5 Ways Gibbs Goes to Get his Coffee
Rating: K+, for mild language
Spoilers: None
Summary: His team can always tell how long it will take for Gibbs to get his coffee by the way he acts. Or by the way Tony behaves. One-shot.
A/N: Aspired by writing one of my other fanfics, but don't worry, you don't need to read it to understand this. It's a one-shot. Just a little humour to brighten your day.
Each way is its own separate thing. None of them are connected unless you choose them to.
1: The Low-On-Caffeine Boss
It is bright and early in the morning. His team was all there before Gibbs was. Something that usually doesn't happen. There was no call yet about a case. Crime has not decided to act today. Yet that is. His team, including Abby, was all around Tony's desk, gossiping about work, relationships, friends, and movies. There was a laugh heard from the table. Something was funny, or just that stupid to laugh about.
Gibbs entered the bull pen. "Morning boss," Tony said in between laughs. Ziva and McGee gave their boss a quick glance before continuing their conversation. Gibbs sat down at his desk. Today was one of those days where you had no time to do anything. Gibbs had to miss his regular cup of coffee this morning just because he had to get to work on time. He didn't want his co-workers to gossip why he ran late. Of course, he has to have coffee in the morning to stay awake, but also to ignore his team gossip. Gibbs tried not to seem like he needed coffee for a bit. There was only one way to get rid of that focus.
Trying to work the computer. For him, learning how to use a computer is like if humans figured out how to live on Mars. He turned on the power button of the machine. As he waited, he put on his reading glasses. This may be his moment of success. Once it loaded, he had to log on. Gibbs threw his glasses off his face. It's too early in the morning without a coffee.
The boss not caring what people think, he left the bull pen to the elevator. "Why did leave five minutes later after he got here?" Abby said curiously.
Tony questioned, "There is always one thing he's carrying every morning that he wasn't carrying today. What is it?" Abby raised her hand. It was an easy solution. "Yes Abs?"
"Coffee!" The team laughed.
"Just to think, the boss was going on his computer without coffee. He can't even handle going on his computer with coffee." Tony grinned. Everyone started to laugh again. "He'll be back soon."
2: The Man-On-A-Mission Boss
It was the middle of the afternoon. Tony, Ziva, McGee, and Gibbs got a case dealing with a drug dealer. Tony was looking up stuff about the victim, Jessica Wong. While Tony was doing that, Ziva was on a phone call with the place she worked with, and McGee was looking up things on the drug dealer. Gibbs was at his desk watching his team work. Like he was waiting for something to happen. Just how a tiger is watching his prey, waiting to pounce on it. "How's it going McGangster? Find anything about the drug dealer?" Tony asked Timothy.
"Actually, I did. I found out where he deals. What did you find exactly?" McGee challenged.
Tony stuttered, "I found um. I found that-" Suddenly, Gibbs phone rang. He picked it up.
"Gibbs," the boss answered. Tony was anxiously typing on his keyboard. He has to come back from McGee. His reputation needed to stand tall. No one like Tony, or Tony himself, wanted to lose against McGee when he thought he outsmarted the man.
"I found out why someone wanted to kill her. Someone like the drug dealer," DiNozzo answered proudly. In the background, Tony heard a "thanks, I'll be there" from the boss. Apparently, the boss did not hear what Tony said happily because he headed towards the elevator. "Boss, I know why someone would want to kill Jessica Wong!" It was too late. Gibbs was in the elevator, and was heading down. He had no chance to hear Tony now.
"I guess the boss doesn't believe you either," McGee answered. It looked like Tim is going to win this time.
Tony corrected, "Actually McGee, the boss needs to go on a coffee break. But he won't be back in a bit. Someone called the boss and told him to meet the mysterious caller somewhere. So, it looks like I win."
"Prove you actually found out why." Tony couldn't. He gave up in defeat, letting the Probie win this time. Also, luckily Gibbs wasn't there to hear Tony's embarrassing moment.
3: The Angry (at Tony) Boss
There was no case today. It was the team's catch up day. Catch up as in paperwork. They recently closed a case about a missing child. The director let another team take the case, knowing that Gibbs always hated those cases. Tony was writing something on a piece of paper. At first glance, Gibbs guessed he was doing paperwork. He was wrong. Tony made the sheet into a paper airplane, and flew it into Ziva's garbage. Ziva looked at Tony, but ignored him. He then grabbed another sheet of paper, and did the same thing again. Gibbs looked up at his senior field agent. The boss couldn't concentrate when the person sitting diagonally from him was throwing paper airplanes.
"Tony. Stop please," Ziva said with a hint of anger in her voice. Gibbs agreed on Ziva this time. Again, Tony made a paper airplane, and threw it into Ziva's garbage. "Tony. Please?" He looked up at her and nodded. Finally. Gibbs went back to doing his paperwork.
Five minutes later, Tony threw another paper airplane. But into McGee's garbage this time. McGee didn't notice because he was listening to music, but it caught Gibbs eyes. From all the years of Gibbs being a sniper, he learned how to spot movement. Especially the ones that weren't suppose to happen. No one complaining at DiNozzo, he made another one, and another one, and another one. This made Gibbs question why he made Tony his senior field agent or how he lasted this long at his job.
