck of a town for four hours, and I already hated it. But I had to come here, Balamb, population: four thousand, five hundred and seven, to get away from her. She ruined my life, turned my friends against me, stole my life, and I ran like the coward I am. I was a lion stuck in a cage, being poked and prodded, unable to fight back, but all that is over. I won't leave myself vulnerable again.
I began to walk towards the shabby building, with a wooden sign that said "Balamb Secondary School" with several letters missing, as my father yelled something to me, but I didn't care for what he had to say as I just waved to him apathetically as I continued walked into the building.
If the school looked shabby on the outside, it looked like a shack on the inside, with paint visibly chipping off the walls, ceiling tiles missing and worst of all was a crudely painted blue bear, which must have been the school mascot standing in the middle of the entrance hall. I found a sign half hanging off its hinges saying "office" and followed the arrow. I must have stood out the whole time, 'cause everyone I walked by stared at me everywhere I went. I couldn't stand it. I could also hear whispers from the small crowd like "who's the new guy?" or "he looks kinda cute" but I just kept my head down. It was the only way to protect myself. Anyone of these people could have hurt me, so I had to stay away.
When I thought I was almost there, I turned a corner and was hit by a freight train that almost knocked me off my feet. Upon further observation, I realized the train was actually a girl, who was now on the ground, rubbing her head in obvious pain. I wanted to help her, but I couldn't get a word out; I was both in shock from the sudden collision and I also didn't want to make the first move… I've already learned that mistake once.
As she got to her feet, I was able to make her out better, her green eyes we almost not visible through her brunette hair that flipped at her shoulders. Though she must have been high school age, I was significantly taller than she was, as she was able to fit into a small yellow dress that could of passed as a shirt on a regular sized person.
"There" she muttered as she fixed herself, her voice already annoying me because she sounded more like a mouse then a person. Even still, I stood there in silence. "Hey, you're in 12th year right?" she questioned me with a look in her eyes that made me want to cringe, as I awkwardly nodded yes. "Good, then do you know where homeroom is, I'm kinda lost?" she questioned again, this time her head tilting to the side almost like a confused puppy.
I couldn't deal with her. She put me off completely with her personality and all I could spit out was a "find your own way" as I continued walking, entering the office finally.
As it turns out, there are so few students at Balamb Secondary that everyone in the same year has the same homeroom, much to my dismay. Walking in late, the girl in the yellow dress gave me a dirty eye from the second row as I entered. My entering broke the teacher off mid-sentence as the entire room started looking at me. The teacher looked down at his clipboard and quickly spat "and you are?"
"Squall… Leonhart" I calmly said as I glanced around the room looking for a seat, and the entire back row was empty, save for a blonde haired guy sitting back there, but before I got head over there, the teacher spoke to me again.
"Mr. Leonhart, I don't know what you may have been used to in Esther but here if you do not show up to class as scheduled, you waste the classes time and more importantly, you waste my time. If you do this again, you will be punished, understood?"
I already hated the guy as not only did he manage to single me out in front of the entire class, but I was drowning in his ego, there was so much. I wanted to defend myself, to fight off my attacker, but the words never came. I froze there, unable to make eye contact with the man. To get out of the situation, I coldly muttered "whatever" as I began to walk to my chosen seat in the back row.
The teacher, who later introduced himself as Mr. Walker, gave up dealing with me thankfully as he proceeded with the class, and with his endless, worthless speech, the one hour class felt like four.
I managed to make it to lunch without another confrontation, but that stares continued. I was quickly reaching my breaking point as I silently navigated the hallways to the cafeteria, wanted everyone to just go away. Thankfully, after getting my food, I was able to find an empty table in the back, and I sat down in the plastic chair where the table barely made it over my knees, as I began to eat. That's when it all stated to go downhill… that's when I met Rinoa Heartilly.
She came into the cafeteria with three other people: a guy who could blind someone with his blonde hair that reminded me of a chicken and a tattoo on his face, a cowboy want a be walking with an arrogant strut, and a blond girl dressed very professional with glasses to match. And they were walking towards me. The chicken headed guy made it to me first, and I quickly glanced at his tray to see seven hotdogs lined up neatly. "Uhh… you're in our spot man" he informed me as I began to collect my stuff to leave.
Rinoa stopped my leaving though, saying "It's alright Zell, he's new. He's probably looking for people to hang out with".
This was a very bad situation, one that I needed to escape at all costs. These people wanted to "hang" out with me… they wanted to be my friends. I learned firsthand how quickly friends can turn though, and I never wanted to feel that way again. For the first time today, I finally found the confidence to speak more than a one-liner.
"I'm not interested to hang out with anyone, actually I specifically sat here so I didn't have to deal with people, so thanks for the invite, but I don't want friends" I angrily said, visibly surprising the group. I stood up, grabbed my tray, and went to leave, but she followed me.
I only made it back into the hallway when she caught up with me, her surprise now turned into anger as she marched towards me like a soldier on a mission. I wasn't getting away.
"What the hell is you're problem?" she demanded.
This question was a mouthful. It's not like I could be like "I have major social anxiety because my ex-girlfriend broke up with me, turned my friends against me, and eventually made me the verbal and literal punching bag for the entire school". I had to think of something fast, I had to get away.
"That's none of your business now leave me alone" I said as I tried to turn away, but she grabbed my arm, preventing my escape.
"I was trying to be nice" she began, with her voice steadily rising, making everyone stare at us, and stare at me. "You don't have to be such an asshole about it."
The time for my escape was now. I forced myself out of her grip and turned away to leave, but as I was walking away, a voice trailed after me saying "You're a coward, you can only run away". I don't know if it was Rinoa or I was just hearing it in my head, but I managed to get away. I retreated into a single washroom and locked the door behind me.
The voice from before echoed again saying, "You thought you were worthy of me? How pathetic! You're scum!" as I dropped to my knees. My heart was racing, and my breathing was uncontrollable. The voice continued taunting me as I further lost control of myself. I thought the panic attacks would have went away when I left Esther, but they were just has bad… maybe worse.
This never should have happened to me… I never should have left myself off guard like that. I can never really protect myself, can I? I'm just an open book that is manipulated and exploited by everyone around me, and all I can do is let it happen. But now I have nowhere else to run, I'm going to have to deal with this, because now I know better… I won't be caught off guard again.