OMG It's the Kid And Grandpa
Bedtime stories xD
By Gandalf bergamot and the great cow
Also this story is a true story. Lol enjoy
Also what is a cow
"Good night the kid." Said grandpa at 1:00am. "I WANT TO WATCH MORE SPONGEBOB" said the kid. "No more Spongebob." Said grandpa. "FINE BUT TELL ME A STORY" said the kid. "Fine." Said grandpa. "Once upon a time, there was a kid. His name was the kid. The end." Said grandpa. "WHAT KIND OF BEDTIME STORY IS THAT?!" Said the kid. "A really good bedtime story, son." Said grandpa. "ITS NOT A STORY" said the kid. The kid threw grandpa out the window. The kid took his rifle and shot grandpa. "Ouch." Said grandpa. Grandpa climbed back into the apartment. "Ok then I'll tell you something different." Said grandpa. "YOU BETTER DO IT NOW OR ELSE MORE PAIN" said the kid. "Do you like Fover?" Said grandpa. "You mean my best friend? I LOVE HIM" Said the kid. ""Fooooooooooooooooooovvvveerrrr" Said his mom. Fover had ran away the other day. He was hiding in a cave where the dead people live. "Dead people don't live here." Said Fover as he was lying in a lake of blood. Then all of a sudden a spider came out of his mouth and then before his eyes he started sicking spiders. His eyes melted and his skin turned into a skeleton. "AAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH." Yelled Fover as he woke up in his own bed that was rad red. "Me alive." Said Fover in a squeaky squirrel voice. Then a skull came through his ceiling and he died and went to the Nether. The devil came out and started dancing around the lava and fell in and died then teleported to heaven which made the devil good and the angel bad. "Fover is dead?" Said Fover in a question. George Washington passed on a horse and gave a cherry tree a thwack with his strong axe. "Hold it hold it hold it." George said after he accidentally chopped off Fovers head. Red streamer blew out of his head and he fell down to the nether. The devil (the good devil) popped out and said, "George killed you?" Said the good devil. "Yeah." Said Fover." Said grandpa. "WHAT KIND OF BEDTIME STORY IS THAT?!" Said the kid. "A really good bedtime story, son." Said grandpa. "IT'S NOT A STORY" said the kid. "OK OK I'LL TELL A DIFFERENT STORY ONLY IF YOU DON'T KILL ME" said grandpa. "NOW" said the kid. "Ok ok" said grandpa. Grandpa flipped open another book and began reading. "Worker: we've all had some bad jobs, bad jobs right whatever we gotta do it my first job... burger king my brother got me the job, my brother got me the job. (chuckles in audience) worker:(sarcastic laughter, ha ha ha) (audience laughs harder) my brother was the manager. He thought it would be cool brothers looking out for each other you know what I mean. He put me on drive through duty every night. what drove me crazy was that people thought up yelling at the drive through person. Hi welcome to burger king,person yelling: graaaaaaaaaaah) Worker: oh you speak chewbaca. Person: graaaaaaaaaaah)worker: I'm bleeding from the ears perchino. we deal food not missiles go governor now pull around! What really ticked me off was when people talked too softly. Hi welcome to burger king can I take your order? Person2: Pickles and a pickle and the pickles and the pickles and the pickles and the pickles and the pickles and a milkshake and the pickles and the pickles and the pickles and the pickles, anything else? CHICKEN TENDERS SPRAY THE SAUCE ON MY CAR, Worker: GET SOME CHICKEN TENDERS AND SAUCE, SHE WANTS IT HER WAY. Fryer person: what? You wanna waste all of mah sauce! I'll waste your tables!
╯°□°）╯ ┻━┻ FLIP THAT TABLE.□°）╯ ┻━┻ FLIP THAT TABLE.
┻━┻ ヽ(°□°ヽ FLIP THIS TABLE.╯°□°）╯ ┻━┻ FLIP THAT TABLE.□°）╯ ┻━┻ FLIP THAT TABLE.
┻━┻ ヽ(°□°ヽ FLIP THIS TABLE.
┻━┻ ＼( °□° )／ ┻━┻ FLIP ALL THE TABLES!
Nooooo! Not my tables!
＼( °□° )／ RAAAHHHH! They're all flipped good luck eating on them yolo
□°）╯ ┻━┻ FLIP THAT TABLE.
┻━┻ ヽ(°□°ヽ FLIP THIS TABLE.
┻━┻ ＼( °□° )／ ┻━┻ FLIP ALL THE TABLES!
Nooooo! Not my tables!
＼( °□° )／ RAAAHHHH! They're all flipped good luck eating on them yolo
□°）╯ ┻━┻ FLIP THAT TABLE.
┻━┻ ヽ(°□°ヽ FLIP THIS TABLE.
┻━┻ ＼( °□° )／ ┻━┻ FLIP ALL THE TABLES!
Nooooo! Not my tables!
＼( °□° )／ RAAAHHHH! They're all flipped good luck eating on them yolo
□°）╯ ┻━┻ FLIP THAT TABLE.
┻━┻ ヽ(°□°ヽ FLIP THIS TABLE.
┻━┻ ＼( °□° )／ ┻━┻ FLIP ALL THE TABLES! The kid will go to sleep.
Nooooo! Not my tables!
＼( °□° )／ RAAAHHHH! They're all flipped good luck eating on them yolo
□°）╯ ┻━┻ FLIP THAT TABLE.
┻━┻ ヽ(°□°ヽ FLIP THIS TABLE.
┻━┻ ＼( °□° )／ ┻━┻ FLIP ALL THE TABLES!
Nooooo! Not my tables!
＼( °□° )／ RAAAHHHH! They're all flipped good luck eating on them yolo
□°）╯ ┻━┻ FLIP THAT TABLE.
┻━┻ ヽ(°□°ヽ FLIP THIS TABLE.
┻━┻ ＼( °□° )／ ┻━┻ FLIP ALL THE TABLES!
Nooooo! Not my tables!
＼( °□° )／ RAAAHHHH! They're all flipped good luck eating on them yolo
□°）╯ ┻━┻ FLIP THAT TABLE.
┻━┻ ヽ(°□°ヽ FLIP THIS TABLE.
┻━┻ ＼( °□° )／ ┻━┻ FLIP ALL THE TABLES!
Nooooo! Not my tables!
＼( °□° )／ RAAAHHHH! They're all flipped good luck eating on them yolo
□°）╯ ┻━┻ FLIP THAT TABLE.
┻━┻ ヽ(°□°ヽ FLIP THIS TABLE.
┻━┻ ＼( °□° )／ ┻━┻ FLIP ALL THE TABLES!
Nooooo! Not my tables!
＼( °□° )／ RAAAHHHH! They're all flipped good luck eating on them yolo
□°）╯ ┻━┻ FLIP THAT TABLE.
┻━┻ ヽ(°□°ヽ FLIP THIS TABLE.
┻━┻ ＼( °□° )／ ┻━┻ FLIP ALL THE TABLES!
