Title: Always
Author: Monique
Disclaimer: I don't own Chris Jericho or Lita
Notes: Takes place after the 11/8/2004 episode of Raw. On Chris's highlight reel with Lita, Trish, and Snitsky who interrupted.
He felt responsible.
As he made his way through the hallways of the hotel and the people staring at him, he couldn't help but clench his fists in anger. He hadn't meant for her to get hurt. He hadn't meant for her self-esteem and mental health to be even more damaged than it already was. But dammit, when he had seen that replay and seen her cowering in that corner, that look of despair, fear, and hurt in her eyes….he needed to find her. He had called her out there to begin with. He had hoped to give her an outlet, another way to stand up to Trish for all the nasty things she had said and done…and she had been doing so well. He had seen that spark in her eye again, that fire, that passion….and Snitsky ruined it. The bastard was going to pay for the turmoil he had caused her tonight. He had taken it too far tonight. That baby…god damn that baby….
He stopped as he reached the door with her name on it, fearful of what he had find on the other side. He tried to calm himself down, control his anger just a bit before knocking. Lord knew he wasn't upset with her.
"Li?"
His voice was soft and concerned as he knocked on the door, praying beyond anything that she would open up for him.
When he got no response he knocked again. "Come on li, baby, it's me….it's just Chris honey. I just want to talk to you."
He waited a few more seconds, fear rising in him at the silence he was being greeted with. Why wasn't she answering him?
"Please open the door Li….please just let me in baby girl…." He pleaded, relief flooding through his body when he heard the lock click. He gently opened the door, his eyes scanning the room and immediately falling on the redheaded woman sitting against the wall, her knees drawn up to her chest, her head buried into her knees.
"Oh sweetheart…." He murmured, falling to his knees beside her. He went to place his arm on her shoulder, frowning when she flinched away from him.
"Just go away Chris. Please just…" her voice was broken off by a choked up sob and Chris sighed, unsure of what to do. She clearly wasn't going to let him touch her….
"Honey, I just want to help you. You're hurting…." He whispered and she shook her head rather violently, shoving herself away from him, stumbling away from him, crashing into the dresser and whimpering in pain as she fell over, doubling over once more as her heartbroken sobs took control. It was then that Chris looked around the room, surveying the mess that the young woman seemed to have made, bed sheets thrown around the room, clothing thrown in anger….
He shook his head, returning his attention back to the broken girl in front of him. She was gasping for air at this point, her body shaking wildly. He reached out once more, ignoring her attempts to get away as he grabbed her, holding her tightly against him. She struggled with what little strength she had left, pushing and shoving, barely able to breathe as she tried to get away. He held her tighter, waiting her struggles out as he began to rock her back and forth.
"Let it out baby. Just let it all out baby girl," he crooned, his hand stroking her hair and back as her struggles lessened. She let out a weak whimper, giving in and allowing her body to collapse against Chris, giving in to the comfort he offered….
"I m-m-miss m-my b-b-b-baby b-boy!" she cried, choking again and he leaned in close to her ear, allowing the rocking motion to soothe her.
"I know sweetie. I know. I'm sorry. I'm so, so sorry angel. You did nothing to deserve this pain," he whispered into her ear, tightening his grip on her, wanting so badly to stop the shaking.
"It wasn't his fault! He didn't do anything wrong! He was so in-in-in-" she choked on her own tears, unable to finish her sentence and Chris rubbed his hand down her back once more.
"Just calm down honey. Try and breathe. Focus on your breathing," he whispered, tilting her head to meet his eyes and she nodded, swallowing hard, trying to catch her breath…
He continued to quietly coach her, noting the paleness in her skin. God, how long had she been like this before he got here….
"Why does it hurt so much Chris?" she whispered, her voice hoarse from the amount of crying she'd been doing. He guided her head back to his shoulder, frowning at the question. "I wish I had an answer sweetie. It's okay for it to hurt though. It's okay to be sad. I'm sorry about tonight. I didn't know…." His voice trailed off and she nodded.
"I know," she said simply, her fingers tracing the patterns of his shirt. He smiled a bit as he heard a small yawn escape her lips.
"Tired?" he asked and she nodded against his chest, closing her eyes.
"Come on then. Let's get you to bed," he whispered, pulling her up with him. She whimpered again as he guided her over to the bed, easing her onto the unkempt bed.
"I'm sorry for the mess," she whispered and he shook his head, grabbing the covers from across the room and tucking her in as if she were a child.
"Don't worry about it honey," he said, leaning down to place a kiss to her forehead.
"Chris…" her voice trailed off and he sent her a small reassuring smile.
"Li?" he allowed his hand to trace over the tear stains on her cheek, hating how small she looked in the bed.
"Will you stay with me? Please…I…I don't want to-
He cut he off, placing his fingers to her lips.
"Always honey. I'll always be here for you," he whispered, watching as her eyes slowly closed, her hand clutching his much larger one.
"I love you," he whispered, assuming she was asleep. He looked at her in surprise when he heard her small voice cut through the silence of the room.
"Love you too Chris."