NIGHTMARES AT HINATA HOUSE
Women…one of the only few creatures that I may never understand…
Who I am?
Rhanar is my name; Rhanar Narra-Jar, former warrior of Shacar-Jarcu,
ancient realm of the Elves of Darkness.
My tale is long and maybe too fantastic to believe, but someone would better know of this the day I die.
Now, where should I begin…?
Ah, yes:
(Introduction): The failed Experiment
RHANAR: quiet angry: Tanrisa, just WHAT is the point of dragging me from the middle of my sleep, teleporting me to your church?
If your priests find me here they will likely try to kill me.
Besides; did you just want to show me some damned, 'magical portal'?
TANRISA: quiet proud: It is not just a 'magical portal', my dark-skinned elf; THIS portal makes me capable of reaching new planes of Existence; just imagine: New worlds to explore, new folklore to learn, and, in YOUR case, more enemies to vanquish.
RHANAR: Laughing evilly: Now you are talking MY language!
-Tanrisa seems all too lost in his magical chantings to notice anything around him; the portal glows stronger and stronger, clearly feeding on his divine powers-
TANRISA: slightly nervous and exhausted: I do not understand; it is not supposed to drain me…like…this…urghh!
-As the portal grows stronger and stronger, Tanrisa loses more and more of his power-
TANRISA: Greatly exhausted: I HAVE to close it! If not, who knows what it may be able to do to the mortals of Varran. Forgive me, Rhanar; your conquest MUST wait!
RHANAR: very angry: You bird-brain! I will not let a damn portal stop me! Now, STAND ASIDE!
-Rhanar jumps into the portal, not caring for Tanrisa's warnings-
TANRISA: Quiet scared: RHAN-N-N-NA…!
-The portal closes, leaving Tanrisa panting and exhausted-
TANRISA: Bitter and angry: Damn that dark-skinned slayer! Now: How can I get that portal reopened and save the fool?
CHAPTER 1: THE HORRORS BEGIN
-As Tanrisa wanders Heaven in search of answers to his crisis, the portal which swallowed Rhanar appears in another dimension of Reality:
Tokyo, 2000, Hinata House-
RHANAR: falling from the sky, into a poo, VERY angry: When I get my hands on that…!
-Pulling himself from the water, he begins to notice a figure appear from the warm waters-
RHANAR: Drawing the WraithBlade, every sign of combat-lust shown:
Come on! Show yourself, coward!
MOTOKO: Very angry: WHO ARE YOU CALLING COWARD, PERVERTED BASTARD!
-Before Rhanar can react, the voice turns out to be a woman; a young, teenage woman, naked and armed with a black katana-
RHANAR: Caught of guard by the beauty of the strange woman: By The Go-
AR-R-R-G-G-H-H!
-The young woman leaps to attack, her sword raised in a typical attack position-
RHANAR: Smiling evilly and parrying her attacks with ease: If you think you can defeat me, then come and try your luck!
MOTOKO: Smiling evilly: With pleasure! GIRLS! KEITARO'S HERE! HELP!
RHANAR: completely confused and caught off guard: 'Kei'-what?
-Three other naked girls barge into the pool, jumping in, all laughing most evilly-
RHANAR: Smiling evilly: Reinforcements, already? Do you not have honour, girl?
MOTOKO: Quiet confused: You don't sound like Keitaro. Who are you!
-Meanwhile, the other girls tries to drown Rhanar in the pool, but constantly keeps pulling him up to taunt him-
RHANAR: Trying to speak while at the surface of the water: I would…like…to tell you…if you'd…stop these…witches…drowning me!
MOTOKO: Laughing: OK, he's had enough; pull him up!
RHANAR: Taking of his hood, revealing his dark skin and white hair:
Now; why did you try to drown me, ladies?
-As all the girls stares at Rhanar, then starts screaming in panic-
NARU: Panicking: ARGH! A DEMON!
SU: Curious: Demon? Do they taste good?
KITSUNE: Angry/Scared: Shut up, Su!
MOTOKO: Ready for battle: Leave this to me, girls; I'll show that perverted demon…!
RHANAR: Really angry: FIRST YOU TRY TO KILL ME, THEN YOU BABBLE LIKE HENS! ANSWER ME! NOW!
-A quiet embarrassing silence-
KITSUNE: Smiling nervously: Umm, heh heh, please tell us first; just who are you?
RHANAR: Proudly responding to the question: I am Rhanar Narra-Jar, second son of Empress Shinris Narra-Jar of Shacar-Jarcu.
KITSUNE: Sneaky: Oh, that means you've got to be quiet rich, eh?
RHANAR: Nervously looking at Kitsune: Ummm, just 'what' passes through your mind right now, woman?
NARU: Angry: NO, Kitsune! Don't even think of abducting him!
KITSUNE: Offended: Hey! Take it easy; I was only…
-Rhanar cuts of their conversation with a burst of laughter-
RHANAR: Breathing heavily after his outburst: You teenage girls thought of abducting 'me'?
