A/N: I DID NOT create this. Rather input some words in a drabble generator. I couldn't help but laugh my ass off while reading this.
The generator turned freakin' Bruce Wayne into a WOMAN. *passes out laughing*
Disclaimer: DC Comics, I'm so sorry. I made a fem Bat. *laughs* You own him now.
Bruce tripped along elegantly. He was on his way to meet his lover, Wally, for Valentine's Day. He smiled to see a tiger hopping along, carrying an aftermath in its mouth.
Bruce was almost at a standstill when he came across a discreet cake, lying alone on an ignorant plate. "That must be a treat from my shy bear," he said to himself, and tripped over to it. The cake looked heavenly, so he ate it.
It gave him the most familiar tingling sensation in his hand. "How unusual!" he said and continued tripping to see Wally.
When Wally came out to meet him, he took one look and fell over.
"What is it?" Bruce cried stealthily.
"Your chest! And your wrist!" Wally said. "They're abrasive! Can't you feel it?"
Bruce felt his chest and his wrist. They were indeed quite abrasive. "Oh, no!" Bruce said. "I'm a woman!" He, or rather, she started to cry. "It must have been that discreet cake you left for me. Did you know what it would do?"
"I didn't leave you any cake," Wally said. "I got you a memory. It must have been that bashful man who lives nearby. He acts a little carefully, ever since he tossed an iron."
"But how can you ever love me, now that I'm a woman?" Bruce sobbed.
"Well, I never knew how to tell you this," Wally said finally, "but I actually prefer women. And I think your chest is really malicious like that."
"Really?" Bruce dried her tears. Bruce kissed Wally and it was an entirely glistening sensation, like a passion of a thousand hearts burning in his soul.
They spent the night having entirely glistening sex, until the cake wore off suddenly.
Everything was rather awkward after that.