A/N: This is based on true event but I can not promise that all the facts are accurate. If anyone gets confused by the last sentence is a continuation of the sentence at the end of the first part (hopefully that makes sense).

Fate Maybe?

Alex screamed and shut her eyes to shield herself from visions of water the struggling people fighting for their way up to the top of the ship so that they might at least have some chance for survival. She didn't want to watch it.

"Why are they keeping those people down there daddy?" Alex asked seeing no sense in the confusion and panic displayed on the TV in front of her.

"Well," her father started, "when the Titanic went down they tried to keep all the Irish and other people without much money down in the lower levels," explaining it in a ways that she would understand.

"Why would they want the Irish to die daddy? Aren't we Irish?"

"Yes, we are honey, but these Irish didn't have much money," he explained delicately, rubbing Alex's back.

"I'm glad we weren't on that boat," Alex stated.

"Yeah, me too, but ya' know what?" her father asked, adding to the conversation.

"Hmm?" she asked, turning her attention back to the film.

"One of your great, great grandmothers almost rode on the Titanic..." (A/N: This connects to the last sentence.)

April 1, 1911

I ran down to the docks as the tears ran down my face. I would be leaving my friends, and family behind, but hopefully there would find a better life waiting for me when I reached America.

Scanning my eyes over the sea of green rolling hills with large boulders scattered randomly on each of the hillsides. The trees blew lightly in the breeze. The air I breathed smelled of sea air. I let out another sob as my friends continued to wave goodbye.

I could see in their eyes that they were jealous of that my family had managed to get a rare ticket for me. I knew that in their place I would too; the famine was bad here, but no one had heard of any food shortage in America. I didn't let it get to me too much thought because underneath the envy in their eyes I could see that they were happy for me. Allowing one more sob before turning back towards the people heading for the docks.

This couldn't be happening to me. Not to me.

I was always the girl who was teased for being unlucky. There were consent things staining my clothes, my meals tended to be the one with the a large fly in the middle that no one realized was in there until it was already in my mouth. I was the one who was always getting blamed for pranks that I never even knew had taken place until I was the one beaten for them.

I was by no means lucky.

One thing I was more curious about then anything else at the moment was, if I wasn't lucky then how did I get this ticket?

In a matter of minutes I was able to see the ship, above all the buildings; moments after that I was pushed into a crowd of screaming, over excited people. Dust flew up into the air as everyone began to push their way towards the dock. I went up on my toes to see above the huge mass of heads, moving around before me, I could barely see men standing in expensive blue uniforms on the ramps where they were loading.

Suddenly I was knocked back down to my feet as two young boys, probably about ages ten and eight, as they ran past playing a game of chase. I laughed and continued making my way towards the loading docks.

I quickly found myself trying to push through the crowds towards the loading docks, but it seemed useless, since basically every other person who had a ticket and many other people didn't but were trying to sneak on anyway. After a while of struggling against everyone else I found myself just standing in one place and letting the crowd push me whichever way and actually ended up being one of the first of the Irish to load the boat.

The first thing I did after I stepped onto the deck was take a deep breath.

When I had first imagined the fragrance of this great "unsinkable ship" to be something unimaginable; a smell better than any flower you could pick off the side of the beautiful hills of Ireland. I thought it would be something heavenly, but it wasn't.

The smell of the fresh paint filled my nostrils making me cough out. A man came up behind me and touched my shoulder.

"Are you okay Miss?" he asked me.

"Yes, thank you," I replied, smiling.

The man returned the smile then walked away to help a woman with three children grab some of her bags.

I took another breath, through my mouth this time, but even without my sense of smell I could still taste th rancid smell on my tongue.

"Its fine, you'll get over it," I told myself, trying to be reasonable, but every time I took another breath that awful smell lingered in my nose, and itching my throat.

I walked inside and took a few flights of stairs down to the level I my room was in.

Slowly, I pushed open the door and found that I was the first person in the room, so I got to pick the bed I wanted.

To my relief, to rooms only smelled faintly, of the paint, but anywhere else I went the smell was nauseating. I didn't know what to do. There was no way I could spent the whole remainder of the trip locked up in my room, but I couldn't leave behind such a great opportunity simply because the paint smelled bad, but I didn't want to be sick the whole way over either.

After a little bit of thought I decided I'd be staying.

I only spent a few minutes getting my things set in place in the room before I decided to explore. The hallways were all lighted and the walls whitewashed, there was nothing on them, but I had heard that in the first class hallways they had magnificent paintings and detailed wallpaper decorating the whole length of the corridors. The rooms were said to be even greater. They were supposed to have comfortable chairs, couches and beds, which were decorated nicer than the halls. I had no idea if what rumors were true or not and I never would because a third class Irish woman would never be invited into first class accommodations.

I decided not to continue down the corridors any longer since they would all look the same. Instead, I made my way back up to the deck.

I thought that maybe coming back out here again wouldn't be as worse as the first time but as soon as the stench of the fresh pain filled my nostrils again I felt a strong urge to throw up; for once I was actually thankful that because of the famine in Ireland because there was nothing in my stomach to come back up.

I took a few more breaths, trying to calm my senses, but once again I forgot about the sickening smell. Before I knew it I had fallen to the ground and was breathing hard.

I needed to get off. I couldn't go any further. This was hell.

As soon as my head was cleared again I slowly stood back up and walked down to the lower levels to grab my bag so that I could leave as soon as possible. I couldn't believe that I was doing this, it seemed so selfish, but a little voice in the back of my head said everything would be all right; that for some reason I was making the right choice.

I scanned the room, once more time, so to memorize every aspect of the room so that I would at least be able to go back with some details of what I'd seen.

I wasn't really sure what happened after that. My mind was filled with racing thoughts of what I was doing, about how stupid this was, but I didn't care. Once again, I stepped onto the deck and felt bile rise up in my throat. I instantly began to walk faster.

Once I deboarded I broke down and started crying. How could I make such a reckless discussion? I had given up such a great chance for a better life, for such a pointless little reason.

What would everyone else at home think?

I didn't even want to think about that.

In my state it took me an extremely long time to walk back, and when I finally did reach home everyone just looked up from their work, or whatever they had been doing, and stared up at me.

My mother came out first screaming and crying at me, but it was not from disappointment or anger. She was crying because of happiness; because she was happy to have me here, at home.

I smiled at her and said, "I did get on, but I didn't stay on. I got sick."

"…But she didn't."

Please tell me what you thought. I've never written anything like this so I'd really like to hear what you thought I did good and what you didn't like about it. Even if you hated it, please, take the time to review.

Alexa