Izuku Midoriya - July 15th, 2018

by HeidenShayde

After losing his mother, Izuku is desperately trying to figure out ow to survive on his own with his emotions, while still being a part of his friends lives. However, it seems as though life has another plan, when he is found almost dead in the ocean, everyone finally finds out that his mother has been dead and he never told anyone his problems to try and heal.

/ Introductory Note - More and more depressing things are going to be making their way into my stories, man am I a sad person. However, for some suicidal stuff, I guess I am here to try and write something more or less short and sweet. Not long and over used. I know that 'suicidal Izuku' is a common thing in this fandom. But as someone who suffers some suicidal stuff, I can write something to express some personal experiences. My way. Please do not hate on this, I am doing it because it makes me feel better. Reviews and commentary are always appreciated. I am not seeking attention, I am expressing myself in the fandom. I also am not THAT sad, anymore. I do have help now./

What was better than rain? The cold of the water that had once touched the earth returning to where it had been over a million times. A smell of pine and dirt mixed into the air to create a stagnant but pleasant aroma of the mountains. The dampness of the earth below feeling as a damp shirt might to the skin.

Cold.

Was there much else to say, in the end; the events all lead back to the shirt being indescribably lonely and frigid. Almost like his sense of stability. Being as he was, a hero of the matter, he knew he had no time to be selfish. He had no time to just sit here and think about himself when there were others out there who needed him more.

Midoriya, Izuku- Date: July 15, 2018

How were some people able to be so selfish, to let themselves down? The answer might appear simple to some; of course, it depended on who asked the question. While quotes may lead to 'This person never believed in themselves so begin with!' for those who were shallow enough to just look at the surface. For more, the answer was simple. 'They must have just given up.' True as those words could be; there was so much more to them! There was so much more to this world that could be shared. Knowledge that one is not willing to let go to waste.

Then again, what if all of that was just some reasons to cling to life? To let it slip away through the drain and go into the putrid destiny of the sewers.

Another keen fellow might voice out yet another reason, a little bit ways past the surface that the other two might not be able to crack. "Maybe he was willing to let himself go, just because he felt as if he accomplished everything he needed." Such a keep fellow is he. What a clever sport indeed, he must have known a thing or two. However, he was still wrong. The next one, maybe the next one knew for sure! A person might continue to dig; and reveal something the others have yet to find. "If this person was not after self-satisfaction; possibly it could have been for or because of some other person!"

Oh, they were so close. So close to the answer, yet so far off.

A new person stood nearby. The person who had gotten to the bottom of the can he had been given to search. Yet, from there, they continued to dig, even if it meant tearing the bottom of aluminum from it's factory placed confinement.

"Maybe..." the person would start.

The person can take a minute, and think again, what could drive such an action? What could bring one here, to where we are now?

"Maybe... there is not just one thing. Maybe, for some reason, this person may not know. Maybe they are lost, and tried to help themselves be found. Maybe this person was calling for help by helping others. Maybe, just maybe, every laugh was a cry to search for an outstretched hand. Maybe the stomach of the other person rumbled for more than a days worth of hunger; though they were not being starved." another pause, every good story needs to have a pause before it can stop. "Maybe this person was showing up every day and not asking for help, because they thought of more than just themselves. Maybe... just maybe..."

Life was full of decisions. Not every one of them was of your own accord, not every single action was constructed by you. Although you had been the only one to commit in the end. Of course, there was one thing that was clear. A force of life, as you will.

Think about the ocean.

'The ocean does not move on it's own. Something drives it the way that it is bound to go. Be it the tide; be it the creatures that linger below; or be it the contraptions that have been built to traverse the surface.'

One thing will always lead to another.

Every day, someone feels like they are drowning.

Every hour, there are dark thoughts in the world.

And, every 40 seconds, a beautiful person is lost.

In the end, what will you choose?

"I... Don't want to die. " "I can't hold it in." "Why am I so lonely?" "I want friends, but I separate myself from people. I am not afraid of judgement. I'm afraid of abandonment." "Will anyone notice if I am gone?" "Will anyone remember my name the second it no longer has a use?"

"Was I ever IMPORTANT?"

Messy green locks lay over a resting tan face as the aching sun made it's way through the blinds. The pain of the bright obscurity was subject to opinion, as was everything else. However, in the end, it was just a light. The weather outside never bent to your emotions, you just viewed it the way it seemed at the time. Even after that, eventually the weather too will stop responding to your pain with the dull clouds and everlasting drops of water that followed such emotion.

Green eyes made their way to the light of the room, once being concealed by the shade of the eyelids and all they were able to provide to the superior force of light. The evergreen shade was so light in the rays of warmth. Giving them a pleasant tint.

Looking up to the ceiling of the room, the boy had seen a date for the millionth time this month. Even though it was just 15 days in, it had made itself evident, once again showing the bold phantom of his birthday to him. Today was it, the date that had made itself so prominent. The name that tagged along with it all this time.

Midoriya, Izuku - July 15, 2018

Sitting up, the boy got away from the phantom literature, just a moment of not seeing it was nice. The hero-in-training sliding on his school uniform and shoes. Most times, he and his fellow class members would not be going to the school on a day such as this. A Sunday of all days. However, it was required. Not for the business as usual type of thing, but for the enjoyment that the day was sure to lead to.

A day for the fun and lack of strain that brought itself with the class of 1-A. Though for them and their paths in life, pleasantly enough it had lead the students to be rather jubilant. There was so much for life to offer and here they were, taking it all in with the bitterness and cloying of their entirety. However that still left room for the saccharine or otherwise pleasantries tied in with their breath. Every step was an adventure, and every breath was another set of seconds that one had lived to tell their tale or and help others with their own.

The green haired boy walked down the hallway as he made his way to the front door of his home, the house being as empty as it was for the last month. Maybe more, if he had been careless enough to have lost track of time. The kitchen was sparsely used, and the living room no longer had the cassette of the recorder and baskets of tissues as there had been in the sports festival.

There was no use for this room anymore after all. There was no point on sitting on the lavender hued couch anymore. There was no use for that television. There was no need for the never-ending echoes of happy crying and good memories that echoed in their own midst here.

Everything in this room was now old and abandoned, like most other rooms in the house had become after some time.

