Not Again

June 25/03

Disclaimer: The Charmed characters do not belong to me. They are the creation of Constance Burge and Aaron spelling. I just borrow them for your enjoyment

She sat at her desk as she did most afternoons. She looked up briefly to watch as the sun shone through the blinds. How many times had she sat there thinking of the same thing? Actually lately it was two things, but one seemed to weigh on her mind more then the other.

Why was it every time any woman thought she found happiness, the guy she was spending most of her time with went and ruined it for her? But it wasn't quite like that. She had made a choice and now she had to stand by it. Or did she?

Her thoughts were interrupted by the knock on the door frame.

"Hey you. I was around, thought maybe we could get some lunch. What do you say? Feel like being spoiled by your big sister?"

"Well when you put it that way. How can I say no?" She reached over and grabbed her purse before following after her sister.

They sat in the small café eating lunch and talking about everything and nothing. It was what sisters did.

"You still thinking about Cole?"

Phoebe looked up at her sister shocked at the question. "I don't miss him if that's what you mean."

"I didn't ask that." Piper kept her eyes on Phoebe trying to gage her reaction.

"I do now and then. I wonder what went wrong. Where we went wrong."

"It wasn't you Phoebe, it was him."

"Easy for us to say. All he wanted was to love me the way we were." Phoebe paused, her thoughts going back to where they were earlier that day."Before."

"Before Prue died?" Piper finished for her as she reached over and took her sisters hand in her. "It's ok to miss her you know, I do everyday. But it's not ok to beat yourself up over her death or anything that happened after. She would kick your ass for that and you know it."

"I just wonder what would have happened if she hadn't died. Is that so bad?" Phoebe looked to Piper for some guidance as she always had

"No it's not. But you know Grams always said that things happen for a reason. So even if she never died, everything still would have happened the way they had."

Phoebe cast her eyes off the table and looked out to the park next to the café. She watched as a couple walked together hand in hand and wondered if she would ever get that back again in her life. "I gotta get back." She grabbed her purse and pushed back her chair.

"Phoebs."

"Piper please." she looked down at her worried sister, "Just give me sometime." Phoebe bent down and placed a gentle kiss on her sisters' forehead before walking down the street towards The Bay Mirror.

Piper watched, as her baby sister left the restaurant. She knew her sister was hurting, she was to. They both did this time every year. It was just something they would have to deal with every time the calendar rolled over.

Paige sat on the living room floor playing with Wyatt. She had volunteered to watch him, so Piper and Phoebe could have some time together. She tended too tread lightly around both her sisters at this time of year. They had told her that Prue was as much her sister as theirs, but she still let the two of them have this time together. And she knew that Phoebe needed it as much as Piper did. Her older sister had been quiet and reserved the last few days. Paige knew it was in anticipation of the anniversary of Prue's death, but it didn't help that she just turned down a year in Japan with Jason at the same time.

Wyatt looked up at Paige and the look of concern and worry on his face gave her the knowledge that he knew something was going on. But how was she to explain to a baby about life and death and the Aunt he will only hear about, but never know?

Piper walked up the steps to the Manor she shared with her sisters, and still didn't know what she should do or how to get through to Phoebe. "Any one home?"" she called out, though deep down inside she hoped she was alone. She needed time to deal with Prues death on her own.

"Solarium Sis."

Piper held her eyes tight and took a quiet sigh as she heard Paige's voice, just another reminder of what happened two years ago. It wasn't that she didn't love Paige, it just reminded her more of the sister she lost and the sister that Paige would never know.

Piper walked around the corner and smiled as she saw Paige playing with Wyatt. She couldn't help but see some resemblance of Prue right then. She had a hidden playfulness that Piper knew would have shone around her son. Piper let her mind also drift to Phoebe. Wyatt was her world at times and Piper didn't blame her sister for that. She had lost her own child, even if he was evil. It was something that would always be a part of her. A part of her that she kept hidden from Paige and herself. But a part that one day she might have to deal with. Piper knew that things between Phoebe and Jason had cooled down since he left for Hong Kong but she also knew her sister. She knew that Phoebe still held him dear to her heart. And who knows maybe one day he would be the man her little sister truly needed.

Paige looked up and saw Piper standing in the doorway watching her and Wyatt. "Hey Sis."

"Hi." Piper stepped towards her family and lifted Wyatt from the floor. Drawing him close to her for a hug. His tiny arms wrapping around her neck in instinct and love. "How was he?"