Finally, the boss had enough with Anthony's behaviour. He got up, and walked to the elevator madly. Gibbs pressed the elevator door button forcefully. It opened, and Gibbs went down.
"See Tony, even Gibbs did not like you throwing your paper planes," Ziva told. This was an easy message for Tony to translate. Stop throwing your planes, or else get the coffee I'm getting now thrown at you. Thinking of that message, Tony stopped making the planes and got to work. He would have thrown another plane if he knew his boss would take a long time to get a coffee. This was just a short break.
4: The I-Don't-Care (or bored) Boss
Day after day, the team hasn't got called for a case. So, the boss ordered everyone to do paperwork. Not the most exciting thing in the world, but there was worst things out there. Just like this morning. He just got a new coffee, but it wasn't hot when he got it. Gibbs didn't feel like waiting for a new hot coffee, so he accepted the warm coffee. A good way to start the day. He drank half of his coffee, then threw the rest away.
His team was peaceful for one of the few times they actually did. There was no one distracting the leader with paper airplanes, no phone calls, or even gossiping between the team members. This felt weird for Gibbs, making it feel like olden days when he was the Probie.
Suddenly, Gibbs grabbed his jacket from the floor and stood up. Tony watched as Gibbs walked to the elevator. "Where are you going?" Tony asked. Tim and Ziva looked up.
"Coffee," the boss simply said. No explanation was needed more than that. The boss was already gone. Anthony pulled out his phone as soon as Gibbs wasn't in sight. Music was playing quietly as he did some stuff on his phone.
Ziva said, "Why did he just go get coffee? There was no reason he needed some. He just got one an hour ago. I even saw him throw out half of one."
"The boss didn't seem to enjoy his coffee also," McGee observed. Tony was smiling evilly. "Tony, what did you do to the boss's coffee?"
"I may or may not have put some ice cubes in his coffee this morning," Tony stated. "Besides, the boss will be back soon. You don't want to get caught by the boss-man talking about how I added ice in."
"What happened to... Tim, what rule was that? The one with coffee in it?" Ziva questioned.
"Rule number 23: Never mess with a Marine's coffee if you want to live," Tim said.
The senior field agent ordered, "Alright. I get what you're trying to do. But the boss is happy because we didn't pull anything. Do you want to stay late tonight doing paperwork?" The music suddenly stopped, and Tony got back to work. The rest of the team followed.
5: The In Love Boss
Gibbs team had to work the night-shift tonight. The leader got a call about a case at 11 at night. The best time to commit murders criminals say. Sadly, Gibbs had to call or even wake up his team and tell them. At 1 o'clock in the morning, the team came back from the crime scene, and went to the bull pen. Luckily, this case wasn't a very challenging case. It was obvious who killed their navy officer. The team only had to prove it was him. As the team was explaining to the boss how their victim was killed and who did it, Gibbs got a phone call. He looked at the caller ID, and walked to the "private" area to talk. "McGee, stop talking. Boss-man is gone," Tony said. The probationary agent listened to Tony and stopped.
"Why'd Gibbs leave?" McGee asked.
Tony shrugged, "He didn't believe what you were saying was true." Tony looked at him. "I'm joking McGee. I think it was a very important call, and he needed to step out of the room." Ducky arrived in the bull pen.
"Hello Anthony, Ziva, and Timothy. Do you know where I might find Jethro by any chance?" Ducky questioned.
"Yes, Gibbs walked to the side of the stair to answer a phone call," Ziva explained. Gibbs entered the bull pen with a smile on his face. He went to his desk, and grabbed his coat.
"Jethro. There you are. I got the results of the dead-"
"Give them to DiNozzo. It's his case now. I need a coffee break," Gibbs said. He left the building in a rush.
"Wow. That's new. What type of boss was that? McGoof? Ziva?" Tony asked. Ducky put the folder he was carrying on Tony's desk.
The doctor answered, "That is Gibbs when he is in love. I haven't seen that face in a long time. Don't expect him back until the time he usually comes in the morning." Ducky walked over to the elevator. "I wonder who he's with this time? He looked like Tony does when he was with someone the night before," Ducky said to himself. He left the bull pen.
"I guess the boss-man's date is important. He's probably not even going for coffee anyways. But, I get lead of case, so it doesn't matter," Tony stated.
McGee informed Tony, "That was probably the reason he put you on lead. Because he didn't want you to snoop." Tony Gibbs-slapped McGee.
"Probably not."
"Or he wasn't thinking straight." Tony looked at his co-worker.
"Ziva?"
"This is not my problem. You decided to stick your head in the dirt," she told.
"It's sand Ziva. Stick your head in the sand. Not dirt. Anyways McGee, continue." Timothy continued from where Tony ordered him to stop talking. The team learned a new way on how Gibbs goes to get his coffee for the next time if there is ever a next time.
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