That is the most stupid I have ever heard; I am Rhanar, an elite warrior of Shacar-Jarcu; you are but mere girls, and…
-Rhanar shuts up, as the blade of a black katana touches his throat-
MOTOKO: REALLY angry: ONE MORE WORD FROM YOUR MOUTH, YOU BASTARD, AND I'M GONNA CUT YOU TO PIECES!
-Despite the threat on his life, Rhanar seems cold and sarcastic-
RHANAR: Sarcastic and taunting: 'You'? Killing 'me'? Oh please, look at you;
with those techniques you showed before I wonder how your master would even dare call you a 'warrior'.
And look at your sword; it is all but a butter knife compared to my Wraith-Bla…
-The other girls start to scream, making Rhanar turn around: Motoko's body has turned all crimson, and her hair like flames-
DEMON-MOTOKO: Bloodthirsty: PREPEARE TO BE VANQUISHED, MORTAL!
SU: Happily jumping around: Yipee! Motoko wanna play with the new guy!
RHANAR: Showing clear signs of fear: Umm, my lady, could we not just discuss this like mature adults…?
-The demonic Motoko leaps to attack, forcing Rhanar to run for his life-
RHANAR: Clearly afraid and forgetting that he actually got a weapon on his back, running around the pool in circles with an angry demon behind him, his dignity forgotten for the moment:
HELP ME, IN ILLIRIAN'S NAME; I DO NOT WANT TO DIE SO EARLY!
-Unwilling and unable to help, the three other girls starts laughing-
NARU: Laughing loudly: Look at that 'oh-so-honourable warrior'; running like a chicken!
KITSUNE: Laughing: He's gonna break the world record if you ask me!
SU: Playing commentator: And it's Motoko around the first round of the pool, clearly gaining on Rhanar the Newcomer, no, now it's Rhanar who has the upper hand, and…
-After a while, and several rounds around the pool, Motoko seems to gear down, her 'inner demon' leaving her-
MOTOKO: Coming back to herself: Urgh! I hate when I lose myself! Now, where's that damned, black-skinned bastard!
RHANAR: Sitting on the rooftop, yelling: UP HERE! PLEASE GET A LADDER!
-After a lot of laughing, the girls decide to help Rhanar get down-
RHANAR: Climbing down the ladder, smiling: I must say, you really succeeded in scaring me there, woman.
MOTOKO: Blinking/laughing: Next time you'd better be careful with what you say, Rhanar.
RHANAR: Bowing to Motoko, remembering his manners I apologize for my rudeness, my lady. Now; who are you girls?
MOTOKO: I am Motoko Aoyama.
NARU: Smilling: I am Naru Narusegawa, but just call me Naru.
KITSUNE: Blinking: I'm Mitsune Konno, but call me Kitsune.
SU: Jumping happily up and down: I'm Su! Kaolla Su! But call me SU!
RHANAR: Bowing: Intresting names, my ladies, but tell me now; where am I? The last thing I remember was that I was swallowed by a magical portal, and…
KITSUNE: Giggling hysterically:
A…'GIGGLE'…'magical' portal…'GIGGLE'…!
-Before Kitsune gets a chance to laugh, Motoko slaps her hand over the mouth,. shutting her up-
NARU: Confused: Portal, you say? I don't know of any 'portals' around here; maybe you have played too much Final Fantasy, mate.
RHANAR: Confused: 'Final'-what? Oh, it does not matter; look, I swear on my honour that I am not part of this world; I was teleported here by that damned Angel-God Tanrisa, and…
-Unable to hold back any longer, Kitsune wrestles free of Motoko, falling to the ground in hysterical laughter-
MOTOKO: Yelling to drown Kitsune's roar of laughter:
I DO NOT KNOW OF ANY MAGICAL PORTALS! BUT IN THE MEANTIME YOU MIGHT HAVE TO STAY HERE UNTIL WE FIGURE OUT HOW TO GET YOU BACK TO YOUR OWN WORLD AGAIN!
SU: Cheering happily: YIPEE! The funny new guy can stay!
-The sound of Kitsune's laughter has attracted another figure; a mature-looking teenage boy emerges from the door to the pool, his glasses covered in moisture-
KEITARO: Confused: Umm, girls? What's all that laughing for?
-An embarrassing silence-
NARU: Furiously kicking Keitaro in his face: YOU PERVERTED BASTARD! HAVEN'T YOU LEARNT TO KNOCK!
MOTOKO: Raising her katana: URASHIMA, YOU…!
KITSUNE: Jesting: Oh! Keitaro's been a naughty boy again, eh?
-As Keitaro is beaten up by the three girls, Su jumps happily around, while Rhanar freezes on the spot as paralysed-
RHANAR: Coming to his senses, yelling: STOP THIS CHILDISH NONSENSE! LET THAT POOR BOY EXPLAIN HIMSELF!
