Bonjour! Me again :)

For your delight and delictation I have the first of a series of one shots focused on Hermione and Draco, that includes their children and the Potter and Weasley families.

I hope you enjoy the fun and hilarities that will be coming your way and may leave me a review if you wouldn't mind? :)

Thanks to my sister for her work as my Beta and no I'm not J.K Rowling. Obviously.

xxxxx

"DRACO MALFOY GET YOUR SLIMY ARSE DOWN HERE RIGHT NOW BEFORE I COME UP THERE MYSELF AND TURN YOU INTO A COCKROACH!" Hermione bellowed." I'm actually going to kill him!" She added furiously to Ginny who was sat on the sofa opposite her.

"What's with all the shouting?" Molly Weasley said, peering her head round from the kitchen.

"Sorry Molly" Hermione said genuinely, "it's just my husband's an absolute TWIT!"

Right at that moment Draco glided round the corner into the Weasley's sitting room with a mischievous smirk plastered across his face."You called my love?" He said innocently, trying not to laugh.

"WHAT. THE. BLOODY HELL. IS. THAT?" With that last word she pointed to her forehead, with Ginny convinced that steam was actually coming out of her ears.

As calmly and smoothly as only Draco could manage, "It appears you have 'I love Slytherin' written across your gorgeous forehead."

"I'm not stupid ferret -" but before Hermione could continue Draco interrupted with a tone dripping in fake innocence.

"You're blaming me aren't you?" He said, looking pained. "Why, little old me would never do such -" this time Hermione interrupted with steam now seemingly coming from her nose as well.

"Well none of the kids are capable of this kind of magic or at least to make it this permanent!" Hermione said angrily, rubbing at the offending lettering.

Draco couldn't contain a snigger which was followed by a death glare from Hermione and a smirk from Ginny which she prayed her best friend didn't see.

"Ron though stupid enough to do it, has been with Emily all morning and Harry is clever enough not to mess with his wife!" Hermione continued.

"HEY!" Exclaimed Ron who had just walked through the door with Harry and realised that one of his best friends had insulted him.

"You're a disappointment, you know that?" Commented Draco to Harry on the fact that he was so under Ginny's thumb.

"Yes, but at least I've still got my own eyebrows." Harry said referencing the last time Draco got on the wrong side of Hermione, Ginny looking smug at his side.

Draco's head shot round to his wife who was wearing a smirk any Slytherin would be proud of."True. But the make-up sex makes it all worthwhile doesn't it darling?" Draco said with a wink, Hermione's face very quickly turning into a glare.

With each word Hermione took a step closer to her husband "You ferret, are a loathsome, stupid -"

"Handsome?" Draco offered.

"Arrogant -"

"Incredibly smart? -"

"Wretched -"

"Wonderful? -"

"Little git!" Hermione finished, a centimetre away from his face.

"God you're sexy when you're angry." Draco said with a huge grin.

Everyone in the room either closed their eyes or shook their head at their friend's lack of sense, with Harry putting a palm to his forehead.

Hermione with not a seconds notice shot her wand at Draco, instantaneously leaving him covered head-to-toe in Gryffindor badges.

"Nice look dad, that colour really brings out your eyes." Said 11 year old Cassius Malfoy, who had just walked in the room, looking nonplussed at his parents' behaviour.

Everyone in the room let out the laughter they'd been holding in due to fear of Hermione turning them into a woodland creature, but Hermione however, was too busy looking proud of her son's choice of allegiance.

"You two really need to stop using your children for point scoring." Said Emily noticing her friend's happiness at her son's reaction, knowing full well they wouldn't listen to her.

"Yeah and Cass is the only one that has been sorted, he's in Gryffindor but you've got two left." Ron said agreeing with his wife.

"Well yes; but Arlo is Draco incarnate and Lucinda yesterday managed to get a pumpkin pasty off Bill, George and Ron -"

"She did?" Molly interrupted not knowing whether she was more shocked or impressed.

"Yep, and considering she's only two and about all the words she knows are daddy, mama, wee wee and idiot; I think we can conclude she's a Slytherin!" Draco said proudly.

"Though Mione, I think 'idiot' has more to do with Albus Potter that anything else." Ginny said shooting her 8 year old a Molly Weasleyesque glare who was sniggering in the corner with Arlo.

"Question?" Said a very puzzled George Weasley who had just entered the room.

"Why did I just find a pumpkin pasty in my sock?" He said with said sock in one hand and the offending pasty in the other."I mean don't get me wrong it is ingenious, not only does it keep them from my gluttonous brothers but it also keeps them lovely and warm! Really is quite clever!" George mused.

"That," said a very smug Draco, "would be my favourite girl."

"What, Hermione? Because I really don't think..."

"No, no my other favourite." Draco said picking up Lucinda.

"Ohhh." said a smiling George Weasley, "Lulu, I just knew from the moment we me met, that we'd get on. Step into my office." George said, taking the shockingly gorgeous blonde from her father, carrying her into the garden.

Hermione shaking her head, had given up being angry and concluded that she should have known what she was getting herself in for when she married the prat.

"Right then you two" said a tellingly experienced mother of six mischievous boys towards Hermione and Draco, "let's get you cleaned up."

And with that the pair followed Molly into the kitchen like naughty school children; Draco, unable to resist giving his wife a dig in the ribs with his elbow, was met with a shove off Hermione which lead to him to losing his balance, go flying over a chair and landing on his backside. With a mischievous cackle, Hermione continued into the kitchen to be dealt with by Molly.