"Wowie!" Trout yelled.

He was reading an ad in the local newspaper about a bounty for Captain Lubs Tubs' toy chest. Captain Lubs Tubs was a rival of Trout, spanning back to when Captain Lubs Tubs pushed his twin brother over in the sandbox years ago. Trout kept reading, and realized that the bounty was worth over 68 trillion double dollars ($$68,000,000,000.00)!

"Now's my time to get revenge, you enemy!" Trout screamed at the newspaper.

Trout grabbed his space-phone and hastily called up his friend, Goo. The phone rang for a few seconds, until Goo picked up.

"Wowsers, Trout… It's currently 3 am." Goo murmured.

"DUDE-THERES-AN-AD-FOR-THE-CAPTAIN-LUBS-TUBS-MORE-THAN-OVER-68-TRILLION-DOUBLE-DOLLARS!" Trout replied.

"O-BOY-REALLY? CALL-ME-BACK-LATER!"

Goo calmly placed the phone down on his nightstand and went back to bed.

"A rogue never sleeps, Mark." Trout said.

Trout hopped into his SPACE CAR and started to drive to Goo's house. Along the way, Trout stopped at a mechanic's store and bought some lock picking tools. He continued down the road to Goo's house.

He parked his car far away from Goo's house and walked the rest of the way. When he got there, he started to look into the windows. They were all locked. Trout pulled out a screwdriver and started to fiddle with the lock. He spent an hour, but he finally did it and got in.

He snuck into the kitchen, and worked his way to his friend's room. He planted his back into a wall and slid his way down the hall. He opened the door to his friend's room and saw him sleeping. He fell onto the floor and slithered to the bed.

Trout slowly moved up and up the bed, and got right next to Goo's ear.

"GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" He screamed.

Goo flipped out, he had pajamas on and a computer full of games on. Trout just smiled and looked at him, Goo pulled out a gift and pointed it at his nose.

"OK FRIEND WHAT DO YOU WANT?" Goo screamed.

"You gotta help me befriend Captain Lubs Tubs dude!"

Goo just looked at Trout in disappointment, his eyes still half shut from waking up.

"Ok, if I install some tech onto your space fedora will you leave me alone until tomorrow?" Goo asked.

"Yes?"

"Fine, hand it over."

Trout handed the space fedora over. Goo put it next to his computer and started to tinker about it.

Hours passed until he finished. Day broke and Goo wasn't tired anymore. He handed the space fedora back and shooed Trout off.

Trout hopped back into his car and started to drive, thinking about ways to break into the space ship. He finally came up with the idea of stealing a COOL SPACE PLANE.

Suddenly, Trout heard something from his space fedora; it sounded like video games.

"Who-"

"OH MAN SORRY TROUT." Goo replied.

"Uh... while you're stopped doing whatever... where could I get a RADICAL SPACE PLANE?"

"Sneak into the SPACE AIRPORT and steal a C-68 Plane, that one is never guarded and has equipment inside incase you make and error on your space journey."

"Alright." Trout said, driving a little faster.

He arrived at the space airport. It was a few blocks down from Goo's house. The airport was barely guarded, all Trout had to do was hop a fence and he was in.
"Be careful Trout, the place may seem unguarded, but there are cameras and guards hiding in dark corners waiting for people like you to take the bait." Goo said.

Trout nodded, and crawled to the side of the airport, with the C-68 waiting in the bay

"If this place is a bandit trap like me, wouldn't the C-68 be like-uh, uh, a space trap?" Trout whispered to his space fedora.

"No, they want people to steal that not-very-good plane. You could even probably just ask to have it and they would give it to you."

Trout looked confused, but still nodded.

"This may be a sloppy break-in, but I'll at least escape in a sweet SPACE PLANE."

Trout hopped the fence and bolted for the plane. Since he was a Trout, he was extra-slippery and could run incredibly fast. Trout was so fast, in fact, that he ran past multiple security cameras and guards without them noticing.

He hopped into the plane and flew off, the space-reverse-anti-aircraft not even shooting at him.

"Nice work, Trout!" Goo squizzed in joy.

Trout had a rad nasty extremely cool grin, excitement showing in his face forcome.

"What are the coordinates to the ship again Goo?" Trout asked.

"I already programmed them onto your ship, you should be there in a few space minutes."

The ship turned on its SuperFluid HyperLight Iterated Quantum TAS *Space* Engine (SHLIQTSE) and warped through space. Darkness became gray as space light warped behind him and he could see behind him.

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO" Trout screamed

The ship crashed into the side of the space pirate space ship. Its space energy field blocked the impact and captured Trout in its aura. Thousands of "plasma rifles" extended, preparing to rupture trout's soft flesh, bursting with gore and leaving nothing but a bloody pile of organs and meat.

Trout tipped his space fedora, running to grab his space jetpack. The "plasma rifles" started to "shoot at the ship".