-The girls stares at Rhanar for a moment, then pulls Keitaro up-
RHANAR: Completely shocked: What in Illirian's name was that about?
NARU: Nervously/angrily looking at Rhanar: Well, to you it may seem strange, but this bastard can take it; he always either steals our panties, bras, or watches us bathing or undressing! He's a perverted, little…!
MOTOKO: Finishing Naru's sentence: …Weakling who deserves to be punished!
Keitaro: Angry/yelling: THEN WHY DID YOU HAVE TO LAUGH SO LOUDLY!
IT SOUNDED LIKE YOU WERE BEING...
-Before Keitaro can finish his sentence, Su knocks him unconscious with a flying kick-
SU: Smiling/showing the 'Peace' sign: Girls: 1! Perv: 0!
RHANAR: Dropping his WraithBlade into the pool in shock: You girls are either the craziest or most humours women I have ever met…!
KITSUNE: Blinking/smiling: Well, if you wanna live here, you'd better get used to it!
RHANAR: Still quiet shocked: I…see…
MOTOKO: Looking at Rhanar: Where should he live? We do not have any more rooms, and besides; what would Hakura say?
Naru: Thinking: Well, we'd better figure something out…
SU: interrupting: Hey, girls, shouldn't we get something to eat? I'm STAR-R-R-RVING!
-As the girls leaves for the showers, Rhanar picks up Keitaro's unconscious body-
RHANAR: Still quiet shocked: Ermm, my ladies; what am I to do with this young man?
Naru: Smiling: Put him in his room; upstairs, room 204; once he wakes up, we'll get him something to eat.
-After placing Keitaro in his bed, Rhanar returns to the showers-
RHANAR: leaning to the wall: Girls, if you kick that poor lad unconscious each time you see him looking at you, than how come you did not knock me down?
KITSUNE: Laughing from the showers: Well, I think it's because you don't get horny as soon as you see us naked, Rhanar!
NARU: Uncomfortable: Keitaro's a rather…'special' case; at least you think of other then seeing us naked.
MOTOKO: Laughing, like Kitsune: You are both honest and strong, but not the most courageous I have fought!
RHANAR: Deeply sarcastic: Oh, thanks a lot, Motoko…!
NARU: Speaking to Su: How about you, Su? Didn't you want to kick Rhanar?
SU: grinning: heh heh, no; he's funny; especially when he starts running like a chicken!
-Outside the showers, the girls hear clear swearing, although not in a language they understand-
RHANAR: Getting impatient: Are you soon finished?
NARU: Yelling: ALMOST!
KITSUNE: Laughing from the showers: Oh, don't be such a killjoy, Rhanar; I bet you deep down inside want to have a better look at our goodies...
NARU: Yelling: KITSUNE!
KITSUNE: Laughing: What! I was just…hey! Stop that, Naru!
-Inside the showers, a large 'SPLASH!' is heard-
KITSUNE: Laughing: Oh, now you're gonna get it, Naru!
-Motoko and Su comes running out from the showers, each grabbing a towel and beginning to wipe themselves-
RHANAR: pounding his head into the wall: Of all...'BANG!'… the universes…'BANG!'…I could have…'BANG!'…been teleported to 'BANG!' and then…'BANG!'…I end up here!
MOTOKO: Sarcastic/laughing: Yeah, fate is cruel, isn't it?
-As Rhanar pounds his head into the wall, he hears screams, laughing and giggling from inside the showers-
NARU: Giggling, Kitsune tickling her: 'GIGGLE'…OK, OK, KITSUNE; hi hi hi! 'GIGGLE'…I…I surrender!
-A few seconds later, Naru and Kitsune comes out of the showers, both grabbing a towel, laughing-
KITSUNE: Smiling/blinking: I gotcha there, Naru!
NARU: Giggling: Just you wait!
RHANAR: Smiling: After all, you girls might not be that strange after all; you are just teenagers!
MOTOKO: Smiling: And you're not so bad after all, either.
SU: grinning: heh heh, Rhanar's cool, girls; I say we keep him as our pet!
RHANAR: Shocked: WHAT! Oh, nevermind…
KITSUNE: Smiling/blinking: Shouldn't we get going? I need something to eat after this!
SU: Laughing: I want bananas!
RHANAR: Thinking: Hmm, I could do with a good, warm meal…
KITSUNE: Smiling at Rhanar: I could think of something else you'd like, Rhanar…
NARU: Looking at Kitsune with a gaze that could splinter a mountain:
Would you stop that!
CHAPTER 2: WELCOME TO HINATA HOUSE!
-After a short bath and dressing up, the girls and Rhanar leaves the pool for the dinning room-
SU: Jumping around: I hope Shinobu's made something good!
RHANAR: Talking to Naru: I do not hope I gave you a bad first impression, my lady.