There stood a lone paper on the wall, next to a still-standing picture on a shelf with a pretty lavender kiku and burning orange-red hued tsubaki sitting idly but well watered off to the side. Alongside that, there was a green jar with a lid on it, clear in color. The jar itself had some ashes on the inside as it's contents. A green and pink pot was the object that the flowers stood in, it had a crack going down one of the sides. Not monumental, by any means, it served its sign well.

The clay decorative containment for the flora had small hearts going around the outer circumference. Lightly accompanying the otherwise lonely smoothness of the clay pot. The crack had run itself down one of the hearts in the front of the pot, and made it seem as it if was MEANT to be as broken as it appeared.

"Mom... I miss you..." he whispered. For the many times he had seen her smile there before, he always said goodbye to the beautiful woman that supported him. "I love you my beautiful boy, Izuku!" to the woman that was protective of him. "I'm sorry, I can't take this any longer! Please come home!" to the woman that blamed herself for things she could never help. "Izuku, baby, I am so sorry!" to the woman that shed her tears for the boy and told him how special he was every single day. "I love you, Izuku. Mommy loves you so much..."

The boy looks up the wall, and processed the date that was printed under the name of his mother.

' Midoriya, Inko - July 4th, 1954 - June 3rd, 2018 '

"I love you too, mom." with that, the boy willed himself to leave his house and got on the train that took him to his school. The day was passing by so slowly. It was amazing that he had managed to keep the information of his mother passing away from the school. His mothers departure was so sudden, even for her own age. She ended up having a stroke in the middle of the night. Passing away in her sleep. She knew it too, she knew it was coming.

In the end, she was never buried among the grass and other bodies that lay to rest in the lonely and cold ground that commonly held hold to the departed of the living people that had all been lost in times past. Just like her...

There she was, in that translucent jar that sit behind its glory on the shelf in his living room. One that was sparsely traversed through anymore, unless needed.

"No! Now is not the time for that... Izuku. Come on, you and your friends are going to the beach today, that's fun. You can have fun, and allow yourself to relax!" the green haired boy smiled to himself before letting some of the tears fall down his cheeks from the stress he was feeling. He was always allowed willing to let them feel their joy or help them with their pain. He himself, he was not worth it. Them however, they were, they were worth everything to him. After all, they were all he had left.

Once again, there was the flashing of the infamous date that he had forever in his head.

Midoriya, Izuku - July 15, 2018

There was a sense of dread falling into the green haired boys stomach, however he ignored it. He brushed past the pain in his stomach. The pain in his heart, and the pain in his unsettled mind. Was there meant to be relief in the restlessness that he felt? Or was it going to be like this forever?

The teen walked over to the doors of the school and brought the door open with a sigh to himself, his eyes were downcast. The only person who was not going to be there today was Kacchan. The blonde, foul-mood inclined teen was currently in another part of japan with his mother and father. They were all visiting someone in the family that was ill and decided to stay there for a while, being as they were needed. The red-eyed teen was going to be back in a few days.

Now that he thought about it, he had never told them about his mothers passing. That was one thing less that they needed to have knowledge of, they already had a family member in ailment, he didn't need to inform Miss Mitsuki that her best friend was now.. gone. What was that going to do to all of them? It was going to destroy Miss Mitsuki when she found out... why does breaking such hard information have to be so hard all of the time?

Making his way down the corridors was quite easily enough lonesome. His seemingly abandoned shadow drifting along the tile that lay on the ground with a solemn glide to the outstretched walls. The form itself taking the time to travel to where it heeded the light that produced such unstable imagery.

The joy of speaking outstretched itself to the freckled boys ears as he continued his walk, and soon turned a corner to place a face with the source. It was the blonde-haired boy Monoma, whom was chatting with the ever famous Shinsou. Both of them were dating now, having known each other for a while to say the least. Unlike the orange haired girl from Monoma's class though, Shinsou got the former ego-maniac to calm himself down.

"Midoriya? It's been a while, but why are you just wandering the halls? Your class are all sitting in their room talking to Aizawa-Sensei right now." the ever-tired teen looked his friend in the eyes, seeing an all-too-familiar expression. Pure emotional exhaustion. Of course, to others who never really payed attention, emotional exhaustion and general tiredness both would have looked exactly the same. Being one who suffered from both at points in his life, he knew the signs to each from the inside out. Before thinking of anything else, he questioned the boy in front of himself and gave a stern look to him all the while.

"Midoriya, what's the matter? You seem upset."

The successor of the greatest hero of course found himself caught off-guard by the blunt question, it was almost like getting reality slapped into his face.

Of course, the other failed to respond. He knew how the other's quirk worked. If he answered him, than the mind control could be used. But otherwise he knew that the purple haired teen did his best not to use it, being as Midoriya was one of the people in the whole school that he respected the most as a person and an ally.

Midoriya smiled at the other a little, before just walking around him and getting ready to turn to head to his classroom again. Before he was able to get away though, a more firm hand loosely wrapped around his arm and pulled a little. Looking back, the green haired hero-in-training saw his friend again, looking at him in a more concerned manner, his purple eyebrows knit together in concentration.

Before the other was able to say anything though, his eyes widened as he pulled his arm back and looked at the other in shock. The green haired teen looked confused before looking down and walking away. He didn't really react to the event, which was surprising. Usually, he would have made a move or even scolded whoever it was for a good second or two.

The last thing he processed before he completely vanished around the corner was the fact that Monoma was helping the other get back into a proper standing position before he asked him clearly. "Shin- are you alright?"

None of his own business, why dwell on it?

After another couple minutes of walking, Midoriya reached the classroom door and knocked to be let into the room where all of his friends were standing. "There you are Midoriya! We were wondering where you went, what kept you so long?" the tall blunette class president was looking down to his green haired friend, more or less filled with concerns that were not easily rendered idle with comforting thoughts.

"Sorry Iida-kun. When I got on my train to get here, It was delayed by the crash over the rails. I apologize sincerely for being late." Midoriya bowed to the other in the typical respective manner as he sighed a little in the others worry. He was always concerned, then again, he did have a reason to be.

"Midoriya, we are all here preparing for the day at the beach. However, we have everything we need with us already. Do you mind doing an errand in town and meeting us at the beach in a while?" Yaoyorozu looked up from her notepad as she crossed things off the list. The various markings becoming hard to decipher due to the rather large obtrusion going over them. The green haired teen was able to figure out a few things that were on the list that had not been tainted with the new line yet. Stuff such as soda, and some specifically requested snacks that were permitted due to extra credit for the semester.

"Sure, what do you have in mind?"

