Disclaimer. We don't own Death Note. We don't own Jay. We own everything else.
Near's Last Salad
One day, Jay was trying to open Near's salad. But it was closed. "Dang it!" He shouted. He wanted to contaminate Near's food.
With his germy, grummy, I-can't-spell-these-words hands. And possibly some hydrofluoric acid straight from N. Korea.
So next Jay spit in Near's sippy cup full of orange juice. White orange juice. Because everything had to be white or Near would lose his super genius powers.
He died (get cuz im goof and liek deaf) Near's orange juice orange. Ha! Haha! He then cut open Near's (wrist) salad and put the deathdly stuff inside. It would be hilarious! The salad is sealed again.
Then Near popped up and popped his sippy cup in his mouth.
Blarg! Near said with disgust and regret. If only he had noticed it was orange! His super genius gone forever, he was reduced to the state of a super idiot! LOLOL.
If only he wasn't so old man! Near cried blood from his eyes. Poisonous blood.
It got all over his already dead salad. Then he ate it. It was Near's last salad.
The End