Nooooo! Not my tables!
＼( °□° )／ RAAAHHHH! They're all flipped good luck eating on them yolo
□°）╯ ┻━┻ FLIP THAT TABLE.
┻━┻ ヽ(°□°ヽ FLIP THIS TABLE.
┻━┻ ＼( °□° )／ ┻━┻ FLIP ALL THE TABLES!
Nooooo! Not my tables!
＼( °□° )／ RAAAHHHH! They're all flipped good luck eating on them yolo
□°）╯ ┻━┻ FLIP THAT TABLE.
┻━┻ ヽ(°□°ヽ FLIP THIS TABLE.
┻━┻ ＼( °□° )／ ┻━┻ FLIP ALL THE TABLES!
Nooooo! Not my tables!
＼( °□° )／ RAAAHHHH! They're all flipped good luck eating on them yolo
□°）╯ ┻━┻ FLIP THAT TABLE.
┻━┻ ヽ(°□°ヽ FLIP THIS TABLE.
┻━┻ ＼( °□° )／ ┻━┻ FLIP ALL THE TABLES!
Nooooo! Not my tables!
＼( °□° )／ RAAAHHHH! They're all flipped good luck eating on them yolo
╯°□°）╯︵ ┻━┻ FLIP THAT TABLE.
┻━┻ ︵ ヽ(°□°ヽ) FLIP THIS TABLE.
┻━┻ ︵ ＼( °□° )／ ︵ ┻━┻ FLIP ALL THE TABLES
ಠ_ಠ Son.
ಠ_ಠ Put. The kid will go to sleep.
ಠ_ಠ The tables.
ಠ_ಠ Back!
(°□°) ಠ_ಠ ！
Worker: NEVER!" Said grandpa. "WHAT KIND OF BEDTIME STORY IS THAT?!" Said the kid. "A really good bedtime story, son." Said grandpa. "IT'S NOT A STORY" said the kid. The kid called for the police to come and take grandpa away. When grandpa was leaving, the kid took his money and went to Little Caesars and asked for the midget Caesar. "Hey kid there is no such thing as the midget Caesar." Said the worker that worked there. So the kid shot him and he was a zombie. That means that now the kid has started the zombie apocalypse and the kid was bombing the zombies with a plane. But zombie grandpa came and ate the kid. The plane went down and blew up several zombies. "WHAT KIND OF BEDTIME STORY IS THAT?!" Said the kid. "A really good bedtime story, son." Said grandpa. "IT'S NOT A STORY" said the kid. The kid took Febreze and sprayed it in grandpa's eyes. "AAGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHH" said grandpa. Grandpa fell out the window and landed on a car. Someone with a bomb was in the car and it blew up so big, Mars aliens could hear it, see it and smell it. So they took their UFOs and invaded Earth. The richest man on Earth couldn't take it and bought a $100,000,000,000,000 bomb and blew up the entire world and no one had air and died then the body's flew to the sun and they burned. "WHAT KIND OF BEDTIME STORY IS THAT?!" Said the kid. "A really good bedtime story, son." Said grandpa. "ITS NOT A STORY" said the kid. "Fine. I will tell you about something amazing. His name was Mr. WAXY man. There once was a person named Mr. WAXY man. All he made was WAX. He called his factory WAXonWAXoff. Mr. WAXY man said that his factory made WAX. Mr. WAXY man said that WAX is great to use on WAX. So he WAXED everything in sight. But it was hair WAX so everything turned into hair. Even people had lots of hair on them. They even had mustaches. Mr. WAXY man said that his factory workers made WAX. So people went to the factory. They took all the WAX. But then the WAX grew legs and arms and started to destroy the city. So Mr. WAXY man gave the WAX more WAX. So the WAX gave WAX to his cousin, WAX. And the other WAX WAXED the WAX. So the factory named WAXonWAXoff made WAX so people who have been in a statement issued by a car and the other hand is not the same said, "I like WAX". Mr. WAXY man got mad and threw everyone who said 'I like WAX' at the president. The president said "I like WAX" and mr. WAXY man threw the president into the ocean. And the president swam to China. Then he didn't have any money so he tried to steal a boat. But he didn't like the full tank engine with 3 motors and lots and lots of food and water on it. So he went to a boat that was broken down and had 1 paddle and no food. Back in the US, vmr. WAXY man who was the first time in the world to me that you can do it. But the WAX came back. The WAX WAXED mr. WAXY man. The president died so Mr. WAXY man became president. Then a bus full of orphan children came and Mr. WAXY man came in and said "i'm gonna kill you guys." And it was easy to kill them because they all ran to the back of the bus. Then Dora came and got into a fight with him. He smashed Dora's face into the ground and then smashes and smashed and smashed then smashes and smashed and smashed then smashes and smashed and smashed her face into the ground some more so her face looked like it was smashes and smashed and smashed then smashes and smashed and smashed then smashes and smashed and smashed. A pig and a salamander were watching them, they were playing with the app speak it and a creeper came out. Back to this story… A big man face came out and ate mr. WAXY man. The giant head went to space and got killed by aliens. Mr. WAXY man climbed out of the many faces face. He jumped off the planet acting like a parkour genius and fell on earth so he died. He woke up in the hospital where people were researching and studying him. A Japanese guy named Kim yoo suk said "double yew tee ef." And then Mr. WAXY man made a law that kids can get married. So a 4 year old boy and girl got married. But Kim yoo suk said even littler kids could get married. But mr. WAXY man didn't like it so he threw Kim yoo suk to a different planet where the manface died. Kim yoo suk got eaten by the aliens. Then mr. WAXY man blew up the planet. He tried to be a parkour genius again but he went to the sun. I don't know why, but sanic was there. "Gotta go fast" said sanic and mr. WAXY man WAXED his face and threw him to a different galaxy where everything is slower so sanic became slower. Then mr. WAXY man threw a supernova at it and the galaxy blew up. Right after the planet blew up, the fluffy kids came to see what was happening. Everything was happening. Even an octopus. Everything in the universe does not make sense. Why we live. I don't think that the government has been a good one. Anyways, mr. WAXY man sent the fluffy kids back to earth with WAX on there faces. When the fluffy kids came back, the WAX killed their WAXED faces. But they woke up in the hospital with Kim yoo suk. Kim yoo suk said "double yew tee ef" but the kids beat Kim yoo suk. "No one likes you Kim yoo suk" said the fluffy kids. Kim yoo suk didn't like that. "Hey look I'm on tv" said Kim Yoo suk. "Omfg I'm so beautful" said Kim. He also said double yew tee ef. "No your not Kim" said the fluffy kids. Then he Jumped out a window and died. He woke up in the hospital with Kim yoo suk so he jumped out of the window and died. Then he woke up in the hospital with two Kim yoo suk, so he jumped out a window and died. The he woke up in a hospital with three Kim yoo suk , he jumped out a window and died. He woke up in the hospital with 4 Kim yoo suk. Then they all jumped out the window. They all died. They all