Did it hurt?
Did the sight of his mouth on mine send you crashing into despair? Did the thought of me moving on tear you to shreds? Did the twist of my smile remind you of the twist of a knife in your heart?
Did you see?
Did you see us sitting on the roof, the place you assumed belonged to only you and I? Our flesh? Did you see our flesh coming together? Our hands, our lips, and so much more? He can touch me like you never could, he can love me like you never could.
Did you know?
Did you know I trust him? That I would willingly place my life in his hands? How does it feel, knowing I never did the same for you? That I always second guessed you, that I always held you at arms length because I knew you would end up hurting me?
I was right, wasn't I? I was so right. I was right and for once, just once, I wished I wasn't. You-a blonde-lipstick stains-perfume... I wanted to be wrong so very badly.
I always knew. Even when you tried your very best to sneak around, even when you showered before you saw me, I always knew. You thought you had me fooled, but, as it turns out, I was the one doing the fooling, wasn't I sugar?
Did you cry?
Did you cry like I cried when you didn't show up at night? When you went out to drink and fuck and dirty your soul even more? When you knew I wasn't coming back, that you'd really lost me for good?
Did you hide?
Were the knowing stares of everyone else too much for you? Was the embarrassment of having an unfaithful girlfriend too much to face? It's terrible isn't it? The shame? The shame of having the one you love slip from your grasp and into the grasp of another?
"How could you do this to me, chere?"
Did you laugh?
Did you laugh like I'm laughing now when I asked you the same thing over and over again? When my heart was breaking and I couldn't stop weeping and I wanted to understand how you could claim you loved me but hurt me so badly at the same time?
I walk away from you, I feel your hand on my wrist.
Did it feel good?
Did the sensation of my flesh send shivers down your spine? What was it like? To finally touch the skin you've been yearning for and dreaming of for so long?
Did you remember?
Did you remember in that instant as my hand rips from yours and I walk away that it was over? That I belonged to another and I was happy and that I was finally enjoying life?
"I'm so sorry, I was so stupid! But I need you, I can't live without you." Your crimson eyes are dim with unshed tears. You look so pathetic. "Let's try one more time-"
Cause I did. I hurt. I saw. I knew. I cried. I hid. I laughed. I felt good. I remembered.
But the pain you caused me doesn't matter anymore. I'm filled with so much love I can't breathe and he's everything I've ever wanted and I don't need you anymore, Remy.
Did I ever need you?
Blame aiRo25.