His Broken Smile

The smell of toast and coffee was the reason I was being dragged out of bed. I knew that was the familiar smell of a Monday morning. Amy would be up, dancing around the living room in her uniform, Liz would be sat in her silk dressing gown, with a mirror and make-up to keep her company and Aidan would be shovelling breakfast down his neck before he had to rush off to work.

I realise I am right as I open the door to the lounge through to kitchen and everyone turns to look at me.

"Morning." I beam, sitting down in the chair next to Aidan and pouring myself a coffee. "Any sign of Steve?"

"We thought he was with you." Liz frowns, not removing her eyes from the mirror she was staring intently into.

"...No." I shake my head. "He wasn't in bed when I woke up."

"Probably at the cab office." Aidan suggests. He had a point, since Lloyd had left there was a lot that needed to be sorted over there, not to mention our financial difficulties.

"I think he's taking Lloyd's departure pretty hard." Liz sighs.

"Well I'm not surprised. They were thick as thieves them two." I reminisce. "...I just hope he doesn't have another set back... If you know what I mean."

I hint without giving too much away to Amy who was now lacing her school shoes up and packing her bag.

"I'll have a word with him later." I add before turning to my step-daughter who was ready to leave for school. "Have a good day darling." I stand and hug her, which she responds to warmly.

"Is dad gonna be ok?" She asks, she wasn't stupid, she was eleven and fully aware of what was going on around her. She had been told of her dads illness when he was first diagnosed with depression, although he has kept it secret from all of us for months, pushing us away and breaking up with me. It was only after the minibus crash that I finally found out the truth behind it and since then we had been going strong.

"He'll be fine darling." I promise and she nods before virtually skipping out of the door. I hesitate for a second before turning back to my mother in law and cousin, contemplating what to do next. "...I'll um... Go bring those crates up from the cellar then."

"Well I'm off to work, else I'll be getting another lecture from Carla." Aidan rolls his eyes, shifting his jacket over his shoulders. "See you later."

"See ya." I watched him go.

"Michelle?" Liz interrupts my silence and I turn again to face her. "Go find Steve."

"No no, it's fine." I force a smile onto my face. "I've got things to do here and I can't leave you in the lurch."

"I'll be fine." She confirms and I exhale slowly, debating whether to persist further. Instead, I just nod at her and reach over to squeeze her hand before heading upstairs to get changed.

*
I open the door to Streetcars as quietly as possible, so as to not disturb Steve. It was unlocked, which was a positive sign that I had located him. However, when I clap my eyes on him; sat in a chair with his head in his folded arms on the desk, I realise he was not equally feeling my optimism.

I just stare at him sympathetically for a while. Liz had been right; Steve was devastated over being separated from his best friend, they had been inseparable for years before I even came to the street. It was an end of an era for him.

"Hey." I whisper, breathlessly, leaning with my elbows on the counter of the hatch. He gives a slight jump at hearing my voice and turns instantly to face me, clearly still lost in thought. "You weren't in bed, I was worried."

"...I just had a few things to sort here." He tells me, voice hoarse.

"Evidently." I smile and slowly manoeuvre myself to pass through the door, careful not to sit in the chair where Lloyd would have generally placed myself. Instead, I hoist myself up on the desk in front of him, legs swinging freely off the edge. He stares down at the floor for a while in silence before lifting his eyes to meet mine.

"Sorry." He mutters, but sincerely. I didn't know what he was apologising for but I accepted it either way.

"You don't have to be sorry darling." I was seated slightly above him by sitting on the desk, which allowed me to easily run my fingers through his hair. "I just want to know you're going to be ok. We all do."

"...I'll get there." He sighs. "I think I just need... Time, to let it sink in."

I nod, moving my hand from his hair to entwine my fingers with his. We sit in silence for a while as he twists my wedding ring round my finger proudly.

"You know I'm always here for you don't you?" I whisper again, breaking the comfortable silence and he raises his head, nodding slowly. I kiss his forehead before jumping off the desk, letting go of his hand as I walk towards the door. "I'll leave you to it then. Don't be too long."

"I won't." He stares at me intently. "I love you."

"I love you too." I smile at him before pulling the door open. The fresh Autumn air greets me abruptly and I breathe it in, a mixture of sorrow and contentment washing over me.

*
"Yes folks, what can I get you?" I walk over to serve two more customers and pull their pints of bitter, taking their money and flashing a grateful smile as they tell me to keep the change.

"So you saw Steve then?" Liz asks me, heading to the back of the bar and leaning up against the framework.

"Yep." I bite my lip. "But he didn't look good... He said he just needs time to get used to things... So I suppose we just make sure he keeps taking his medication and help him the best we can."

"I'm glad he's got you." Liz smiles at me, which shocks me slightly. I would classify her as my best mate nowadays except for Carla but we used to hate each other.

"He's got both of us." I tell her and she nods in response. We knew we were right, no matter what, we weren't turning our backs on him.

*
It was late when Steve entered the Rovers through the main door. At first, I was concerned about his disappearance all day, but as he approaches the bar I notice he is looking a bit happier.

"Hi." He kisses me as he joins me round the other side of the bar.

"You ok?" I ask him and he nods, a smile appearing on his face. He withdraws his hand from behind his back and produces a small black bag, handing it to me. "What's this?" I frown, taking it from him and he just watches silently as I open it, pulling out a black box that inside contains a sleek, silver bangle, rhinestones dotted evenly around its edge. I gasp slightly as I slide it onto my arm and then look up at his hesitant expression. "What's this for?"

"I needed to treat you." He mumbles, embarrassed about these sorts of things. "You've been a rock to me this last year."

"Babe, you didn't have to buy me anything." My mouth hangs open, before I lean in and kiss him, wrapping my arms around his neck and meeting my eyes with his.

"I've been... Difficult." He sighs and I shake my head, our closeness probably a distraction to the punters but we didn't care. "I went for a walk today and I was just trying to clear my head. Lloyd leaving has made me realise I need to appreciate everything to the full, you never know when it might slip from your grasp."

"...Yeah well I'm not slipping anywhere." I whisper, kissing him again. "Thank you."