woke up in the hospital with 5 Kim yoo suk. Then they all said double yew tee ef to the illuminati. Then Black Jesus came and killed Kim yoo suk. " I have one last word to say." Said Kim. "Double yew tee ef." He started choking and coughed out rat and some trash then he WAXY man went in the room. He started to sniff Kim yoo suk. His nose vibrated and went up and down. His nose was as huge as a vacuum and looked like one too. It kept sniffing all over and sniffed and sniffed and sniffed some he sniffed out the rat and found the trash by sniffing then he sniffed and sniffed and sniffed some more. He sniffed a car he sniffed a pencil and he sniffed your moms butt and her arm pits. And sniffed the illuminati. But then the illuminati stared at him with his triangle eye. So mr WAXY man didn't understand so he put eye drops in his eye. The illuminati called for molester moon. "I gotta go faster" said mr WAXY man. So mr WAXY man called up sanic and went "GOTTA GO,FAST!" They got to Sesame Street and stopped for a rest with some milk and cookies because that's all they eat at Sesame Street. Elmo and Abbie the fairy came. They were singing the abc's. They messed up and said "abcde(fu)ghijklmnopqrstvwxyz. Then mr WAXY man left with a tank and shot out the letter a which exploded Elmo's face off. Mr WAXY Man started to sniff some more so he sniffed and sniffed and sniffed. He sniffed some paper he sniffed a fly he sniffed Elmo's bloody face. He sniffed his ****. He then sniffed some pics of candy and thought they were real so he ate them. Skrillex and Deadmau5 and Diplo came to see mr waxy man to talk to him about sniffing too much, the weird part is he sniffed them. They laughed uncontrollably because his nose vibrated and did weird stuff. It was really long. He snorted Skrillex and Diplo and Deadmau5 into his nose because it was so big, he sniffed a limo in his nose. But then he sniffed a fork and it got lodged in his nose. Then cried like a little baby. It hurt like doggy doodoo. And that reminded him, he's a dog molester for smiley Miley. So mr WAXY man put alcohol on his boo boo. Then put on a Dora bandage. Then he went to WAXonWAXoff to tell them about his boo boo. He bragged and bragged. But the workers at WAXonWAXoff told Billy Mays and the Shamwow guy that mr. WAXY man was bragging about his boo boo. So they went to WAXonWAXoff for a donut. Then they gave him sales. "Hi, are you tired of doing things on your own? Well with only 3 payments of $200.99, you can have your own slave! Who cares if it's Illegal, we will send one for only 3 payments of $200.99! Never do work again!" Said the Shamwow guy. "Hi. Billy mays here. We will give you a slave for only 2 payments of $200.99! Plus a little kid slave for extra work. Not like the Shamwow guy who has 3 payments of $200.99 and no little slave." Said Billy Mays. The Shamwow guy got mad and punched Billy Mays in the face. "Hi, we're at Shamwow will give you an entire family of slaves for free! Yes free! And a free beaten down shack for the family of slaves! You won't find this deal anywhere else!" But Billy Mays was mad. "Hi, Billy Mays here, with a new deal! We will give you ice cream! Yes ice cream for free!" Said Billy Mays. Then mr. WAXY man said, "OMG AN ICE CREAM CONE! MINE MINE MINE MINE MINE MINE MINE MINE MINE! OMG ICE CREAM!" And then he waxed the ice cream. Billy Mays told the ice cream man for a ice cream cone. "That will be $2000000000000000.01 sir." Said the ice cream man. "Ok" said Billy Mays. He gave him a penny. "OMG IM SO RICH" said the ice cream man. "I only have a penny which is one cent." Said Billy Mays. "U lied I wanted $2000000000000000.01. I'm call 119." Said the ice cream man. Then Tim Wimmer said its 191. "ITS 911 YOU IDIOTS!" Said the ghost of Kim yoo suk. So he picked up the phone that said phoney phone on it and called, 1-800-555-911. And he was wrong. He accidentally called the ecilop. (Police backwards.) "Hi pole-lice." He said. "No it's police." Kim yoo suk said. "Poh Leece u say?" Said Ice cream man. "IT'S THE POLICE" said Kim Yoo suk. "Paleeyese?" Said ice cream man. "GIVE ME THE PHONE" said Kim Yoo suk. Kim Yoo suk took the phone and smashed it. "I'M DONE WITH LIFE" said Kim Yoo suk and everyone died." "WHAT KIND OF BEDTIME STORY IS THAT?!" Said the kid. "A really good bedtime story, son." Said grandpa. "IT'S NOT A STORY" said the kid. "FINE I WILL TELL ANOTHER FOVER STORY. Fover and his dad play by a cliff. Fover was waiting for his dad to come home for thanksgiving even though it was July. Someone knocked on the door. "Oh boy oh boy oh boy" said Fover. Fover opened the door. "Hello would you like to buy a bracelet?" Said a marketer. "WHY WOULD I WANT TO" said Fover. "DADDY" said Fover in squeaky squirrel voice. "Hi son let's go play Marco Polo. I have the perfect place to play it." Said Fover's dad. So they took their truck to a cliff. "Now we can play, son." Said Fover's dad. Fover's dad was it first. "Marco!" Said Fover's dad. "Polo!" Said Fover at the edge of the cliff. Fover's dad walks toward Fover. Fover's dad pushes Fover trying to look for him. Fover falls off the cliff into water. "Fover not dead." Said Fover after then eaten by a shark. "Marco!" Said Fover's dad. Fover's dad walked off the cliff into the shark's mouth. Fin." Said grandpa. "WHAT KIND OF BEDTIME STORY IS THAT?!" Said the kid. "A really good bedtime story, son." Said grandpa. "ITS NOT A STORY" said the kid. The kid killed grandpa but forgot today was hump day so he killed himself. "WHAT KIND OF BEDTIME STORY IS THAT?!" Said the kid. "A really good bedtime story, son." Said grandpa. "IT'S NOT A STORY" said the kid. "Fine I will tell another story. It's about me and Dora. "Hey John?" Asked Dora. "STOP CALLING ME JOHN. CALL ME GRANDPA" said John. "- HEY OVER AT THAT 'SAID JOHN' THING WHAT THE HECK, CHANGE IT TO GRANDPA." Said Grandma. "-NOT GRANDMA EITHER I WANT GRANDPA." Said Grandpa. 'Jeez the weez' said the narrator. "So, Grandpa? Can you tell me a story?" Asked Dora. "Sure." Said Ariana Grande. "- YEAH YOU THINK THAT 'SAID ARIANA GRANDE' THING IS FUNNY STILL, SHUT YOUR PIE HOLE." Said Grandpa. "Okay tell me a story." Said Swiper. "- OH YOU THINK THAT 'SAID SWIPER' THING IS FUNNY WELL, I GOT A MACHINE GUN AND A MACHETE." Said Dora. "I got a story, and it enables real life." Said Grandpa, "It's about killing the narrator." "Sounds good to me." Said Dora. 'AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH' Screamed the narrator. And they killed the narrator. And then got me. The extra narrator. Hiiiiiiii. The kid will go to sleep.