"Well, the last thing we had to do was go shopping for the groceries. We were going to do it collectively, but being as you wanted to help with this yesterday, I am giving you the option." the black haired girl smiled a little as she started to continue her own classroom chore. Which was stacking the desks on top of each other to preserve space for cleaning.

"Sure, I would be happy to help. What am I going to be using to pay for this?" he grabbed the list from her as soon as she ripped it from the pad it was attached to beforehand.

The raven haired girl gave a few seconds before she started to talk again. "We are using the money from our fundraisers to make sure that we are able to get anything we can. You can get any snack you want, as long as it doesn't out-price everyone else's own foods. Understood?" she of course didn't need to look at him to know his response. The green haired boy was always careful and made sure not to short anyone else.

"See you when we get to the beach, Deku! I can't wait to go swimming!" the brown haired mushroom top cheered from the side of the room. Midoriya knew who it was before he looked over and smiled at her. The classes ray of sunshine and enthusiasm; Ochako.

"Yeah, I will see you guys there later, bye Iida-kun, Todoroki-kun, Uraraka-chan." with that he was out the door, and heading down the hallways. He walked past Shinsou and Monoma again, whom both seemed to have worried expressions on their faces. However, before they could stop and turn around to talk to the green haired teen, Nezou came up to them from another hallway and started to speak to the two. Midoriya vanishing from their sight.

After he was finally done shopping, the boy went to the beach, and put everything in the cooler that he bought. Many of the requested foods were frozen, and they needed a compartment to stay cool in. Most of the snacks were already in the cooler, making sure to keep them cold.

The beach was warm, and the sand that went over his red shoes was eternally hot. If the sand were to be any hotter, it might have been assumption-driven to call them hot coals in disguise. The grains of bleached white terrain were so light on the illuminated ground. More and more of the sand seemed to craw its way to the teen, the grains all falling over each other to make that leap at the teen whom was alone on the beach. At first, the distracted boy failed to notice the movement that had otherwise seemed so evident. Nothing being processed past his growing misty eyes.

Everything was situated now. The snacks all protected in one way or another. Sealed in a refrigerated bag or the cooler. The green haired boy took the time to walk to the line of water that was ever flowing. The wetness of the water that was unable to be changed came up and licked the beach. Leaving the indication of moisture, even if it was just for a fraction of a second. Before the sun took the soaking sand and made it back into the collected warm sand once again.

Another image, one all-too-familiar by now, made itself present once again.

'Midoriya Izuku, July 15th, 2018'

Midoriya winced as he held his head in a bursting blossom of white-hot pain shot through the head of the boy that stood at the edge. He had felt this pain many times before. Though it came by in many different forms. It presented itself in so many ways that it seemed it was the master of disguise. In one way or another, something changed. It made the same pains unrecognizable, no matter how repetitive they may have been in the past. There was so much the boy was familiar with. Everything he did to feel the pain while not cutting himself to bleed out his worried or his stress.

One of the many actions being trying to starve himself. Make himself feel the pain his mother described in her note to him, the inability to consume food properly. Feeling your stomach yelling at you for the nutrition you were unable to provide it.

Then there was the hitting of his head on the wall, namely in stress. The pounding headaches that his mother felt when he was being loud and obnoxious. When he was freaking out over nothing. It may have been something that both he and his mother had in common, but most of the things he was worried over was not worth the time they were given to have the attention.

There was the pain in her legs from her muscles getting weaker and weaker from her illness. Midoriya was also aware of that. Running his muscles until he collapsed. Just to get up and continue going until he passed out on the street. The pain in his legs keeping him from taking yet another step to feel his mothers agony. Yet another obstacle.

Another pain he caused himself was the lack of communication, no matter how much he wanted to speak and let his woes pool down to his feet in a waterfall of tears and woe. The salty waters of his sadness most likely combined together to fill over half the ocean. Just in this time alone. His eyes were wore and red most of the time and he let them burn with the repercussions his exhaustion and inner turmoil. Like all of those times his mother cried when he wasn't home. When he worried her, or even when he made her proud.

He was never one to give his pain to someone else. He was a hero-in-training. How was he going to help others if he didn't figure out how to help himself in the long run and give good advice? He knew the best thing to do was to talk to someone. However, in the same route, personally he felt selfish. Why did the attention need to be on him all the time when the others around him had other problems that easily outnumbered his own on a multitudinous scale.

The one thing he would never do was take to the twine, and take to the metal. Those were two very easy ways out of pain. He had no wishes to cease his existence. He just wanted to feel the pain his mom did with no complaint. To know what she really went through as a person to keep him; her own flesh and blood, happy and healthy. To keep him breathing, like he was. To keep his hopes and his confidence high. To make him one of the happiest kids ever.

A strange feeling overtook the green haired teen as he stared into the endless waters of the ocean. A reflection of himself staring right back into his eyes in it's own warped image. The firm placed expression seeming to waver on the waves as the movements from the endless blue rippled to him. The pain of his green eyes also becoming evident on the distorted mirror-like surface. The ocean seemed to make a humming sound, the noise deafening no matter how low it was. The freckled boy bending down to hold his head, the date showing up in his head, over and over again. Even as he stared into the waters in front of himself.

'Midoriya Izuku, July 15th, 2018'

'Midoriya Izuku, July 15th, 2018'

' MIDORIYA IZUKU, JULY 15TH, 2018'

The date was so prominent in his mind. The words were boldly printing them on his eyes, as if it were something that he was cursed to see. The red letters just obscuring his view of the otherwise once-beautiful landscape that had been in front of him just a second prior.

The vibrations continued to go and whir around in his head, making him unable to see straight. As soon as he turned his head upward, he caught glimpse of a familiar pink over-shirt on a slightly portly woman. The woman was short, her hair as green as the aged grass that made room for the fresher blades. The form was too familiar for the boy to want to process. It hurt him too much to even think it MIGHT be her.

Before he started to walk to the figure, he felt a common ID on him. It snapped him from his thoughts. The green haired boy took it off, and wrapped it around his hand. Pulling it tight to his skin to see if he was dreaming. The band and it's sustenance to the plastic it carried made itself useful, pinching Midoriya's hand thoroughly.

The form however failed to vanish from her perch. There she was, standing there in all of her glory as the beautiful sun made it's way across the sky. Also as blue as the endless ocean. The sea-foam of the sky that had been known as clouds for the longest time were adrift on the breeze, flowing to the north and on. The woman's hair also swayed that way, travelling to the left in comparison to the compass that the world naturally followed in it's order.