NARU: Smilling: Nah, it's OK; as long as you do not do it again.
KITSUNE: Smiling/blinking: I wouldn't be so sure, Naru; I'll bet he'll take a look as soon as he can!
RHANAR: Turning around, facing Kitsune, rather angry: I have no intention of looking at you bathing; if you think it get foolish thoughts just because of that, then you do not know me well, woman!
KITSUNE: Laughing: Well, who can blame me; you just 'fell' in! Got that! 'Fell' in?
RHANAR: Smiling: Although I cannot say you are so funny, you amuse me, Kitsune.
KITSUNE: Smiling/showing the 'Peace' sign: Heh heh, Thanks!
-As the girls and Rhanar enters the dinning room, a small, black-haired girl steps in front of them, bidding them welcome -
SHINOBU: Spotting Rhanar amongst the girls Who…who are you, sir?
RHANAR: Speaking to Motoko: Should I show her?
MOTOKO: Sarcastic: Oh, what a grand idea! We'll risk not getting anything to eat, Rhanar; you'll scare her to death!
RHANAR: Stepping in front of Shinobu: Girl, are you courageous?
SHINOBU: Uncertain Umm, I'm not sure; what do you mean, sir?
RHANAR: Kneeling before Shinobu: If you are, I will show you my face.
SHINOBU: Readying herself Then I'm ready! Show me!
RHANAR: Taking of his hood, looking into Shinobu's eyes: This is my face.
-After a long silence, Shinobu falls to the floor, unconscious-
NARU: Sarcastic/angry: Oh, great, thanks a lot, Rhanar; now we'll get nothing to eat!
RHANAR: Angrily looking at Naru: Food is the least important thing right now! Let me handle this!
-Rhanar kneels over Shinobu's unconscious body, his back blocking the view of the other girls-
KITSUNE: Whispering: There goes her virginity!
MOTOKO: Angry: Shut up, Kitsune!
SU: Worried: Will Shinobu be OK? Is she dead!
RHANAR: Raising up, turning to face the girls, smiling: One…two…three…:
-Just as soon as Rhanar's lips closes after saying three, Shinobu sit straight up-
Shinobu: Looking at Rhanar You woke me up; who are you?
RHANAR: Bowing/kneeling before Shinobu: I am Rhanar Narra-Jar, and I mean you no harm, little girl.
Shinobu: Looking at Rhanar I'm no 'little girl'; I'm Shinobu!
RHANAR: Raising up, walking towards Shinobu, smiling: I see, but let me get you up from there.
-As Rhanar helps Shinobu up, the other girls stands as paralysed-
KITSUNE: Muttering: He…he just 'touched' her, and then she woke up!
NARU: Glaring at Rhanar: Tell me something I don't know!
Shinobu: Looking a long time at Rhanar, then smiling OK! Dinner's served!
SU: Jumping onto Shinobu's back: SHINOBU! YOU'RE OK!
Shinobu: Giggling, Su tickling her: Hi hi hi, n…no, Su! It tickles!
KITSUNE: Sitting down at the table: C'mon, I'm starving!
-As everyone sits down, Rhanar looks around the table-
RHANAR: Looking around, impressed: Have you really made all this, Shinobu?
SHINOBU: Nervously looking at Rhanar Umm, yes…
RHANAR: Clearly impressed: I have never seen anything like this; you really have a talent for cooking!
SHINOBU: Giggling/smiling Hi hi, thanks, Rhanar!
-During dinner, Keitaro appears in the door, bandages on his head-
KEITARO: Nervous: Umm, is it safe to have some food?
-The girls share looks, nodding-
NARU: Looking at Keitaro: OK then; come in!
KEITARO: Nervous: Oh, thanks! Damn, I'm starving!
-After a while, Keitaro notices Rhanar's dark figure near Motoko-
KEITARO: Waving at Rhanar: Hey, who are you?
RHANAR: Lifting his head, his hood falling down his neck: I am Rhanar.
KEITARO: Bolting up from his chair, terrified: What the Hell are you! Some kinda freak!
RHANAR: Angrily looking at Keitaro: It is not gentle to call people names, kid; sit down and eat, and then I shall tell you!
KITSUNE: Joking: Get your pillows, this is gonna take quiet awhile.
-As Keitaro sits down, shaking badly in fear, Shinobu walks out to the kitchen to prepeare the dessert with Su-
RHANAR: Speaking calmly to Keitaro: Now, I want you to understand this: I am 'not' a cold-blooded, murderous creature with an insane mind and an urge to kill everything in my path. Secondly, I may look like a demonic creature from Hell in your eyes, boy, but as these women say well for me, I think you will respect their judgement.
KEITARO: Smiling/Nervously laughing: Umm, he he…well, I guess I were judging you too quickly, mr…?
RHANAR: Correcting Keitaro: Rhanar. Rhanar Narra-Jar, good sir.
