When he couldn't sleep, Michael liked to watch Sara until he could drift out of consciousness. It had become his favorite part of the night, watching her eyelids flutter as dreams filled her resting mind. On that particular night, she was having just as much trouble sleeping as he, and on several occasions he opened his eyes to find her staring at the ceiling. Something was troubling her, she was never prone to insomnia like he was.
"Care to share?" He whispered in her ear and draped his arm across her stomach.
She turned to face him and adjusted the comforter that was covering them both, "If this were all over tomorrow, what would you want to do?"
"Go to Wal-Mart without sunglasses and a baseball hat covering my face?"
Her weak smile only flashed across her face briefly, "I mean what do you envision our life being like?"
A truck passed on the highway and made the room quiver, the lights from its headlights illuminated the room for an instant, just long enough to let him in on the worried look she wore.
"I haven't thought about it. I know that I want to be with you. I want Linc and LJ safe as well. That's really all I'm concerned about. The rest will fall into place."
"You haven't once thought about the future? If our lives are no longer in danger, and you're a free man, you have to live somewhere. You'll have to go back to work; you'll have to -- balance your checkbook again."
"So that's what you're dreading--"
"Michael I'm serious. All we known together is chaos. What if we don't work when things get back to normal. Could you handle such a boring life?"
"What's this really about?"
"Just answer the question."
She had pulled away from him slightly and had shifted onto her back. Her rich brown hair spilled over her pillow in a heap. It had finally grown out from when she gave herself a haircut, and he loved being able to run his hands through it. He reached out and touched it softly, feeling grateful for such a small pleasure.
"For months, I thought I had lost you. All I could think about were the things that I missed. I wasn't thinking about our secretive rendezvous or how we were constantly having to look over our shoulders. I was thinking about your laugh, and how appreciative it is. I was thinking about your selfless nature, and how you gave up everything to do what was right. I was thinking about what I would give to just -- hold you. I wanted desperately to have met you at a different time, when our lives were unexciting and safe. When all we had to focus on was each other. I can't begin to tell you how much I crave that moment when all we have to do is balance our checkbooks."
It was silent in the cheap motel room that they were calling home that week. A few moments passed before he realized she was crying.
"Sara, what's going on?
"I didn't want to worry you," she wrapped her arms around him and let her tears fall onto his bare skin.
"Honestly you're doing a terrible job of that right now," her brief laugh calmed his nerves slightly.
"I wasn't going to tell you for a while, but I cant carry this burden on my own anymore."
"I'm pregnant Michael."
The air seemed to have been sucked from the room.
Another car passed by and she searched his face for a reaction, "I'm sorry to tell you this way. I could have waited until this Scylla mess was sorted out, but ---"
"Stop."
"I'll understand if you don't --"
"I beg of you. Do not finish that sentence."
He kissed her forehead and let his hand drop to her stomach, "This is quite possibly, the best news I think anyone has ever given me."
"But the timing is--"
"Also about the worst timing imaginable."
She laughed her appreciative laugh and allowed her body to fit the curve of his, "I guess there isn't anything we can do about that."
"You're done with this first thing in the morning. I'm putting you on a train, you can hang out with LJ down in Mexico or something."
"I'm not leaving you."
"You don't have a choice. The thought of not being with you makes me physically ill, but we need to think about that little sea monkey you've got inside you."
The bed shook from her laughter, "Please don't refer to our child as 'that little sea monkey'."
He smiled and agreed, "Ok ok sorry. We need to think about our son and not our own needs."
"You mean daughter."
"Whatever. The point is this is something that has to happen."
"I know."
Headlights lit up the room that looked nearly identical to the countless other motel rooms they had stayed in. It was an exciting life on the run, one that neither of them ever imagined would end. Now, with a new burden between them, the future held new hope. They would no longer just pray that everything would turn out ok, they would make it.