"Mom." it was more of a statement that anything really, what was there to say in his astonishment? What was there to say in the shock of the situation? Everything seemed to be spinning on it's axis. The world around them becoming a palette of mixes and blurs. The only thing he saw clear as day was his mother. Standing there as if she had not been gone for the near month now. She was good as new, no medical badge around her neck, no band-aids on her legs from her easily damaged skin. It was all flawless. The way he remembered her, and would always remember her.

"MOM!"

The boy started to run at the figure. He traveled up the length of the beach a bit, before hitting the dock where the woman stood at her perch. Almost as if she was some kind of jubilant and free seabird. Waiting to glide on the waves and find her way to the next home she sought. In the end, it all still linked it's way back here.

The woman turned around. Her ginger smile and warm green eyes were so alluring. Even to someone who possessed the same eyes, he knew what kindness others saw in them. The welcoming and understanding that only a mother was able to understand. The happiness of seeing striving young man on his way to his dreams was always one to brighten the mood one may say.

The contact was made with a hug.

Just a little warmth coming from a body that was clearly there, but none the less mistaken for something else. Midoriya cried into the form, and started to feel it turn cold. Even after the endless flows of constant 'Mommy's here." and 'Don't worry, my baby.' that came from the woman. The body grew cold and the once tender form started to feel shriveled and dis-configured. The slimness almost leading one to think that the unseen form was skeletal.

"This is all your fault. Izuku Midoriya." the voice was cold, and filled with an endless hatred. "It is your fault that she had to suffer alone!" the voice.. it was his own...

The malnourished version of the green haired hero-in-training grabbed a hold of the boy. His tender neck in the scrawny fingers that seemed to be made of iron or steel. The bony form looked endlessly into Izuku's eyes with his own beady black orbs. The eyes were always the window to the soul. These eyes were not sad, nor did they seem to express direct hate. There were too many emotions for anyone to be able to tell what the emotions were. However, the one thing that the boy did know, was that on the other end of those endless tar pits, there would be no soul to be found gazing back at him.

In surprise, he dropped his ID badge to the wooden planks that held them over the drop off. The figure smiling at him before it showed sharp teeth that no human could even bare. The needle-like bone in the mouth must have been so uncomfortable.

With a second of time, there was the now infamous date again, and Midoriya caught himself failing to struggle against the other version of himself. The distorted creature wielding his image became transparent to his eyes, and threw him into the deep current of the ocean, diving in with him. He struggled desperately for the oxygen his body was pleading him for, body writhing under the sheets of submerging cold sheet of water. The painful agony already at a high only doubled as the creature that stole his skin held his neck, and kept him from breaking the surface of the water to regain his freedom from the liquid prison.

As Midoriya tried to draw in a breath, in hopes of this all being a dream, he only drew more water into his lungs that were banging in his chest in a plea to get him to reach the surface once again. The date, it shows itself again, more transparent this time than the others. The print was still as clear as day, the current day still flashing in his mind.

So this is what it all meant, wasn't it?

'This is the best thing for you. You already feel like you were drowning... we are drowning in our woes. Time and patience can't heal what we failed to do. Maybe, just maybe, we can be free. Rest in peace; with mom.'

"MIDORIYA IZUKU, JULY 15TH, 2018'

Today was July 15th, and here he was, becoming another random spectacle to sink to the ocean bed as if he were just a lost ship in a storm. His clammy sky was the wood as it broke on the iceberg that referred to itself as life. His woes and his fears were the people who went down, refusing to leave the ship. His happiness and any other positive associated emotions made an attempt to flee on the life-rafts only to crash into the other obstacles.

Now that he thought about it, he knew this feeling already. The harsh struggle to breathe, and the yearning for the fresh air that had been provided but not taken. He was drowning in his sorrows, and he knew the feeling so well it was painful. Yet now, he was here welcoming it to his conscious.

He knew what the other things were now... what he saw before he took the plunge here in the grave of ships.

The things that were never there, but the production of a lonely and ailing mind searching for relief before ultimately turning itself back to the pits of pain.

Seeing his mother were, she was his want, he wanted her back so much... he wanted to be with her again and tell her how much he loved her. He wanted to hear her getting mad at him for what he was doing wrong. He wanted to hear her crying for being so angry, and eat the usual ice cream with her after they were done so they could feel better together.

Then there was himself. That was his pain and self loathing. In the end, the clone was talking to himself, while strangling himself in the process. The agony and the anger. It was all because he never shared any of the pain with the others around him. He hated himself for letting his mother die. She must have been so lonely and worried. Most likely worrying on her baby still as he lived his life outside the knowledge of her collapsing health. Her heart never wanting to open that gate to him because she knew how much it would break him.

'My name is Midoriya Izuku' he thought to himself as he continued to sink to the floor of the sea, his eyes closed tight as the last bit of his standing thought made it's way from his mind. No one here to hear him ramble. No one here to hear him mumbling and spouting out his juvenile nonsense into the unoccupied molecules of the surrounding settings of his life. "I guess, this is where my road ends." the thought was bitter, and made the would-have-been hero feel a chalky taste on his tongue. Imagining if he actually said those things that he thought so freely. "Today is July 15th, 2018"

'Happy Birthday to Me.'

"MIDORIYA!"

Thinking on what got them all up to this point, the purple haired mind-control quirk user could only shiver at the signs. The second the looked into the green haired teens eyes, he knew something was wrong. However, the touch... the contact that he had.. it only made him sick to his stomach. He saw a date, ominous in it's glow. The font was so prominent against the form of the boy. Reading out in all of it's glory, there was the date, being as obvious as it ever was.

"Midoriya Izuku, July 15th, 2018"

As soon as the odd caption like text seemed to appear in the purple haired teens mind, he felt himself get a chill. The image behind the print also coming to life with the memory that seemed to be so short lived in his mind. There was Midoriya, soaking wet, sinking to the bottom of the ocean. A blank look in his once alluring emerald eyes that had flashed with life so many times before the recent times.

"What the hell?!" the shout was curt and to the point. Clearly shaken, the crazy-haired hero in training started to tap his finger quickly, seeming to stress profoundly.

"Shinsou, what is the matter?" the blonde haired former ego-maniac was looking to his boyfriend, going over to comfort his ailing boyfriend. "Did you hurt something? Fall?" the questions came out quickly, by this time the purple haired boy failed to process a single word. Turning on heel to go and talk to the green haired boy, he and his boyfriend were stopped by principle Nezou, beckoning their presence.