KEITARO: Thinking/nervously looking at Rhanar: Oh, yes sir. Hmmmm…well, I think you can stay for a while…
MOTOKO: Speaking angrily to Keitaro: I'd not have it any other way, Urashima!
KITSUNE: Joking: Sounds like Motoko's got a new boyfriend, girls!
-As soon as Kitsune has spoken, chaos erupts in the dinning room; Motoko chases a laughing Kitsune around the table, swinging her katana and sending Ki shockwaves after her, reducing the wooden floors to broken planks-
RHANAR: Exchanging looks with Keitaro: Does this happen often, Keitaro?
KEITARO: Sighing: All, the time; last week, Su bombarded the girls in the pool with her missiles because Kitsune had complained that things around the house was getting boring.
RHANAR: laughing: I think I am beginning to like this place; it is even more exciting then leading my troops to war!
-All activity in the room stops, everyone looking at Rhanar-
RHANAR: Looking around, not comfortable with 'that' kind of attention: What? Oh, I think I should have told you; I am the general of my mother's army. I have fought many wars, but all the mass slaughter got really boring, but to see you girls fight for fun really warms my heart!
MOTOKO: Starring at Rhanar in shock: Are you a warlord!
RHANAR: Smiling: Actually not, dear Motoko; I only kill when I know that my opponent deserves it, or if it is in the name of my empire.
KITSUNE: Laughing: All right! That's it with all that warrior-crap! Bottoms up, Rhanar!
-Kitsune leaps onto Rhanar's chest, knocking him down, his heavy breastplate hitting the floor with a loud 'CLANG!'-
KITSUNE: Pouring sake into Rhanar's open mouth: UP YOU GO!
NARU: Trying to force Kitsune away from Rhanar: NO, Kitsune; you'll kill him if he gets too much!
RHANAR: Coughing, spitting sake out of his mouth: Argh! Are you insane, women! What is this; some kind of poison?
KITSUNE: Laughing: Just you wait!
-Rhanar, having swallowed a good deal of sake, starts making a fake feeling of disposition-
RHANAR: Rolling on the floor, faking a cramp, then falls unconscious: I do not…feel so…good…urgh!
MOTOKO: Yelling in shock: ARGH! KITSUNE! YOU JUST KILLED HIM WITH YOUR DAMNED SAKE!
KITSUNE: Leaning over Rhanar, shocked: I…I didn't mean to; it was just for fun!
RHANAR: Opening his eyes and jumping up from the floor, performing a series of unknown martial arts locking Kitsune's arms on her back: Next time, Kitsune, please 'ask' me if I want any alcohol, alright?
KITSUNE: Laughing/trying to get of Rhanar's iron grip: He he, su…sure thing Rhanar; but…would you please release me now!
RHANAR: Speaking to Naru: Should I release this crazy, yet charming girl, my lady?
NARU: Smiling evilly to Kitsune: No, let's give her some of her own medicine!
-Before anything can happen, Shinobu and Su returns from the kitchen with the desert-
SHINOBU: Smiling On Su's recommendation, today's dessert is Banana Split!
SU: Jumping happily to the table with her banana split: YEAH! BANANAS!
RHANAR: Releasing his grip on Kitsune's arms in a matter of seconds, finding his manners: It looks delicious, dear Shinobu!
SHINOBU: Sitting down at the table, looking worried at Kitsune Are you OK, Kitsune? You look like you just took a beating.
KITSUNE: Laughing/embarrassed: Me and Rhanar were just…erm…'arguing' a little, he he…
-As everybody starts eating, Motoko begins looking at Rhanar's sword-
MOTOKO: Curious: Rhanar, what kinda of sword is that?
RHANAR: Smiling proudly: I am glad you asked, Motoko; 'this' is the legendary WraithBlade, an ancient dark elven relic made by master craftsmen and smiths; some even say that it is completely indestructible.
MOTOKO: Deeply impressed: Wow; who gave you this awesome sword?
RHANAR: Smiling proudly: My mother gave it to me then day I joined her army; she told me that some of her warriors had found it in a crypt, and that they had barely escaped alive. They said that it was guarded by a powerful lich, a wizard who successfully has cheated death and has become immortal in payment of his flesh, blood and soul.
KITSUNE: Whistling, impressed: Wow, that's one Hell of a gift to your son on his first day in the army.
NARU: Unsure: But, how can you wield it? If it were guarded by an evil creature it must be cursed or something, right?
RHANAR: Smiling: Do not worry, my mother's best priestesses tested it for either unholy or demonic curses or magic; there were nothing to be found.
KEITARO: Curious: Besides being indestructible, can it do anything else?
RHANAR: Smiling: Yes, in fact it can; with the power of my thoughts, I can change what type of blade the sword should have; be it a scimitar, a broadsword or even a blade 2 feet long!
NARU: Impressed/evilly looking at Keitaro: Cool; then we knows who should defend us in case any robbers break in!