"Well the story starts like this... Once upon a time, in a woods, there was a man. He was inventing a machine. It would take people from allllllll over the world and put them in the machine. It would grind them into 100,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,001 pieces, to be exact. Then Dora asked map to take her to the pool. "No." Said Map. He wouldn't stop. "No no no no no no no no no." Said Map wanting to kill her. He made her trip and she broke her skull. Then George Washington passed by and gave the tree a mighty thwack and cut off Dora's and Grandpa's head. Then Abraham Lincoln told a boring speech so he turned on some pop music and started a party. Then the disco ball fell on Abraham. Then the Dora drove a car off a cliff into lava. So they died. "The end." Said Grandpa. "Hey Grandpa, tell me a different story." Said Dora. "NO WAY" said Grandpa. "WHY ARE YOU YELLING" yelled Dora. "BECAUSE I CAN" Said Grandpa. "YOU'RE MAKING ME PISSED GRANDPA" Said Dora wanting to kill Grandpa. So she went up and took Grandpa's money and she started to throw coins at him. He started to freak out. So he took a suicide bomber and threw it at Dora. The bomber exploded. So she used Dark Magic on Grandpa. The Dark magic went to Grandpa -|
The kid will go to sleep. M. Oh no.
"Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!" Laughed Dora. "I'm tired." Said Grandpa. Grandpa tried to go to sleep. But a demon came and slapped him. He awoke. "Now. Tell me a story. NOOOWWW." Said Dora.
"Uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.." Groaned Grandpa, "I want to kill you but I'm too tired."Grandpa took a knife and tried stab Dora but he missed. Dora threw a fat man at grandpa. "ITS SO HEAVY" said grandpa. Grandpa passed out and Dora drew a mustache on him. Grandpa woke up. "What happened" said Grandpa. "TELL ME A STORY NOW" said Dora. "NOW NOW or DIE" said grandpa. Grandpa stabbed her and she died. "YES! I AM FREE FOREVER!" Said grandpa. "No your not" said the kid. Fin." Said grandpa. "WHAT KIND OF BEDTIME STORY IS THAT?!" Said the kid. "A really good bedtime story, son." Said grandpa. "IT'S NOT A STORY" said the kid. The kid called for his prankster gangster Gandalf Bergamot. "Lol you are dead but you don't know it lolololololol you got rekt and trolled you don't even know it but you are also a horse because you have a big nose and you eat hay lots and lots and lots and lots of poop and hay lololololol you horse you get rekt and trolled by the prankster gangster wowow why do you got to be a horse all the time and eat hay and poop why why lol I'm the prankster gangster and you can't beat me you horse and you got no horsepower because your a horse not a truck lol I'm the truck and you're the horse and I ram my horsepower into your little horse body my truck hits you like a bird lol I just keep rolling because I'm the prankster gangster you dead horse lololololol you will always get rekt from the prankster gangster because I'm not pink sheep don't say I'm pink sheep I am Gandalf Bergamot and I own the towns and citys of all over the world as I roam the streets being a prankster gangster and own you as a horse because you are a horse if you didn't know that you are a horse because you do not know that because you are a horse now if you want to fight me let's play some cards as I beat you because a horse can't play cards and your a horse so lololololololololololololololol get trolled by me the prankster gangster of all and thank you tonight and the academy thank you thank you see even the audience is horses lololololol I'm the prankster gangster can't stop this dun dun dun dun dum dum do do can't stop this lololololol horse you glad I told that you are a horse you horses." Said the prankster gangster named Gandalf Bergamot. "That's why I look soooo ugly, I'm a horse." Said grandpa. "Hey I'm though not a horse I'm a kid." Said the kid. "3 reasons you are a horse." Said Gandalf Bergamot.
You are ugly
You have a big nose
Everyone is an animal The kid will go to sleep.
Your mom bought you at an illegal black market
?You look like a horse
And you smell like one too?
I'm the prankster gangster and I know everything in the world
You trot everywhere and look extremely dumb
"That's why you are a horse." Said Gandalf Bergamot. "But you said 3 reasons." Said the kid. "Well I don't really care what my facts are you horse." Said Gandalf Bergamot. "LETS KILL GANDALF BERGAMOT" said the kid. "Ok." Said grandpa. So the kid and grandpa killed Gandalf Bergamot. "WHAT KIND OF BEDTIME STORY IS THAT?!" Said the kid. "A really good bedtime story, son." Said grandpa. "IT'S NOT A STORY" said the kid. "FINE LETS HERE A GOOD STORY FROM THE KID" said grandpa. "Ok. Once upon a time there was a grandpa AND HE HAS TO READ ME A STORY" said the kid. "FINE I WILL. It's called Another Christmas Story. "RINGGGGGGGGGG" ringed the school bell. "I don't want to learn math, mr. WAXY man." Said the kid to mr. WAXY man. "Well I'm going to the factory that makes WAX." Said mr. WAXY man. "Ok well I'm going home to see my dumb grandpa." Said the kid "He's buying me what I want, because I tell him to and he has to buy it or else.." "Hope you get an F soon!" Said mr. WAXY man. "Have a terrible Christmas Mr. WAXY man!" Said the kid."You too!" Said mr. WAXY man. The kid walked home. "Hi dumb grandpa" said the kid "BUY ME A PONY" "No." Said grandpa. "No" said Boots. Boots is our pet who only says no. "NO NO NO!" Said Boots. "NO NO NO!" Boots then said "I can say no more." And they put duct tape over his mouth and they wrote no on it so all he said was no. "NO NO NO!" It said on the duct tape. One day boots tried to rip it off. He tried to pull it off but it hurt. The kid smacked Boots with a boot. "Did you rip off the duct tape? Said the kid. "NO!" Said boots with duct tape in his hand and no skin on his lips. "YOU RIPPED OFF THE DUCT TAPE!" Said the kid. "Yeah." Said boots "I'm hungry." Boots ate the duct tape. Mr WAXY man stepped in the room. "WHAT IS GOING ON?" Screamed mr WAXY man. "We need cereal." Said the kid. "NO" said Boots. "Ok I will go get some cereal." Said mr WAXY man. Mr WAXY man went out the door. "WAIT WE'RE COMING TOO SO YOU DON'T GET THE WRONG CEREAL" Screamed the kid, "COME ON PEOPLE LETS GO NOW, AND I MEAN EVERYONE. EVEN KIM YOO SUK" "Double yew tee ef." said Kim Yoo suk. "What did he say grandpa?" Asked the kid. "I don't know and he shouldn't come with you know how much trouble he makes