They had to make up an excuse and get both of them out of there before the mammal started to really get going. It lead both of the teens to busting into the classroom that class 1A was in. However, there was no Midoriya, meaning that he had already went somewhere else. To boot, he traveled particularly quick.

"What is the matter Shinsou, Monoma?" it was the typical greeting of the cheerful invisible girl. Whom was grabbing her backpack from the side of the room where all of the other ones were put. She was chatting with Uraraka after that, talking about cute swimsuits or something like that.

"I think there is a problem. Please, don't make me explain, I can't. It's about Midoriya, I have a bad feeling. He is by himself right now I assume, and that only worries me more." Shinsou was talking quickly, his purple eyes more wide and twisted into a knot of confusion. "I saw something when I touched him, his name and the current date. I don't know what that means. Please tell me someone knows!"

"I think I know what it means..." there was a pause, everyone looking to the source of the voice. It was Ojiro, standing there with his hands in his sleeves and his tail waving in some kind of common contemplation. "I looked into a book on many things. My father used to let me look into them all the time. Seeing your name and the date..." the blondes eyes widened. He shot up to full attention, standing careful and aware for the movement. "WHAT WAS THE DATE ON THERE AGAIN?!"

"July 15th-"

"We need to get going now! The date means that it is something is supposed to happen to him!" the classroom seemed to have stopped working. Everyone started to easily become worried. All of them left the room quickly, Aizawa following behind them.

As the all tried to make their way through the many cars and other things that blocked the area, Todoroki freezing a path of ice over the traffic so they all could run over the bustling street below. Slowly getting closer and closer to the beach as they all ran.

The second they all got to the street, they saw a black string with an ID on the docs, laying there idly. Looking into the dephs below, they saw the lonely form of the boy, laying there in the water. His eyes closed and arms floating up above himself. Iida quickly jumped in, after Shinsou had called the others name. Reaching for the boy who was trapped in the water.

"MIDORIYA!"

beep... beep... beep...

'The heart rate is going strong. I think this one is going to be able to pull through, doctor.'

"That is good news. Make sure to keep him under close observation. He might start going the other way quickly. Take good care of him."

"Understood doctor. Are the others okay to come in?"

"Yes, just make sure to let them know not to be too loud."

"Isn't this that Midoriya Inko's kid? The one who was volunteering at the communal services areas before she got sick?"

'Yes, it is. He lost her about month or so ago, If I am not mistaken. That might have been what lead him up to doing this and being in this situation right now.'

'That is pretty rough... who is he living with now?'

"As far as I know, nobody. He doesn't seem to have any other family members that he knows here, and his father has been missing for a long time. I am surprised the police have not taken him into custody yet. He is only 15, so there is no way he should be living on his own yet..'

"Do you think he somehow managed to hide it doctor?"

"Most likely. However, I think they should be told, one way or another. If he does have to get moved to an orphanage, he most likely will be taken out of this town in general. The orphanages here are crowded as is. Meaning he would have no where to stay."

" I see. I will make sure to keep a good eye on him doctor. Thank you for your time."

"Anytime. Make sure to keep me posted."

"Yes sir."

"You all may come in now. He is not awake yet, bit he is stable and able to talk when he so decides to. Please make sure to stay calm and respect his personal space. I know you are all worried, however, it could cause him harm to be under stress of many questions." the doctor looked at the classrooms worth and more of students that had all gathered in the waiting room. They were all there trying to keep each other calm and make sure that no one flipped out.

"What is the statistics of the damage?" the dark haired teacher walked to the doctor, staying a little while away from his students to keep all of them from hearing the conversation at one time. The doctor looked at the serious teacher then looked at the clipboard in her hand. She let out a breath, bringing her hand up and signalling the man to follow her into hallways.

Of course, being concerned and curious as he was about the situation, the teacher complied and nonverbal command from the white-clad woman.

"He got a lot of water in his lungs, as you may already know. However, there were signs of strangling when we did our search of his body. The strangling doesn't seem to have been a complete choke hold, it wasn't intended to completely kill. So, if that is a case, I think he tried to choke himself out while he was underwater. This very well might be a suicide attempt." the teacher looked rather discomforted by that. His dark eyes seemed to somehow get darker in reaction to the unpleasant information he had received. "The water has caused his lungs some strain, so he may have some breathing problems for a while." there was another tender pause, though the occasion was not-at-all decent. "I am surprised he was alive, personally..."

The teacher looked at her with a quizzical expression on his brow as he knit them together in another free expression of concern. She allowed herself to pull her loose blonde bangs out of her face as she examined the green haired boys information.

"You see, due to the strain that was put on his body, the other doctors predict he was underwater for well over the normal amount of time that anyone should be able to survive. The person who did CPR on him did quite well, for getting him to cough up so much water so quickly." the pushed up her glasses, looking at the man with her soft brown eyes as she seemed to contemplate something.

" I see, I am glad. The boy who did CPR was Iida Tenya. A classmate of his. I guess I can now see why he was so anxious for the CPR quick-course last year. He learned well and applied it well, the other students all helped out well too..." the teacher seemed lost in thought. In another words, his misdirection of himself to the other students seemed to be a form of denial. Him not wanting to think on the fact that what happened that short while ago was actually real.

"Mister Aizawa, sir. I know I am not allowed to share such crucial information on patients that are not directly related to you by blood. However, you are this boys teacher, so I guess I am not breaking the law. This boy, do you have any idea why he might want to jump into the ocean and end his own life?" the teacher looked away, trying to think on the reason. Sure, everyone had bad days, but now that he had been forced to think about it, something about the boy was off, though it seemed none of his antics changed. He acted the same, he strives to be the best and help others. He smiled or others or made them feel like they were where they needed to be and helped them any way he was able.

"No. I really don't know."

"Please take a minute to sit down and listen to me. This may take a minute." the woman pulled up a chair for the man before pulling out her own and sitting down. She set the clipboard next to the near desk and started to try and get some stuff together and right in her thoughts. A final sigh went past her lips before the blonde woman started to speak again. "You see, from our records, this boy lost his mother about or over a month ago. She passed away due to health complications. The main problems were Crohn Disease, and Guillain-Barré Syndrome, and she hadn't been diagnosed with it for too long before she finally passed away. She was overexerting herself to make sure her son didn't find out about the illnesses. Even if it meant walking and falling down all the time, or just overall feeling pain." the lady looked to the raven haired teacher. He seemed to have been taken aback by such information and questioned as to why he had not heard about it before.