KEITARO: Insulted: Hey! I can fight, too!
RHANAR: Smiling, talking to Keitaro: Oh, excellent; I then suggest we take a duel after dinner, Keitaro. Motoko, where is the best place for fighting here? Expect, of course, the pool.
MOTOKO: Smiling: Hm hm, no wonder you haven't forgotten…OK; the best place might be the rooftop, that's where I train.
RHANAR: Smiling, talking to Motoko: Alright, after dinner on the rooftop; that is, if you girls do not mind?
-Motoko, Naru and Kitsune exchange evil looks, then nods-
NARU: Smiling evilly: Just don't carve him up in too many pieces; it would make one Hell of a mess!
KEITARO: Yelling in anger: Don't you even care if I die! Who is going to be in charge of the apartment!
KITSUNE: Thinking: Umm, girls; I think he's got a point there…
RHANAR: Smiling: Do not worry, my ladies; I suggest we use fists and feet; I doubt you can die of 'that'.
MOTOKO: Evilly chuckling: You'd be surprised to see how weak he is!
SU: Cheering: YEAH! CHICKEN FIGHT!
RHANAR: Trying to stay calm: Please, dear Su; stop calling me a chicken; you may not realise it but I dislike being called that…!
KITSUNE: Jesting: Oh yeah; we've got a fight coming already, girls!
SHINOBU: Nervously looking around Please don't fight now; you'll mess it all up! I already got to nail the planks back together again!
KEITARO: Addressing everyone: I agree with Shinobu; let's finish eating.
-As peace returns to the dinning room, Rhanar begins to notice that Shinobu and Su keeps sending each other warm looks-
RHANAR: Trying to forget about Shinobu and Su, speaking to Keitaro: How long have you lived here with these women, Keitaro?
KEITARO: Thinking: Hmmmm, I guess it'll be two years.
RHANAR: Looking around: Oh, I see. What does your parents think of you all living together here?
NARU: Smiling: My parents think it's good for me to be a little away from home, and this house it great!
SU: Smiling: I think this place is great, too; I 'knew' my sister was right when she told about, so I left right away!
MOTOKO: Speaking in a silent, dramatic voice: My parents thought that I needed some time away from my family; 'to master the sword is not enough', they said.
KITSUNE: Jesting: Yeah, that and the fact that you most likely blew their home asunder while training!
MOTOKO: Giving Kitsune a poisonous look: Kits-s-s-sune…!
SHINOBU: Nervous Umm, my parents were separated, but I decided to stay here; I feel some kind of freedom when I'm here…
RHANAR: Wondering: It seems like this house attracts you in some way…
well, anyway; you mentioned before that you do not have any rooms left; if it is OK with you I could always sleep here in the dinning room?
HAKURA: Stepping out of the shadows of the doorway to the dinning room: Well, maybe I can arrange something, sir.
NARU: Cheering: Hakura! We thought you were on holiday!
HAKURA: Stepping out of the shadows of the doorway to the dinning room: Yeah, I was, but it got kinda boring in the end; the same shops, stalls, wares…and not a damn Yen left…
KITSUNE: Giggling: Heh, now where I stand sometimes…
MOTOKO: Silently mumbling: always, you mean…
HAKURA: Lighting a cigarette: Well, who are you, sir?
RHANAR: Proudly responding: My name is Rhanar. Rhanar Narra-Jar.
HAKURA: Looking suspicious at Rhanar: Aha, and what, exactly, 'are' you?
RHANAR: Rather embarrassed: Oh, I must have forgotten to tell you all; my race is known as Dark Elves.
KITSUNE: Laughing: Either you have played too much Dungeons and Dragons, or else you're an addicted nerd! 'Dark Elves' doesn't exists!
RHANAR: Starting to anger: I would watch my tongue more carefully if I were you, Kitsune…!
MOTOKO: Impatient: Oh, c'mon girls; if he was some kinda fantasy 'thingie', would he be able to communicate with us? I doubt it.
SU: Laughing: I think he's real, and I can prove it!
RHANAR: Curious: How would you…oh my-ARRRH!
-Before Rhanar can react, Su has jumped up and kicked him in his stomach; despite his heavy breastplate, Rhanar still falls to the floor, panting-
RHANAR: Starting to anger: Somehow…'ah'…I…doubt that was necessary…'Aw!'
-As Rhanar stands up, holding his hand to the spot where Su hit, everyone seems to watch him-
RHANAR: Smiling, despite his pain: Well, if I were an imaginational creature, I would disappear now, right?
-As the silence continues, Rhanar begins to feel uneasy-
KEITARO: Completely confused: He…he is real…?
MOTOKO: Touching Rhanar's spiked shoulder pads, then his gloves:
He feels material, not like a demon…
RHANAR: Angry: Yes, I am real; just as real and living as you are! Now please tell me if you need more proofs; I will gladly drop myself from the rooftop next time; it sure beats this kick…!