at the store." Said grandpa. "Ok let's goooo!" Said the kid. "Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee" said everyone when they went to the food store. They walked into the food store and saw Billy May's ghost. "Hi Billy Mays" said the kid. "Hi, Billy Mays here with a brand new product." Said Billy Mays. "Can I buy it now?" Asked grandpa. "Yes but it's $19.95." Billy Mays responded. "BUY!" Yelled grandpa. Billy Mays gave grandpa the product. "$19.95 please.." Said Billy Mays. Grandpa gave him a penny. "THANK YOU THANK YOU I'M SO RICH" screamed Billy Mays. The product was a poison spork. "I'm going to eat my cereal with this thing yay" said grandpa. But a robber came and stole the spork. "I'M going to eat my cereal with this!" Said the robber. The robber took a bite of Fruity Pebbles. "Yum-" said the robber. Then the robber died of the poison spork. "Ok I'm going to get some cereal." Said grandpa. They walked into the food store. "There's the cereal aisle" said the kid. They ran to the cereal aisle. "Weeeeeeeeeeeee" they said when they were running there. Boots, grandpa, the kid, mr WAXY man and Fover stopped at the aisle. "WAIT. WHERE DID Fover COME FROM?" Asked the kid. "Want cereal too" said Fover. Fover grabbed Mcdonald's Big Mac And Fries Gerber Baby Food Frosted with sugar Baby Food cereal.. "Mmm favorite cereal" said Fover, crunching the Mcdonald's Big Mac And Fries Gerber Baby Food Frosted with sugar Baby Food cereal. But then, an elf popped out of Fovers Mcdonald's Big Mac And Fries Gerber Baby Food Frosted with sugar Baby Food cereal box. L"It's so hot in that box wow.. Oh sorry. HELLO PEOPLE!" Said the elf. "Hi" they all said. "NO" said Boots. Boots kicked the elf in the face and pinned the elf down. "Why are you here?" "Because Santa is in trouble!" Said the elf. "Oh let's go to the North Pole then. Wee-" Said grandpa. "Santa doesn't live at the North Pole." Said the elf. "Then where does he live? NOW" said the kid. "In Mexico." Said the elf. "Why does he live there now?" Asked grandpa. "He's always lived there." Said the elf. "Ok let's goooooooo! Weeeeeeeeeee-" said everyone till Billy Mays stopped them. "Hi, Billy Mays here and I want to go with you because I want to see Santa" said Billy Mays. "Ok" said everyone, "Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee" they all said. Then they finally got to Mexico. "Ok what now elf? Where do I go?" Asked grandpa. "Take a-" BUZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ KAPUFFFFF. There was a laser beam that came from the sky and made the elf explode. "THAT'S WHY YOU NEED LEARN ABOUT ME OR YOU WILL EXPLODE" yelled the sun. "Ok.. Let's go ask this guy" said grandpa. They walked up to the guy. "Hi can you tell us where we are?" Asked grandpa. "1000 pesos" said the guy, "or you can get me a date." "Ok let's get this guy a date." Said the kid. The kid walked up to a ugly girl. "Hi do you want a date?" "Yes" said the girl. "Ok follow me. Go to that guy" said the kid. The girl walked to the guy. "Hi" said the girl. "Eww your ugly" said the guy, "get me a better one." "Ok said the kid. The kid ran to a really pretty lady. "Hi come with me to get free roadkill" said the kid. "OH MY GOSH OH MY GOSH OH MY GOSH" yelled the lady. She followed the kid to the guy. "Here you go guy" said the kid. "Oh my gosh so beautiful" said the guy, "here take this map." "Map, map, map, map, map" said map. "NO NO NO" said Boots. Boots walked up to the map and teared it into a trillion pieces. "Map, map, map, map, map, map, map, map, map, map, map, map, map, map, map, map, map, map, map, map, map, map, map, map, map, map, map, map, map, map, map, map, map, map, map, map, map, map, map, map, map" said map. "NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO" said Boots. So Boots called for gps instead. They got a gps for 2 pesos they found in a old woman's purse. "Gps gps gps gps gp-" said the gps but was electrocuted by Boots. "NO NO NO" said Boots. "Now how are we going to get there?" Said Billy Mays. "That sign that says North Pole!" Said grandpa. Everyone went up the hill to Santa's workshop. "Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee" they all said. They walked up to the workshop of Santa. "OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG SANTA" said Billy Mays. "Sanda?" Said Fover, "I want a rad red new bed." Then the elves came out. "Lula bye say goodnight.." Said the elves. The doors closed behind them. "Ohh.. GIMMI PRESENTS NOW NOW NOW" said the kid. Traps bursted out. "NO NO NO" said Boots. Boots kicked elf after elf. Then kicked Will Ferrell from Elf. Then the weapons roared and fired at them. They took cover and used Will Ferrell as a shield. "Quick into this dark hardly lighted room!" Said grandpa, "Will Ferrell is running out!" "I am really running out" said Will Ferrell. Then Will Ferrell ran out of the workshop. They ran into the dark hardly lighted room. Then Santa was In the room tied up. "Santa can I have a pony for Christmas? I MEAN NOW" said the kid. "And I want a rad red new bed" said Fover. "MHMM HMMH MHM" yelled Santa. "Well. Well. Well. Wells are nice and bells are nice too. Welcome to this lair I built with Bob the builder." Said a shaded elf in the corner. "NOOOOOOOOO NO" said Boots and kicked the elf in the face. Then threw the elf in a box and went to bury it in snow. "YAY SANTA" everyone said. They untied Santa. "Thank you kids. You helped me a lot tonight." Said Santa. "GIMMI AN XBOX ONE AND A PONY NOW NOW NOW NOW" yelled the kid. "And I want rad red new bed." Said Fover. "Ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho ho." Said Santa. Then Boots came back. "NO NO NO NO NO" said Boots. "Ho ho ho. Do you want the new NO machine?" Said Santa. Santa gave Boots the NO machine. "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO" Boots said into the machine. "Now you learned a lesson today.. Do you know what it was? Yes! Nothing!" Said Santa. They all went home. "Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee" they said when they were going home. They got home and opened the door. "KIM WAT IS GOING ON?" Said the kid. "I put bear in the house" said Kim Yoo suk. Then a bear came. "CALL ANIMAL CONTROL GRANDPA" said the kid. "MY PHONE NEEDS TO CHARGE" said grandpa. "Pizza.." Said Chica. "NO PIZZA CHICA" said the kid. "What the.." Said mr WAXY man. "ITS CALLING SHHHHH" said grandpa. "Hello animal control." said the phone. "SON, THE PHONE