cool beans

Funny Faces

"Dear lord what the hell did you do now Axel!" Xemnas said as he looked around his charred kitchen. The once beautiful white appliances where now blackened and it looked as if everything else had gotten the same treatment.

The superior looked closer at the burned stove. "Water" he said to himself and there was a sleek layer of water on everything. "AXEL, DEMYX GET YOUR ASSES DOWN HERE RIGHT NOW!"

He waited for a few minutes and when he was sure they weren't coming he went to go look for them but before he got out of the room he slipped in a puddle of water and fell on his ass.

"When I get my hands on them I will strangle them with there own hair" he mumbled to himself.

"When you get your hands on who and what the hell happened in here" Saix said as he just appeared out of nowhere.

"Where the hell did you come from Saix, you scared me shit less" Superior said as Saix helped him get up. "Well I heard you screaming and usually your not one to scream so I wanted to see who was getting there asses kicked."

"When I find them Axel and Demyx are dead nobodies" Xemnas said through clenched teeth.

"Don't you mean Axel, Demyx, and Roxas" Saix said looking around the kitchen. "Roxas too?" Xemnas asked "Yup" Saix said "look on the table" Xemnas walked over to the kitchen table and felt around. "Hmmm" he said as he grabbed roxas's black keyblade the one he called the oblivion.

"Well should we go look for them?" Saix asked.

Xemnas didn't answer he just walked out of his ruined kitchen and went into the castles library one door down from the kitchen.

Xemnas walked up to a small person reading in an over sized chair. "Hello Zexion do you know where Axel, Roxas, and Demyx are?" Zexion looked up from his book "no, neither will Lexious we tend to keep away from the trials of morons."

Xemnas glared at Zexion fo a while then Zexion put down his book and sighed "At around four in the morning I heard Axel fumbling around in the kitchen I looked in the door and I saw a drunk Axel groping Roxas." He paused and sighed again "So I told Demyx to keep an eye on those two, but then I realized who I just sent to watch them, the same kid who lost all six of his hamsters in one week." He paused again "Then I ran into Vexen, on my way back to the library and told him too make sure Axel didn't get out of the house, he mumbled some stuff about not being respected I just told him I would sick Saix on him if he didn't."

"Alright if you don't know anything I shall go talk to Vexen" Zexion didin'tsay anything he just went back to his book.

As Xemnas turned to go to the basement he heard Zexion say "If you do find Demyx tell him that I'm sorry for yelling he'll know what I mean." Xemnas kept walking he had no intentions to pass on this message.

As he was walking down the hallway he ran into Saix "Ah Saix where have you been, and what happened to you?"

"Well I went to go see if xigbar or xaldin knew where they where and ... well do you know that saying when the bed's a rocking don't go a knocking?"

"Yes."

"Well..." He turned around and had like a bazillion of Xigbars "bullets" in his back and one if Xaldin's wind spears shoved up his ass.

Xemnas didn't say anything , he was afraid he might start burst out laughing if he opened his mouth. "There just lucky I was in a good mood I would have...

Saix just went on about what he would have done to them if he was in a "bad mood".

After all the weapons where pulled from Saix they traveled down to the basement. "This place always gives me the creeps" Xemnas said as he was brushing the dust off the handrail to walk down the steps. They got to the bottom of the stair case and where confronted by a door.

"Since when did the basement have a door?" Saix asked "Since I started finding his "creations" in my bed."

"I'm not one of his creations and you always seem to find me in your bed" Saix said with a smile on his face.

"Well your invited puppy" Xemnas said with a smug look on his face.

He opened the door they saw a few metal tables with different vials of different colored liquids. they walked up closer to the man, he was hunched over a large metal table and on it was a...wait is that a naked Miraluxa.

"Um er Vexen" Xemnas momenteraly lost his train of thought.

"Ah this well I demand respect an this is what happens when I don't get it" he said very plainly.

"Um OK I don't really want to know, but um have you seen Axel, Demyx, and Roxas anywhere?"

"Not recently but...SAIX DON'T TOUCH THAT" but he did and the little empty bottle fell to the floor and shattered making a loud cracking noise. With that Miraluxas eyes shot open and he started to scream incoherently.

Then he screamed "WHAT THE HELL AM I DOING DOWN HERE AND WHY AM I NAKED" with that he ran up the stairs tripping on the way up.

"Darn I had big plans for him" Vexen said "Still don't want to know, but what I do want to know is the answer to my previous question."

"Ah yes, yes Zexion told me to go look after them at around five in the morning because thats my usual waking time, you know early bird gets the worm, Axel looked as if he was about to pass out but he said he wanted eggs, god I hate drunks and unfortunately he got Roxas to have a few beers so Demyx was the only sober one there and well Roxas was playing with the gas on the stove so I coud just spell disaster."

Xemnas had heard enough "when did you leave them?"

"Well I didn't leave them alone but I couldn't get them outside to cool down so I left and got Larxene I figured she could get them out of the kitchen and somewhere they would be less destructive,but as I left the kitchen I heard what sounded like an explosion and Demyx's water summon. So lets just say I made haste in finding her."

"So we have to go find Larxene now uhg when will this nightmare end." Saix said.

"Very soon Saix" Xemnas said, and it was the truth.

They took there leave form the basement and headed for oh god no Larxene's room. As they came to her door they saw it was slightly ajar. Xemnas puffed out his chest and repeated to himself "it's my castle" then he walked in the door to hell.

"Larxene I have a question to ask you have you seen Axel, Demyx, and Roxas latley?" while he was waiting for his answer Saix was looking around the room. There was twelve large cardboard cutouts of all the other organization members.

Larxene sneered at the both of them and said "I dumped Axel and them in his room, Roxas was mumbling some thing about leaving his keyblade but I wasn't going back there for a couple of drunks and Demyx."

"Thank you Larxene" xemnas said through clenched teeth. he wsint used to thanking her.

"Whatever" she said as she picked up two of her lighitng darts and threw them at the Xemnas and Saix cutouts getting them right in there privates.

Xemnas and Saix got the hint, grabbed there crotches and ran.

They ran until they where outside Xemnas and Saix stood outside the front door for a few minutes catching there breath. Thats when Xemnas noticed the hose on the side of the house. It was percuriously placed right below Axels window.

It didn't take long to divise there plan they where going to wake the sleeping arsonists with an ice cold shower.

When they finnaly got the hose into his room they looked at the bed, they where all huddled together in what looked like an attempt to stay warm.

"Awww" Saix said "only a heartless man would do something like where about to" he said that with so much sarcasum in hie voice an idiot could figure out what he really wanted to say.

"Well its a good thing I'm a nobody" he said as he let the water go.

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AN/ well how did you like it it's my very first fanfic so Im really happy I finally got one up so plz review Im thinking of continuing with a collection of short stories so if you liked this one stay in tune I'll be back. Oh and sorry if my spelling is off if I misspelled something tell me.