-It takes almost a minute for the girls, Keitaro and Hakura to realise that Rhanar is real, resulting in a wave of questions-
NARU: Eager: Is it true that 'Dark Elves kills first, slaughters later and never takes prisoners!'
MOTOKO: Curious: How is your society built up? I hear the females rules almost everything!
SU: Eager: What do you eat? Is it yummy? Can I taste it?
KITSUNE: Curious/Jesting: Is it right that you sometimes take slaves after your wars?
KEITARO: Curious: Is it right that Dark Elves are considered by other elven races to be scum and abominations?
RHANAR: Furious, unwillingly unleashing a blast around him:
Be…SILE-E-E-ENT! One question at a time!
-As Rhanar looks around, he discovers that most of the girls seems to have been blasted across the room, while Su, Kitsune and Motoko are the only ones left standing up-
RHANAR: Catching an unfortunate look under Naru's skirt:
Oh, sorry my lady; let me help you up-oh, by Illirian…!
NARU: Punching Rhanar: You perverted BASTARD!
-Unlucky as she is, Naru's fist hits Rhanar's breastplate, making her fall on the floor in pain, Rhanar too-
RHANAR: Rolling on the floor, his hand over the spot where hit him:
ARGH! So much for Knighthood…!
NARU: Rolling in pain: OUCH! Shit, it hurts!
RHANAR: Finding a small vial in his belt: Here, trust me, it will help you.
-Rhanar pours a crimson liquid into Naru's open, bleeding wound, making it close and heal in a matter of seconds-
NARU: Smiling: Hey, it helped! Thanks, what was that?
RHANAR: Standing up: Dragon Blood, I always carry a good supply; it can cure as good as any wound.
SU: Nervous, hanging on a sharp piece of broken wood: Umm, someone wanna help me? I don't wanna hang here all day!
-As Rhanar and Kitsune begins to pull down the 'wounded' girls, Hakura seems to be wondering-
SHINOBU: Irritated Oh! This is the third shirt I've either burnt or destroyed today!
KITSUNE: Curious/Jesting: It's OK Shinobu; in fact, I think Rhanar'would be pleased if you took it of…!
RHANAR: Mumbling angrily, opening and closing his fists forcefully: Someone, hand me something really heavy, really fast…!
HAKURA: Wondering: Well, you don't seem to be so bad, and you really have manners…Well, I guess I can find a room for you, Rhanar.
-As everyone in the room cheers for the newcomer, other events, far away from the House, in an entirely other galaxy, threads are about to be crossed…with dire consequences-
CHAPTER 2: ALIENS?
-A week later, on a warm summer day, Rhanar is relaxing in the sun in front of the House, wondering as if the need to get home is that great-
KITSUNE: Walking towards Rhanar, drunk as usually: What's up, sleepyhead? Daydreaming of us, eh?
RHANAR: Mumbling tiredly: No, Kitsune, I am but laying here in the grass, enjoying on of Nature's greatest gifts…
KITSUNE: Not understanding: What?
RHANAR: Mumbling Sighing: The sun; the very life force of this planet; Shinris really are an amazing goddess…
KITSUNE: Not understanding: Shin-what?
RHANAR: Standing up, facing Kitsune angrily: Kitsune, Shinris is the goddess of Nature herself; in fact, you are walking on her just know.
KITSUNE: Jesting: Oh, 'now' I get it! Say; how about a lil' drink? Just the two of us; Motoko isn't lookin'…
RHANAR: Remembering his manners: No thank you, I prefer to be mentally stabile.
KITSUNE: Laughing: Aw, c'mon…!
RHANAR: Angered: NO.
KITSUNE: Charging Rhanar: OK, I tried being friendly; ALCOHOL ATTACK!
-Performing his material arts, Rhanar has no trouble overwhelming Kitsune, throwing her over his shoulder, carefully avoiding not to let her hit the shoulder spikes on his armour-
RHANAR: Silently laughing: Kitsune, do you not ever get tired of trying to get me drunk?
KITSUNE: Laughing from behind Rhanar: Nope, not ash long ash you're still hasn't experienced how good it feelsh!
-Sighing, Rhanar takes the not-resisting Kitsune to the pool, throwing her into the cold water-
KITSUNE: Shivering/Yelling/Laughing: OH MY GOSH! GEEZ, IT'S SO FREAKKIN', DAMN COLD!
RHANAR: Laughing: Oh, this will haunt my mind for weeks beyond!
SITH: Laughing/Applauding: That is, if you will still be around for so long.
RHANAR: Drawing the WarithBlade as quickly as always: If you are trying to assassinate me, you really need to work on keeping silent.
SITH: Nervous, a sword almost touching his throat: Oh, but that is not why I'm here; I simply came here to say…erm, hallo.
RHANAR: Turning to face this new character: And your name is…?
SITH: Introducing himself proudly: Sith, Demon Lord of Helvira.