"How could he have managed to hide this information from the UA district though? How come he is still living alone and not with family. Unless he has family here that I don't know about." the man let his usual stoic demeanor down a little, thinking on the idly laying boy who was still sprawled to the hospital bed in the room.

"The doctor took pity on him. He is in grounds and related to the police force. They all agreed to hold the information from you guys. From some of the government itself too, as a matter of fact. They knew Miss Midoriya, as did I before her untimely passing. She was still such a young woman. Not outrageous, but still just as vibrant as everyone else in the prime of their own lives." the blonde seemed to be talking of the deceased woman quite fondly, a small off-focused look in her eyes.

"How do you know?"

" Mister Aizawa, sir. I knew her. Sure, I never got the chance to meet her son, Izuku, face to face. However, she talked about him all the time. About how she was so proud of him, and how much he had grown up. About how emotional he was around other people. He was the highlight of her life, I heard her say. She said it so much, always talking about her little man, finally able to work to accomplishing his dreams. She told me how he would dress up and they would play hero. I also heard her say how much she would have loved to do it more, after he was discouraged." the woman walked over to her desk, and picked up a photo of a woman, olden and hunkered over in a wheelchair.

There was a mischief-screaming look in her eye as she looked into the camera that had immortalized the moment. She looked like a kid, just like an aging kid who refused to give up on adventure and fun. Even if it was at the cost of her walking.

"This woman was my mother. She was always such a child. However, as old age REALLY started to hit her; even more so than the usual aging process, she was unable to continue her journeys. She wanted to be a pro hero, like much people do. However, she couldn't Miss Inko came in, and worked at the senior center. She looked after my mom and made her happier than she could ever be. Sharing the adventures of her son, and her hospitality to provide her the will to live longer. She made my mother so happy. So did Izuku, when he was able to come by. All of the elders loved to have them around." the woman sighed again before readjusting her glasses and putting her picture back. "My point is Aizawa-san; he needs to let out this pain. If this continues, there most likely will not be a next time. Now that you know something is wrong, talk to him."

"Won't that pressure him more and make him feel more stressed, doctor?" the man looked at her, uncertainty in his eyes as he tried to think of everything that could go wrong. The boy was already in pain. What was he going to do if he pushed the boy over the edge, making him even more stressed than what he already felt? As a teacher, he should know these things. However, he didn't.

"Aizawa-san. I know that it is much of a reason for concern. However, if he failed to tell all of you about his problems before, there is almost no way he would now. Even after the questioning. He needs the support of his friends. He needs to know you are all here, and wanting to help him without him calling for it. He needs to know he is valued as a person, and he is noticed even when he feels alone."

"Thank you for the help, miss. I really do appreciate this. I will make sure to talk to him and the rest of the class when he settles after this incident. So we can get it dealt with a better way."

"Good idea. You may head back now, that is all I had to say."

"Aizawa-sensei, your're back. What happened? Are you okay?" the prompt and worrisome blunette looked up to the teacher from his seat. Since the teacher had been pulled into the halls, they all had gotten situated in the large hospital room and stationed themselves around Izuku in a pattern. The few odd students that had followed along also were still there. Including Tetsutetsu, Juzo and Kendo from class 1B.

" I am fine, Iida. How is Izuku doing?" the raven haired man walked over to the green haired student, still limp in his bed. Having not shown any signs of waking up, nor even stirring.

"There seems to be no general movement from him. Even though it has been over the amount of time the doctor gave. I think he was just too exhausted. However, he should be awake in the morning tomorrow." Uraraka held her friends hand as he continued to lay there. Her sad brown eyes not leaving his form. "How could he do this to himself?"

"I don't get it either... I know that there is something that wasn't telling us. However, I can't place my finger on it. He was just so distracted..." the dual hair-colored son of Endeavor held the other hand of the green haired teen. His gaze was unidentifiable, but it was certainly just as concerned as everyone else's was. The two eyes looking to the clammy skin that lay in his clutches in particular.

"Maybe there is something going on at home." Jiro was standing with Yaoyorozu at the end of the bed, still onlooking at the teen as his heart monitor gave off a steady beeping. The other next to her holding her shoulder a bit to keep herself composed.

" I told Bakugou about it. It wouldn't be fair to leave him out of this. He and his mom are going to be driving back and getting here at 7:00 in the morning tomorrow. His dad is going to stay where he is and help their family member. He and Midoriya are friends, if he wasn't told until last minute, he would be pissed." The red haired student looked at all the others, his red eyes staring into other colors of the endless rainbow of options.

"From what I've seen, Bakugou never seemed to like the kid. What makes them best friends?" the voice came from Juzo. He was new to the group of friends, Midoriya being the one he has really gotten close to yet. "I am not saying I doubt you, I'm just curious..." the ash blonde male was more worried about the currently absent male hurting his new friend more less.

"I know Bakugou, don't worry. He is just bad at expressing himself, but he cares for everyone. He may be more unruly, but he still tries and he is really quite gentle if you get to know him when he is calm." Kirishima smiled to the skeleton-like boy. Naturally there was a need to be worried, he was new to the group as a friend. Unfamiliar with the ways that some of them interacted together. He was worried about the closest friend he had at the moment and his current condition.

"Alright..."

After that, everyone had to wait several hours. Nothing happened. There was no movement from the boy. He was just laying there, dead as a doorknob. He was not responding to anything.

Eventually they had to go home, and rest up, hoping that the next day was going to provide them answers. Their minds all racing. It turned from a day at the beach to a suicide attempt. They all had to make sure to clean up their mess on the beach as well, the abandoned food still laying there idly on the sand. The ice inside the cooler had all melted, and some of the frozen food had melted in on itself as well. It wasn't like they had time to deal with it earlier.

It was so shocking. Ojiro knowing the signs and Shinsou knowing the hint. It was scary, in a sense, as well. They seemed to know quite a bit themselves. It must have been one of the reasons they actually became friends later after the sports festival.

One thing was for sure. None of them slept well that night, if at all.

The first thing he remembered when he got up this morning was all of his classmates and his teacher all sitting around him in a circle. They were talking lightly with each other to make sure not to wake him up. The dark haired man was the first one to notice that he was awake. The man greeting him, getting everyones attention on him as well. There were so many sets of concerned eyes, all blinking at him as they took in the fact that he actually woke up.