An alarm started to ring from inside the ship.

"WARNING - 68% FIRE CAPACITY REACHED, ESCAPE OR I WILL PROBABLY EXPLODE."

Trout looked around in a panic, red lights flashed and multiple "plasma" loads started to penetrate the "ship". Trout grabbed his nonalcoholic and child friendly space drink™ for the space road and threw himself out the "ship" right before it went into oblivion.

The pirate ship decided to hold up an LED sign saying: "Have a nice day!"

Trout looked down in shame, gin and tonic in his hands. There was also something else, a dark gray glowing space ball.

"*sniff*, G-oo.. What is this?" Trout asked while holding in tears.

"Oh, those are 'Spirit Balls'! They can be used to manipulate a being's emotions. You currently have the spirit of space shame. You can shove your spirit into someone's throat to make them feel that emotion. Apparently you have so much emotion it leaked from your soul and you got extra." Goo replied.

"Oh, ok.."

Space hours floated away like Trout's dreams. Trout had to eat parts of his arm and drink all of his nonalcoholic and child friendly space drink™ to stay alive. Soon, space days became space weeks, and space weeks became space-

"O MY THERES MY HOME" Trout yelled as he crashed into his planet's atmosphere.

He crashed into his house so hard he broke the roof and created an explosion spanning a square mile, killing 68% of his town's population.

"THAT TOTALLY DUSTED THE SHELVES EVEN WHERE I'M SITTING!" Screamed Goo.

Trout slowly stood up, and looked around,debris everywhere.

"So much for a welcoming party." Goo said.

…

Trout opened the door to Goo's house and sat down on the couch with Goo next to him.

"Ok Trout, tell me what defenses they have." Goo said

"Well, they have an aura of some sorts that capture any "ship" coming and, like, penetrates it with things that look like dangerous weapons." Trout said

"Well that's not very good."

"I don't know what I'm going to do. If I can't get a ship close enough, how in the world am I supposed to get in?"

"Well, there always is SPACE teleporting. You can always find a person in the ship willing to let you in."

"I guess I'll try to contact someone on it."

So Trout hopped onto Goo's program-filled computer and started searching for the pirate ship. He ended up on a website called 'The Pirate Bay' and checked the 'Staff' page. For some odd reason it listed all their orientations. Trout picked the only friendly guy and texted him.

"Hey man u open for da chats hit me up in those dm's if u know what im sayin dude btw im a cool dude i swear i will party only if you respond please respond i would like to party with you in the ship just text back, also the only reason my name is mark is because my parents died"

A few hours later the man responded

"Oh hai mark i was interested in party can u send it yo, my name is lisa because there was like a girl and i traded names ha ha party please"

Trout put on makeup, a cool party outfit, and generally looked like a party trap. Trout sent party preparation and the man responded.

"Oh dude i mean bro you are SO radical can u please teleport to me my location is M-770.5963654 T-I.58INSO485 G-TA-97-OT" Lisa responded.

Goo started laughing, "You actually got a guard to give you coords? What an absolutely intelligent individual, let me run it through to make sure it's not a trap."

"But I'm a tra-" Trout sai-

"NO NOT THAT KIND OF TRAP YOU FUNNY MAN."

"YOU HAVE FUN GAMES ALL ON YOUR COMPUTER DUDE."

"PLEASE BE QUIET."

"I WON'T BE QUIET UNTIL YOU ADMIT YOU'RE A GAMER."

"NO I WON'T"

"THEN WHY IS THERE A FOLDER CALLED PUZZLES"

"MY FRIEND WANTED SOME OK, ALSO THERE'S NO PUZZLES IN IT IT'S JUST REGULAR FUN VIDEO GAMES"

"NO IT CERTAINLY ISN'T"

Hours upon hours of bickering and yelling about video games echoed the destroyed streets of the town until they finally consumed a nonalcoholic and child friendly space drink™ and cooled down.

"Hey man, I'm sorry about saying you're a gamer."Trout said

"And I'm sorry for going nuclear about video games." Goo said

"Now let's make up by making dinner for each other!"

"Nope!" Goo hit switch to the teleport and teleported him to the ship, wearing a cool party hat, with Lisa staring at him.

Lisa gasped in horror, the guy he wanted to party with was actually a not very cool person.

"NO LISA THIS IS NOT WHAT IT LOOKS LIKE" Trout tried to make up.

"Oh…" Lisa looked down at his gun, grabbed it and disposed of it responsibly. "I mean, you were the only thing I strived to impress Mark"

"Actually my name is Trou-"

He started to cry, and lie on the floor in a ball.

"I still won't betray you Mark... Never…" Lisa said

"Hey can we still party?" Trout asked

"No, go on Trout, my party heart is broken into a thousand pieces, and the only way to heal it is by letting the truth soak in."

"Ok, then. I'll just- be uh, going."

Trout ran out the door and saw the space cafeteria.