RHANAR: Grinding his teeth: Please step into the light so I can see you, demon scum!
-Sighing, Sith steps into the light of the pool; a two meters tall, black-scaled snake on two humanoid legs, four arms, and wearing a large, black chestplate appears from the shadows-
RHANAR: Stepping back, for the first time in his life, in fear: His mere aura…Tanrisa help us…!
SITH: Annoyed/Sighing: Look, if I wanted to kill you, then you would already be laying on the ground in a pool of your own blood.
KITSUNE: Climbing out of the pool, yelling at Sith: You bashtard! Came here to think ye could just come and take advantage of a drunk girl, did ye!
GIRLS! PERV ALERT!
Sith: Angrily roaring: Would you please shut up, you imbecile slut! I'm not here to either kill you or…
-Cut of in his sentence by wild screams, Sith discovers a smaller horde of girls charging against him; a black-haired girl wielding a katana, a blond girl armed with a strange device that shots projectiles against him, and a brown-haired girl who seems rather angered-
MOTOKO: Readying her katana: Look Out, girls; this one looks quiet though!
SITH: Looking rather scared: W-what in the name of Helvira are these!
RHANAR: Smiling evilly: Your doom, demon!
-The resulting battle is fierce; Sith seems to be in possession of four, dark swords, which he uses extremely well; however, the combined efforts of Rhanar and the girls finally makes an opening in Sith's defense, Motoko using the advantage to knock Sith unconscious-
MOTOKO: Panting heavily, sheathing her katana: What the Hell was that!
RHANAR: Wondering: I do not know, but I think we would best find some way to keep it under control until we find out who sent it.
SU: Curiously poking Sith: He doesn't look edible; I say we toast him!
KITSUNE: Evilly looking at Sith: Yeah, let's make him a little 'hot'!
RHANAR: Angry: Cowards; you cannot kill an unconscious foe; let us get him inside.
-Although under harsh protests, the girls help Rhanar carry Sith into the dinning room, placing him on the table-
KITSUNE: Sarcastically speaking to Rhanar: What do we do now, 'Mr Merciful'?
RHANAR: Annoyed: We wait until he wakes up, then we interrogate him.
KITSUNE: Laughing: Then I know exactly how to do!
MOTOKO: Sighing: Kitsune, if you even 'think' of wearing that Dominatrix Costume of yours, I swear that I will destroy all alcohol in this house!
KITSUNE: Siting down again, disappointed: Oh, I'll never get it tried on!
RHANAR: Sighing: These are those kinds of days that I wish I had stayed in my bed…
-After almost two minutes of silence, Sith seems to be moving, Motoko and Rhanar readying their weapons-
RHANAR: Signalizing Su and Kitsune to grab Sith's arms: Three, two, one…!
-Just as Sith awakens, two crossed blades meets his throat-
SITH: Sighing/smilling evilly: Racial fools…!
-Suddenly unleashing a massive wave of Chaotic Energy, Sith steps over the unconscious girls' bodies, facing a rather angry Rhanar-
RHANAR: Holding the WraithBlade against Sith's throat: I warn you: I am trained in fighting demon scum like you!
SITH: Angrily knocking Rhanar's sword out of his hand: There is that racism again; when do you realise that I mean you no harm!
RHANAR: Raising his fists, ready for combat: Just as soon as you tell us what in Illirian's name you are doing here!
SITH: Sighing/Nodding: Alright; wake these girls and I'll tell you exactly why.
-As Rhanar begins waking the girls up, he finds that Kitsune proves to be impossible to wake-
SITH: Grapping Kitsune by her legs: Stand aside, I think I know what to do…
-As Sith starts shaking the drunk Kitsune rather hard, Motoko notices her friend is hanging with her head down, a demon holding her-
MOTOKO: Charging against Sith: PERVERTED DEMON! DIE!
RHANAR: Blocking Motoko's sword with the WraithBlade: WAIT! Motoko, he is but 'helping' her; she seems to be more drunk then we thought.
MOTOKO: Furiously yelling at Rhanar: Are you insane, Rhanar! You leave Kitsune's life in the hands of a demon!
-Rhanar and Motoko's arguing seems to have attracted Shinobu and Keitaro, who storms into the room, Keitaro armed with a broom, and Shinobu with a frying pan-
KEITARO: Ready for battle: What's wrong? Have Su built a new Robot of Mass Destruction!
SHINOBU: Dropping her frying pan/Screaming at the sight of Sith EEEK! A demon! Run for your lives!
SITH: Using his two lower hands to block his ears/Dropping Kitsune: OUCH! Make that imbecile bagpipe stop shouting!
MOTOKO: Slamming her hand over Shinobu's mouth, shutting her up: You're lucky Rhanar said good for you; else I'd carve you up for calling her that!
KITSUNE: Rather offended by being dropped: Ouch! Hey; be careful how you handle a girl, scale-face!