IS TALKING TO ME WHAT DO I DO" said grandpa. "Hello?" said the phone. "GIMME THE PHONE" said the kid, "Hello person." "Hello where are you?" said the phone. "AHHHHH STALKER" said the kid and threw the phone on the ground and broke it. But the door broke down. "I bored." said the bear. But then Will Ferrell came back. "How dare you leave me there in Mexico!" Said Will Ferrell, "Now be destroyed!" "THROW THE CEREAL" said grandpa. "But I love my Mcdonald's Big Mac And Fries Gerber Baby Food Frosted with sugar Baby Food cereal" said Fover. "I DON'T CARE THROW IT NOW" said the kid. The kid threw the Mcdonald's Big Mac And Fries Gerber Baby Food Frosted with sugar Baby Food cereal at Will Ferrell. "OWWIE" said Will Ferrell. "Now what are you going to do with my phone?" said grandpa. "Lets fix it Bob the Builder." said the kid. Bob and the kid fixed it. "We fixed it!" said Bob the Builder. "THAT'S A TERRIBLE PHRASE" said the kid. The kid then called Boots to take him out. So Boots took Bob the Builder and stuffed him in a box, then started to Break The Ice and the bear fell in. Then threw Bob the Builder in the water. Waited an hour, then it was frozen. Under the ice, the bear and Bob the Builder was trying to get up but couldn't. Then the bear and Bob the Builder drowned. Then took Bob the Builder and threw him in a truck to the cereal factory and would be turned into cereal. "NO" said Boots when the truck was driving away to the cereal factory. Then Boots ran home. "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO" said Boots when he came home. "Ok then. Well Im going to the food store to sell a new product." said Billy Mays. "Wait. Where is the cereal?" said the kid. "I guess we will have to go get some." said grandpa." Said grandpa. "WHAT KIND OF BEDTIME STORY IS THAT?!" Said the kid. "A really good bedtime story, son." Said grandpa. "ITS NOT A STORY" said the kid. "Ok ok don't kill me just what do you want?" Said grandpa. "GRANDPA GET ME A SLAVE" said the kid. "It's my job." Said grandpa. So grandpa got a slave. "Here." Said grandpa and gave the kid the slave. "Yay" said the kid, "DO MY BIDDING SLAVE" "What is bidding" said the slave. "DO MY WORK" said the kid. "Where is your work. I no see work" said the slave. "AHHHHHHHHHHHHH" said the kid. "I leave now." Said the slave. The slave left. "Well that sucks." Said the kid. "It's time for school." Said grandpa. "NO NO NO" said the kid and Boots. "Or else you will have to give granny your taffy" said grandpa. "Ok fine. Because I love my taffy." Said the kid. The kid and grandpa drove to the school. They turned on Z104. "Uh grandpa this station was soooo 2014." Said the kid. "FINE LET'S LISTEN TO SMOOTH JAZZ" said grandpa. Grandpa turned on smooth jazz. "UGH IT'S TERRIBLE MUSIC" said the kid. "HAHAHA" said grandpa. "TURN IT OFFF" said the kid. "NEVEEEEERRR" said grandpa. They then got to school. The kid walked into the school. "Today's top song today is… SMOOTH JAZZ!" Said the announcements. "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO" said the kid. The kid walked into the principal's office and slapped his face. "NO" said the kid. "Fine it will be nyan cat for 10 hours." Said the principal. The principal turned on nyan cat because the kid's grandpa can sue him. "HA JUST KIDDING I AM NEVER PUTTING ON NYAN CAT BECAUSE ITS SOOO ANNOYING" said the principal. "WELL MY GRANDPA WILL HAVE TO SUE YOU NOW" said the kid. Grandpa came with Sue in his hands. "GET SUED" said grandpa. "YAY" screamed all the kids. Grandpa threw Sue at the principal. "AHHH IT SMELLS SO BAD" said the principal. "Take the day off kids!" Said grandpa. "YAY" said the kids. "AND ALSO HAVE ALL THIS HOMEWORK" said grandpa. "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO" said the kids. "YEAH NOW I LOOK SUPER COOL WITH THE COOL KIDS" said grandpa. "Grandpa you're not cool because you just gave us 5 pounds of homework. SO GET AWAY" said the kid. "Shut up the kid I am cool" said grandpa. "NO YOUR NOT" said the kid. "Fine no more taffy. It goes granny." Said grandpa. "NOOOO MY TAFFY" said the kid. "You dang kid gimme my taffy" said granny. "NO GRANNY" said the kid. "GIMME MY TAFFY NOW" said granny. "I WILL KILL YOU GRANNY" said the kid. "YOU WILL NEVER GET MEE" said granny. Granny took the taffy and ran. "GRANNY COME BACK" said the kid. "NO YOU STUPID KID" said granny. "NOOOO I'VE BEEN COLLECTING TAFFY ALL MY LIFE PLEASE COME BACK" said the kid. "OH YEAH? LET'S EAT THE TAFFY" said granny. Granny started to eat the taffy. "MY TAFFY NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO" said the kid. "OH MY GOSH THE TAFFY IS SOO GOOD" said granny. "GIMMI BACK THE TAFFY" said the kid. "Can someone help me.." Said the principal. "NO" said the kid. Grandpa then threw more Sues on him. "Ohhhhhh it hurts" said the principal. "We are done with the homework" said the kids. "HERE. FIND WHAT EINSTEIN'S EQUATION WAS" said grandpa. "WELL EINSTEINS DUMB HE DOESN'T KNOW ANYTHING! ANYTHING YOU HEAR ME!" Said the kid. "Then what's 1 plus 1?" Said grandpa. "11." Said the kid. "Wrong, what is your name?" Said grandpa. "My name is kid." Said the kid. "WRONG!" Said grandpa. "Then what is it?" "Mr Oatie Flake mcbland the 114567284629362937882947294629848929373892837838326739372729th King Jr Jr." Said grandpa. "No wonder everyone calls me kid." Said the kid. "And what gender am I?" Said the kid. ""Your gender is *************." (Blocked because nobody knows kids gender.)When Mr Oatie Flake mcbland the114567284629362937882947294629848929373892837838326739372729th King Jr Jr was a baby, Mr Oatie Flake mcbland the 11456728462936293788294729462