At first, the green haired boy was ready to question his safety when he saw a rather pissed off looking Bakugou storming his way. His eyes were dark, leaking what looked like tears. He might have just been seeing things, and settled for that if the other didn't come up to the side of his bed and slam his arm down on it. Crying as he stared the green haired kid in the face, grumbling under his breath as his mother walked over.

Normally the woman would have given him a good smack over his head, however, she was too distracted. "Midoriya. Where is your mom? Why isn't she here with you to watch over you and the others?"

Oh, right, he forgot, he never told them what happened... he never told them his mom was gone. He refused to look the blonde woman in the face, as he looked down and sighed. "She's not here..." That was really the best he was able to say? He knew he was never one for lies, but what about when it came to keeping his friends and family safe? Keeping them from the harm of emotional problems and instability.

"I know where she isn't Izuku. Please tell me where she is so I can give her a proper call and get her down here. She is most going to freak out after I get a hold of her young man!"

The blonde woman looked at the young green haired hero in training and she gave a loud sigh, holding her heard. "Izuku, do you known how WORRIED SICK Katsuki and I were on our way down here?! He didn't sleep, he didn't eat, and neither could I! What would ever make you go and pull something as selfish as this?!"

As the woman spoke, Midoriya thought again on how he even got into the water to begin with. He knew that no one else pushed him in there. He saw his mother, and himself. Thinking on it as he was on the verge of death, he understood. The only one that truly did that to him was himself. He was the one who strangled himself, tossed himself in the water.

Aizawa, staring at the scene at the moment sighed. He was the only one who knew. He needed to get his student to talk about it and be honest. Otherwise, he wouldn't really be trying to help him. "Midoriya. You have something bothering you. You need to explain what is wrong to us. Otherwise we can't help you."

There was nothing but silence, the green haired hero-in-training staring at his teacher as he tried to figure out a loop hole. He wasn't worth worrying about, he was fine. He just had one little slip-up, that was all, he just needed to make sure that he didn't do it again. "There is nothing wrong, please believe me."

"I don't." the voice came from Bakugou, the ash blonde teenager looked at the bedridden teen with an expression mixed between the melancholy worry and his growing anger. The blondes teeth were clenched in the growing anger, eyes narrowing even more at the boy in front of himself. He should have been used to seeing the green haired dork in the bed of a hospital. Seeing some sort of damage that had been caused to him from him being stupid in the training field or some shit like that. "Tell the fucking truth now, you nerd! Why did you fucking do this to yourself and end up here?!"

Of course, Midoriya lacked an answer. His eyes darkened as he looked to the pale white tile that made up the floor of the room he was in. Letting the unstable and sad thing that his mind was wander for just a minute in order to get a good grip on it again. His thoughts were all jumbled, mixed up in some kind of delusional array that only failed to affect his hearing. Sad enough as that really was to him.

He hated hearing the worry of the others, directed at him because he was the one who made the mistakes. He was the one who had committed to the actions and played them out like a fool. In the end, it really did come back to him being selfish, only wanting to save his own ears from the concerns of others around him that valued him like he valued them.

But, going back around the same old stump of the sawed down tree, the undeniable fact that still remained was the fact that the tree was there in the first place. Like all unattended wounds, they became infected, and agitated. Leading themselves in the same old song and dance in the same pit of despair that he refused profusely to pull himself out of.

"FUCKING SPIT IT OUT, YOU DAMNED NERD!"

With a wince, the green haired teen started to feel the stress of the situation, and how selfish he really was for thinking that keeping this to himself was the best way to protect his friends. His eyes started to fill with tears as his bottom lip trembled from the will to keep it all in still, even after he knew well what he had just established with himself.

"Okay. I know, I know what I did was selfish. I know what I did was wrong, and that it should have never happened. I know.." he felt the stinging of his tears building up past the floodgates, the salty water falling down the skin of his cheeks as he sucked in a raspy breath. "I also know that mom is very mad at me, she has every right to be-"

"You better bet your ass she is going to be when I get a hold of her-" the blonde woman started to yell again, though this time she was barely even a sentence into her lecture when the green haired teenager stopped her right where she was.

"You can't, Miss Bakugou."

"What do you mean I can't?! I can and I will-"

Getting frustrated, the boy let out a choked sob as he leaned forward and he yelled for everyone to hear in the room. His eyes still flowing like a couple of sad emerald origin waterfalls. The green eyes so dark in their misery they appeared to be like coals to those who glanced and not looked thoroughly.

"SHE'S DEAD, OKAY?!" the boy covered his face, and scoot his aching legs up to his chest as he pulled himself into an entire fit of sobbing. His legs held by his arms as his permanently damaged hands covered his eyes to keep the others keen gazed off of himself. "She passed away, Miss Bakugou. She passed away around a month ago, and I never knew it was going to happen until it was too late."

The woman calmed down, looking at him with a seemingly blank stare, until she actually processed the information that she had been given by the son of the woman she had so much affection for. At first, she looked like she was about to call out the boy for blasphemy. However, she knew, she knew that what he said was true. It all made sense now. The fact that the green haired woman was not here now was even more proof. Even if she had not been notified of her son being hurt, she would have known off mothers instinct and would have showed up naturally.

The entire class was stuck sitting there in shock as they heard what Midoriya had said as well. There were of course many different reactions. Uraraka and Iida both reacting with the most surprise and Todoroki walking closer to his green haired friend, showing a small sign of comfort.

"She had Crohn Disease, and Guillain-Barré Syndrome. They both were the ones that did her in, in the end." the boy brought up his arm to wipe his eyes, hiccuping after trying to take a few breathes to steady his breathing and get it back under control. "She didn't even tell me. She hid it from me to make sure I didn't worry about her when I could be doing the things I needed for my schooling and such." the teen remembered the last conversation he had with his mother, his mind still wildly spinning at the thought. "Don't be upset, honey." she said to me. "Make sure to remember that mommy loves you and that you have made her very happy to be alive. You gave me a reason to keep going and I am happy that you have made yourself who you are."

The freckled teen rehearsed the words so many times it was as if it were meant to be carved into the damaged canvas of his skin. The words were always vivid in his mind, along with the long beep and pained silence of what was bound to happen in minutes after the kid words were placed upon his conscious and now frenzied mind.

