Angel's back. I'm still bruised from the last time, and I'm pretty sure he is too… god, I love that. He's smiling to himself, but I'm pretty sure it's not for me. Never is. Not that I care.
His smile fades as he walks over. His touch is cold, distant. Always smooth and calculated, no passion. This is business, not pleasure, after all. But I can tell he enjoys it.
Because I'm the only one who deserves it as much as he does. Because I'm the only one who will show him no mercy, no forgiveness, no kindness. And even if it's Buffy he's thinking of as he comes, I know he needs this as much as I need it.
I'm his to use, to abuse, as he is mine, but he wants more. I can see it in his eyes as his visage flicks back and forth between human and demon, trying not to bite down in the heat of the moment. One day, maybe, just maybe he'll give in … I wouldn't even scream.
…
Faith has that far away look in her eyes, like she's a thousand miles away. I wish I could go with her, to where ever her safe place is. But I can't, and I have to hurt her just to make her look at me.
She's been crying again, that's what she didn't want me to see. She thinks I don't notice, but she can't hide anything from me. Still flinches from my touch, even after all this time. I don't say anything, because there's nothing to say. I can't comfort her, can't make the pain go away. But then again she doesn't want to be comforted, and neither do I.
So we do what we do best. A blur of pain, lust, come, blood… she's punished for my crimes, and I for hers. But as much as I want it, I'll never give her what she really wants. Because she doesn't deserve it. And neither do I.