9848929373892837838326739372729th King Jr Jr hated the name Mr Oatie Flake mcbland the 114567284629362937882947294629848929373892837838326739372729th King Jr Jr so he cried and shot grandpa then went to pizza hut and ordered extra anchovies and shoved the anchovies in grandpas throat who puffed up and was alive again. "UGH I HATE ANCHOVIES" said grandpa. But grandpa was mad. "I am mad young man." Said grandpa. "No your not" said the kid. The kid brainwashed grandpa. "I meant, I am a fish" said grandpa. Grandpa then turned into a fish. "IT'S A FISH! LETS EAT IT" said the kids. "No. I am a dog." Said grandpa. Grandpa turned into a dog. "YAY CLASS PET" said the kids. "Uhh.. I am Yee." Said grandpa. "PA PA PA PAA PAA PA PO PA PAW PAW PA PA PA PAA PA PA PA PA PA POP-" said the kids. "Yee" said grandpa. "AN EXTINCT ANIMAL" said the kids. "No. I am air." Said grandpa. One kid starts to breathe in the grandpa air. The grandpa air went into one of the kid's body. "NOOOOO WAIT I AM AN ELEPHANT" said grandpa. Grandpa turned into an elephant. That one kid sadly exploded. R.I.P. Kid that we never knew. Born: June 19 2110 Died: Somewhere in the stone ages. "Eh. Whatever. That kid died." Said grandpa. Granny kept eating all the taffy. "THAT'S IT. I'M MAD" said kid. "Stop being so sassy" said granny. "I'M NOT SASSY GRANNY" said the kid. "Yes you are you just don't know it" said granny. "I. AM. NOTTTT" said the kid. "I'm going to run away now" said granny. "NO. YOU COME BACK HERE RIGHT NOW YOUNG LADY" said the kid. "I'm not old anymore?" Said granny. "Yes you are" said the kid. Alf walked over. "I am Alf. It is true granny. You are old." Said Alf. "WHAT IS ALF" said the kid. "My pet alien" said granny. "OMG OMG I WANT IT BECAUSE IT IS UGLY" said the kid. "Neva" said granny. "GIMME NOW IT LOOKS LIKE A ELEPHANT" said the kid. "RUN ALF RUN" said granny. "I am running with this monkey that keeps saying no" said Alf. "NO NO NO" said Boots. Boots kicked Alf. "YES YES YES" said Alf. "NOO NOO NOO" said Boots. "YEESS YEESS YEESS" said Alf. Alf kicked Boots. Boots got really mad. And you don't want to make Boots that mad. Or you die. "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO" said Boots. Boots poked Alf. "What the.." Said Alf. Boots poked more and more. "UGHHH STOP POKING ME" said Alf. Boots poked more. "STOOOOOOP" said Alf. Suddenly, Alfs skin was coming off. There was an actor under the costume. "NO" said Boots. Boots kicked the actor all the way to the sun. "NO" said Boots. "ALFF NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO" said granny. Boots walked over to granny. "NO" said Boots. Boots kicked granny in the knee. "MY KNEE! OK THAT'S IT YOUNG MONKEY. YOU ARE DONE." Said granny. "I am not young. I am 8393.4 years old." Said Boots. "YEAH RIGHT" said granny. "My birthday is July 28, 1213." Said Boots. "Wow. WHATEVER OLD MONKEY" said granny. "I am not old. I was born August 14, 2386." said Boots. "SO HOW OLD ARE YOU?" said granny. "I can never age." said Boots. "THEN WHY DO YOU EXIST" said granny. "Because you are going to get kicked" said Boots. Boots kicked granny in the knee again. "OOOOOOOOOO OOOOOO OOOO AHH" said granny. "Everyone is a monkey" said Boots. Everyone turned into a monkey. "OMG HELP EVOLUTION IS HAPPENING AGAIN BUT BACKWARDS" said granny. Boots ran over to granny and super kicked her. She flew to Narnia and killed the lion. And they lived happily ever after. Just kidding they hated themselves. Back where grandpa and the kids were, kicking all the Sues. "My name is Sue" said Sue. "My name is also Sue" said Sue. "My name is also Sue" said Sue. "My name is also Sue" said Sue. "My name is also Sue" said Sue. "My name is also Sue" said Sue. "My name is also Sue" said Sue. "My name is also Sue" said Sue. "My name is also Sue" said Sue. "My name is also Sue" said Sue. "My name is also Sue" said Sue. "My name is also Sue" said Sue. "My name is also Sue" said Sue. "My name is also Sue" said Sue. "My name is also Sue" said Sue. "My name is also Sue" said Sue. "My name is also Sue" said Sue. "My name is also Sue" said Sue. "My name is also Sue" said Sue. "My name is also Sue" said Sue. "My name is also Sue" said Sue. "My name is also Sue" said Sue. "My name is also Sue" said Sue. "My name is also Sue" said Sue. "My name is also Sue" said Sue. "My name is also Sue" said Sue. "My name is also Sue" said Sue. "My name is also Sue" said Sue. "My name is also Sue" said Sue. "My name is also Sue" said Sue. "My name is also Sue" said Sue. "My name is also Sue" said Sue. "My name is also Sue" said Sue. "My name is also Sue" said Sue. "My name is also Sue" said Sue. "My name is also Sue" said Sue. "My name is also Sue" said Sue. "My name is also Sue" said Sue. "My name is also Sue" said Sue. "My name is also Sue" said Sue. "My name is also Sue" said Sue. "My name is also Sue" said Sue. "My name is also Sue" said Sue. "My name is also Sue" said Sue. "My name is also Sue" said Sue. "My name is also Sue" said Sue. "My name is also Sue" said Sue. "My name is also Sue" said Sue. "My name is also Sue" said Sue. "My name is also Sue" said Sue. "My name is also Sue" said Sue. "My name is also Sue" said Sue. "My name is also Sue" said Sue. "My name is also Sue" said Sue. "My name is also Sue" said Sue. "My name is also Sue" said Sue. "My name is also Sue" said Sue. "My name is also Sue" said Sue. "My name is also Sue" said Bart. "My name is also Sue" said Sue otherwise known as Bart. "My name is also Sue" said Sue. "SHUT UP" said the kid and nuked the whole world. "WHAT KIND OF BEDTIME STORY IS THAT?!" Said the kid. "A really good bedtime story, son." Said grandpa. "IT'S NOT A STORY" said the kid. "More Fover?" Said grandpa. "YES!" Said the kid. "Ok. Fover is a fan girl. Fover was going to the Thomas the train concert. "I'm going to go see Thomas omg omg" said Fover. Fover's mom drove him to the concert. Thomas the train drove up. "Today is the concert! Joining us is Elmo!" Said Thomas the train. Elmo came up on stage. "BOOOO" said Fover. "YOU MONSTER" said someone else. Someone then shot Elmo. Elmo fell off stage. "Well I guess no special guest!" Said Thomas the train. Then he started singing a song. "Elmo might be gone.. But we are still together!" Said Thomas the train. Elmo got off the floor. "I'm not dead!" Said Elmo. "AHHHHHHHHHHHHH ZOMBIE" said Thomas the train. Everyone started screaming. Thomas the train got out a gun and repeatedly shot Elmo. "IM ALIVE IM ALIVE" said Elmo. "ZOMBIE" said Thomas the train. Then his brother Thomas the tank came up and blew all the guts out of Elmo. After the concert ended, Fover went home. "That was a good concert." Said Fover in a squeaky squirrel voice. "WHAT KIND OF BEDTIME STORY IS THAT?!" Said the kid. "A really good bedtime story, son." Said grandpa. "IT'S NOT A STORY" said the kid. "WHAT KIND OF BEDTIME STORY IS THAT?!" Said the kid. "A really good bedtime story, son." Said grandpa. "IT WASN'T EVEN A STORY" said the kid. "I know that." Said grandpa. "YOU'RE MAKING ME MAD GRANDPA." Said the kid. "LOL" said grandpa and shot the kid. Redfoo came out and yelled out "WHO'S READY TO PARTY ROCK?!" Then a bomb came down and killed Redfoo. "BEST BEDTIME STORY EVER!" Said the kid who we don't know the gender of. "I hate Redfoo!" And then the kid was happy.
