Hey all, this is the first Yullen fic I've written in what feels like forever...actually, it's only been about a year since I posted Yullen, but I wrote Yullen stuff a few months ago...anyway, onwards. It's short as hell but whatever, I finished it. There will be a companion to this one from Kanda's perspective later this week.
Tbh this is ambiguous in terms of relationship stuff, but it was written for Yullen week and I am not a platonic Yullen shipper, so think what you will but it's classified as a vaguely romantic Yullen drabble.
Warning: canon-typical mentions of violence, references to child abandonment, and implications of Allen maybe dying in one way or another. All of which are completely canon.
For Yullen Week 2k15 Day One: Trust. Allen trusts Kanda to fullfill his promise and kill him should the 14th take over. Kanda refuses to break that trust, even with the pain of knowing he will once again be responsible for killing a companion due to his own mistakes.
Disclaimer: all characters present in this belong to Hoshino-sensei.
If there was anything that was true in the world, it was that Kanda Yuu kept his promises, even when keeping and carrying out a promise that seemed nigh impossible or detrimental to his health and sanity. Come Hell or high water, hordes of Akuma and Crows, or even the ten plagues of Egypt, the stubborn swordsman kept on with his trademark bullheaded stubbornness and bad attitude.
This was something Allen knew better than most after going on an unexpected sojourn into the man's memories. That was an experience he still found to be too enlightening an explanation for the man's state of being. He still felt pain and helpless anger at the tragedy of Alma Karma and the cruel abomination known as the Second Exorcist program, enough that it had made him cry and want to half-kill Kanda for throwing away his chance for a peaceful rest when he re-appeared with Johnny. But the declaration that was made to him—"I'll kill you if you let that bastard take over,"—was a statement he trusted.
Allen had to admit, he admired the man on multiple levels, even with how callous and rude and sword-happy he was. Kanda Yuu was an unstoppable force of nature when he set his mind to something, and with his characteristic lack of subtlety it was obvious that he regretted his actions at the American branch, though he was as gruff and as forceful as ever in the matter. After months of fighting and bickering back and forth, knowing the depths of Kanda's gratefulness was strange, especially when he had thanked him, called him by name, and most importantly came back for him.
The Earl and the Order alike had used and abused him for their own ends, with Kanda as a mere pawn in a greater plan. For all the pain—in body and soul—that he had felt ever since Kanda had screamed at him in mindless rage and Mugen pierced his flesh, Allen could not find it in himself to blame Kanda for what happened. The words that his comrade unleashed upon him in his fury were more painful than the agony of the flesh, and the pain of his sympathies for them was even greater. Still, it didn't change the fact that the 14th...that "Neah" was uncomfortably close to gaining control and erasing him.
He didn't want to be erased, he feared it and something inside him rebelled at the thought of dying. The same part of him that compelled him to keep on as a child in the streets, the part that clung to existence with all the ferocity of a terrified child, it quaked and cried out in denial at the very thought. But he could feel some of that fear abate when he witnessed the resolve that the other man held in his eyes. If he should die...then doing so by Kanda's hands felt right. He could trust that the man would carry through on his promise, and soon enough he would see the end.
So, I hope you enjoyed it, please let me know anything you liked or disliked. Ciao~
