Fan Fiction vs. Real Life

I was sitting on the bus, thinking about . . . nothing . . . when this distinction occurred to me between fanfic boys, and real boys, and strangely out of it spawned this odd dialogue between Ash and Misty, and thus . . . well . . . this.

A collection (hopefully) of drabbles based on the distinction between fanfics and real life, starting with the above. I can't guarantee that there will be updates or anything like that, but this first one should amuse you. It will depend on whether or not inspiration strikes. Although, if anyone comes up with an amusing distinction, let me know and if it inspires me, it will be done.

DISCLAIMER: I don't own Pokemon.

Fan Fiction vs. Real Life: REAL Boys

Fan fiction vs. Real life #1:

In fan fiction, boys won't say 'I love you' unless they really mean it.

In real life, boys will say they're in love with your dog if that's the ticket into your pants . . . I mean heart.

"You know, pikachus are my favourite Pokémon," Misty said suddenly, causing the two boys to glance at her in surprise. She gave a quick squeeze of the Pokémon in her arms as though to somehow prove her adoration of its species as a whole, and then turned her eyes in a meaningful way on the younger of the two boys. "They're just so adorable and brave and strong."

"Are you sure, Misty?" Brock asked skeptically, his eyes narrowed in confusion. "I thought you liked tentacruel best."

"Nope, pikachus are the best," she reiterated. "Don't you think so, Ash?" she asked hopefully, smiling prettily at the younger boy.

He shrugged noncommittally at her comment, and thought it best to simply ignore the look that he would never have the prowess to understand. "I guess they're ok," he replied. "I mean, I like my pikachu, but I wouldn't say they're the be all and end all of all Pokémon."

"Aren't pikachus your favourite, too?" she asked him, her face dropping a little.

"No way," he replied. "Just 'cos I've got a pikachu doesn't mean they're my favourite. Pikachu is my favourite, but not pikachus generally. Not even close. I mean, if someone came up to me and told me they had a Pokéball with my favourite Pokémon in it, I think I'd be kinda disappointed if it was a pikachu.

"Unless it was a girl pikachu," he added as an afterthought. "Although I'd still be really disappointed, but if it was a girl pikachu then we could breed them and I could trade the pichus for something really awesome, or I could give them to Brock and he'd be able to use them to pick up chicks."

"That's an excellent idea!" Brock cheered, jumping to his feet. "Pikachu, come with me," he demanded as he snatched the electric mouse from Misty's grasp. "We're gonna go scouting for hot chicks."

"What is your favourite, then?" she asked him, genuinely curious about the answer. She quickly recovered, however, continuing along with the plan. "I mean, 'cos I bet that's my favourite to."

"Really, Myst?" he asked her, half of him excited about the shared interest, but the other half still a little skeptical. "Even if it was a fire type?"

"Hey," she cried indignantly, "I like fire Pokémon."

"Name one?" Ash countered.

"Well, I like Gyarados and he knows flame thrower," she argued smugly, crossing her arms over her chest.

Ash scoffed, but smiled all the same. "That's 'cos he's part dragon type, Misty. I mean a real one, like moltress or magma."

"Well, I helped that time with Charmander, didn't I?" she asked, looking proud in her response.

"Yeah, but that's only 'cos you're a good person," he responded.

"That doesn't change . . ." she began to argue, but trailed off as his words sunk in for her. "Ash, do you really think I'm a good person?" she asked him quietly, her whole demeanour becoming suddenly shy.

"Well, yeah, I guess," he answered awkwardly, scratching the back of his neck. "I mean, of course I do, Misty," he said a bit more certainly, realizing that he had finally said something right around her. "You're always helping people out and stuff. And you've saved my butt a bunch of times and done lots of selfless things like that. I've always thought you were a good person, Misty."

She beamed at his words, her face lighting with a happy smile. "Oh, Ash . . ." she cooed gently.

"And, Misty . . . my favourite Pokémon," he said quickly, while he still had his nerve up, "you don't have to worry 'cos it's not a fire or bug-type or anything gross like that."

He stood up, sending her a sweet, lopsided grin that sent her heart racing with anticipation. As those chocolate eyes met her own, she felt as though she was the centre of the entire universe and couldn't think of anything better than this.

He said only two words before disappearing in a fluster of blushes and excuses.

"It's tentacruel."

~FIN~