Kirishima, being the emotional and manly support that he was always known to be, walked up to the shorter classmate and gave him a hug. He knew that the other desperately needed one. The green haired boy of course was little surprised, however, he accepted it. Pouring out his pain in gallons as he cried on his shoulder.

Soon enough, others started to join in, if they were unable to hug the ailing classmate, they hugged whoever was closest to him. Of course, there was the few oddballs that pat his shoulder instead, not really knowing how to show the same kinds of affection as the others.

"Midoriya-kun. Who would you ever refuse to tell us such information? We are all supposed to be your friends, why would you keep such deep pain as this away from all of us and keep in in yourself? We already know what happened when I did the same thing, and it got all of us hurt!" the blunette never did identify what he was talking about, but himself, Midoriya and Todoroki all knew well what incident he was referring to.

"I thought I was going to be able to handle it on my own. I always feel so selfish because I connect myself to things and make myself feel like there was something that was my fault. Then I get question about it. I always feel bad for making others worry when they have better things to do. I kept telling myself that I was not worth the time."

"Stop right there, Izuku." there was a firm voice coming from the ash-blonde childhood friend that Izuku always looked up to. "Listen up here, you fucking nerd. I may not be the nicest person to you, but I can tell you up, down, fucking cockeyed and backwards that you ARE WORTH THE TIME. So don't fucking say that to yourself again! There are others here that care about you, and respect you. If you were not worth anyone's time, you would have been on your own a long time ago!" the red eyed boy started to shout louder, getting in the boys face after shoving a couple people out of his way. "DON'T YOU FUCKING DARE DO ANYTHING THIS STUPID AGAIN!"

Midoriya took some heaving breathes as he allowed himself to calm down before he wipes his eyes, smiling to himself as he started to laugh at the situation. "You're right... I was being stupid... I knew you all would be there for me... I just failed to recognize how much I had." he looked to all of them, smiling before closing his eyes. "I love all of you so much... please, forgive me..."

"Of course we do, you dumb ass." The ash blonde bent down, and give the other a small hug "If any of you extras ever say this happened, I am going to kill all of you in your sleep and incinerate your remains..." he whispered to the others who were all watching, quite horrified, at that.

Midoriya only laughed, and he hugged the other back gently, before getting told by the other to stop being such a pansy and hug like a man. "S-sorry Kacchan!"

A few days after, Midoriya and his friends all went to the beach and enjoyed their day. Of course, everyone kept a close eye on him and made sure that he didn't do anything stupid. The green haired boy. was having fun, and looking forward to the event.

As soon as the sun started to set, Midoriya and his friends rowed out in several boats given to them by the beach lifeguards. Carrying with them paper lanterns of many sizes and design. They rowed out to a small current in the ocean, all whispering prayers for the person that they were there for, Miss Inko Midoriya. Kind words and warm hearts made the words feel as though they were light and airy. Carrying them on a warm wind to the ears of the fallen mother and all the love she had in the afterlife.

The green haired teen smiled and looked at what he had in his pocket. It was a small jar, with a little bit of his mothers ashes in them. The jar having the ashes accompanied by her favorite plastic ring that she used when playing with Izuku. Along with some petals from the Kiku and Tsubaki flowers that had been in front of her picture. Laying in there to make the cremated remains seem as though they were just a silvery powder to accompany such the vibrant hues. The jar was sealed and also had a small oceanic rock on the inside, pink in color.

The freckled boy placed the jar in the water and watched as the current washed it away as it sunk to the unsearchable depths of the liquid. He smiled sadly, and thought on his mother again. She loved the ocean so much, and in her lifetime, she had made a wish to go on a small cruise around the ocean. Nothing too fancy, just something for fun. To see the beautiful coral and animals of the waters below.

This small practice here, it would give her the option. In his home, her dust was not going to be able to go anywhere. Here, the will of her own love for movement was going to be enough. She was going to travel, just like she wanted.

With a final sigh, the boy allowed himself to stand and smile, just letting the worries go. It felt like his worries had melted, and joined the worried he poured into the ocean as he cried himself to almost death before. At the mercy of his own hands and an overactive guilty conscience. A flash of an image on the water caught his eye, before he smiled and faced the others. All of them smiling at him to provide him more comfort in the moment. The boat rowed toward the shore, ripples over the translucent making their way across the vast horizon of darkened blue.

The green haired boy left with his current memory of the image that had flashed before him in the water, and started to cry happy tears. He would forever hold it in his heart, and cherish the events that tore him down, built him up and made him stronger. The memory engraving the words into his mind like a carved piece of pottery.

"Mommy loves you, always. I am so proud of you, my baby."

Stepping on the shore, and making his way over to the fire, he acknowledged the words there too, instead of being in their normal ominous red, they were in a calm and loving white. Barely sticking out from the sand.

" Midoriya Izuku, ∞ "

(That is the end of the story)

(Notes - Flowers in the story that are mentioned are 'Kiku' and 'Tsubaki' which are Chrysanthemum and Camellia's)

Story Process Thoughts and Internal Review

- Mama Midoriya's Age - I Don;t know her age, so I was stuck guessing. Please do not hate me for getting this wrong. LMAO ;-;

- Types of Depression : Everyone knows that the most common types of suicidal acts or depressive expression tend to be cutting, along with many other things, such as hanging, and in other cases such as jumping off of a tall building roof or from a high window. I didn't want to do that typical stuff, because from physical experience, I know that in any case, someone who is hurting emotionally like this usually tries ANYTHING to get themselves to feel that pain. So painful exhaustion, starving yourself and even trying to drown yourself are all some things that I have grown familiar with.

- Midoriya Inko: Even though she is a really emotional person, it one of her traits that makes her one of the best anime mothers in my opinion. She also is one of the most realistic and down to earth ones that I have seen in anime that I have watched. She doesn't blatantly lie, unless it has a cause. Even so, it would most likely eat at her from the inside out if it were the case. She is also one of the first anime mothers I recall seeing shrink and get a little chubbier in her older age. There is also the theory of stress eating. Both of which I appreciate because it actually happens in the real world. I felt really bad for killing her of in this story...

Water: The water is such a nice place. I love it so much. That is why I used it in here, however, in accordance to feelings, others can feel drowned in the cold and dark phases in their lives. It makes some people irrational and even uncaring. Both being emotions I am very much used to.

/ Outgoing Messages - Please, for the love of sweet baby Jesus, talk to someone if you are feeling emotionally distressed. I know it is hard trying to find someone who will listen to you.