A/N: Hello! smiles like a maniac Wow I am so excited!!! This is my first fan fic!! cheers I really hope that you'll read it and leave a review for me. I even except Flames, which just shows how desperate I am for my fic to get attention. " Ahh well. Lets get on with the Show!
Shippers
: Remus/Lily, Lily/James, Sirius/lots of other girls.Rating
: Will be R but don't judge on appearances. It'll be PG-13 for a long time.Disclaimer
: I don't own Harry Potter. If I did, why would I be writing on Fan fiction? I would be writing the 6th book by now. Sorry, I'm babbling. Just don't sue.Special Note
: This is going to be very angst, in case you can't read well and didn't see the genre. When I say angst, I mean angst! I suppose this could be classified as an AU, but I dun know. You be the judge.My blood was pumping fast. It was the full moon night, and Madame Pomfrey's hand on my shoulder was becoming unbearable. I wanted human flesh, needed to bite her, and it was all I could do not to attack her. When the urges became to powerful however, I tensed and brushed her hand off of me. Madame Pomfrey understood though. She knew that the cravings inside of me would win out if she kept on.
"Go ahead Remus." The stern nurse stated kindly. "I'll watch you from here."
Nodding, I prodded the knot on the Womping Willow with the long branch, and slipped between the frozen branches. The tunnel below was cold and dank as always, but it seemed less so today. James, Sirius, and Peter had finally finished their Animagus training and would be joining me tonight.
The thought of company, however pleasant, made my stomach twist into knots. They would see how violent and feral I was. They would see me transforming, and hear me scream as my bones rearranged themselves. What would they think? How could I know that they wouldn't abandon me once they saw how dangerous I was? Maybe they would finally realize how dangerous it was to be my friend.
I had to physically shake the thought from my head. They wouldn't abandon my. They had all gone through the trouble of becoming animagus' for me, they wouldn't leave know.
I tried desperately to calm myself. I couldn't transform if I was distraught. Being agitated, stressed, angry, or depressed made the transformation about 10 times worse. I couldn't let James, Sirius, and Peter see me when I was like that. I didn't want to hurt them.
I was about half way through my relaxation exercises, when a loud thunk penetrated the silence. Suddenly the door opened, and out fell Peter.
Laughing, I said, "Pete? You ok there mate?"
"Yeah, Sirius just pushed me." Peter replied, grinning nervously.
Looking up at the door expectantly, I saw Sirius and James appear out from under James' invisibility cloak, smirking broadly. Extending a hand to Peter, Sirius helped him off of the floor and looked over to me.
"Hey Remus, you ok so far? Are you going to transform soon?" Sirius asked in his loud, yet calm voice. Trust Sirius to be calm while stuck in a room with a werewolf.
"It's the full moon you prat." Came James's raucous voice. "How do you think he's going to look?"
Sirius gave James a mock glare. "I was just asking. What the hell else am I supposed to ask?"
James was a bout to respond, when I suddenly went stiff. "Transform!" I ordered in a hoarse voice.
Sirius looked concerned, but did as he was told after I yelled, "Now! Do it now!" It was a good thing that he, for once, followed instructions. I doubt I could have prolonged the transformation any longer.
My body was bathed in the pale moon light, and my arms began to tremble. My eyes went wide as the shaking carried through my body until it became difficult for me to stand. Pain soon followed the tremors, and I bit my tongue as a particularly sharp jab shot through my body. Not being able to contain it any longer, I threw back my head and screamed.
I could feel my bones snapping and cracking, rearranging themselves as the werewolf in me took over. My muscles tore apart and my nerves were on fire. I fell to the floor and screamed as my spine snapped moved. My fingernails were elongating and hair sprouting all over my body.
My hands changed to wolf paws, and the nails sharpened to a deadly point. I shrieked as my muscles and bones started coming back together, and started trembling again as the transformation came to a close. I rose to my four feet and looked over to my three new companions. I could smell their fear, but Remus was gone by this point. As Moony took full control, I howled my anguish to scarred ceiling, and gave in to my counterpart's needs. Moony was free once more.
()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()
I seen the results of remus's transformations before, and heard vague details that he had accidentally let slip, but I had never thought it was this bad.
I was just going to talk to James when Remus suddenly went stiff. His eyes were wide with terror as he told us to transform. We all changed at his insistence, but were all deeply worried for our friend. I could tell from Peter's lack of squeaking and James' lack of movement, that they were in the same terrible awe that I was.
Remus's body had begun to violently tremble and shake, his eyes going, if possible, wider then before. He had told us what to expect, but I knew that what I saw would stay with me forever.
Remus, Moony, whoever was standing before me, had begun to scream and writhe in such a way, that you would think he was being tortured. His body had begun to convulse, and you could hear the bones snapping in his body. Hair had begun to grow all over his body and his nails grew longer.
It pained me to see my friend in such obvious agony. I wanted to help him, wanted to stop this incredibly undue anguish. I probably would have too if James hadn't stopped me. I looked over to see his tall brown antlers pointed at me, and his eyes sent me a silent message. 'Leave him alone. We can't help him.'
It was unfair, but true. There was nothing I could do for my friend, even if I desperately wanted to help. I began to feel physically sick as I realized that Remus did this twice every month. He was subjected to this torture every moon cycle, and had done nothing to deserve it.
I was pulled from my horrified musings as the ghastly screams suddenly ceased. I looked up to see that my friend, Remus Lupin, had now changed into a full fledged 6 foot tall werewolf.