The end
Jk scroll down for more
The kid will go to sleep.
"WHAT KIND OF BEDTIME STORY IS THAT?!" Said the kid. "A horrible one." Said grandpa the green squid purple eye thing. "WHAT KIND OF BEDTIME STORY IS THAT?!" Said the kid. A GOOD BEDTIME STORY SON. "C==3 tastes good!" Said Fover because he's gay. Anyways the kid killed grandpa. Just kidding. "WHAT KIND OF BEDTIME STORY IS THAT?!" Said the kid. "A really good bedtime story, son." Said grandpa. "IT'S NOT A STORY" said the kid. The kid took grandpa and drowned him in the toilet. "BUBBLE BUBLE BLUBBERING BLUBBER BUBBLE" said grandpa, drowning. "WHAT KIND OF BEDTIME STORY IS THAT?! But it was really good because you died." Said the kid. "A really good bedtime story, son." Said grandpa. "IT'S NOT A STORY" said the kid. The kid took grandpa by the head and ripped it off. Red streamer blew out of grandpa. The kid threw grandpa's body and head out the window into a deep void which was a black hole that disposed the evidence. "WHAT KIND OF BEDTIME STORY IS THAT?!" Said the kid. "A really good bedtime story, son." Said grandpa. "IT'S NOT A STORY" said the kid. The kid put grandpa in a bus of orphan children. "Hi" said a orphan. "Hi" said a orphan. "Hi" said a orphan. "Hi" said a orphan. "Hi" said a orphan. "Hi" said a orphan. "Hi" said a orphan. "Hi" said a orphan. "Hi" said a orphan. "Hi" said a orphan. "Hi" said a orphan. "Hi" said a orphan. "Hi" said a orphan. "Hi" said a orphan. "Hi" said a orphan. "Hi" said a orphan. "Hi" said a orphan. "Hi" said a orphan. "Hi" said a orphan. "Hi" said a orphan. "Hi" said a orphan. "Hi" said a orphan. "Hi" said a orphan. "Hi" said a orphan. "Hi" said a orphan. "Hi" said a orphan. "Hi" said a orphan. "Hi" said a orphan. "Hi" said a orphan. "Hi" said a orphan. "Hi" said a orphan. "Hi" said a orphan. "Hi" said a orphan. "Hi" said a orphan. "Hi" said a orphan. "Hi" said a orphan. "Hi" said a orphan. "Hi" said a orphan. "Hi" said a orphan. "Hi" said a orphan. "Hi" said a orphan. "Hi" said a orphan. "Hi" said a orphan. "Hi" said a orphan. "Hi" said a orphan. "Hi" said a orphan. "Hi" said a orphan. "Hi" said a orphan. "Hi" said a orphan. "Hi" said a orphan. "Hi" said a orphan. "Hi" said a orphan. "Hi" said a orphan. "Hi" said a orphan. "Hi" said a orphan. "Hi" said a orphan. "Hi" said a orphan. "Hi" said a orphan. "Hi" said a organ. "Wait why is there a organ? ALSO WHY ARE ALL OF YOU SO ANNOYING" Said grandpa. Grandpa was so annoyed that he killed all of them. "LOL" said grandpa. "LOL" said the kid. The kid pulled out an RPG and shot grandpa and grandpa blew up. "WHAT KIND OF BEDTIME STORY IS THAT?!" Said the kid. "A really good bedtime story, son." Said grandpa. "IT'S NOT A STORY" said the kid. The kid went online and put grandpa on the black market. Some guy thought it was 'something else' on the black market and bought grandpa. He got mad because he didn't get his drugs. So he threw grandpa at the computer and the grandpa exploded into bits and pieces then Dora said, "Hola senior." Then Dora exploded into confetti. Then the kid said "Bloody hell." "WHAT KIND OF BEDTIME STORY IS THAT?!" Said the kid. "A really good bedtime story, son." Said grandpa. "IT'S NOT A STORY" said the kid took grandpa by the head and chopped it off. The kid took grandpa's head and planted it. Then a random smiling pie came andblew up the earth. Hillary Clinton died because of Donald Trump. . . . I have no clue anymore then sue came and exploded into North Korea then Donald trump came and said "Bing Bing bong" then there was a clink clank in the corner Pluto exploded and Sue army came and exploded into a big breakfast be with you! "WHAT KIND OF BEDTIME STORY IS THAT?!" Said the kid. "A really good bedtime story, son." Said grandpa. "IT'S NOT A STORY" said the kid. The kid pulled out his phone and took pictures of grandpa. But when he opened his phone he got this. And the phone exploded all over the grandpa poster he had on his wall. Also the kid turned into a female monkey. And then a giant man face came out and killed Billy mays then the kid had a seizure. The kid checked the black market but this popped up.
"My phone is so slow" said the kid. The kid threw his phone on the ground and broke it. Then he gave it to a homeless man. "WHAT KIND OF BEDTIME STORY IS THAT?!" Said the kid. "A really good bedtime story, son." Said grandpa. "IT'S NOT A STORY" said the kid. The kid threw grandpa at a ant. "I am ant" said the ant before it was squashed by grandpa. The ant used his knife and stabbed grandpa 1,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000. Times and then sue came and employed the kid at McDonald's and Burger King. Then the kids brother came and flew up in mid air really tho that physics XD
ಠ_ಠ Hi
ಠ_ಠ Kid The kid will go to sleep.
ಠ_ಠ give me your phone.
ಠ_ಠ Now!
(°□°) ಠ_ಠ my name is sue xD
"WHAT KIND OF BEDTIME STORY IS - But then the kid awoke. "What happened?" Said the kid. The kid looked over his room and saw only darkness and couldn't see grandpa anywhere. "Where am I?" said the kid. "You are in the hospital." Said a man. "Who are you?" Said the kid. "I am your roommate, Fover. Your grandpa died today." Said Fover. "Why does the text look different? Stuff is getting weird now," said the kid. "It's always been this way. It's life," said Fover, "Life is hard. It's not weird." "STOP TALKING LIKE THAT FOVER I KNOW YOU HAVE BIG NIPPLES" said McOaty Flakes. "Shhh be quiet," said Fover. "STOP THIS IS A JOKE" said McOaty Flakes. "YES IT IS" said Fover. "Ahahhahahaahahhahahahahahahah!" Said the kid. "WHAT KIND OF BEDTIME STORY IS THAT?!" Said the kid. "A really good bedtime story, son." Said grandpa. "IT'S NOT A STORY" said the kid. Then Kenny from South Park came and killed grandpa. "Oh my god! He killed grandpa!" Said the kid. "You bastard!" Said Fover. "WHAT KIND OF BEDTIME STORY IS THAT?!" Said the kid. "A really good bedtime story, son." Said grandpa. "IT'S NOT A STORY" said the kid. But then, Gandalf Bergamot came out of nowhere and killed the kid. "Oooooooooo" said the kid. The kid died. Too bad.
FIN