A Hacker's Oath: Nostalgia Critic

(A Nostalgia Critic Fanfiction)

Chapter 1: Lieutenant Hacker Elvira

I stand in front of Colonel Hacker Ivan. For I was called in to receive a very rare mission. At least that's what I've been told. I stood at attention in front of his desk as I said, "You wish to see me, Colonel?"

"Yes I do, Lieutenant." he said, "You are assigned by General Necro herself to take on this mission."

Seriously?! General Necro is a legend in the Hacker society. This mission must be really important to assigned me for the task.

"What is my mission, sir?" I asked.

"Your mission is to protect Doug Walker, also known as Nostalgia Critic."

"... The movie reviewer?"

"Yes."

"... I apologize if I question this mission, but if I remember correctly he's not much of a gamer."

The Hacker society is mostly made up of gamers. There really is no place for YouTubers like him amongst our ranks. It's true lately there have been YouTube gamers going into comas because of our enemy The Virus, but they are all gamers not movie reviewers. What use will Doug Walker be to the Leader of The Virus?

"He's been watched for a while until one day he received a gift. We were able to destroy the package before he could even get it. It's no doubt The Virus society will try again, and this is why we're assigning you to protect him."

"For how long?"

"Four months is the minimum."

... At least it's not too long. Don't get me wrong I'm a fan myself of the Nostalgia Critic but... HE'S NOT A GAMER!

"Sir, it will be my honor to take on the mission."

... (Chicago)

I arrived at Doug Walker's studio. For the information I've gotten from the Colonel, Doug is hiring actors to work for him. I've already sent my fake info to Doug beforehand, so right now he's expecting me. I took a breath and walked in as I saw... surprisingly no one in the main room. Huh, I expected more people who would want to work for Nostalgia Critic. Then again Doug probably scheduled different hours and days to see other people who want the job.

Tamara, an actress who works for him, walked into the room to greet me. She said, "Hi there! Are you Elvira Raimi?"

"Yes I'm here for the interview." I said.

"Wait here, I'm going to get him for you."

She went away real quick and out came in Doug Walker. We shook hands as he said, "Hi, I'm Doug. It's Elvira right?"

"Yes sir." I said with a smile.

"We can do the interview in here where the comfortable couches are."

The couches are black leather but it looks comfortable enough. I'm not really one for leather even though that's what my uniform is made of. At least the uniform is quite comfortable to wear.

"So how long have you been acting?"

"Since middle school." I said.

"Wow, so you've been in plenty of plays then?"

"I've been in school plays, theater plays, and I've acted in more than a few videos when I'm helping out other people or my own friends."

"Ah so you've already gotten experience in acting. Have you ever worked with camera or lighting equipment before?"

"Yes I have my friends have taught me how to use different Canon cameras, and I've tried out the Arri light kits before."

"I have a light kit that's different from the Arri lights, I use Interfit lights. Reason why I asked is because sometimes the people who work for me have to leave for their jobs or are sick and can't come in for the shoot."

"Right and you need help when you don't have enough people. I understand completely I've done my fair share with helping other people with their videos. Especially moving and handling props for theaters."

...

The interview took at least about a good hour. While he was trying to get to know my uses for him, I was observing him to try and figure out why The Virus would be interested to have him. While real gamers are dropping like flies, I'm protecting a movie reviewer.

"Alright I believe I've got all the information I needed." he said, "I'll give you a call if you got the job."

"Right, have a good day, Mr. Walker."

"Please call me Doug."

"Right, Doug."

I see myself out and take a drive to this new apartment the Hacker society provided for me. It's spacious and quite comfy. I took a look around mostly to find the game room. Once I did I immediately hook myself up into the Matrix. No not the movie, the actual Matrix where most of us go to turn in our mission status reports. We have to put them in code to send it to the Hacker headquarters. After I finished up my report I went straight to bed.

The next day I've got a call from Doug. There was no doubt that I've got the job.