I stared in trepidation and in completely unchecked awe at the magnificent and horrifying beast that stood before me. The wolf had long and grizzled silver fur, and paws the size of full grown mans hand. The powerful muscles flexed and rippled under the shining fur, and those eerie amber eyes that belonged to Remus and Remus alone stared over at the three of us, practically cowering in the corner. It seemed as though our fear amused him, and he lifted his head and gave a long mournful howl to ceiling. Then I knew Remus was gone and Moony was awake.
??????????????????????????
I watched from Moony's eyes as James, Sirius, and Peter attempted to shake themselves from a stupor. They were terrified, I could tell. There fear of me laid heavy in the air and assaulted my senses. Moony was delighted by this, misinterpreting it to mean respect, but I knew. They thought I was a monster. They were afraid.
Moony padded over to my friends, and sniffed the air surrounding them. I had told them not to be afraid or Moony would sense it, but it seems that they were oblivious to my instructions. Moony was analyzing them, looking for potential pack mates. If they refused to walk up to Moony and look him in the eye, he would attack, and there would be nothing I could do about it.
Finally, after what felt like hours, James stood up to his fullest height and walked over to Moony. Inwardly I rejoiced. Perhaps I wouldn't be forced to attack my only friends. James stared into my eyes with his warm hazel ones, and I could feel Moony's acceptance. I breathed a sigh of relief. Now if only the other two would mimic him.
Moony's eyes left James and settled on Sirius. The great black dog, encouraged by James' success, clambered to his four shaggy feet and walked hesitantly over to Moony. Their gazes locked, glowing amber and brilliant blue stared into each other for several moments. Moony watched Sirius longer then he did James, but accepted him as a pack member and let his gaze slip to the rat on the floor.
Anyone, animal or human, could tell that Peter was terrified of Moony. His tiny body had begun to tremble slightly and tiny, almost incoherent, squeaks began to issue from him. I could feel Moony's unease at the thought of accepting Peter as part of the pack. I began to panic. I did everything I could to tell Moony that it was OK, and that the rat was to be let into the pack unharmed.
The longer we mentally jockeyed for control, the more exhausted I became. I wouldn't be able to keep this up for very long. Putting all of my strength into one final attempt, I felt Moony give way under my rebellion, and I let Peter pass by unscathed.
I let Moony take control without any resistance. I was simply to fatigued to fight him any longer. The wolf inside of me had always been stronger, and I could never fight it for very long. However now that I was no longer resisting Moony, he took full advantage, and engaged Sirius in a battle for dominance.
Moony had sensed a very strong impression of rebellion in Sirius, and wanted to make sure that he knew who was the alpha male in this pack. As I watched from behind Moony's eyes, I saw that Sirius had been completely taken by surprise, and was roughly knocked onto his back as Moony jumped on him.
I hoped against hope that Sirius would know that I wasn't attacking him. I had mentioned to them that this might happen, but hadn't gone to far into detail. I was praying that Moony would battle any of them, but it seemed as though he thought Sirius would be defiant.
As soon as Sirius was knocked backwards, James tried to stave off the wolf in hope that Sirius would get back. This effort was futile however. Just as James leaped forward, Moony snarled at him, at knocked him back into his place. I silently pleaded with James to take the hint and stay back. I knew for a fact that Moony could take the two of them if he so wished, and I had no desire for my friends to be mortally wounded.
Thankfully, James stayed still after being knocked back, and watched impatiently as Moony and Sirius battled it out. It took a few moments, but Sirius seemed to realize that I was not trying to kill him, and began to fight back. I watched in silence as the two canines fought each other for dominance. After a few more moments of snapping jaws and clawing nails, Sirius caught on to what Moony was doing, and he backed down.
I could feel Moony grin wolfishly, and he leapt away from Sirius, and over onto James. Like Sirius I could sense that James was taken by surprise, but recovered quickly, and started to battle with Moony. James's hard bone antlers dug into Moony's side, and he growled in frustration. I could feel Moony's growing respect for the pair as he battled James, and knew the moment James backed down that he would trust James the stag until death.
Moony didn't even look over at Peter, and looked over at Sirius and James. Both looked winded, and I could see the sweat dripping off of there fur covered bodies. Moony went over and licked the both of them, and my fears were finally put to rest. Moony licking the two animagus' signified that he trusted them, and was allowing them into the pack. Even though he hadn't licked or battled Peter, I could feel that he would accept him as well, however grudgingly.
Moony, Padfoot, and Prongs all wrestled and fought playfully with each other until the Moony could no longer stand for fatigue. Immediately, I could feel my control coming back. The sun must be rising. Moony gave one final swipe at James and Sirius before handing control back over to me. The pink and dim light of the rising sun swept through the room, and our body began to shake. Moony howled as the our bones cracked in two and arrange themselves back into their original form. Our muscles were tearing into pieces, and Moony howled for the agony of it all.
I could feel my human shape returning, and the control of my mind was handed solely over to me as Moony went back to sleep for another month. Moony's grizzled silver fur retracted into my skin, and my hands and nails were restored. I realized that I was on my hands and knees as my bones stopped breaking apart.
As the pain left me, I looked up into the horrified eyes of my friends, and said, "Hey guys." Before letting my nude form fall to the cold wooden floor beneath me, completely unconscious.
A/N: So, what do you guys think? I really hope that you liked it, and will review. I need the reviews, or I might do something stupid. Read,, review, and check out my friend, Anime-crazed33, fic, "Loves Forbidden Fruit." It doesn't get nearly the amount of reviews it should. Well, on that note, REVIEW!