"Great as always." Paige hesitated a moment before asking the question on her mind. "How are you? And Phoebe?" She asked though she knew her sisters might still be upset with the anniversary approaching

"We're good. We had lunch and then Phoebe went back to work." Piper answered like it was any other day and lunch.

"So. You don't wanna talk about it."

"Paige she was your sister too. You can ask me anything. And talk about anything."

"I know, I just feel sometime that this is something that you and Phoebe need to deal with together."

"And we appreciate it. But you can't feel that you don't belong with us at this time."

"I know, and I thank you both." Paige replied as she tickled into Wyatt getting the baby laugh that she loved so much.

Piper smiled as Wyatt laughed as Paige tickled him. Everything in her life had changed so much and yet she felt a happiness inside that was beside a sadness. She knew that the sadness would always be there but the happiness would grow.

"Can you watch him a bit longer. I need to take care of something." Piper handed Wyatt to Paige as she bent down and placed kiss on Wyatt's tiny head.

Phoebe sat on the grass starring at the stone before her. Had it really been almost two years? She looked at the date on the stone beside the one she had come to see. 23yrs apart. How could that even be possible? For mother and daughter to share the same date in death. the month may be different, but the number was the same.

"You always said you weren't anything like Mum Prue, but even in death you were her image. Both killed by a demon at a young age, protecting the innocent. Whenever I saw you I saw Mum." She felt the warm tears as she recalled happier moment with her big sister

She had planned to go back to work after she had left the restaurant and Piper, but here she sat on the grass looking at the headstones of Prue and their mother. "I wish you had been here Prue. You would have seen right through Cole and his deceit. You would have stopped me from making the mistake I did."

"She would have loved you and supported you."

Phoebe twisted around to see Piper standing behind her. "You spying on me Sis?" Phoebe half smiled

"No. I just wanted to talk to her. Like you do every week."

Phoebe looked at Piper, her secret revealed. "How…"

"Did I know?" Piper finished for her, "I know you Phoebe, and I come out here now and then, I've seen you here." Piper answered as she sat down next to Phoebe.

Phoebe didn't say anything as she leaned in against Piper.

"I thought you went back to work." Piper said as she held her arms around her sister.

"I was, but then I found myself here."

"I see that." Piper didn't say any more. She knew what Phoebe was going through. It was the same thing she was. The loss and the pain, they both felt each year. "Phoebe you know she loved you with every thing she had right?"

"Yeah, I just can't get past I never got to be there for her. To say goodbye. I was to busy worried about Cole which in the end turned out to be the wrong decision."

"You can't keep beating yourself up over this."

"I know. It's just that lately everything in my life has been so fast and furious. I haven't really had time to sit and think about me or even you lately."

"And Jason keeps popping up in your mind?"

"Yeah." Phoebe sat quiet a moment against Piper. "I keep wondering and waiting for him to become the demon I think he is."

Piper tightened her grip around Phoebe. She knew her sister was still fighting her own demons of the past. And she knew exactly what her sister needed right then. "Phoebe why don't you call him. Tell him to send the jet out to get you, spend some time together. Some demon free time might be just what you need, and I think that is what Prue would want too."

Phoebe didn't move against Piper as the sun set into the sea. They were each caught up in their own thoughts of the love of the big sister they had lost. And into a future they both knew nothing about.

"Piper."

"Yeah honey."

"What if I went? What about the power of three?"

Piper paused a moment. "Well if anything major came up we could send Leo or even Paige, but Honey I think this is something you need to figure out, you and Jason together."

Silence fell on them once again before the drops from the sky gently landed on the two of them. Falling from the clouds they never saw rolling in. Clouds that held a different future with each word they spoke.

"We should get out of her before Prue really lets us have it." Piper suggested as she got up and held her arm around Pheobe, giving her a gently squeeze to let her know she was there for her.

"Give me a minute?" Phoebe answered as she returned Pipers hug

Piper hugged Phoebe tight before letting go and making her way to her Jeep.

Phoebe placed her hand on Prues headstone as the rains fell around her. "Prue please be with me this time. Don't let me fall like I did with Cole. I couldn't take another heartbreak like that. But Jason seems so right, I have to go. I love you big Sis, now and forever. I don't know when I'll be back again so, until we meet again." She leaned over and placed a soft kiss on the now wet headstone as she turned and started for her on vehicle. Leaving behind a sister she might not see again till she joined her in heaven.

The winds changed direction, as if time and destiny was suddenly changed in that one moment. From north to south. The wind now blew in a different direction. A direction that could change everyone's lives in a single heart beat. The heartbeat of a loved one, love that was there and is there. But no one knew to where it would come to change the wind back again.