Feelings, Emotions, Fleeting Or Staying?
A/N
As last night's Casualty was so cute, I decided to write more Zax picking up immediately after their last scene finished.
Reviews would be lovely,
Laura xxx
"If only I had a magic wand, eh?" Zoe smiled at Max.
He smiled back at her, and then Zoe went to wheel Matilda to a private room.
To the consultant's surprise, Cal and Ethan weren't there.
"They'll be up in a sec, they're just having a slice of cake."
"Cake?" Zoe perked up.
"Yes, cake."
"Could you..?"
"Yes, I know how much you love chocolate cake, I'll keep an eye on the little one." Said the nurse.
Zoe made her way back down to the nurse's station in the ED.
Max was the only one left of the staff, the rest had dispersed.
"Any cake left?" Zoe asked hopefully.
"Yeah, here you are." Max pushed a plate with a pleasingly large slice of cake left on it towards her.
Zoe gratefully took the plate from him, and without further ado, began to eat the treat with relish.
"Someone's enjoying that." The porter observed with a chuckle.
"I am" The consultant confirmed, her mouth full of cake,
"Manners!" Said Max in a mock serious tone, then smiled. "I meant what I said today, you did really well with Matilda."
Zoe swallowed. "Thanks. She's a little sweetheart."
"She certainly is, Cal's lucky."
"He is." His wife said shortly, taking another bite of the cake to avoid saying anything else.
"Oh.. I'm sorry, I didn't mean to-" Max realised his mistake.
"It's fine." Said Zoe, licking her lips. "I'll have to ask Lily where she got this from-it's yummy."
"How did you know that she got it?"
"I know everything."
Max laughed. "I should've guessed."
Zoe looked at the clock. "It's hometime. D'you fancy going to the SCBU to say goodnight to Matilda?"
"That would be great, I didn't get a chance to hold her, what with everything that happened."
"I never realised that you were fond of babies." Said Zoe quietly.
"I do, but not the nappy changing bit." He said, making her laugh.
"Me neither!"
There was a silence, each were lost in their own thoughts.
Zoe was reflecting on the conversation that she and Max had had before Matilda was transferred upstairs- he'd called her addictive.
Max was thinking about how Zoe had been with Matilda. So tender, so caring- so maternal. The smile on her face when she realised that the baby girl was going to be okay had melted his heart.
"Max..."
"Zoe..."
Each spoke at once.
"Oh, er, you go first." Max said gently.
"Well, you know that you were flirting with me, before?"
"Yes..." Her husband said as they entered the lift.
"I can't have you doing that-we're back to where we were this time last year. Both of us hurting, trying to put our feelings to one side..." She explained.
"We're either friends, or we should perhaps try again. What I did..." A tear rolled down Zoe's cheek. "What I did hurts me too, and I don't want my heart to be played with, even if it is very gentle." She finished, dipping her head and closing her eyes to try and pull herself together.
Max sighed. "Then let's try again." He said gently.
"Really?" She looked at him.
He took both of her hands in his. "Yes... Zoe, when I saw you with Matilda, I realised something. It doesn't matter what happened in the past... I love you, so much. The way you smiled when you knew that she was improving... It melted my heart."
"I love you too." She smiled at him.
He squeezed her hand. "I want to grow old with you, I want to have a family with you, I want to love you... If you'll let me?"
"Of course I will. I want that too, Max." She responded, smiling at him.
The lift came to a stop and the two parted. "Finally!" Max said.
" It's a bit slow, the lift I mean. I'll speak to someone about it." Zoe said.
Max held out a hand. Zoe took it, smiling still.
Zoe asked a nurse where Matilda's room was, and they were directed to a small room at the end of a long corridor.
"It's very quiet" Zoe said to Max, she was used to the hustle and bustle of the ED.
"It's because it's sleep time for the little ones"
"Oh yeah." Zoe realised as they walked past a room full of babies in cots.
"Aww" the female cooed, wanting to go in, but she knew that she couldn't.
"One day, we'll have one of our own." Max said softly.
"Yes, hopefully."
Max knocked on the door of Matilda's room.
Caleb opened it. "I take it that you've come to check up on her?"
"Yes, and I'd like a cuddle with her, if that's okay?"
"Of course. Actually, if it's okay, Ethan's going to get something to eat, and I'm going to freshen up, so could you keep an eye on her for a while?"
"Of course, we'd love to." Zoe said happily.
Ethan was holding Matilda. "Could you hold Matilda, please Zoe? She's a bit grumpy, and she won't settle. I saw how you rocked her earlier- she definitely calmed."
"Of course, you go and get something to eat. Happy Birthday, by the way." The consultant said.
"Thank you." Ethan smiled, then slipped Matilda into Zoe's arms.
"Hello, little one. I hear that you're grumpy? Oh dear, well that's not good after the day you've had!" Zoe cooed.
Max exchanged a smile with Ethan and Caleb and then the brothers left.
For a while, Max simply watched Zoe, cooing and chatting to the baby girl in her arms as if it was the most natural thing on the world to her.
"You're such a natural with her" Max broke the comfortable silence which had descended upon the room, Zoe was bottle feeding Matilda.
"Thank you." Zoe smiled. "She's such a sweet little thing."
"She is, just like you."
"Aww" Zoe said, a smile on her face.
Max kissed her. "D'you want me to burp her? I wouldn't want your top to get messy, and it doesn't matter if I get stuff on mine."
Zoe nodded. "Matilda, this is Max. He's going to burp you, please don't be sick on him!"
"Hey little one" Max said, rocking Matilda gently and snuggling her against his shoulder. "You're a sweet little lady, aren't you? We're very taken with you." He informed her.
"We certainly are." Zoe agreed, a smile on her face- like her, Max was a ball of soppiness when it came to babies. *If she ever needs looking after, if Caleb and Ethan want a break, I'll be first in the queue."
"I will too. Zoe, can I come home with you afterwards?"
"Of course." Zoe smiled.
Max managed to get Matilda to burp, several times.
"D'you want to rock her to sleep? After all, she knows you better." Max asked his wife.
"Of course." Zoe said.
Max placed Matilda back into her arms.
"What do I do?" Zoe was unsure.
"Sing to her, and rock her gently."
Zoe began to rock Matilda slowly, and softly began to sing "Twinkle, Twinkle, Little Star" to her.
"That's it, you're doing well." Max encouraged.
Zoe stroked Matilda's cheek, and sang "Baa Baa, black sheep" to her.
The baby's eyes began to flutter, and she fell asleep.
"Night night, little one." Zoe whispered, and gave Matilda a kiss on the forehead.
She laid Matilda in her cot.
Max saw tears in Zoe's eyes, and pulled her close. "Don't be cry, Zo. I promise you, one day, we'll have our own baby, to sing to, to love. Our own child."
Zoe nodded. "I hope so."
"We will, sweetheart. We will."
The End